I like you.

I love you.

Can you hear me?

I guess you can't.

You're not supposed to, anyway.

You're so near, yet so far.

You're within my reach, yet you feel like a million miles away.

The way you look at her, the way you smile at her, the way you touch her.

Couldn't you let me experience that in your arms, even just once?

Why can't you read my heart?

Whenever you kiss her in front of me, I die a little inside. Whenever you hold her hand within my sight, I wish she'd just disappear so you could hold mine instead.

I've sometimes wished for her to just die or leave you, so that I'll be there to comfort you and shower you with love.

But she makes you happy. She's the one you love. She's the one for you.

Not me.

I know I can never make you happy in the way she makes you happy. The way you look at her with love, and the way you touch her with such adoration… You can never do that with me.

You can never love me in the same way you love her.

"She finally said yes!"

Those were the words that hurt me the most. The minute they came out of your mouth, they pierced me like sharp daggers driven straight through my guts. I could do nothing but immediately put on a mask, feigning happiness, patting you on the back, exclaiming words of congratulations that seemed to spout out of my mouth from nowhere.

"That's awesome!" Why did she have to say yes? "When are you having the wedding?" Let it be never. "I'm really happy for you." But I wish it was because of me.

"I don't know when, maybe about a month from now! I'm so excited, you know how much I've been wanting to marry her. I know we've only been together for six months, but I really feel as though she's the one."

No, no, she's not the one. I'm the one.

I've always been the only one for you, but you never saw that.

"That's great, then." That day will be the day I disappear forever.

"I want you to be my best man, Andy-yah." He looked at me with such serious eyes, and took my hand in both of his, staring straight into me without seeing me, without seeing how much this hurts me, without knowing that he's torturing me instead. "You're my best friend. My one and only who's always been there for me."

I swallowed, my throat parched, tears stinging the back of my eyes, threatening to fall any minute. I pull away from his grasp and turn quickly away, just as a lone tear fell from the side of my eye. "Yes, yes, of course. Of course I'll be your best man."

"Are you crying?" His voice came ever so softly from behind me, and at that fleeting moment all I wanted to do was to turn around and throw myself into his arms, his arms that are perpetually open for me, yet not in the way I want them to be. I wanted to cry into him, and tell him everything, but his next words threw all of those feelings out the window. "Gosh, are you that happy that I asked you to be my best man? Why are you so surprised anyway? You should have known that I was going to ask you!" He said this in such a happy voice, such a friendly tone, that I couldn't even be angry with him for making me feel so tortured. Not that I had any right to be.

I managed a small laugh, and wiping my eye with the back of my hand, I turned back to him with another smile plastered on my face. "I'm happy for you." Even though I'm not the one.

------------------

The day has come. She walks daintily, slowly, into the church, her long, white train flowing behind her. Her face was hidden behind the veil, but anyone could see how beautiful she looked. No wonder Jun Jin fell in love with her. She was a painting come to life- pale skin, round eyes, defined jawline, gentle smile. She has everything, I have nothing.

I clench my fists tightly at my sides.

"Do you, Park Choongjae, take Lee Siyoung as your wife?"

"I do." Of course you do.

"And do you, Lee Siyoung, take Park Choongjae as your husband?"

I say a silent prayer, hoping that she had cold feet, hoping that she somehow decided overnight that she doesn't love Jun Jin, my Jun Jin, anymore. But the loving look on her face says it all. "I do."

I turn away as they kiss. I need not be tortured any longer.

I don't care. I don't care about anything else. During the reception after the ceremony, I somehow managed to put myself on autopilot, talking, laughing, speaking normally as if it was someone else in my body. They did not know, but beneath my smiles, beneath my usual laugh that Jun Jin had always declared he loves, lies a man who was robbed of the one thing he had in this world.

"Ya, Andy-ya! Let's go take a family picture." He suddenly grabbed my hand and practically dragged me to where they were taking pictures. I smiled. I laughed. I whined at him cutely to let me go, complaining that I wasn't family, to which he predictably objected to. It was no longer me who was in my body, but another side of me, the side that would have been truly happy for him were it not for the fact that I had loved him ever since I could remember, and now he is claimed by a woman who hasn't even known him as much as I do.

The world is cruel. The world is unfair. I don't need to be in this world.

As I drive home, tears stinging my eyes block my view of the dark road illuminated by hundreds upon hundreds of headlights, cars going in every direction, its drivers and passengers just wanting to get home. I could barely see, but it was better this way. Maybe, just maybe, I will drive over a rail, fall over a steep cliff, and welcome the sweet arms of death that will liberate me from these feelings that constrict my heart.

I step on the gas pedal, my speed slowly accelerating, the needle on my speedometer rising dangerously. But I didn't care. There was nothing else. I had nothing but him, but he too, was taken away. There's nothing else to live for.

My phone ringing somewhat snapped me back to reality, but I instead stepped on the gas pedal even harder. Let it ring. It didn't matter anymore. 

And just then, a voice. Voicemail.

"Andy-yah, you must be driving. Well, don't let me disturb you, then. I just want to tell you thanks for today, I'm sorry we weren't able to talk much because of all the guests. Thanks for being there for me every time. Anyway, drive safely. I'll see you tomorrow!"

Silence.

But that was enough to bring me back to my senses. I did have something to live for, and that was Jun Jin.

Even though he'll never feel the same way towards me.

But that's what love is. Love is loving someone even though they hurt you. Love is caring about someone so much that you're willing to sacrifice for them.

And I was willing to sacrifice.

I stepped on the breaks, hard, screeching to a halt just in front of a railing.

I hate you, Park Choongjae. No matter what, even if it's so torturing to be with you, your sweet words always overpower me.

Of course I'l be there for you. I've always been. Even if it hurts, even if I die, even if I have to see you with that woman everyday, even if I can never have you, even if I'm not the one… I won't leave you.

See you tomorrow.

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A/N: Inspired by K.Will's Please Don't. I was watching the music video and actually wrote out the first part a long time ago without intending it for any pairing, but I finally got the inspiration I needed tonight to turn it into JinDy. So yep, there you go. Next chapter should be up fairly soon.

Also for those who don't know, Lee Siyoung is Jun Jin's ex-girlfriend who he was also partnered with on We Got Married back in 2008 (I think).