Another month passed, LuHan trying his best to mind his own business and just work. For the first time in his life he threw everything he had into his work, and it showed in the smiles of the customers and the gleaming floors that he worked so hard to clean every night. Vinson no longer glared at him with every chance he got, and Mrs. Luo was back to her kind and controlled self. The biggest change had been in Grandfather Tzu; ever since that day that LuHan had smoothed over the customers, the old man had taken a bit of a liking to the tall young man. In slower moments in the restaurant, he would pull LuHan back into the kitchens to show him a bit of what he did; how to break the egg into egg drop soup or how to chop the vegetables in the right sizes for the stir fry. One day he mentioned that if LuHan could wake earlier then he could show him more things, and though the old LuHan would have scoffed at some old man teaching him how to cook, the new one began to make an effort to rise earlier and help the old man make breakfast. 

He was surprised that the more he worked, the less tired he was by days end, and he finally admitted to himself that it was probably because his body was getting used to working and not just sitting around all day. He never got a day off since the restaurant was open seven days a week, but he was beginning to find that he didn’t mind. He really enjoyed helping Grandfather Tzu make breakfast and prepare the vegetables for different dishes throughout the day, and he mused to himself that maybe he would like to go into culinary someday. It was a lot more fun than he had ever thought it could be, and much more challenging than anything he’d done before. The sense of pride he felt when he made their typical fried rice for breakfast and actually got it perfectly right was something he’s never felt before, and it was a great feeling.

LuHan came downstairs one early summer morning, ready to begin to help make breakfast, but as he steeped down into the kitchen there was no one there. Confusion crossed his face for a moment and he made his way into the dining room to see Mrs. Luo and Grandpa Tzu speaking with Vinson. It seemed to be a bit of a private conversation and typically LuHan avoided anything to do with the other young man, so he stepped back into the kitchen to be able to listen without being seen.

“… want anything while we’re out?” Mrs. Luo’s voice was a bit weary already as if she really just wanted to go back to bed, and Vinson’s replied in a cheery voice.

“No, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. You two go and have fun; I’ll be fine! You need to catch the bus already.”

“Are you sure you can’t come with us? You always loved the festival, and we could pay the extra charges for your chair, don’t worry about that!”

“Mom. I’m fine, seriously. I am twenty two years old, I can miss a summer festival. Go! Have fun! Grandpa, please get her out the door, you’re going to miss the bus!” Vinson’s voice was happy and laughing, but LuHan thought he heard something much deeper in the fake cheeriness, and as the door closed he leaned around the edge of the kitchen doorway in time to see the smile fall off of the other man’s face. It was replaced by a look of pain mixed with anger, and Vinson gave a quiet curse as he ran his hands on the arms of his wheelchair. LuHan felt a pang of guilt run through him; he was the reason Vinson was stuck in the chair and the reason that Vinson couldn’t go enjoy time with his family.

Moving quietly through the abandoned kitchen, LuHan headed back up the stairs to his small bedroom. Closing the door quietly behind him, he leaned against the door and let out the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. Looking at the calendar he’d hung on the wall during his first week here, he noticed for the first time that today was the first official day of summer; there would be festivals all around the city and that was surely where the older two were headed today; most businesses were closed for the holiday. With a heavy sigh LuHan crossed the room to sit on his bed, fighting back the feeling of despair as he wondered what he’d be doing right now if he had never gotten into that car. What the Luo’s would be doing. Would Vinson and Jimmy be taking turns at the festival games, spending a day pretending they weren’t grown men and acting like boys once again?

Tears formed in LuHan’s eyes and he shook his head roughly, trying to knock those thoughts out of his head. He spent most of his time working and didn’t have a lot of time to sit and think, and suddenly he was unsure what to do. Without a cell phone, a book, a computer… how was he supposed to distract himself from those thoughts that threatened to cloak him in guilt?

He was no longer lying to himself; he took responsibility for Jimmy’s death, if only to himself. He couldn’t just outright say, ‘I’m sorry I killed your son’… that wasn’t the kind of thing he could bring himself to do and though most of him knew that Mrs. Luo would forgive him, there was the small part of him that said he didn’t deserve forgiveness and no one in their right mind would give it to him. With a heavy sigh he fell backward on his bed, losing his eyes to escape from the depressing thoughts and soon slipping off to sleep.

When he awoke the clock read just after one pm, and his stomach was painfully empty. He could no longer avoid Vinson, and besides, maybe the other two were back now. He stood and made his way downstairs to the kitchen, a bit of disappointment surprising him when he realized that they were still gone. He poked his head into the dining room, drawing back when he saw Vinson sitting there at his computer with paperwork strewn all over the table in front of him. Glancing around the kitchen, LuHan made his way to the refrigerator and took a butter roll from it. As he leaned against the counter to eat it, his eyes fell on the ramp leading down into the Luo’s basement home. He paused for a moment in thought, his eyes flickering toward the dining room before he made up his mind and quickly moved down the