Day 86

 

The first thing that Dara saw the moment her eyes fluttered open was Jiyong’s face a few inches from her. Her eyes immediately widened, making her more alert and awake. Jiyong was sleeping softly. Between them was his hand on top of hers. It was then that she realized that once again, Jiyong ditched his own comfortable and soft bed to sleep beside her on the floor.

 

Gently, she tried to pull her hand under his, careful not to wake him up. When she was successful, she sat up, not tearing her eyes off Jiyong. She took note of how tired he looked like. There were dark circles around his eyes, now visible without the entire fancy make up celebrities wear, even him. His hair was disheveled, with some hairspray dried up stuck on them. He wasn’t able to take a shower when they got home as both of them were too tired to even change their clothes.

 

Her hand reached out to him without much thought. The tip of her fingers made contact with his face, tracing the scowl on his forehead. She chuckled how even when he was asleep, he still looked mad. She then traced his high-bridged nose, until his fingers stopped just right on his lips. She pulled her hand back and looked away.

 

Her hand was clutched on her chest where her heart was. It was beating hard, as if wanting to jump out of her chest. She looked back at him, who was still sleeping and clueless of her conflicted heart.

 

“What’s going on?” she whispered. Faster than light, she picked up her phone and got out of the room.

 

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

 

“Are you awake?” was Dara’s text to TOP. And it didn’t reach a minute for him to reply.

 

TOP: I am. Any problem? I’m calling you.

 

Her phone started to ring and her eyes widened, scared that Jiyong would wake up from her phone. She answered it and ran to his room, leaning her ear on the door and was relieved to hear his soft snores.

 

“Why are you awake at this hour?” TOP’s deep voice came.

 

“I don’t know. I suddenly woke up,” Dara said, whispering. “I should be the one asking you that question though. You should rest while you can.”

 

TOP scoffed on the other line. “You’re telling me to do that when you were the one who texted and asked me if I was awake. Why are you whispering though? Is Jiyong still asleep?”

 

“Yes. I’m under the table in the kitchen right now. I’m afraid he’ll wake up with my voice so I had to whisper.”

 

“You’re under the table?!” TOP asked and laughed. He got up and sat at the edge of his bed. Truthfully, he woke up from the sound of his phone. He was too sensitive that even the slightest sound around could wake him up. “Now, tell me, what’s wrong? Did anything happen?”

 

“Nothing much…” she paused, thinking whether to tell him her worries. But she already had bothered him enough so she should just go with it. “Actually, I met my ex-boyfriend tonight.”

 

“Oh? You did?” he asked, wondering who it was as she hadn’t told him she had a past love. He also wondered who it was because as far as he remembered, she was tagged along Jiyong tonight during SBS Gayo Daejun.

 

“Yes. And something happened.”

 

“And that is?”

 

“He forced himself on me. He tried kissing me.”

 

Suddenly, TOP stood up, feeling alert and angry. Even though he didn’t have any feelings towards her except for being close friends, he wanted to protect her. He had already mentioned to Jiyong that he sees her as his sister. Besides, she just looked so fragile and weak that anyone would just want to protect her.

 

“Who is he? Did he hurt you? Tell me his name,” TOP said, a little too loud that Dara leaned her phone away from her ear.

 

“TOP, don’t worry. I’m fine. Actually, I…” she paused, thinking if she was going to tell him what was bothering her. “I’m bothered of something else.”

 

TOP stayed silent and was relieved that Dara was fine even after what she told him.

 

“Jiyong is acting strange.”

 

“Strange in what way?” TOP asked.

 

“He’s not treating me the way he did before. Like, waaaay before, he’s rude and mean and a jerk. And then, we became friends and he treats me well. But now, it changed to something… like… you know…”

 

“What?” TOP pushed.

 

“You know… we’re like a cou—like, he likes—like you know…”

 

“Dara, you realize that you’re not making sense, don’t you?”

 

Dara buried her face between her knees and groaned under her breath. “I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I’m hanging up, TOP.”

 

“Are you sure about that, Dara? Once you hang up, you know very well you won’t be able to let those things which are bothering you out of you. You won’t have a chance. And the most possible scenario is that you’ll be weary and you’ll be bothered more of it but you wouldn’t have anyone to talk it with… except Jiyong.”

 

“Aish, idiot!” Dara said, groaning again. “Alright, I’ll tell you.”

 

TOP smiled to himself, having an idea of what was troubling her.

 

“He’s doing things as if he’s protecting me, as if I was someone important to him, as if he can’t be without me,” she said. “He’s been acting sweet towards me; as if I was his…” she paused to swallow a lump forming in . “As if I was his girlfriend.

 

“And just recently, he once again protected me against that ex I told you about who forced to kiss me. He punched the guy across his face yelling at him that he didn’t have the right to lay a finger on me. He even called me ‘his girl’. He stayed with me after that as I tried to calm myself down, assuring me that everything’s alright, that he would always be by my side, that he would be holding my hand if I needed someone to keep me company. And he did.

 

“You know what’s worse, though? Tonight, I was crying after the incident because I was bothered less because of the actual incident but more because of the fact that he had been with me all throughout but the only thing I gave him was the service I promised him on our one-hundred day contract. And after two weeks, I am going to part with him and I don’t know what to do, how I will be after two weeks, how I will feel waking up, how I will be facing each day not making breakfast for someone, not preparing the bed for someone before bedtime. I hate this feeling. I don’t know exactly what it is but I think I just got used to him being around that is causing all of these conflicted feelings within me,” she paused again, hugging her legs towards her. “I’m confused… and lonely.”

 

On the other line, TOP had a fatherly smile as if he just witnessed his daughter mature a bit more. “You know what, Dara? From the way you related your story, I can see how much Jiyong had affected your life even with just the short span of three months. But I can’t help you with any of this, Dara.”

 

Dara frowned and pouted. “But, TOP…” she whined a little. She called him because she believed he could help her but what did she get after relating everything she had bottled up for days? That he can’t help her?

 

“You know I know someone who said this: You don’t need someone else to tell you what you feel towards someone else. You got that?”

 

Dara’s brows furrowed with her eyes casted down. She tried absorbing what he said even though it was just one sentence. Both of them stayed silent.

 

Then, does that mean I really have feelings for him? She thought. She didn’t know the answer… rather, she refused to answer it. She was afraid of what the answer was, of the possible answer she had in her mind right now.

 

“What are you doing there?” a voice entered her ears. She looked up from under the table and her eyes widened.

 

“Uhhh, Jiyong, what are you doing awake this early?”

 

Jiyong’s hair was still disheveled, bed marks still visible on the side of his face, and his voice was a bit hoarse. It was evident he just woke up, though she was worrying if he had heard anything before he showed up in front of her.

 

Dara immediately got out from under the table, a little panicky to the point she bumped her head to the edge of the table but she acted fine. When she was completely out, she hid the phone behind her.

 

“What’s that behind you?” Jiyong asked; his brows are furrowed together.

 

“Nothing. My hand is behind me,” she said and then awkwardly laughed.

 

But Jiyong stepped forward and grabbed her hand behind her and looked at her phone screen where TOP’s name was flashed.

 

“You were talking to TOP-hyung?” Jiyong hissed.

 

“Err, yeah. And I was just hanging up,” Dara said, trying to hang the call up but Jiyong snatched the phone away.

 

He put it on his ear. “What are you and Dara talking about?”

 

“Oh, Jiyong! Good morning,” he greeted a little too enthusiastically. “We were just talking about what happened last night.”

 

Jiyong eyed Dara on the side. “What about last night?”

 

“Oh, you know, how she cried and how she felt upset about—“

 

“TOP-hyung, stop it with acting as if you’re her superhero! Hang up now!” he shouted but hung up the call himself. He then turned to Dara with a glare on his eyes. “And you…”

 

“Err, Jiyong?” Dara called out, but stepped back as Jiyong was stepping closer. He didn’t take his eyes off her, making Dara cower in fear, until she felt the edge of the kitchen counter on her back.

 

Jiyong rested his hands on both of her sides as his face went closer to hers, stopping just an inch away.

 

“Jiyong?” Dara called out, her head leaned away, not meeting his gaze. Her heart was already thumping hard on her chest and meeting his gaze would probably make it jump out of her chest.

 

Jiyong breathed out. Instead of saying anything, he leaned his head on her shoulder and sighed once more. “I’m hurt.”

 

Dara looked shocked. She looked to her side and wondered what he was talking about.

 

“Was my company not enough? Didn’t you feel comforted last night with my company? I stayed with you the whole night, didn’t I? I held your hand, didn’t I? Why wasn’t it enough then? Why am I not enough then?”

 

“Jiyong…”

 

“Do you really like TOP that much that you need to sneak out at dawn to talk to him?”

 

“Jiyong…” she tried once again. She wanted to struggle free but his head was still on her shoulder.

 

“Am I nothing to you?”

 

That made her stop. She just stared at the side of his head and realized that in every word he had uttered, there was pain coated in them, that he was truly hurt.

 

“Don’t I mean anything to you?”

 

Dara sighed as well. She swallowed the lump in . Her free hand started rising, planning to pat his back, planning to comfort him, planning to tell him it was otherwise, that he was important to her as well, that all she needed last night was his company. However, her hand stopped midway, with all of her thoughts stirring inside her mind mainly asking for the reason why he was acting like this, why he was acting hurt, why he was acting pathetic, why he was acting… jealous.

 

Her hand dropped to her side once more as she looked away, listening to his steady breathing and just letting him stay on his spot, not minding to ask him to budge from it.

 

We don’t have many days left together, Jiyong. Instead of giving me those times to understand what the hell is happening between us, you act like this. You’re making it harder for me, she thought. You’re making it harder for me to leave you. When at the start of our contract I wanted to immediately get out of this mess, you’re giving me more reasons to want to stay.

 

Dara gave a quiet sigh as they stayed at that spot for a while more.

 

 

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HI! sorry sorry sorry that it takes me long to update this fanfic. huhuhu.

THANK YOU TO ALL THE SUBSCRIBERS! THANK YOU TO MY SISTER FOR THE POSTER! (I had to push her to make me one though LOL)