I don’t know if suggest there is ‘love’ in my life or even a ‘like’. So a few chapters ago I talked about my love life. Well there isn’t to much to it, so I focused more about the creepy guy that stalks me and another guy that is friend zoning me.

Having a crush or liking someone, I don’t know. The guy nearest to having a crush is this guy. In some ways I do have a crush on him and some ways I don’t. I don’t think I even like him. If that sounds right? Well I work with him and from my last update, yes he is the confusing guy. Weeks have gone and yes he’s still confusing as ever. At first it drove me crazy but now I don’t care anymore. I’ve gotten use to it.

So he is a nice guy but around me he’s playfully mean to me. I accept being friends right? Well he has become even more confusing as he got my number right? Well he texts me, like small talk because he doesn’t text much. Well he asks me if I’ve been to such places like go karting and I admit that I haven’t. When I send that text you’d expect him to answer back with, “Lets go together?” no I didn’t get a message like that back. Instead I got a reply of, “Well you should, it’s fun,” DAFAQ??? Like what the hell was that.

The weird thing is he tells me everything, all his secrets and such. We text and snap chat a lot so I know he at least cares about me. We both go to different Universities, he goes to the one in the middle of our city and I got to the one a few stations away from the city. He knows I hang out in the city a lot because I get bored and my university is close anyways. He texted me yesterday asking if I was in the city, I was actually with my mum to have breakfast. I replied with, “yes, why you ask?” and guess what reply I got. Yeah I didn’t get a reply. You’d expect a reply saying yeah wanna hang or something. Then I texted him asking him if he was working later that day and instantly I got a text from him straight away saying he is. Like, seriously!

Before he calls me dude, man or dawg now I’ve notice he isn’t which I don’t mind. But calling me those names are signs of him showing our friendship right? OOOH I almost forgot, he one time surprised me on the train. He knows what train I caught to University so he surprised me on the train.

Like I said we go to 2 different universities, he goes to QUT in the city and I go to UQ which is a few stops from the city. So originally I stay longer on the train and he gets off a few stops before me. No, he said he doesn’t want to go to his lectures so he decided to get off with me. I told him I didn’t want to go to class yet so we decided to go get breakfast together near my university.

We had breakfast and chilled for an hour, he had to leave because he had to hand in an assignment. I love how is willing to catch a train back to the city just for me, honestly I wouldn’t do that.  Like why would I go all the effort to catch two trains?

I still don’t get how people easily have boyfriends, or can chat a guy up. For me, it’s so hard? I guess I’ve never experienced a guy come into my life and suddenly affection grows. No never, and it’s not as easy as it seems in the movies.

Right now, I don’t want a boyfriend I’m happy begin myself. I don’t seen myself dating the guy I am talking about because I don’t see myself dating at all. What I’m trying to say is that I’m not ready yet, I’m young and settling down is not an option let’s be honest here. 

I guess you can now call him my friend as I don’t really like him that much. Well enough to consider something more from him. Honestly, writing my feelings out makes me come to realize that I don’t even like him that much at all. We text, we talk like friends and we hang out like normal friends, so far our relationship is growing into a great friendship which I’m happy about. You gotta have a guy friend at least one in your life, right?

Wow when they say writing your feelings makes you feel good, it actually does. Now I know what I feel inside.