{ tw; homophobic slurs, verbal abuse, etc. }

- FLASHBACK.-

"I like you.." he whispered, as the tan male held onto his hand, his cheeks were dusted by a light crimson colour and his eyes shone slightly in admiration as he stared at the boy in front of him.
 Coughing slightly, said boy pointed at himself in disbelief, biting onto his lower lip while tipping his head to the side, "Me..?"

Luhan nodded with a smile, lowering his gaze in a shy manner; "Mhm... who else? I know you like me too.."

Jongin let out a quiet chuckle at this, "Mm? And how do you know that?"

"You don't look at the other boys your grade quite like you look at me." It was true, too...Jongin had always liked Luhan, he was pretty, nice and the star of the school's soccer team making him simply...cool, and slightly untainnable. "I notice your eyes are always glued to me."

"That doesn't matter, we are both boys." Jongin whispered with a nod,swallowing thickly as Luhan's fingertips crawled up his chest, stopping by his uniform's collar.

Luhan frowned a little, nodding his head non the less as he dropped his hand by his side, eyes reeking Jongin's face for some sort of signal that he didn't mean what he said.

"Everyone in this school already thinks I am a ...I don't want them to hurt you with words as well, Luhan." he mumbled, a small frown on his face  at the simple thought of someone as fragile as Luhan being treated wrongly, "They think is weird that you spend so much time with me.."

"But...we are friends." Luhan pointed out with a nod, his eyebrows furrowed and eyes squinted, not wanting to mention how he'd rather if Jongin didn't refer to himself with such a word.

"Friends don't hold hands."

"I hold hands with Minseok all the time."

"But he's got a girlfriend, nobody questions you both."

Luhan stood quiet, knowing Jongin was right but choosing not to say anything.

"We can keep it a secret." He finally spoke, a hopeful tone on his voice as his tongue darted out, flickering nervously over the scar located just under his lower lip.

"Luhan.."Jongin warned, not liking the idea all that much.

"Jongin.." he mimicked, his arms dangling by his sides.

"This won't end right, we'll get hurt.."

"I am willing to risk it." He finally said, speaking confidently while holding one of Jongin's hands on his own, lacing their fingers as though it was the most natural thing to do.

And perhaps it was. Jongin stared at their hands

"...okay" a soft sigh of defeat escaping his plump lips,  small smile tugging on his mouth at the simple sight of Luhan's bright grin.

Yes, Jongin thought, he is worth it.

_

Hours turned into days and days turned into weeks. And Jongin hoped those weeks would eventually turn into months, who would later turn into years.

He was falling hard and fast, it was nearly painful but so, so beautiful.

Luhan was the missing part he always looked for- it was so crazy he thought it could almost work. 
Until one day it all changed.

Jongin was outside the school grounds, sitting just under the shade of a large tree, his back rested comfortably against it; legs stretched out and crossed over one another.

The weather was great, the sun shone trough the trees and over the grass making it look greener than it actually was.

He could see a few students taking photos, already expecting to see them on instagram later during the day.

Typical, he thought, a small chuckle slipping pass his lips as he adjusted his shoe laces, reaching for his cellphone as it beeped faintly, squinting his eyes a little.

A new text message from Luhan.

He smiled as he swiftly slided his thumb over the bar, unlocking it.

He read trough the message, a confused look taking over his features at the sight of those four words.

'We need to talk' No kisses, or emoticons, nothing else.

It sounded strange, he stuffed his phone inside his school bag and pushed himself up, dusting off the creases of his trousers.

He figured Luhan was probably waiting for him behind the school, so he naturally headed there and surely, there was Luhan.

"Hi." He spoke softly, watching as Luhan lifted his gaze off his worn out converse and flashed a small, nearly gentle smile to Jongin. "...What did you want to talk about?"

Luhan's smile dropped in nearly an instant, a distant look taking over instead.

Jongin didn't know what it was about it that seemed so...wrong.

After what seemed like eternal silence Luhan finally spoke, "I can't continue seeing you."

Jongin blinked a few times, feeling as though all the air had been knocked off his lungs; because he felt as though everything was more than great between the two of them, he could only utter one word, "W-why..?"

Luhan's face seemed to visibly pale at this, letting out a gentle breath slip out, "My brother....he found out about us."

Jongin's eyes widened, he didn't know much of Luhan's family but he knew that like his own parents, Luhan's parents were very strict, "H-he said he wouldn't tell mum and dad if I stopped seeing you...-Jongin, I-I am so sorry." Luhan said, placing a hand over his own forehead and brushing a dark strand of hair away from his eyes.

Jongin shook his head, "Y-you said you'd risk it, Luhan..."

Luhan opened his mouth as though he was going to say something only to close it again.

"Can I, at least get a last kiss..?" He whispered quietly, watching as Luhan looked up at him, nodding his head ever so slowly.

He felt his hands shake as Luhan stepped forward, standing in front of him and placing his hands on each side of Jongin's head as said boy leaned his back against the wall, his eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of Luhan's warm breath ghosting over his lips; long dark lashes resting delicately against bronze skin.

Their lips met in a sweet liplock.

The kiss was gentle and loving at first almost as if it were their first,  lips molded perfectly together, moving in perfect harmony almost like they belonged against one another But soon it turned eager, desperate even,  tongues dancing together and teeth clashing against one another's messily, it almost started to hurt but they didn't dare break away.

Jongin could sense the faint taste of gatorade on Luhan's tongue(strawberry, was it?).

He realised he'd miss it.

A quiet moan escaped him as he pressed Luhan's body even closer to his own, the feeling of Luhan's chest pressed against his making his heart beat slightly faster and his head to spin, the feeling of the older's trousers against the palm of his hand as he traced his hand along the curve of his , cheeks flushing a light pink colour.

It didn't last long, his eyes snapping open at the sound of leaves rustling close by.

Luhan was the first one to pull away, eyes searching around frantically only to land on Jongin's face once again as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand; a disgusted look  taking part of his usually smiling face as his pale hands collided onto the dancer's chest in an attempt to push him away.

"You filthy !"

Jongin blinked in confusion, eyes glassy and lips swollen as he attempted on catching his breath, not used to being spoken in such a manner by Luhan he realized the word he had grown accostumed to being called stinged a little badder.

"L-Luhan...what?"

Luhan shook his head, a look of pure hatred taking over his features. "Everyone was right about you."

"You are disgusting, Kim Jongin. Don't you ever dare touch me again."

And just like that Luhan stormed off,leaving a teary eyed and confused Jongin watching after him.

A few tears slid down his cheeks once he raised his gaze, the truth of the moment making his chest clench...because Luhan had called him disgusting...the only person that ever made him feel worth it; was telling him the exact opposite.
Opening his eyes he was met by one of the tallest boys on his grade; Luhan's brother.

"You actually touched him?" He questioned, a disgusted expression on his face, as he took a few small steps closer to the shorter male.

Jongin blinked away the tears that threatened to fall, pushing at the other with all his strenght and running across the school's backyard, listening as Luhan's brother called over at some of the younger boys and girls.

His legs hurt but he just kept running, not knowing where to go but he kept running.

He knew what would happened to him if he stopped, he'd seen it happen before.

He made a turn only to realize he was at the school's gym; his eyes searching frantically for somewhere to hide, he jumped slightly at the sound of the door closing behind him.

He turned around, facing a few of his angry classmates

Two girls and three boys.

Jongin gulped, and feared all at once...

...he was only one.

a;n

wow. this is the worst chapter yet.

dont worry i promise my skills get better from here on

 i had wrotten this already but had to fix it a little (more like try to because ew.)

GOOD NEWS THOUGH

 i got my laptop back so now my updates will literally be way faster and hopefully better which is always good ha.

anyway, i hope you all liked this, thank you to anyone that has read this poo. i am sorry for wasting your precious time haha.