When her heart first gets broken, she runs into him drinking alone atop the 5th floor balcony and cursing under his breath for being so naïve and stupid.

It doesn’t take a brain surgeon to figure out that Shim Changmin is heartbroken too—by the way he held his bottle, dangling from his flimsy grip and swirling the liquid around in a dismal manner—but she’s never been close enough to him to really know for sure. That was another doe-eyed girl’s department, and—Oh—suddenly Sooyoung feels a little sick just thinking it.

“How long are you going to stand over there, Sooyoung?” he says, slurring just a little bit. He doesn’t look at her, but he knows she’s there—staring with open and with tears in her eyes—and doesn’t bother to ask what’s wrong. If she was here with him now, crying and wanting to be alone at this small balcony no one ever really goes to—then he didn’t have to ask the question. Changmin knew. He figured he couldn’t be the only one broken by today anyway.

“You could sit down, you know. You’re too tall for this place.”

Sooyoung snorts without meaning to, and covers and nose just as the sound came out. He still doesn’t look at her, and she decides that’s probably best or else she’d see what she knew was exactly mirrored on her face. She shuffles at her feet and shrugs, biting a nail down into her palm as she struggled to find the air to speak.

“Is it wrong to hate them so much right now?” she asks more to herself than to him. She holds on to the railing and leans over the edge, biting her lip. “I mean, she’s my friend and it’s not like we were ever together anyway. It was more one-sided than anything, really.”

“One-sided… right,” he echoes, taking another long gulp from his bottle before setting it down next to two or three more bottles at the side. Sooyoung briefly wonders if Jaejoong had any part on making this maknae such a strong drinker. “It’s all about timing, I think. One second earlier and maybe it wouldn’t have turned out this way.”

“I didn’t know you liked Yoona so much, Changmin-sshi.”

He shrugs, looking up to look at her in the eyes finally. “I didn’t know you liked Kyuhyun so much either, Sooyoung-sshi, but hey – who am I to judge?”

It stings a bit hearing it being said out loud but Sooyoung doesn’t say a word about it. Instead she pulls back and slumps against the wall, bringing her legs up against her chest. She breathes, “They say the simplest way to find happiness is to let the things that make you sad go.”

Changmin doesn’t answer and the silence overtakes them as they stare out into the night sky. Another bottle is forced open and under her nose and she looks up at him. He doesn’t look at her, drinking from his own bottle and there’s something about it that makes her heart reach out for him. She tips her head back as the liquid burned a course down and let out a satisfied sigh.

“To hell with bad timing.” She says, taking about swig and kicking the railing, causing the whole balcony to tremble. Sooyoung squeaks and Changmin laughs despite himself, and the moment dissolves into something considerably lighter.

He looks at her again and nods his head. “To hell with bad timing.”

*

When her heart gets broken the second time (and it’s not even about her really, but Stella is her friend and Stella’s heart is hers as well), she sees him consoling another in his arms just before she disappears into a darkened room and into a familiar terrace.

It surprises her to hear footsteps come closer minutes later and for familiar eyes to come into view. Changmin blinks at her and steps closer, putting a hand over her shoulder and leaning. He still doesn’t know her all that well, but it worries him – seeing tears in her eyes. “You okay?” he asks, tentatively and she cries even more.

“They were so happy and then suddenly it’s over.” She whimpers, embarrassed and confused by her own tears but caring less and less about it as the seconds ticked on. “How is it so easy for anyone to fall out of love like that? That isn’t right.”

“Sometimes it just happens.” He says soothingly but he doesn’t move to hug her or pull her into her arms at all (not