“I have called this meeting today,” Kai announced, pacing back and forth in his bedroom, “to discuss a grave and serious matter.”

Sehun and Tao stared blankly at him from their seats on D.O’s bed.

“We, as the youngest members of EXO, have been slighted for far too long!”

“That’s not true, we’re probably in the top half of the most popular members,” Tao cut in.

“Shut up, Tao.”

“I thought I was your hyung, though? Aren’t you supposed to respect me?”

“No, we’re the same age.”

“What?”

“Ugh.” Kai shook his head, slapping his palm to his forehead. “You know what, Korean age.”

“Yes, it only makes everyone more confused.” Tao nodded sagely. “So call me hyung.”

“No.”

“I'm leaving.”

Tao rose from the bed and headed for the door, but Kai grabbed his sleeve and pulled him back.

“No. You have to stay. We need your manpower.”

“Don’t you two have enough muscle as it is?” Tao asked, glancing between Kai and Sehun. “What do you need me for?”

“We need your wushu stuff,” Sehun piped up. “For hitting people.”

“No!” Tao shook his head violently, dark strands whipping back and forth. “Wushu is a peaceful martial art! I refuse to—”

“God can you just leave,” Kai sighed, pushing Tao out the door, despite the Chinese man’s protests.

“...anyways,” Sehun said, “what exactly are you going for here?”

“We're going to stage an uprising.”

“Sounds fun. How are we going to do that, though?”

“...I haven’t quite gotten to that, yet.”

~*~*~*~*~

Eventually, the two decided to rebel the quiet way:

By being disobedient s.

“Jongin! Can you do the dishes?” Suho called from the kitchen.

“In a minute,” Kai drawled, paying the leader no heed as he smashed some more buttons on his PSP. “Dammit, Sehun, stop cheating!”

“I'm not cheating!” Sehun protested, flipping his hair out of his eyes as he executed a particularly difficult button combination.

“Sehun! Can you wash the dishes?” Baekhyun yelled, “Jongin's being a useless lump again!”

“I am not a useless lump!” Kai shouted.

“I'm busy!" Sehun cried. "Call back later!”

The two of them rolled their eyes and started a new game, sighing all the while.

~*~*~*~*~

Suho frowned, his arms elbow-deep in soapy water for the third time that week. Why SM wouldn't pay to fix their dishwasher, he didn't understan