Jun-hyung’s Point of View

 

           What happened last night that my head hurts so much this morning? Why can’t I move my arm? I try to pull the covers over my half body, but the strange thing is there are no covers to be pulled. I open my eyes slightly and it takes a few minutes to adjust to the light. I see the reason I can’t move my arms and I smile.

           “Good-morning.” I say looking into her eyes.

           “Good-morning,” she whispers against my lips. I close the small gap between us and kiss her as hard as I can. She is smiling against my lips and I hold her closer. I pull back before I get too carried away.

           “What happened last night?” I ask and her smile just broadens. We didn’t, no we didn’t…did we?

           “Well…” she said, looking at the pillow behind my head. Pulling herself onto my chest she kisses me and I kiss her back. Her lips taste like soju.

           “Aren’t you going to tell me?” I ask.

           “You kissed me goodnight and then you went into the kitchen to grab a drink...”

 

~ Flashback ~

 

            I kiss her goodnight and am about to walk her back to her hotel, but she doesn’t let go of me. She only hugs me tighter. I put my head in the crook of her neck and let a tear fall onto her back.

            “Why are you crying?” She asks patting my back.

            “I’m just…I’m just so…” I couldn’t finish my sentence for fear of jinxing whatever this was that allowed us to be together after two years.

            “Just so what?” She asks as I lift my head and push her into the fridge. I lean my lips onto hers and she puts her hands around my neck. I pull back when she starts leaning into me like she meant business. I hold her in my arms and she bites her lower lip.

            “I need a drink.” I say as I open the fridge behind her and grab a bottle of soju off the top shelf. Setting my glass on the table I motion for her to sit opposite me. She takes her seat and I can tell she wants some as well, so I grab another glass from the sink before sitting down and pouring two glasses of the poison.

            “Thanks,” she says as we tap our glasses together. She downs hers as I down mine. She wants another glass so I pour a second round for the both of us and she doesn’t even wait for me to lift my glass before she just downs it.

            “In a hurry?” I ask a bit sarcastically. She grins at me and I just pour her a third glass. Once again she knocks back the glass before I have the time to lift my own.

            “Are you thirsty? I can get you some water or something.” I ask remembering what the fortuneteller said.

            “I’m good. I just wanted to reach my limit before I keep drinking, get too drunk and ask for more.” She says as she turns her glass upside down on the table and her lips. I pour myself a third glass and drink it pretty quickly.

            “What are you thinking about?” I asked when I saw her staring into space.

            “Not leaping over this table and jumping you.” She said. She had a glint in her eye. I pick up the bottle of soju and start gulping it down until it’s gone. She only laughs at me. In the time it took her to stand I was around the table and holding her in my arms. She grabs the collar of my shirt and hikes her leg up on my hip. I hold her in this position and let my lips hover over hers for a minute. Our smiles are gone and we are both completely serious now.

            “How about I take the initiative?” I ask as she grabs my neck and holds me in such a way that I wouldn’t dream of escaping. She her lips and the tip of her tongue graces my lower lip. I shudder before I hear her speak.

            “You can do whatever you want,” she whispers as I kiss her. After a minute or two she pulls away and leads me to my bedroom like she knows the way. She sits on the edge of the bed and crosses her legs in a very swift and y manner.

            “I can do whatever I want,” I repeat. I attack her and she laughs at my actions. I smile into the crook of her neck as she wraps her legs around my lower half. I take my time pulling down the straps of her dress and she just touches my chest. I pull away and remove my shirt. From the time it took me to pull away and remove my shirt something happened. I felt my head spinning as my body fell forward. I passed out.

 

~ End of Flashback ~

 

            I smile down at her as she looks out the window. So we didn’t. That’s good. I love her but I don’t want to do anything before she is ready. But by the way she retold the story it seemed like she was ready or at least thought she was. I just can’t believe I was in such rush. It’s a damn good thing I passed out when I did.

            “Jun-hyung ah,” she whispers, calling me back to reality.

            “Mhm…” I didn’t say anything because I was curious.

            “What are you thinking about?” She asked as she rested her head on my chest and played with my hand. I was cold before I woke up, but now I was perfectly warm.

            “What did you do last night after I passed out?” I asked.

            “Well, I needed to get a glass of water.” She said. Oh no, what if she ran into one of the guys?

            “And?” I ask completely curious now.

            “I ran into Ki-kwang.” She said kissing the palm of my hand. She played with my pinky, folding and unfolding it.

            “Really?”

            “Yep. But don’t worry. He talked about how we used to be best friends, you know, before the accident. He is quite funny actually. I asked him to hang out with us later today, if that’s okay with you?” She asked.

            “That’s cool, he can hang out with us and OH MY GOD!” I scream.

            “What is it?” She asked.

            “Does Shin-hye know that you stayed the night here?” I ask in a complete panic.

            “Yea, I called her last night before I fell asleep.” She says grinning up at me.

            “What did she say?”

            “Just to be careful.”

            “Like something bad would happen to you here.” I say, internally frustrated.

            “I remembered something last night.” She said. WHAT? What did she remember that she waited until morning to tell me?

            “What is that?” I ask beaming. I was trying to mask my excitement, but it didn’t work out so well.

            “Excited much?” She asked me jokingly. “I remembered something about the first time we drank together. We drank at a bar that was really far from here. We were sitting on bar stools and you tried really hard to get drunk fast.” She laughed at her memory and I smiled encouragingly at her. She was correct so far and I didn’t want to say anything for fear of tripping her up.

            “You were stammering a lot and I had to ask you several times to repeat yourself. Except instead of repeating yourself you just leaned over to me, but you put too much weight on the side of your chair and you fell. I tried to catch you, but we both ended up on the floor.” She turned to face me. She was smiling, but it was a nervous smile. I cup her face with my hand and brush my thumb over her lips.

            “You did this then too.” She said kissing my thumb. “When you kissed me it surprised me because you weren’t one for public displays of affection. Then you told me…you told me that…you said you loved me.” She said looking down at her hand that was playing with the sheet. She was definitely nervous.

            “Is that all?” I asked.

            “Mhm…but was that the first time you said that to me?” I tilt her face to mine and kiss her forehead.

            “Yes.” She smiled. Knowing that it wasn’t a dream or some story she cooked up in her mind made her happy. She had finally remembered something about her old life.

            “That was the day that I stopped caring about public displays of affection.”

            “What made you not care anymore?” She asked.

            “The fact that I was brave enough to kiss you at all. We were slowly becoming friends at that point. I felt like if I didn’t make a move we would never move forward with each other.” I say pulling her to my lips. “I would never have gotten to tease you in all the ways I know you love.” I whisper against her lips before kissing her lightly. She smiles and I take it upon myself to explain a little further.

            “You want me to tell you why we like to hold each other so much?” I asked and she just nodded her head.

            “It’s because of the story of our first kiss.” I say as I lean my lips down to hers once again.

            “Hey guys, what are we doing today?” Ki-kwang asked bursting through the door. When he saw us he turned the most crimson shade of red.

            "Hi, Ki-kwang!" She said sitting up under the covers. She looked up at him and patted the spot next to her for him to sit. Exactly what did they talk about again?

            “I’ll go,” He said turning to leave. She stood up and rushed over to him.

            “Ki-kwang, you should stay.” She said grabbing his hand and pulling him to the bed. Taking her place next to me, Ki-kwang smiles and sits on the edge of the bed.

            “What are we doing today?” He asked again.

            “Can we go to your studio?” She asked very much excited. She had never wanted to go before now.

            “Are you sure? You never wanted to go. You were always afraid to go with me.” I say, trying to understand her.

            “That was then, this is now.” She simply states.

            “Yea, what’s so wrong with her coming to the studio? You used to beg her to come with us.”

            “I’ll be right back,” she said getting up and heading to the bathroom.

            “What happened between you two last night?” I ask as soon as I am sure she can’t hear us talking.

            “We just talked about how close we used to be. Why is that important to you?” He asked.

            “I just want to make sure nothing else happened.”

            “Why? Can’t you trust her?”

            “Of course I can.”

            “So are you saying you can’t trust me?”

            “No, I just wanted to make sure nothing else happened last night.”

            “Nothing did.”

            “I’m back!” She said entering the room dressed and ready to leave. “Go get dressed Jun-hyung.” She said smiling at me as she leaves the room with Ki-kwang. My best friend and the love of my life just left the room together.

            “I’ll be out in a minute, so don’t go anywhere.”

            “Don’t worry, we’ll be waiting for you.” She said as she closed the door behind them. I dressed as quickly as I could without tripping on anything. Although I did almost break my neck a couple of times running back and forth between the closet and my bed. I walk out into the living room and she is sitting on the couch, but Ki-kwang is nowhere in sight.

            “Where did he go?” I ask.

            “He thought we could use a moment alone since he interrupted us this morning.” She says patting the couch to the left of her. I take my seat and she sits in my lap resting her head on my shoulder. She has definitely changed. Never had she voluntarily sat in my lap. But I wasn’t going to argue.

            “That was good of him.” I say as I lightly press my lips to hers. She pulls herself closer to me and I hold her waist. After a minute she pulls away and winces.

            “Are you okay?”

            “Yes, I’ve just had a little headache since last night.”

            “We should stay in then. You need to rest.”

            “No, I want to go the your studio.” She said standing and dragging me down the stairs.

            “Ready?” Ki-kwang asked as we emerged from the building holding hands.

            “Yes.” She said linking arms with him as well. We walked the ten blocks to the studio and as soon as we got there I had to go to the bathroom.

            “I’m going inside for a moment. Don’t come inside until I come to get you, okay?” I said.

            “I’ll wait right here with Ki-kwang,” she said.

            “Be right back.” I say as I kiss her forehead and go inside. In the rush to leave I forgot I had to go to the bathroom. I walk in the door and take an immediate left to the bathrooms. Entering the one with the blue door I take care of my business and exit.

            I open the all glass door to go back outside, where she is nowhere in sight and Ki-kwang is calling her name.

            “What happened? Where did she go?” I ask.

            “I asked if she wanted to sit and as soon as she saw the bench she collapsed and when she stood back up she ran off. I have no idea where she went, but she took off that way.” He said. I knew what was happening. I ran straight for Shin-hye’s hotel room and knocked on the door as loud as I could.

            “What?” She screamed as she opened the door.

            “Where is she? I know she’s here!”

            “What are you talking about?”

            “She ran off and I think she came to see you, you two are like sisters.” I must look worried because she offers me something to drink.

            “I don’t want water, I want my girl back.”

            “Let me ask you one thing.”

            “What?” I ask, spinning around.

            “What was your favorite thing about her before she left?” She asked, looking even more serious than before.

            “Her eyes. But what does that have to do with anything?”

            “I knew it. You want to know why I really don’t like you?”

            “Why is that important right now?”

            “A while after she started having her dreams and calling your name in her sleep we went to one of your concerts.” She said as I was walking out the door. I stopped in my tracks and turned to face her. She nodded her head.

            “A year after her accident, we went to one of your concerts. She wore a facemask because you wore one. She kept telling me she thought she knew you from a previous life.”            

            “Why are you telling me this?”

            “Because, your favorite thing was her eyes and when that’s all you saw, you couldn’t recognize her. When she was asleep she always had a nightmare and when she would wake up she was screaming your name. She knew who you were to her while she was asleep. But when all you saw was her eyes, you treated her like anyone else.”

            “I was depressed. I must not have looked properly.”

            “You stared into every girls eyes. I think you were looking for her, but you couldn’t see the love of your life when she was standing right in front of you.”

            “I’m going to go find her.” I say as I leave the hotel. Was all that true? Did I really not see her when she was standing right in front of me?