5.

Just A Little

~*~

Jongin sat at the edge of the bed with his head hung low and his shoulders deflated in misery. It has been close to a week since Lana’s gone and it was hell for him. He wished he didn’t wake up so early and stay unconscious longer. He couldn’t bear being up and about yet not having Lana by his side. However, not waking up and lying unconscious would only mean he won’t have the chance to fight for her. At least, staying up allowed him to train himself just so he could become strong enough to bring her back.

Either way, it was torturous for him. Over-exaggeration? That’s just how it was. She’s his mate and no matter how hard he tried to face the fact that she wasn’t with him, he just failed.

“Lana, why –“ Jongin muttered under his breath. A tear dropped as he remembered the last night together. She shouldn’t have left him. The sacrifice she made to keep him alive was too hard for him to accept. “You promised you won’t leave.” He said as more tears flowed down.

Jongin lifted up his hands and looked at the scars and bruises. His body has healed but the scars were still there. His eyes darted down to his bare body where there were more scars. In frustration, Jongin ran his fingers across his hair and stood abruptly. He couldn’t stay here anymore. He had to do something. He must take her back. He must.

Without giving another second thought, Jongin dashed out of the room, down the stairs and went out of the house. The rest of EXO noticed his sudden behaviour and immediately became alert. Jongin’s act of rash would only do more harm than good. Hence, the rest of EXO got up on their feet and chased after him out of the house.

“Jongin!” Joonmyun yelled but the younger male pushed the door out. He pushed it so hard that the solid wooden door broke apart.

“Jongin, stop! It’s an order!” Kris yelled this time yet despite an order, Jongin remained on deaf ears.

Sehun, Tao and Yixing followed behind closely. The rest of them stayed while some exited through the back door.

Mira who was at the back yard sitting casually on a rock stood up when she heard the loud bang from the house. She knew something was not right when she heard yelling. Within seconds, she watched Jongin running towards her with a furious glare. It was so furious that her eyes turned wide in surprise. She has never seen Jongin so mad.

“Oppa, don’t.” Mira said but of course, Jongin ignored her presence and went straight into the forest.

Just like Jongin, Mira acted rashly and chased after him into the forest; an area she wasn’t allowed to be inside alone.

Luhan shook his head and shouted. “Mira, stay behind!” However, Mira was just as stubborn and continued. It only took him a few seconds before he managed to grab her arm and stop her from chasing Jongin. “Mira, don’t –“

“Let go!” Mira screamed angrily. She wanted to be with Jongin and pulled him back home.

“No, Mira. It’s too dangerous.” Luhan stopped giving the chase and concentrated on taking Mira back safely. However, the girl refused to budge. “Let the guys handle Jongin.”

Meanwhile, Kris picked up his speed and trailed slightly behind Jongin. Just a little more and he managed to grab Jongin’s arm. He pulled him quite harshly causing the younger male to hit his back against the ground. Jongin yelped not in pain but out of frustration. He glared angrily at Kris who in return growled at him as well.

Joonmyun, Yixing and Tao caught up and encircled Jongin who was on the ground. Hard breathing could be heard after the run yet they showed no signs of exhaustion. Kris grabbed Jongin’s arm roughly and dragged him up.

“What were you thinking?!” Kris spat at Jongin whose face was still grave.

“Jongin, this isn’t the way.” Joonmyun spoke in a nicer tone as compared to the short-tempered Kris.

“Whatever you’re doing is going to land her in serious trouble. You’re walking into a land mine, for goodness sake!” Kris yelled once again.

Jongin spitted the ground before speaking. “I must get her back.”

“Everyone wants her back but this is not the way.” Yixing consoled nicely.

“For how long?! I can’t let her marry that filthy blood er!” Jongin pushed Kris and stood a few metres away from the rest.

Tao approached him slowly. “Listen, it’s not easy for her either. She had to sacrifice –“

“Where were you guys?! You should have stopped her!” Jongin scolded. His body began to tremble and his muscles tensed.

Joonmyun shook his head regretfully. “We tried but –“

“It’s her decision.” Luhan joined together with Mira beside him. “And you have to respect that.”

“No, it’s not.” Jongin refused to believe. He shook his head and rejected his claim vehemently.

Luhan hated seeing Jongin’s state and he felt even worst telling him about Lana. He knew Lana’s decision was made under duress because she only wanted to save Jongin and never wanted to leave them. “This is not what she wants but this is what she needs to fulfil.”

“She can’t marry him!” Jongin snarled and then dropped to his knees. He covered his face and started sobbing angry tears.

Mira who has been watching them all along went up to Jongin. Instead of consoling him, she gave him a tight slap across his face. Her eyes were filled with tears. “Fool.” She mumbled. Jongin’s eyes widened after receiving the slap as he looked at Mira. “Do you have to be such a love sick fool?!” She bit her lip and glared angrily at him.

“Mira –“ Jongin’s expression softened as he watched Mira’s tears fell down her cheeks.

“If you love her so much then stop acting like a fool. Why torture yourself?! Instead, learn to think and act wisely. Then maybe someday, you’ll get her back. But for now, I beg you just please don’t hurt yourself anymore.” Mira blurted out. Her voice was serious yet pleading.

Sehun stepped forward and said. “’Mira’s right. We shouldn’t be acting based on emotions. We should think wisely before we act.”

Jongin looked down in shame. They were right. He was only making things worse by acting stupidly. He glanced at the faces of his brothers and he could see that they shared the same pain as him. In their eyes, he sensed their will to stay strong. And to bring Lana back just like what he wished for. Hence, he must work with them and not overcome this alone. He turned to Mira and gave the girl a tight hug. He gently her back, letting her cry in his chest.

“Mira, I’m sorry.”  Jongin apologised. “I’m sorry.” He then turned to the rest of EXO who was more than willing to forgive him.

Mira stayed in Jongin’s embrace for as long. She missed his warmth. Now that Lana’s gone, she could be by his side without any hindrance. And she wished it would stay this way forever. This was the right opportunity to win Jongin’s heart back.

~**~

Lana tossed and turned in bed with cold sweat trickled down her forehead. Eventually, she jolted up and was instantly on a sitting position. She was panting heavily and her fingers felt the wetness of her cheeks. Once again, she was having nightmare. It seemed like it was going to be another sleepless night for her. She pulled her knees up and hugged tightly as she shivered. That night it was unusually cold. She glanced up the wall clock to see that it was just past midnight. Although she went to bed early, it was useless now that she was already up not even halfway through the night. She let out a long heavy sigh as she thought of what was about to happen the next day.

Tomorrow would be the day she and Yongguk finally engaged.

Just the thought of it sent her emotions run wild. Honestly, she was afraid. Ever since she stepped into the palace, there was never a time she felt secure and safe. Even with Yongguk around and beside her, she still felt intimidated and tried to keep a distance away from him. Besides, she didn’t want to be emotionally attached with him.

However, that night, suddenly she wished he would come see her. She just needed someone to prevent her from falling deeper into an emotional wreck.

Lana sniffed and let her tears dropped. It was the only time she could display her vulnerable state. From her bed, she stared out the window to see the full moon shining ominously at her. Even the moon, who accompanied her every night, seemed terrifying in her eyes out of a sudden. Slowly, Lana pushed herself out of bed and walked towards the balcony. She unlocked the door and stepped outside. A sudden gush of cold wind engulfed her body and immediately she regretted the idea of wandering out at the balcony.

But something caught her eyes just a few metres away on the ground floor. His pale skin which illuminated more brightly among the darkness and glowing eyes drew her attention. She felt curious. Although her stomach was contracting in fear, she continued forward because she knew he was none other than Yongguk. He wasn’t going to hurt her. She trusted him.

Yongguk sensed presence and looked up to see Lana staring at him up at the balcony. He was about to venture into the forest when he heard her soft heart beat. True enough, it was her. Feeling slightly worried that she was still up; he walked back until he stood just below her room. With great ease, he jumped and grabbed the ledge which was second storey high. Swiftly, he pulled himself up and landed smoothly just right before her.

“Oh my –“ Lana stuttered when Yongguk appeared in front. She almost stumbled backwards but thankfully there was a wall behind and her back hit against it. She kept forgetting that Yongguk wasn’t human and he possessed unimaginable strength; just like Jongin.

“Lana, are you alright?” Yongguk asked worriedly as his eyes scanned her face.

Lana shook her head and stammered nervously. “I’m f-f-fine.”

“You should be inside. It’s cold and –“ Yongguk stopped briefly and gazed tenderly into her eyes. “Tomorrow will be a long day. You should get some rest.” Lana didn’t answer and continued staring at him with wide eyes. “Lana?” He called.

“Can you take me somewhere?” Lana gathered her courage and finally asked.

Yongguk tilted his head and eyed her questioningly. “Alright. Where do you want to go?”

“The forest...” She answered.

“But –“

“Please, I beg you.” She pleaded.

Yongguk reached out his hand and pulled her towards him. “Okay I will.”

Lana smiled and followed. She just wanted to be out of the palace. She just wanted to go to the forest because she missed it so much.

Because the forest reminded her of Jongin...

Yongguk held Lana’s hand tightly as he led the way inside the dark forest. He became her eyes and navigated the way. Everything was just darkness and silence for Lana but she willingly let herself be guided by Yongguk. She didn’t know where he was going to bring her but just being inside the nature was enough for her. The smell of trees and woods turned her giddy with happiness after long while. After walking for a while, they suddenly stopped.

“If you try anything funny, I will break your neck.” Yongguk suddenly spoke harshly. Upon hearing his tone of voice, Lana trembled frighteningly. “You can see her tomorrow but right now, stay away.” He added.

“Yong –“

Lana didn’t even get to finish her word when Yongguk pulled her to move. This time, he wrapped his arm tightly around her waist and stood behind her protectively. She continued following him until they finally reached the lake.

Oh she missed it so much...

Yongguk settled her by the rock and then slumped beside her. She turned to see his face and noticed the frown.

“What was that?” She finally got to ask.

Yongguk shook his head and replied. “Nothing; just someone loitering...”

Judging from his voice and look, Lana knew he was referring to another vampire that was in the forest. Hence, she looked down and said. “I’m sorry for insisting on going to the forest.”

Yongguk flashed a smile instantly. “Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault.” He didn’t mean to make Lana feel bad. Even though he was aware how dangerous her presence among the vampires, he wasn’t going to restrict her freedom. He knew she just wanted some time away from the palace.

Lana shifted her seat and sat close to Yongguk; the closest she has ever been with him. Yongguk noticed that she was slightly shivering from the cold air and took off his jacket and draped it around her. She didn’t refuse and let the jacket wrap her cold body. Slowly, he pulled her closer and placed his arm around her. However, he realised it won’t do much on her. He could never be warm. He was always as cold as ice.

“I don’t think I’m qualified to be the Queen but I’ll try my best to be one.” Lana suddenly spoke as she stared straight across the lake. Her mind wondered.

“Just be yourself.” Yongguk responded without hesitation.

Lana let out a short laugh. “Be myself? I have to win them, Yongguk. I have to win their trust; the vampires and the Council.” She said rather depressingly.

Yongguk remained silent.

“I’m scared. I’m scared I will disappoint many.” Lana confessed. “Am I even worthy to marry you?”

“Lana –“ Yongguk blurted.

“It’s unfair for you.” She didn’t allow him the chance to speak.

Yongguk understood her words. She didn’t feel the same way for him as how he was feeling for her. He knew it.

Gently, he let her head rest on his shoulder as he cuddled her. “You are the most perfect to be Queen in my eyes and that is all.”

Whatever happened, Lana was Yongguk’s one and only. No matter how the rest would see her, he would never trade her for anyone else; or any other female vampires. It was going to be tough for her, undeniably; to be accepted as part of the cold ones. But it was going to be just as tough for him too; never to receive a little part of her heart.

"I will love thess till, my dear,

While the sands o' life shall run..."

To be continued...