“Seunghyun hyung, can you hear me?” the darkness swallowed Daesung's quivering voice. He was lying beside Seunghyun's feverish body, huddled up under what could only be called a pile of sticks. Every few minutes or so, Daesung's eyes involuntarily darted up in the direction of the main tree pole that was barely holding this hovel together, expecting it to cave in at any moment. Thankfully it was getting too dark to see anything past his own nose, so he could imagine they were really lying on a hospital bed, where qualified doctors were just one shout away, able to step in and save Seunghyun if worse came to worst. Everything was going to be okay.

Seunghyun was shivering fervently, the clatter of his teeth controlling the nervous rhythm of Daesung's heartbeat. He took off his already shortened shirt to make a lame attempt at making Seunghyun a blanket, but it couldn't even be called lame it was so lacking. Just then a thought popped into his mind, or it was the resurfacing of an old memory he didn't even know he had stored away. He had heard somewhere that rather than clothes, the best, most efficient way to keep up someone's body heat was by using one's own body.

He swallowed with difficulty, his gut churning. The already cramped shack seemed like it was closing in on him, making it difficult to breathe. What if Seunghyun woke up and he was..? What if he could feel..? He shook his head, mad at himself for thinking such frivolous thoughts at a time like this. What did it matter anymore if Seunghyun found out? The secret he had worked so hard at keeping safely locked away in his heart's coffer didn't seem as scary as it once had. Seunghyun finding out would mean he was getting better, and if this could help make that happen, even the tiniest little bit, it was all that Daesung needed to know. It wasn't a choice, it was just something he had to do, no matter what.

He quickly stripped right down to his boxers, turning towards Seunghyun next, carefully removing all his clothes as well. Getting his shirt over his wounded head was the most tricky, but with precision and patience he persevered. He was so nervous that his stomach threatened to return the nothingness it was carrying. There was nothing left but to lie down next to him, huddle up skin to skin and wait for their bodies to do the rest. Daesung's heart was doing its best in trying to escape his chest, punching the inside of his ribcage so hard that he imagined it was all black and blue. He hoped he was doing the right thing. At least he couldn't see how this could do any damage, worst case scenario meant it was pointless. If there was more than zero percent chance that it was going to help, Daesung could live with those odds.

“Here goes nothing.” he whispered to himself, as he swung his leg cautiously over Seunghyun's motionless legs, gently resting it on top of them, using their clothes as a blanket. The leaves that had been lain on the ground for insulation scratched his side as he edged closer, his trembling hand grabbing hold of Seunghyun's upper arm as he hugged him tight. He could feel him everywhere, he was warm to the touch yet trembling, dry sweat making their skin stick together.

This was what he had always dreamt of, and at the same time his own personal nightmare. This was not how he had pictured their first night together, not even close. His chest ached with conflicting emotions, creating a murky storm cloud within him that shot lightning bolts into his gut. He swallowed with difficulty, feeling almost as clammy as Seunghyun. What if he didn't make it through the night? What if he died before he had the chance to tell him how he felt? Would he be able to live with that? He bit his lower lip, he wasn't sure. He wasn't ready to confess, but this might very well be his last chance. He held back the nonexistent tears, he was too dehydrated to afford tears. He felt so useless. He couldn't even cry for Seunghyun. Had there ever been a more incompetent and pathetic person in the history of humanity? He doubted it. He wished he could switch places with him, the world needed a Seunghyun in it, for without him it stopped making sense altogether.

“Hyung.” he whispered into the nothingness. He knew he wouldn't get an answer, still he continued. He wanted to believe that he could hear him, so he imagined he could.

“They say this could be your last night, but they don't know you. Not like I do. You're tougher than you think, I believe in you. You're strong. Remember after the car accident, how you..” Daesung's voice faltered. Thinking about it still pained him to the point of not wanting to live any longer. Every muscle in his body contracted, his stomach clenched so tight that the two drops of water that inhabited it began to search for a way out. He had hated himself so fiercely, not only for causing the accident, but also for not being man enough to pay the price. He had deserved to die too, but he just couldn't go through with it. His will to live was too strong, even if he had to live as an unworthy bottom dweller, scavenging the darkest crevices of the Earth, despised by all, he still wanted to live.

He had sent himself into exile, locking himself within the confinements of his own body, vowing never to return. But Seunghyun never gave up on him. Every day he would show up or call him, even though he refused to talk to him. Days turned into weeks, yet Seunghyun didn't miss a single day. No matter how often he rejected him, how forcefully he shut him out, he was unfazed in his one man mission to bring him back. And finally, one uneventful day, a day like any other, he could feel his icy heart start to melt. It took time, but Seunghyun helped him get back on his feet, just by being there, by never giving up on him. It was time to repay the favor.

“You pulled me out of hell, now it's my turn. I have something extremely important to tell you, something I should have told you years ago, but you know me, always the coward. So if you are brave enough to hold on, I'll be brave enough to reveal my secret.” Daesung could barely squeeze the words out past the lump in his throat. He had zero confidence in his plan, but he was going to stubbornly stick with it, just like Seunghyun had stuck with him.

“If I pinky swear to tell you tomorrow, do you pinky swear to be here to hear it?” he asked in a louder and more decisive tone.

“Pinky swear.” he said as he locked his pinky finger around Seunghyun's limp finger. He gasped. Seunghyun's finger had twitched, ever so slightly. It could have been a simple reflex, a random release of residual electricity through his muscle, but Daesung took it as confirmation.

“If you break our promise, I won't forgive you, you hear?” he warned him softly.

“Okay, water, check.” Yunho said to himself as he anxiously rechecked the various containers they had set up to catch the next sky shower that came their way. And he had made sure the blankets and clothes that they had found were carefully strung up to dry on nearby tree branches. Two incompatible goals. For water they needed rain, for dry clothes just the opposite. Water was more important though.

They had eaten a bit of the food they had recovered today in their scavenge hunt, but he had rationed it so that there would be enough left for a substantial breakfast, to help them start a productive day tomorrow since they desperately needed to find a permanent solution to their lack of food problem, as well as creating a safe place for everyone to rest their heads at the end of yet another hellish day in this godforsaken place.

How long would they be able to survive here? Was someone really looking for them? They had better have a general idea of the coordinates where they had disappeared, for else it was like hunting down a single ant on a vast sandy beach. Simply not possible. He took a deep breath. He had never been as exhausted in his entire life, and he was a member of the most popular idol group that had ever existed, meaning no sleep, ever.

As he headed for the edge of the forest, he could see the outline of Changmin's tall, slender body. He stuck out like a sore thumb. While the others were pairing up and preparing for sleep, he just stood there. A smile rejuvenated Yunho's tired lips, Changmin was always so wonderfully awkward when it came to interacting with others. Communication was not his strong suit, preferring to leave that to Yunho whenever possible. He never failed to make him feel like he was needed. It was a nice feeling, like coming home. He had thanked fate several times throughout the course of the day for not taking Changmin away from him, he was the only thing that kept him going. If it was for Changmin, he could be strong. He could become a great, big, unsinkable rock the rest of them could hold on to and stay afloat for as long as it took. For Changmin.