| 21 ; choices ; |
The 'Game of Nowhere'❝choices
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For better or for worse, life always gives us choices.
Xiumin's perspective
When I let the arrow go, I must admit that I cried. Yes, I know, I have no rights to mourn or grieve for his death. But… I have my own reasons—reasons that only I understood—and, maybe, you will understand me too after reading this chapter of mine.
After that encounter, I didn’t even have time to show how I feel; I was engulfed by my fear. Noises filled my ears and when I raised my eyes from the fallen body before me, I saw the other members. I felt shame. I was such a disgrace and so I fled. I was no more aware of anything around me, except for the fact that Chen was beside and he was a whole different person—someone dark, someone avaricious. We just ran, not even stopping for a rest, until we reached the beach.
“We have to go across.” Chen said, somehow demandingly. “Find a way, Minseok.”
That rang a bell in me. Since when did he start calling me Minseok again?
“How?!” I asked, annoyed. “Why do we even have to cross?”
“Freeze the surface, of course.” He rolled his eyes. “The only way to survive is to get there. I have to know the cheat to beat this game.”
Cheat? I stared at him incredulously but obeyed anyway. I my hand out and muttered a word of command: Se-kebeb which means ‘make cold’. Frost streamed forth and the surface went frozen. As I stepped on it, it thickened. Layers and layers of ice piled underneath until the surface was as durable as solid ground. I smiled at him, waiting for words of praise or something, but he ignored me and went on walking. I heaved a sigh. He has changed a lot. He did not even show any signs of gratitude.
I followed after him and we walked in silence for a very long duration of time, almost halfway towards our destination. The Chen I knew won’t survive that measure of time without saying something. I stopped on my tracks. I can’t just disregard this change of behaviour.
“Chen!” I called out while clenching my fists. “Why do you want to know the cheat?”
He glared t me, quite browned off. “To win, of course. We are in a hurry, why bother asking?”
I didn’t move a bit. “And what does winning mean to you?”
He huffed in an idiosyncratic way. “Killing everyone and getting out of this game alive.”
I laughed at my imbecile self. Why am I helping this heartless monster? “Is that it?”
“If you are not coming, I should get going.” He started walking again. “You are such a waste of time.”
Wow, the guts. I mocked him inside me. No matter what, I won’t let you go. I should have known better when I saw that murderous look in your eyes as you gaze upon Kyungsoo. I softened the place on where he is standing and he sank into the water. I froze the surface above him. I looked down and saw him banging hardly against the ice.
I knelt down. “Sorry, Chen.” I turned around; tracing back the path we took. Besides, I was not interested on the cheat. If I would ever win, I will win fair and square.
As I was walking back, the whole surface shuddered. I looked back and saw that the surface cracked on a certain area. The sky above began to turn dark with lightning crackling across the sky as Chen emerged from the water panting and wet.
I looked at him for a moment, too stunned to move, and I burst into laughter. There has been an idea that kept running on my mind for quite a moment now and staring at Chen right now, I fully understood it. I kept my eyes on him and mouthed something.
“What did you say, peasant?” He growled at me.
“I said: together we chose this path so together we will face its wrath.” I charged towards him and tackled him down, back to the cold ocean.
As we fell, I closed the hole behind me, this time with thicker and harder ice. I stayed still to conserve my oxygen but Chen was frantic. He kept pounding the ice barrier from below while lightning kept striking from above. Every time the ice cracks, I would mend it again. Chen averted his attention to me and clutched my shirt. I shook my head and hugged him. It was just too painful to kill another person. He went still and stiff, probably stunned about what I did. I was crying that moment but I held back my sobs.
I want to tell him many things, things that I wasn’t able to speak out loudly. I want to comfort him, to tell him that everything would be alright even though I knew they won’t. There was a battle inside him and I can’t do anything but watch. He shifted between normal an
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