The next day, it feels as if you awoke from a dream. The memories from last midnight come flowing back to you and you feel an ache in your heart. It's past noon already, crying makes you really tired. Without even looking, you reach over with your hand and grab your phone. And you turn it off. You can't stand hearing it ring again. Those last few words repeat over and over in your head.

Go home. Please.

He had wanted you to leave. Wanted you to leave him alone and stay away. You feel another sting in your heart.

You spend all day packing. Constantly moving around and finding more chores to do. It's a steady way to keep yourself distracted. But when it came to meals and taking a shower, etc., it did no good. Your mind would wander. Back to your first kiss--your very first kiss-- with not only the man you love, but with the idol, Huang Zi Tao. Not only an idol, your first and absolute bias.

It had been beautiful. And devastating. 

You also keep your phone off all day. It's probably not the best idea since it IS your last day here. But to hear that vibration, that ring, again? You'd only be reminded of the days where Tao called and texted you constantly and you two met up so often. You feel tired, almost numb. There's a reason to be happy. Tao had kissed you. Had held you. But it is your last day here. You're going to leave tomorrow. And you're going to leave behind your one true love.

It's like leaving half of you here, in China.

You go to bed early, unable to stay up any longer. Your grandparents try not to leet you see that they notice your behavior. They gladly accept that you want to sleep early, saying that it's best to get as much rest as possible before the early flight the next morning. You just nod back with a small smile. 

It's only 7:45 PM (according to the clock in your room). You've never slept this early. Never had to. There's still some light streaming in through the windows. You pause for a second, looking up at the ceiling. Then you turn on your computer. 

It's only fair. Not only did you find love here, but you also found friends. And good ones, at that. You email May a quick goodbye, telling her that you'll keep in contact and that you'll never forget her (of course). You email Yixing the same, and also said to say goodbye to the other members too. You would not be seeing them tomorrow.

8:15 PM. Time did not pass fast enough.

You wake up the next morning feeling alert. You're surprised that you manage to wake up at all since you left your phone off yesterday and you had intended to set an alarm. You take a hot shower to calm your nerves and try to get fresh and clean. You put on your "airport fashion", which isn't much but it's enough for you. You have your suitcase and backpack, and you're standing by the door. 

Your grandparents stand in front of you, crying. "Don't be sad," you say. "There's been too much crying lately already." You try to give them a joking smile. Your grandmother manages to smile back.

"You must visit again. Soon."

"As soon as I can." You hug them both. "I'm going to miss you two so much." You say, on the verge of tears. You fight back the urge to cry, there really has been too much crying lately.

"And we're going to miss you as well. So, so, so much." One last hug, and it's time for you to go. You give them a last wave. And then you make your way down the apartment complex. When you get outside, you call for a taxi. The taxi driver helps you load your suitcase into the trunk, and you take one last look at the apartment building.

"Thank you," you whisper to it.

You climb into the taxi. "Airport, please." And then you're off.

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Here you are, at that airport. The place where your very-recent nightmare occured. You look to your left. Parents saying goodbye to their children with tears in their eyes. You look to your right. Friends hugging and waving. But you're here alone. And no one's here to tell you goodbye.

You start to walk forward. You're about to leave this place. But you're stopped by a hand on your arm. The person behind you says your name. You would recognize that voice anywhere. You slowly turn around, and there he is, with his hand on your arm. You face him, once again on the verge of crying. You can't help it, you hug him.

"I'm going to miss you the most." You whisper to him. He hugs you back and chuckles.

"Me too." You breathe in his scent as you two hug, which seems like an eternity. But you're the one to pull away. You two stand there, looking at each other for the last time and you take in his features.

His maroon colored, dyed hair. His sharp, coal black eyes, with the dark circles underneath. His several ear piercings. His tall stature and figure. His voice. His thin waist. His bony fingers. His everything.

You give him one last smile. One last goodbye. And you turn around. And you leave.

And you walk through those doors.

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Sitting down on those airplane seats never gave you a good feeling. You hate the loud noise, the cold air, your ears popping. 

It's in the middle of the flight that you find yourself hungry. You remember the snacks your grandparents had packed for you (your heart aches at the memory of them and their home) and you reach for your back pack to get them. It's then that you notice something.

That peculiar pocket that you never used, the one for holding water bottles. It's not empty. There's a flash of white. You put your hand in the pocket, and pull out the crumple of paper.

No way... you think to yourself. You pull out the note. The note that was resting in the very same pocket the first note was in. A wave of nostalgia passes over you.

Don't you dare ever forget me. Always email and call

-TAO

His handwriting is really messy. But you give him credit. He had scrawled the note in English. You clutch the note and hold it up to your heart for a second. And then you slip it into your pocket.

It's a long ride back home.