When Nichkhun opened his eyes it felt like it hadn’t been more than five minutes since Chansung had carried him to bed. He had been dreaming about something, and even though he couldn’t remember what his dream was about, his mind felt troubled when he woke up. It was probably something about this mess he had entangled himself in. Victoria had been right, he had been digging too much, and now, if he made one wrong move, it would be the end for him and everyone he cared about. How he wished to be able to go home, crawl into Minjun’s lap and tell him everything, maybe even cry some, but he knew he couldn’t do that.

Looking at the cloths he was wearing he realized he didn’t have anything else to wear. He made his way into the closet and looked through the cloths hanging there. It was mostly the same type of black suites and white shirts. In the back of the closet he found drawers full of sweatpants, t-shirts and hoodies. Nichkhun was sure Chansung didn’t mind him taking a pair, seeing he had about 20 of each.

When he looked at himself in the mirror he looked like a ten year older version of himself, it felt like weeks since he last took a shower. As the water fell down his body it felt like it was washing away all his worries; only to be replaced by new ones when he dried up. There seemed to be no way out of this mess. Sure, he and Chansung where going to “runaway” or whatever, but how far would they come before they catched up with them? And was Chansung going to stay with him after they found a place or was he going to leave him and go back to being a killer? At this point he had no other choice then to trust Chansung, but when the time was right he might have to come up with a backup plan for himself. The warm water running down his body did nothing to distract his mind.

As he was drying himself his mind turned to Chansung’s friends. Taecyeon and Junho seemed nice, and it looked like Chansung trusted them, at least he thought so. Telling them about him being alive was a huge sign of trust, knowing that if the rest of this Company thingy were to know they would both be killed. But Nichkhun wasn’t so sure leaving him with Junho was the best of ideas. He looked like a cute little kid, with those big round eyes and dazzling smile, but he was a killer. An assassin. He was trained to kill people off quietly and he knew probably a million different ways to do it. And he had pushed Chansung away like he was a little kid yesterday. Spending some alone time with him was not on Nichkhun’s list of top choices on how to spend your day. Then again, that list was very limited at the moment. He decided he could do some exploring before Junho showed up. Seeing that this was a relatively small apartment it shouldn’t take long, but at least it was a distraction.

His little adventure tour around the apartment didn’t give him much. He had pretty much seen it all during the tour Chansung had given him the day before. He had managed to turn the TV on and he found an iPod connected to the TV so now he could at least listen to some music. It seemed that Chansung only listened to classical music, which he didn’t find that surprising. He gave a small laugh when he found a playlist named; Music Junho likes to shake his to. Probably something there that was more like Nichkhun’s taste. He pressed play and SNSD’s Genie started playing. Giving a small shout of excitement he jumped up and started dancing to it, perfectly in sync with how the girls performs it. How he had the time to learn the dances to the songs he likes is a mystery, even to himself. But whenever he had found himself with some free time, either stuck on the case or even tired of studying when he was still in school, he had taken his mind of all the things troubling him and learned the dance to whatever was his favourite song at that time. Seeing that he was always stuck with this last case he had learned a lot of dance moves.

Junho arrived through the door as Nichkhun was making some coffee. Of course Nichkhun never heard or saw him coming through the door, the volume at max and dancing his off to BoA’s Eat You Up, singing at the top of his lounges.

“I’ll eat you up your love your looooooove!” Junho stopped just inside the door and looked at the sight that was Nichkhun. He might not be someone who stood out in the crowd, neither in the looks or height department (sorry, just Junho’s personal taste, he liked tall guys) but he sure new how to dance. Junho found himself being a bit impressed by the dancing skills of the Thai, he wasn’t on the same level as Junho of course, but it was not too bad. And boy, could he sing! He felt a bit smitten by the way Nichkhun totally let go and danced like he didn’t care about a thing and that wonderful voice was like a sweet cherry on top of the dessert. He just couldn’t help himself, he had to join him. Slowly he put the bags in his hands down and started to creep towards the man now dancing in the middle of the floor with his hands in the air.

“Can’t stop thinking about the things I wanna do to yoooou. If you move any closer you’d be asking for it toooooo. I want your…” At that moment Junho put his hands on Nichkhun’s hips and started to move with him and half sang half whispered in his ear.

“I need your touch, so much I think I’m in love” At first Nichkhun froze and stood completely still, which was a complete valid thing to do when a trained killer suddenly starts grinding and whispering in your ear. But Junho gave him a dazzling smile, and at that moment he reminded him too much of Minjun for him to be afraid of him. He returned the smile, and they danced together until the song ended. Before Nichkhun could stop the player Super Junior’s Super Girl started playing and he couldn’t not dance to that once it started playing.

After 5 more songs both of them fell to floor out of breath and smiling from ear to ear.

“Man,” Junho turned to Nichkhun once his breath was starting to come back to normal. “You really know how to shake that of yours. With some training you might even be as good as me. Well, not just as good, but right below you know.” He laughed and gave him a playful punch on the arm.

“You are at least better than Taecyeon, he has too long feet and doesn’t know how to use them properly. It’s just dumb luck he hasn’t tripped in them and killed himself yet.” They were quiet for a few minutes.

“What about Chansung?” Nichkhun was playing with the end of his sleeve instead of looking at Junho as he asked the question.

“What about him?”

“How are my dancing skills compared to him?”

Junho shrugged his shoulders as he got off the floor and started walking towards the coffee machine. “He doesn’t dance, I’ve never seen him do it. Did you make coffee?”

“Yeah,” Nichkhun answered absently as he too got off the floor. “It should be done by now”

When they were both seated on the couch, each with a coffee cup in their hand, Nichkhun finally asked: “What’s he like? I mean, like a person and a friend, not an assassin?”

It was something he was really curious about. He had met Chansung the assassin, with the cold calculating and determined look on his face only once, but he had also seen glimpses of another Chansung underneath, small cracks in the foundation that gave out hints of the man he really was. Whenever he thought of Chansung it was always that version that first came to his mind. The second thing that came to mind was how it felt to have his lips pressed against his and their bodies tuggled together, his tongue slowly asking for permission to enter his mouth and… Nope! Not going there. No way. Think of old ladies and dead plants. He forced himself to focus on Junho who hadn’t said a thing yet.

“It’s okay. You don’t have to answer, I understand if it’s too personal.” Nichkhun pressed the warm cup closer between his hands, seeking the warmth.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just very hard to answer.” Junho sighed and took a sip of the cup. “Chansung he is…. Well, he is not a very personal person. By that I mean he doesn’t give much of himself, or show much of who he really is with others. Not even to those closest to him.” The playful twinkle in his eyes was gone and a more grim look was now on his face. “I told you yesterday that me, Chansung and Jay used to talk about our time before the Company, when it really was just me and Jay who talked about that. Sure, Chansung talked about how it was in the pits before Boss came and picked him up, but nothing about what happened before that. I’ve known him for 6 years or more now, and I still don’t know about where he grew up, nothing about his family, nothing. It was kind of frustrating at first but that man grows on you no matter what. He is honest; if you ask him a question you can trust him to answer it truthfully. And the best part is he is loyal, he will do all in his power to protect those closest to him, and that is where the lines are crossed between his personal life and his work. Not that he has that much of a personal life. This job, this life, is or was his reason for being. Boss showed up and gave him a purpose and a reason to continue living, and it gave him a sense of family and home. His loyalty to our job is bound to him feeling he is making a difference, helping people. You have to understand we don’t look at what we do as killing; we are making it better for people so they don’t have to do the hard decisions themselves, like faceless heroes. But now, with you, things have been flipped upside down for him. His home has become something fake, and I think he has a lot of thinking to. He is the kind of person who rethinks everything if he finds something is wrong. Now he will rethink every target, weighing every decision he’s ever made to see if he should have done it differently. We are taught to kill without hesitation, to show no remorse, to just kill target after target without letting the action of taking a life weigh you down. This is impossible unless you are a complete maniac, and trust me, we have many maniacs in our unit, but me and Chansung, we’re no maniacs. We, and Jay, learned how to conceal our feelings, to make it seem like we were unaffected by killing our friends, who by that time felt like family. Chansung had already learned that before he came here, why, I don’t know. I’m sorry, I’m rattling on, does any of this make any sense?” Nichkhun was quiet for some time before he responded, actually long enough for Junho to refill their cups who was now empty. “Take your time, I know it’s a lot to process.”

“Yeah,” Nichkhun drew his hands threw his hair. “So, he doesn’t really have a personality at all, and he was like this before he joined the Company?”

“Well, I used to think that he just didn’t trust anyone enough to show who he is, you know, really is. But now, with things changing in the Company, it’s kind of forced him to figure out his life. Had your case come up last year, he wouldn’t even have blinked before he killed you.” Nichkhuns throat thickened as Junho said this with a stone cold face. “He wouldn’t have spent 4 weeks doing his own surveillance to make sure that you really were a bad guy. It’s not just your case that’s been off, and it’s a combination of all those other cases and you, Nichkhun, that’s made Chansung throw away all he knows away and just go with his gut. I think you remind him of himself in a way, that’s just my guess. You don’t have any family either, your father killed in action and your mother killing herself, two very tragic ways to lose someone. And whatever happened to Chansung in the past was something so tragic and traumatizing he can’t even start to open up and deal with it.”

They sat in silence for what felt like hours. All these thoughts were swimming around in Nichkhun’s head. Yeah, he understood Chansungs need to keep himself closed up about his family. Yes, he’d lost most of his family, but not all of it. Had he not had Minjun in his life he probably would have been just as closed off as Chansung or worse. But he wasn’t interesting in trying to understand or fix the man that was going to help him run away, he just wanted to know if he could trust him. And from what Junho now had told him it looked like he could. He had major issues, but he had just flipped his own world upside down to save Nichkhun, the least he could do was try to trust him. The silence continued for a few more minutes before Junho broke it.

“You know, I’d never seen Chansung smile until like 5 days ago.” There was a small smile on the man’s face as he said it. “His perfect little box that he has put all his emotions and himself in is starting to crack. Those who doesn’t know Chansung well says he has no personality, he’s just a perfect emotionless assassin. That’s not true. We who are closest to him has learned to read him, because he do slip up sometimes. Now, with everything changing around he himself has to change, and that scares him. And I think you scare him.” He reached out and put a hand over Nichkhun’s.

“I’m telling you this so you’ll understand him better, and trust him. And if you can’t trust him, then at least trust that he save you from this mess you have found yourself in.”

“I think I can manage that.” Junho gave Nichkhun a smile, which he returned.

Junho removed his hand and cleared his throat. He stood up and made his way towards the kitchen area.

“Hungry?” He asked the question without looking at Nichkhun.

“Yes, I haven’t had any breakfast yet.”

“Good, me neither. Now I know you already think I’m the best cook ever after our dinner yesterday,” He turned to give him a dazzling smile that made Nichkhuns stomach turn. He was sure that Junho and Minjun had to be related somehow, there were too many similarities. “After this breakfast you will know for sure that I’m not only the best cook in the country, but the best cook in the world.”

Nichkhun returned the smile and took a sip from his cup. The coffee was cold, but he didn’t mind, he’d always liked cold coffee. His mind drifted to his new insight on his kidnapper/saviour/object of desire or whatever Chansung was now beginning to become. He had no doubt he could trust him, he just didn’t understand why. Why had he immediately felt comfortable with Chansung as he had awoken and thought he was going to be killed? Why had he dreamt about kissing him? And why did every touch give him butterflies in the stomach? Things had definitely taken a more positive turn from when he woke up yesterday and thought he was a dead man, and he was safe. He felt safe. Not only with Chansung, but also with Junho. And that was weird since up until he had met them his only friend had been Minjun. Now here he was, with two, possibly three, new friends who were trained killers. (Well, not Taecyeon according to himself, but Nichkhun was sure he knew his way around more weapons than the regular surveillance working people of the world) So, yes, things had taken a positive and weird turn, and a man who were first trying to kill him was now going to save him. If he ever saw Minjun again he would have to write a song about this. 

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Hey! *trying to act like nothing is wrong with me showing up with a new chapter nearly 2 years later*

As I have pointed out on several ocations, I'm the worst writer ever..... But I found two sentence for chapter 9 on my computer today, and decided that it was about time a new chapter was given to all of you!  There really isn't a good explanation as to why it took me so long... I kinda fell out of the kpop and the fandom and then came slightly back, and then fell out again, and now I'm slightly back again! I wont make promises I can't keep, so I'm not gonna promise to update on a regular basis, but I do promise that I will try with all my might to not let it go 2 years between chapters, ever again!

This shamefull writer will try to write more tomorrow (have to get up early for work) but for now I'm happy that I finally was abel to write nearly 3000 words in one night on a story that I haven't touched in nearly 2 years, so I'm hopeful for the future of this fic! 

Love all of you ~~<3~~