Finally another chapter!
I hope you all enjoy the story,
even though the updates are slow. :(
I will continue to do my best!
Tinywings

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Taemin was standing in front of the door, hesitating whether to go on or not. Something was screaming for him to go on, to ring the bell and talk with the new owner of the house. But maybe it was the awkwardness of simply going to someone’s house, because technically it was not his house anymore, that he hesitated. Taemin pressed the bell, and hearing the familiar ring softens his heart. After all this time, he was still attached to this place and every detail it possessed. The door opened finally, revealing the person he wanted to see.

“Lee Taemin-sshi?”

Taemin scratched his head nervously.

“I-I came to ask if there are no problems in the house. I mean, as the previous owner, I am responsible of it.”

He awkwardly lied himself out of it, and she seemed to believe it, because an innocent smile appeared on her lips.

“There are no problems, but thank you.”

She glanced inside before locking her eyes with his, making him instantly alert.

“Do you mind coming in? I will make you a warm cup of tea.”

Taemin smiled thankfully.

“Thank you, I would like to.”

She let him inside before walking into the kitchen. Taemin’s eyes scanned the house instantly, and he felt relieved as he saw that almost nothing changed. It was still the house he lived in, the house he filled with precious memories.

“Here you go.”

She said as she handed him the cup of tea.

“Thank you.”

She once again answered him with her bright smile.

“And, do you like the house?”

He asked as he drank from his tea.

“I love it.”

She said, and he could clearly see the excitement and happiness on her face. How he wished he could be like that again, but he cannot. He chained himself, so he will never forget what he did. That is the only way to pay for what he had done.

“Taemin, is something bothering you?”

She suddenly asked, waking him up from his thoughts.

“N-no, not at all.”

She searched for his eyes, as if she knew he was lying. It made him feel incredibly uncomfortable to feel her eyes on him.

“Then why do you look so unhappy?”

“There is no such thing.”

He responded, feeling uncomfortable with the topic.

“I think Lee Taemin-sshi looks handsomest when smiling.”

She said with a smile.

“What makes you say that?”

Once again, her smile never wavered.

“Because angels should always smile.”

There it was again, the word he had heard more than once already. He did not understand why she called him an angel, because really, he was not.

“Stop calling me that.”

She looked at him surprised. Taemin was surprised with the amount of coldness he was talking right now, because never did he spoke in such a manner to anyone before.

“Stop calling me an angel, because I do not deserve it.”

His eyes stung because of the forming tears.

“I am unworthy to be called an angel. I… I killed the person I loved… I was the one who killed her, because I was selfish.”

“Taemin, I really think I have to tell you something.”

Jonghyun said as he hugged me tightly.

“You are acting strange.”

Taemin said while chuckling, but the lack of response from his friend instantly silenced him.

“Taemin, I apologize for lying to you. You should know, though.”

Taemin wore a puzzled look, not knowing what his friend is saying.

“The previous owner… died two years ago in a car accident.”

“I-I see…”

Taemin did not mind those things, actually, as long as it was not a cruel murder or scare death inside the house, but he knew that Jonghyun wanted to imply something.

“She died… in front of the restaurant you had your birthday.”

And that was when everything made sense. The reason why she never responded to him again, the reason why she said she may not be able to see him, because… She was someone from two years ago. She was someone from the past. But most importantly… It was because of him, that she died.

“You did not.”

The girl suddenly said with a serious expression on her face. Taemin scoffed ironically.

“And how would you know?”

Taemin cannot forgive himself, he even told himself to always blame himself, so at least his first love’s death will always be fresh in his mind. If he forgave himself, and think about it as an accident, then he would be lying in his opinion. If it was not for his selfish request, she would still be living.

“Lee Taemin-sshi, I think you misunderstood something.”

She said, trying to tell Taemin that his way of thinking is wrong. She did whatever needed to come here, so she could explain it all to him. Getting this house was something she desperately wanted, because she needed it just in case he still could not let go of it. She promised she would do whatever needed to get Taemin happy again, even if it means that she needs to rewrite the past.

“What could I have possibly misunderstood?”

She drank her tea, thinking thoroughly about what she wanted to do. In the end she decided to keep it all a secret from him. Maybe, just maybe, she would be able to make him happy again, without having to change anything. She had no confidence it would all end well, if she were to change even the slightest thing.

“I think she does not blame you at all, Taemin-sshi. She loved you too much to do so.”

She really did, Taemin. A sorrowful smile crept on his lips.

“That is precisely why I will never forgive myself.”      

-

“Taemin-sshi…”

She muttered as she glanced at the cup of tea he left unfinished. He had left the house after a long moment of silence, not being able to take the awkwardness anymore. However, his words were still echoing in her head.

“That is precisely why I will never forgive myself.”      

“Please stop giving yourself so much pain…”

Taemin was blaming himself for what has happened, it was killing him. She looked at the diary in her hand, pondering about what to do. She knew she could change the past, but she did not want to. She promised her she would bring Taemin happiness without doing so. She cannot disappoint Sulli.

“Sooyeon, please promise-”

She shook her head heavily.

“How can I-”

“Sooyeon, he means too much for me. We both know we were playing with time, and that this would be the result.”

Indeed, she knew it very well. It was so painfully stupid that they even wanted to try, but Sulli did not regret even a little bit of it. She enjoyed writing with Taemin so much, and she started relying on him so much, that she just could not stop herself anymore.

“Sooyeon,” Sulli continued with her weak voice, “if you were to find him, please find out if he is still smiling. Please watch over him. If… If he really cannot let go of the past, please create a better future for him.”

“”H-how-”

“If possible, without changing everything. We already changed too much.”

Sooyeon could only nod her head, promising Sulli to do what she can.

“Sulli, I will make sure to find him, and I promise you I will make him smile.”

After Sulli died, she has been watching over Taemin. She saw how Taemin smiled brightly as he lived life, and how he fell in love with Sulli. She saw how he got to know the fact that Sulli passed away, how his smile vanished instantly. She can still clearly remember the day Taemin left the house, the sorrowful face he wore as he cried while apologizing. She knew how he had been living life this past year, and slowly, watching him began to pain her. That is why she decided to buy the house, to set up the plan she was unwilling to accomplish. She hopes that maybe, just maybe, she can open him up with her words and deeds, so she does not have to change anything anymore. The consequences, she does not want to bear any of them anymore. The moment Sulli died, she had decided with full determination that she wants to live the life that presents itself to her, without changing it.