"Oh... This is the part where it hurts..."

♥♠♥

It was late in the night when Kyungsoo finally finished cleaning both the kitchen and living room.  Stains still seeped on the walls and pieces of broken things lingered in places but the bulk of it was definitely cleared.  It was a bit heart wrenching to throw out certain things but it couldn’t be helped, what was broken was broken and there was no way to mend it back.

Kyungsoo’s heart wretched as he cleaned his house.  He put in a lot of effort to keep the electricity going and paying the bills.  It was practically a home he worked for in its small shanty state.  To have strangers come in and destroy it was angering.  But who could he get mad at?  If he were to get ‘revenge’ that would probably anger those people even more. They’d take everything away from Kyungsoo and his family until he’d be forced to give Ha Yi away so she wouldn’t have to live on the streets.  Kyungsoo never wanted to live on the streets again—it was destitute and he never wanted Ha Yi to ever experience that.

“How much?”  Kyungsoo walked into the kitchen to where his mother sat still, rummaging through a pile of broken glass.

The woman looked up at him with hair covering the entirety of her face, her eyes red from tears and mouth parted—leaving strands of hair to blow in and out.

“How much what?”  The woman barely spoke above a whisper as if her voice had left her long ago.

“How much do you owe?”  Kyungsoo tightened his fist having to hate to repeat himself to her.

“Six thousand…”  She mumbled.

“Six thousand? That’s it?  They went through all this trou—”

“…Dollars.”  She whispered again.

Kyungsoo could feel a surge of weakness running through his knees when he realized just how awful all this was going to be.

“D-Dollars?  You mean, American money?”  The woman nodded her head and Kyungsoo fell to his knees in front of the small step that led into the kitchen. “What on earth could you do with American money?!”  He nearly yelled.

“You’re father.”  The woman hung her head again and stared into her lap.

That was a cold word on Kyungsoo’s shoulders, he stiffened and became bitter.

“Mom, that is over millions of won.  I can’t afford that.”

“You’re father and I stole that money.”

“Mom, I don’t want to hear the story! The less I know the better!” Kyungsoo covered his ears, wanting nothing more of anything.

“He was so handsome that night, and we just celebrated.”

“Mom!” Kyungsoo shouted violently. “That’s enough.  Just tell me when they want it by.” The woman flinched and began to cry silently.

“Two months. Starting yesterday.”

“Ughhhh.” Kyungsoo groaned and climbed to his feet in slight pain.

Kyungsoo thought to himself for the moment, he needed to get this money saved up and quick.  Even if it meant dropping out of school for good and taking up five jobs. 

“Do you have any money what so ever to spare?” 

The woman perked her head up as if she smelled something. 

Her body followed in suit with her head as she clumsily stood up and made her way to her room in a fashion that seemed very odd to Kyungsoo.  He’d never realized how old his mother was getting until he noticed the slight curvature forming in her shoulders.

He waited for a minute when he realized his mother was getting something from her room. Listening to the crashing of objects told him she was searching intensely for it.

When she came back she was holding a tin box of what looked like cookies used to be held in it.  It was large, about the size of half her torso as she held it close and secretly to herself.

“This.  I’ve been saving it up all these years.  I knew they’d find me eventually.” She handed the box over, taking a double take of the room and windows to make sure they weren’t being watched.

Kyungsoo took the tin box and sat on the ground of the living room to open it. Inside made his jaw drop—at least a million won had to have been in there.  The box was fill to the brim with wads of cash in all different forms of five thousands to twenty thousands.

“How much is this?!” Kyungsoo whispered in a high pitch.

“I don’t know.  Last I counted was four million won. And that was about a year ago.”

“I need to count this right now, so I know how much I have to make—”

“You? Who said anything about you? This is my problem and I need to do this.”

“If I leave this to you, we’ll be homeless and probably beaten to death.”

“You don’t need to be any more involved than you already are. Just please.  Leave it to me.” She sighed also desperately.

“Who the hell do you think you are?  Ha Yi and I are just as involved as you now.  We could have been home when this happened, and they could have just as easily kidnapped us for ransom. Who knows what kind of heinous things they would do to a small ten year old girl!” Kyungsoo started raising his voice slowly.

“Kyungsoo!” His mother nearly gasped.

“This needs to be paid off as soon as possible because I’m not risking anyone getting hurt. I’m dropping out of high school and getting at least three more jobs to keep this going.”

“You will do no such thing! You will go to school young man and get an education. An education gets you further in life and I will not watch my son make the same mistakes I did.”

“Well you’re a little late on that, don’t you think?” Kyungsoo spat back. He stopped dead when a cold smack me with his cheek.

“After all I ever do for you and this is how you repay me? What do you think I’m doing every time I’m out of the house? Do you think I sleep with all those men because I like it? The money is the best I can get out of that, and it’s gotten me this much in the last ten years. You constantly believe I don’t support this family, when this is my way of supporting you. Paying off my debt is so that what we make doesn’t get cut in half.  When you started working I was able to stop splitting the money and put it all towards this.”

“So that’s it huh?” Kyungsoo began shaking his head. “You thought that you could just leave all the work to me to pay for the house and pay for the rent and pay for the heat and pay for the electricity and pay for groceries and everything else. When all this time, if we worked together could have gotten this done faster. You seriously think you were helping? You made everything ten times harder. And now with this stunt? Everything just became a hundred times harder.” Kyungsoo stood to his feet.

“It’s worked up until now. I don’t see what the problem is Kyungsoo. You didn’t need to be involved. You already had a lot of stress so I kept this from you to just focus on simple things instead of this.”

“Simple things?! You think working shifts for a family of three is simple?!”

“Simpler than most.”

“Unbelievable.” Kyungsoo turned away and started for the front door.

“Where are you going?” The woman asked in a panic.

“To pick up my sister.”

“Don’t do anything rash Kyungsoo, I’m begging you.  Just stay here and be safe.”

“Safe? Who the hell is safe anymore?” Kyungsoo zippered his jacket and slammed the door shut behind him.

He needed to get away from the stupidity that was his mother, he refused to see where the woman even got her mentality. As soon as the chilling early December air hit his face, he knew this would be a good walk to cool off on.

♥♠♥

By the time Kyungsoo reached Jongin’s house it was close to midnight. The lights were on in the dining room leaving Kyungsoo to know that at least someone was still up, but the lights from the downstairs windows where flickering, meaning someone was watching TV still.

Kyungsoo knocked on the door instead of ringing the doorbell to prevent anyone from waking up. He had expected Jongin to open the door but was surprised to see Mr. Kim with a very expressionless face.

“Oh, Kyungsoo. How nice of you to join us.” Mr. Kim said with a heavy strain of sarcasm as he allowed Kyungsoo step in.

“I’m sorry, sir. I got—”

“Ha Yi’s asleep already. You two might as well sleep the night, because there is no way I’m letting either of you back out there.” Mr. Kim crossed his arms as he stood in the door frame to the dining room.

“O-Oh.. Okay… I’m really sorry about tha—” Mr. Kim held up a palm to prevent him from speaking any further.

“Take your shoes and jacket off, and come into the kitchen when you’re done.”

Kyungsoo did as he was told and took a quick glance down the stairs to the basement to find the light of a TV still flickering. He sauntered off into the kitchen and found covered plates of food on the island counter top.

“That was your diner. I’m assuming you didn’t eat yet.”

“Oh, no. Thank you.” Kyungsoo took to his seat when Mr. Kim took the bowl of a hearty looking soup to heat up in the microwave.

“It’s too bad you missed it.  Ha Yi and I made kimchi stew.”

“Ah, you did? I bet it’s going to taste fantastic.”

“She’s quite the little chef, wouldn’t you agree?”

“I’ve made sure she knows how to cook so I’d hope she’s good.”

“She says she likes to copy the way you cook. She likes the look on your face when you do.”

“Did she… Really say that?” Kyungsoo was stunned.

“Mhm. She talks a lot about you when you’re not around you know.”

“I-I didn’t know that..”

“Yup, she and Jongin go on for hours talking about you.” Kyungsoo’s brows furrowed as Mr. Kim removed the stew from the microwave.

“Jongin? What does Jongin say?”

“Oh nothing really, just complains a bit really.”  Mr. Kim smiled more to himself when he went to give Kyungsoo his bowl.

“Of course.” Kyungsoo grimaced and started to dig into his food.

Mr. Kim stood there, leaning against the counter top silently watching Kyungsoo eat.

“Kyungsoo?” He looked up from his bowl. “Is everything okay?”

“Of course, why wouldn’t it be?”

“Because something tells me you didn’t go home tonight.” Kyungsoo’s cheeks turned red, and he began to feel guilty all of the sudden.

“I-I did.”

“I’m not saying I don’t trust you or anything. But if… You’re hiding something Soo, please let me know. I don’t want you to deal with whatever you’re dealing with alone.” Kyungsoo stayed silent and poked at the soup in his bowl. “You’re too young to be dealing with matters like the ones you deal with alone. I know you don’t have the best situation at home, and I know that I’m no father to you, but I will gladly help you through any trouble Kyungsoo. You’ve become a very important person in this family.” Mr. Kim paused to see if Kyungsoo would say anything, if he’d acknowledge anything at all. “I know how hard it is to keep everything bottled inside and to deal with stress alone. But I’ve also realized that you should never keep it that way… I’ve made that mistake with Jongin. I once knew something was wrong, but I never talked to him about. It wasn’t until one day things were so bad when I almost lost my son… To this day I can’t imagine how rough life would be if I never talked to him… Kyungsoo, what I’m trying to say is… That you’re not alone. If you ever need anything, just let me know. Okay?  I don’t want you going through your rough times alone.” 

Kyungsoo was speechless.

He didn’t know what to say.

There was no way he could ever tell Mr. Kim about the money his mother owed to who knows who. And there was no way he’d ever bring Mr. Kim’s family into this. They were good people, they didn’t deserve to get hurt.

“Anyways, look at our pies. Aren’t they cute?” Mr. Kim slid over the tray of small pies.

Kyungsoo nodded with a sincere smile, knowing exactly who made each pie.  The nicer looking ones were made by himself and Mr. Kim. While the messier ones were made by Ha Yi and Jongin.

“They’re quite delicious if you ask me. But there’s whipped cream in the fridge if you want any. Feel free to take as much as you want. Otherwise I’m heading off to bed. Ha Yi’s in Jinri’s room and Jongin left you some clothes in his room. The boys are downstairs watching a movie, so feel free to join them.”

“The boys? Is Sehun still here?” Kyungsoo asked with a poke of his head.

“Yeah, he decided to sleep over too.”

“Oh.  Thank you, sir.” 

“Will you stop calling me sir here? You can just call me Mr. Kim outside of work, Kyungsoo.”

“R-Right…”

“Alright, alright. I’ll let you finish, g’night.”

“Goodnight!” Kyungsoo called out as Mr. Kim left the kitchen.

He ate the rest of his soup rather quickly to get upstairs and check on Ha Yi as soon as possible. When he finished, he put his plate in the sink and gave a slight jog all the way to Jinri’s room. And just like last time, Ha Yi was sleeping soundly with her dark hair covering the pillow. Kyungsoo smiled to himself at the serene sight of his sister. She was safe so he felt safe.

Kyungsoo changed into the pajamas that Jongin provided and made his way back down the stairs to the kitchen. He washed his bowl and utensils and any other miscellaneous objects that laid in the sink. When he finished, he took a bite of one of the wonky looking pies and savored every second of it. They were sour yet perfectly sweet and creamy.  It was a wonderful balance and he loved every second of crispy crust and smooth filling.

Kyungsoo even took to the fridge and found a can of whipped cream to spare on another piece of pie. He jumped when the noise of the whipped cream came out louder than expected, but nonetheless enjoyed the flavor when he ate the second pie. He knew he could single handedly eat all the pies at once but forced himself from the kitchen to join the two boys downstairs.

He quietly and slowly made his way downstairs, not really sure what he was going to find. But he was met with two fully awake boys jumping at the sight of Kyungsoo.

“Geez, what the hell man! Scared the out of us.” Sehun moaned as he tried to reposition in his seat next to Jongin.

“Sorry.” Kyungsoo mumbled heading over to the single chair instead of the couch where Sehun and Jongin sat.

“Hey, sit with us.” Jongin said as he patted the seat next to him.

Kyungsoo contemplated it for a hot second before getting up and settling down next to Jongin. 

“What movie are you guys watching?” He asked in a whispering voice.

“It’s called Silent Hill, an American horror movie.” Sehun announced excitedly.

“You might not like it Kyung.” Jongin turned over to Kyungsoo and went to wrap and arm around him. “But you can hide here, so don’t worry.” Jongin gave a reassuring smile as Sehun gagged.

Kyungsoo balled his legs to himself and made himself comfortable (and a little awkward) under Jongin’s arm.

“My dad went to bed already?”

“Yeah.”

“Is everything alright?” Jongin prodded just a little more.

“Yeah.. Everything’s fine.”  Kyungsoo mumbled as he tried to focus more on the movie rather than Jongin. He liked to remind himself that under normal circumstances he would push the latter away, but the movie was already a bit on the creepy side so their proximity was okay.

The really scary stuff in the movie hadn’t bothered Kyungsoo as much as the gore did, but Jongin was grateful that the boy fell asleep before any terrible scenes could happen. Kyungsoo was snuggled into Jongin’s ribcage, keeping an eye away from the screen just in case of a possible scary scene. Sehun and Jongin on the other hand did their best to not pee their pants in the process.

“Think he had a rough night?”

“You mean tonight?”

“No, yesterday. You said he looked terrible this morning.”

“Yeah, he must have…” Jongin looked down at Kyungsoo’s sleeping frame and brought a hand to his forehead. “I hope he’s really okay. Him and Ha Yi are just as equally secretive.” Jongin swiped a few strands of hair back on Kyungsoo’s forehead and lightly brushed the sight.

“He didn’t do his homework again.”

“I did.”

“When did you do that?” Sehun was taken back.

“When I was upstairs waiting for the pies to finish. The ones you so graciously did not help with.” Jongin stuck his tongue out in mockery.

“Well sorry! These games don’t just beat themselves ya know.” Sehun raised his voice just barely above a whisper, only to be hushed by Jongin.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.  Just shut up and watch the movie.” 

The two finished the movie with heavy hearts and sat on the couch for a moment thinking about the ending. 

“Sooo…”  Sehun tried to break the silence through the movie credits.  “Where am I sleeping tonight?”

“Down here.  I’m going to bring him upstairs and I’ll bring us some blankets and pillows downstairs.”

“Good plan, now are you really gonna wake him up? He’s exhausted, Jongin.”

“I know. I’m gonna carry him.”

Sehun scoffed, “No offense dude, but when’s the last time you worked out?”

Jongin snickered back, “I work out all the time! How dare you? .”

“Shut up, poop nugget.”

“ you!” Jongin got up from the couch and started his journey to carry Kyungsoo up two flights of stairs. He made sure to hold the teen close to his chest, careful not to wake him.

“See? Not… So bad..” Jongin struggled to keep balance for a moment as he stood upright.

“I swear to god, if you drop him.” Sehun shook his head. “Blackmail for the rest of your life.”

“ you, Oh Sehun.”

“Sorry, not my type.”

Jongin gritted his teeth and turned his back to climb the stairs to his room. It was a shock that Kyungsoo even managed to stay asleep the entire time, he was helplessly obnoxious in every movement he took. However, Kyungsoo was just so exhausted that not even the slightest brashest noise would wake him up. 

After placing Kyungsoo in his bed and kissing his forehead sweetly, he grabbed two pillows and two blankets for the two boys to share downstairs. Right before doing so, he checked in on Ha Yi to make sure she was sleeping.

However, when he opened the door, he was met with a very distraught looking girl.

“Whoa, it’s okay. It’s just me.” Jongin cooed her as he placed the bed sheets down and walked into the room. “Everything alright?” He asked as he sat next to her on the bed side.

Ha Yi instead wrapped her arms tightly around Jongin’s side.

“I had a bad dream.”

“Oh? What about?” He took a hand to her long hair back.

“About big brother.. We were separated by mean people..” Ha Yi snuggled into Jongin’s side just a bit tighter.

“Silly, your brother’s in the next room.”

“He is?” She shot her head up in a rush of excitement.

“Mhm, so if you ever get scared, you can just walk over to see him… But don’t be scared young lady. Nothing’s going to happen to you or your brother. I won’t let anything happen.” Jongin smiled as he placed a firm hand on the side of her head.

“Promise?” 

“I promise. Now get back to bed missy. It’s late and you have to wake up early tomorrow.”

“Okay.” Ha Yi gave Jongin one last hug before she snuggled back into her covers.

“Oh! Jonginnie?”

“Yeah?” Jongin opened the door back just before he was about to close it all the way.

“Did Kyungsoo talk to you about coming to my school?”

“No he didn’t actually.”

“I’m making a song with my friends and I wanted you and Kyungsoo to come in and listen when we present. We’re supposed to have family come, but I wanted you two there.” She smiled brightly at Jongin.

“Oh… Of course I’ll go. If Kyungsoo will let me, that is.”

“He will! He said he would. You have to fill the permission slip though, Kyungsoo has that.”

“Okay, I will. Goodnight, Yiyi.” Jongin smiled softly at her before closing the door completely.

He stood in front of the door for a moment before gathering the sheets once more and heading back downstairs (despite wishing he could sleep in the same bed as Kyungsoo).

“Wow, you took longer than I thought. But I still didn’t hear any thuds so that’s a perk.” Sehun smirked at Jongin as he walked into the basement.

“Shut up.” Jongin took the pillows and threw them square into Sehun’s face. “Ha Yi had a nightmare so I made her go back to bed.”

“Mm… This is weird.” Sehun said as he began to make himself comfortable on the long couch.

“What is?” Jongin replied as he got himself comfortable on the recliner.

“Having so many people in the house.”

“Isn’t it?” Jongin agreed as he took the sheets closer to his face.

“Do you like it though?” 

“I like it a lot.. Mainly because I never expected to be on this level with Kyungsoo.”

“Well lover boy, you still have a looooong way to go.” Sehun howled in a mocking tone.

“You have no room to talk.”

“At least I’ve had a girlfriend.”

“At least I know I’m into guys.”

“You can go a .”

“You know I will!” Jongin began to laugh with his comebacks, knowing exactly that Sehun was fighting a lost cause.

“ you, you weed.”

“When did our friendship turn into insults man, this is literally the basis of all our conversations.”

“Well, I mean, given we’ve known each other since what? Elementary school? And because I see you all the time, I’m annoyed to with you and hate your guts, I think it’s pretty reasonable.”

“Shut up. Go to bed.” Jongin deadpanned with his eyes closed.

But of course, just like almost every sleepover that two have ever had, the two stayed up laughing and giggling over inside jokes, people at school, their complicated love lives and anything they could think of to talk about. No matter how much they seemed to hate each other, it was always late nights that brought them closer than ever and reminded them why they were even friends.

♥♠♥

“Hey?  Did you do my homework?” For once in Jongin’s forsaken life, the sound of an angel had come to find him instead of the other way around.

“Wh-What?” Jongin was a little taken aback at seeing Kyungsoo in his homeroom.

“Did you do my homework?” He repeated once again.

“Uhhh.. Yeah I did.” Jongin actually needed a quick moment to remember what he did the day prior.

“You didn’t have to.” Kyungsoo bore his eyes down on Jongin, not really meaning to do so.

“Oh, well, I knew you would get home late so I did it for you.”

“I really appreciate it.  But please, next time ask. I owe you one now.”

“Well you kinda owe him a lot so..” Sehun snuck into the conversation as Jongin began to stand up from his seat. “I’d suggest you get on your knees, like now.”

“Really, Sehun?  Really?  Where’s Baekhyun and Tao?” Jongin asked to discreetly change the subject without trying to explode.

“They’re at lunch already. I told them I’d meet them there.” Kyungsoo grimaced at Sehun—the innuendo completely flying over his head.

“Oh, well then let’s go.”

Jongin smiled slightly at Kyungsoo before he took his way out of the room. The three boys walked together for lunch, leaving Kyungsoo to really listen more than engage.  Nonetheless, Jongin couldn’t complain when Kyungsoo was right beside him.

For the rest of the day Jongin thought about why Kyungsoo had even visited him in the first place. It was nice that he did that, and it made him really freaking happy to even think that Kyungsoo was the first one to initiate an interaction like that. The rest of class ended up being a blur in Jongin’s mind because he was so busy day dreaming about Kyungsoo.

It wasn’t until the bell rang that Jongin was taken out of his trance and excitedly packed his belongings to leave for the day.

“Yo, where’s your rush—ah wait a minute. That was a stupid question.” Sehun nearly rolled his eyes as he walked up to Jongin with his back pack slung over one shoulder.

“Imma go see if Kyungsoo wants to go out tonight.”

“He probably has work.” Sehun trudged after Jongin down the hall to meet up with Kyungsoo at his locker.

“Yeah, well, it couldn’t hurt to try.”

Just as the two were about to turn a corner, they found Kyungsoo walking towards them with a determined face.

“Hey! Kyung—” He raised a hand to catch Kyungsoo’s attention.

“Can’t right now Jongin.”  Kyungsoo deadpanned, not even sparing him a glance as he plowed through the two boys.

“Push and pull Jong, push and pull.” Sehun smacked the back of Jongin’s back as he slowly brought his demeanor down to the ground. “It’s okay buddy, this is the basis of a strong relationship. I hated you too when we first me.”

“You took my ing wrestling doll.”

“That’s right, I hated you for having something cooler than me.”

“These are two completely different situations.” Jongin turned to watch Kyungsoo walk down the hall. 

“But the point is, we both hate you.”

“Just shut up Sehun, you’re the worst.”

“Oh no, is the big bad Jongin gonna cry.” Jongin shoved Sehun hard in the chest, almost sending the boy to the ground. “Holy man, totally uncalled for.” Sehun rubbed his chest in complete pain.

“Then learn when to shut up.” Jongin really wasn’t happy, it was clearly stated on his face.

“Where you going?” Sehun called out for Jongin as he left in the direction of Kyungsoo.

“To find out what he’s doing.”  Jongin mumbled, not really caring if Sehun heard him or not.  He’d just about had enough of Sehun’s smart-aleck responses.

He was lost for a good two minutes trying to find wherever Kyungsoo left off too, but he knew it was odd when the boy wasn’t heading for the entrance of the building. By this time he’d be on his way to work or to pick up Ha Yi from school. 

It wasn’t until he heard the overly loud, strained voice of someone that he started to panic. He ran towards the voice and was led to the part of the school that had been already clear of dismissed students. 

As soon as he turned another corner he was met with a tall and rather melancholic Kris. Jongin stood in his tracks for a moment as the figure trudged towards him, looking at the ground with his hands in his pockets. Jongin’s heart sank again when he realized that Kris had come out of the abandoned music room and quickly ran past the kid to make sure Kyungsoo wasn’t inside.

The soft murmurs of voices made Jongin slow down when he realized there were two of them in the room. The door was just slightly askew, leaving him able to peek through. 

However, Jongin would rather forget everything he was witnessing. He’d rather let a truck hit him head on and cause him to suffer from amnesia than be right here in this moment. He wanted to wither away and let the cold air take his remains and spread them out over the Pacific Ocean; to be eaten by the many creatures that roamed it. 

In the room was of course Kyungsoo, like he feared, and Tao—the exchange student who he always had a little disdain towards. Their lips were touching in a manner that Jongin wished was never possible. It was a light and innocent kiss that Jongin took way too much to heart. A kiss he knew nothing the boundaries of and stayed in denial at the fact Kyungsoo did indeed have a small thing for Tao; he refused to ever believe it. But all of the life wanted to drain from his body through to his feet and pool in a crumpled mess.

He watched as Kyungsoo lightly pulled away from the stunning kiss and whispered something that he was no longer paying attention to. He stumbled backwards and shook his head, trying to hold the tears in.

The more he stumbled, the more speed he picked up, running faster than any situation had caused him too before. Not a care if his book bag was losing all sorts of worksheets and notebooks. He needed to escape, because in all honesty, he felt like he was about to throw up.

just a casual reminder that you can unsub whenever you feel lol

sorry these posts got late again

i'm worrking one story at a time, even if this is it'll get done, just can't not give up on a thing and learn from my mistakes