JUNHONG’S POV

After having a six months treatment in the hospital, finally I can find some one who can offer me the strong eyes. I quickly have a successful surgery and I can see the world again. I can see things, smiles…of people around me. But I can’t see my lover’s smile or it isn’t for me any more. Him Chan is with Jong Up- his new love- and he is smiling very shine. I’m sure he is very happy now so after these things, I just want to let him go if there is his happiness.

“ Always be happy like that! A person I used to love!” – I smile. It is a little bitter but it doesn’t hurt me anymore. I take a deep sigh and go straight to my house in which I haven’t been for almost a year.

“ Ouch!!!” – I frown when I first step in the house. It’s too dirty! It has been six motnhs since I last cleaned it. It needs repairing now.

After three hours repairing the mess, finally I can lie on my bed comfortably. I look around my house, everything is the same as it before. But why do I feel so lost? Suddenly, my eyes stop at a picture hanging in the wall. There are Yong Guk and me, we are making a heart by our hands and smile sweetly to each other in this picture. Suddenly, my heart beats when I see him. And I realize the reason why I felt so lost. I am lost in my loneliness. This house used to be full of laughs before, Yong Guk and I used to have interesting moments here. But now, there is just me with my loneliness. I stand up, walk toward to the wall and hold the picture in my hand. I touch him with my finger.

I quickly come back to my daily life. Do you know how I feel? Very good and interesting! The feeling that you can see anything is very good. I’m not a blinded idiot anymore. Thanks to that person, I’m here today. I heard that person is a man but they don’t let me know who is he. It’s ok, I will find it out by myself. Today is like everyday, I’m in the hospital begging the doctors to let me meet my benefactor but they don’t. Hopelessly, I walk out the hospital.

“ Urddd, why don’t they let me meet that man, huh?” – I think

“ Or he die?”- ….

“ No,…. But who is he? Why did he help me?” - I coo to myself. Arrr, my god my mind is going crazy.

I walk along the nearest park and still thinking about that good person. I need to say thank you to him because he has saved my life. But how to find him makes me go crazy. Suddenly, it rains. I run to find a place to locate. I run as fast as I can because the rain is heavier. Rain drops blur my sight so I can’t see anything clearly. I bump into a man so hard. It hurt me so much but anyway it is my fault. I help him stand up. When I’m closer to him, I’m frozen.

“ I’m sorry” – He says to me. But I can’t say anything. I shut my mouth up tightly. His face, his familiar low voice make my heart stop beating. Is it Yong Guk?I look at him from head to toes. But why is he like this huh? Why doesn’t he see me? The stick is in front of him but why he cannot pick it up.

“ Sorry I’m blinded so that I cannot see you” – He says. After a while, he can pick his stick up.

“ Are you ok?”- he asks me.

I am shocked. Blinded? Yong Guk ah are you kidding me? Still that face, still that voice but what happened to that eyes huh? What happened to him during last year? I lose my mind.I feel very difficult to breath.

“ Uhm, I’m ok” – After calming down myself, I reply him. I help him find a nearest place to locate because we are wet now.

The rain is heavier, he and I are sitting under the bus stop. I look at him from head to toes  again in pain. He is thiner than before. How did he live in the past year? Was his life good? Does he remember me?... A lot of questions stream out in my mind. Sitting close to him like this, the old feelings fill my heart up. Suddenly I cry. He looks very lamentable now.

“ What happened to your eyes?” – I asks with a shaking voice.

“I can’t see anything”- He answers with an insensitive voice.

“Why you cannot see anything?”- I get angry when I hear his answer. Yong Guk ah, I used to be blinded and I was scare of darkness. Don’t you feel scare?

“ Because of love”- He turns face to face with me and says with a sweet voice.

“ Love?” – I frown.

“ And guilty?” – He sighs. I can see a break in his eyes. I just keep silent or exactly I can’t open up my mouth. After taking a deep sigh, he continues:

“ Last year, my lover was in an accident and he lost his eyes. That was my fault. I was the person who brought him mishaps. He is scared of darkness and he will die in loneliness. So I decided to offer him my eyes. Eventhough he is not loving me anymore but I always want him to be happy so I need to sacrify myself.  I wish nothing but the best for him.”

I’m frozen step by step when I hear what he has just said. It’s like a thunder across my mind. What is he talking about? My eyes are his eyes? I’m a sinner who take his life.

Yong Guk ah, why are you so good to me? Do you remember I was the person who had left you on that rainy day? I was the person who gave you so much pain? Yong Guk ah, you are a nut when you gave your love to me. Deeply in my heart, I’m hurted so bad. It hurts me a thousand time more than when I knew Him Chan cheated me.. I cry, my tears for which is its owner fall down from my eyes- Yong Guk.

“ I don’t know why I said these secrets to you but please keep it for me!”- He smiles to me.

The rain is stopped. He picks his stick up and tends to leave. I still cannot escapse from the shock so I just stand there and watch him walk away. Untill I realize I can’t let him go like that, I chase to him as fast as I can and hug him from his back. He startled and drops his stick.

“ Who are you?” – He asks worriedly.

I’m still silent and hug him tighter.

“ I’m blinded, I can’t see anything. So don’t scared me” – He sobs.

His sentence is like a knife prod my heart. My tears fall down again.

“ Yong…Guk…ah” – There is something bitter in my throat. He is surprised when he hear I call his name. I continue:

“ It’s me, Junhong, hyung ah!”- I wipe my tears out and say. “ I’m back to you, hyung ah”

I can hear his heart beating faster and faster. He moves his lips.

“ Choi Junhong?” – He whispers.

“ Uhm, it’s me. I’m back to you hyung ah”- I cry a lot and so does he.

But he suddenly gets angry.

“ Go, go away from me!” – He shouts at me.

“ No… I won’t let you alone again hyung ah”- I reply.

“Please stay away from me. I am the person who kill your life. So don’t forgive me. I need to pay for it”- He intends to release my hug but I hug him tighter.

“No… I need to be here with you. I know you’re scared of darkness too. So, forget all these things hyung ah.”– I say in sob.

“ But…” – He frowns

“ I’m sorry hyung ah. I brought you mishaps. Please give me another chance. Can we begin again?” – I asks with a low voice.

As soon as I completed my sentences, he turns back a hug me very tight. And me too, I don’t want to lose him again.

It rains again because we are in rainy season but who care. I feel very warm because I know my real love always by my side. He saved my life. He gave me his own lights.. I hug him tighter so that he can’t be out of my life again.

“Yong Guk hyung ah” – I whisper to his ear

“ Huh?”- He frowns

“Let me be the lights of your life!” – I suggest.

He nods. I smiles happily. The rain outside is heavier. We are hugging each other tighter. We are having happy smiles.

“ Gukie ah, I love you” – I say with a sweet voice.

“ Me too!!” – He whispers sweetly to my ear.

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That's all my story ^^! Thank you for your reading! English is not my first language so forgive me if I have grammatical mistakes! Love you guys ^^!