You miss him. It's fairly obvious, and you don't know what to do. Your experiences with "love" wasn't exactly...serious. You had your hand full of crushes from time to time, but mostly you just watched your friends fall in love around you. And you usually thought about it, wondering why it never happened to you.

Well...until now.

He's gorgeous. He's the most hard-working person you know. He's insanely talented, athletic, a little scary almost, but adorable at the same time. There was so many ways to describe him, yet no words for it. He is strong, but weak too. He is everything. To you.

It's one of those moments where you blank out. Utterly and completely. The weather outside is dismal and sad. It's pouring outside and your grandparents are outside with the only two umbrellas in the apartment. Careless you never thought to pack a raincoat when planning for this visit. Then again, there were a lot of things you weren't planning on. 

You feel lonely today, walking around the apartment by yourself. Your grandparents are out buying groceries, as mentioned before, the reason why they needed the umbrellas. They preferred walking over cars and the like. Earlier that morning, you had received a text from Tao saying "sorry cant meet too busy :(" You were cautious enough to just text back very quickly, only saying "It's okay, work hard~!" knowing that he might be too busy to even respond. The other members were busy as well, preparing for the comeback for all their fans. You're excited for it too, but with SMEntertainment (their company label) focusing on other bands like SHINee and f(x), you know it'll be delayed.

"I was never a patient person," you sigh to the empty room. It seems to catch your message and the room feels a little less empty. You remember when you were little, you used to talk to yourself when there was no one around. Back then, you told yourself that maybe your teddy bears can listen to you and they don't have to talk back, just listen. That old habit had withered away as you grew up and realized that it wasn't "socially acceptable". But now you did it again while you know that your grandparents will be out for some time. "Hello empty room." You say, feeling a little awkward. "I used to talk to myself like this, do you know that? I suppose now you do." You sigh. "Recently, I've been kinda lonely because Tao's busy. That's embarrassing sorry..." Apologizing to a wall? What happened to you?

I hope he's okay, at least... You think to yourself. It's a little ridiculous to even think this, of course he's safe. You can't help but worry. Six more days...and then I leave on the seventh day.

"You know," You say to the room. You stand up to walk around a little, stretch your legs. You didn't like the feeling you got after sitting down for so long. "I'm going to be leaving in seven days. I'll be on a plane. And then, I'll be gone. Will you miss me?" You sigh. In your head, you're thinking you must have gone a little mad. But you hope that they'll miss you. The doorbell rings. You run to the door wondering who could it be. It's a neighbor from downstairs. A nice old lady, friends with your grandmother, who has a small package in her hand. She says that it's for you, but got delivered to the wrong apartment. You thank her and take the small package. 

After closing the door, you walk to your room and sit down on the bed. It does indeed say your name on it, and below it, it says "FROM MAY". May? You think. I wonder what it is. 

You rip the brown paper open and pull out a small note first. It doesn't directly address you, but says "Hey, I heard you were leaving soon and I didn't want you to forget your cafe friend ;) so I got you a little souvenir." You and May had texted once or twice every day to keep in touch when you couldn't visit her. You would visit her now, but the rain dilemma was still not solved. You smile and pull out the gift.

The first thing you notice is that it's handmade. It's a small doll of what looks to be like a blue creature of some sort, with rabbit ears and a cute face. It's adorable; you already love it. "Thanks, May." You whisper to it. You wish you could go thank her now.

You take a glance at the clock. Late afternoon already. You get up from your bed and walk over to the desk. It's been a while since you've checked your email.

You have five new emails from five different recipients, and all emails that you don't recognize. Then you realize that they're from the other members. You read all of them, one by one. Lay's email is quick and uplifting, it makes you smile. Xiumin's email is cute, and his grammar is awful, but you can tell he's working hard. Luhan's email is cute and childish, but it makes you laugh as he writes about his days with the other members and without you, and how bored he was. Chen's email is like Xiumin's in grammar, but he's a little better. His email is a little rant about work and the other member's dorm habits. It's funny and you already feel better. Today's turning out to be alright, you think. The last email is from Kris, who you know can speak English excellently as he is from Canada. His email begins with "I got the computer last, so I wanted to give you the invite." Invite? It's not exactly an invite as more of a casual question about whether or not you want to join them tomorrow to hang out. They want to go to a small restaurant to eat. Of course I want to go... You go back to Lay's email, and begin writing your responses, one by one. Tomorrow's the 23rd day.

In your head, you're crossing out a date on your mental calendar. 

6 more days left. You sigh. You've sighed one too many breaths today.