Chapter 3: Why? And Not a Word

We all got into Teen Top’s van I chatted with each of the members as we drove on through the streets of Seoul, except with Yuri who kept glancing over at me and I at her.  When we finally arrived I was confused.

“Why are we here?” I asked.

“You’ll see.”  Niel said.  We had arrived at a hotel and as I followed them I noticed we were going up to the very top of the hotel.  When the elevator door opened it opened into a giant room that was a house and on the right was a hall of rooms. 

“Surprise!” L.joe said putting his arm around my waste, which I admit made my spine tingle.

“Wow, you’re living here.” I said in awe.

“Yep, and now so are you.”  I froze at those words.  If he said what I think he said that meant I would be living. With. People.  My worst nightmare now challenging me well I wasn’t going for the bait.

“Don’t play around like that L.joe it’s not very nice.” I gulped.

“Well I’m not playing around.  I’m serious since Yuri and Chunji are dating she’s staying here as well so . . . I wanted you to stay here as well we haven’t seen each other in so long.”  He looked a little embarrassed and flustered at babbling on.

And I did something I would forever scold myself for I smiled, a real smile not my fake depressed act ones.  But a real one that I hadn’t expressed on my face in an entire year now.  One that would break my heart sooner or later I knew that. 

After a tour of the house we were all able to go to our rooms I went to mine and threw my luggage on the cleanly made bed.  Before walking out to find Yuri so we could have a little “chat.”  And I saw her down the hall standing by her room, when she captured my glare she turned to go into her room leaving the door wide open.  When I walked in I slammed the door shut.

“Please don’t slam the doors we are not the ones who have to pay for them she said.”  I didn’t believe she had the nerve.  My face turned into a scowl.

“What makes you think I give a damn?  Why?” I cried out. “Why are you doing this to me? You above all people know my condition this was supposed to be starting over!  And I can tell you starting over does not involve crawling back to old friends.”  She just simply sat there looking down and then she spoke.

“This is a good way to start over for you—” She began but I cut her off I was tired of hearing this bull.

“No it’s not. Just because you want to stay with Chunji your boyfriend and live your life means my life comes second . . . e-even with my own mother I was in the way of her life so she sent me away.”

“How can you even say that!?  Do you even know what kind of pain we all went through when you were depressed? You know what nevermind.  It doesn’t matter the point is is that you are staying here.”

Hmm these words sound very familiar (referring to chapter one).

“Sure it’ll be all fun in games until they see the burns on my arms or find out I’m mentally screwed some other way and then my lame attempt at life here will end.”  I saw Yuri about to speak but I walked out the door before she could speak another word making sure to slam the door shut.

I was sitting on my bed blaring Skrillex into my ears when L.joe knocked on the door and let himself in.  I didn’t even see him till I felt my headphones yanked out of my head.

“Aiiish Dongseng could you have the music any louder.” I thought about how to respond I chose to pretend I’m normal and life is amazing.

“Hmmm yes actually I could.”  L.joe looked at me smiling that dazzling smile.

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