You're P.O.V

„Meekyong eonnie.“ I cried burying my face in her chest. „Shh.. I'm here. I'm by your side. Shh.“ We stayed like that for about ten minutes. I would've cried longer if Meekyong eonnie hadn't pulled me away lightly, so she could face me. „Hwayoung you have to be strong now.“ she said softly „I know eonnie, but I can't.“ I said, while crying and hugged her again. „You have to Hwayoung. But for now I'm here to be strong for you, so for now you can let all of it out. Then you'll feel better. It's okay to cry, so just do it. It helps. It really does help.“ she said and patted my back. After a while my eyelids got heavy and fell asleep.

When I woke up, I found myself in the hospital room once again. I looked around and saw a tray with food, some pills and a glass of water next to me. I heard someone knock on the door and then a worried Meekyong came in. „Oh you're awake already. How are you? I have prepared some pills for you, so you won't have bad headaches and feel tired the whole time.“ „I'm better now. Thanks Meekyong eonnie.“ I forced a little smile and then it was silent. Eonnie stood there looking everywhere only to avoid my eyes. In her eyes I could see sadness, worry and … guilt? I swallowed the pills and drank some water. „You know it isn't your fault.“ She lifted her head and then I could see everything perfectly. Her eyes were red and swollen and she looked tired. Why did she care so much about us? „Meekyong eonnie is everything alright? You look like - “ I couldn't say anything else because eonnie ran to me and hugged me as if her life depended on it. „I'm so sorry Hwayoung. We should have work harder. And the doctor shouldn't tell you this like he did. I'm sorry. I really am. I'm so sorry.“ she cried in my shoulder. Then I felt tears escape my eyes. „Eonnie it isn't your fault.“ I sobbed. Then all that was heard were our sobs. „She's angry with me.“ I said, still sobbing, after a while. „What? Ani Hwayoung. How can she be angry with you?“ „She came to me in a dream, gave me a pistol and asked if I want to stay with her. If it is so, than I have to kill myself. Of course I accepted it and wanted to do it. But – When I pulled the trigger … nothing happened. But eomma was angry with me, because I almost didn't let her wish become true. She's disappointed in me.“ I cried. Meekyong had a shocked expression on her face. „W-What was her wish?“ she asked stuttering. „I have to find my father, who lives with his wife in Seoul.“ „And what will you do now?“ „I'll go to Seoul.“

**A few days later**

The coffin was being lowered. I grabbed some earth and held my hand above the coffin. „I'll do everything to let your wish become true.“ With that I slowly opened my hand and the earth ran through my fingers. It was spitting already and with every second it became worse. After I was ready the men began to bury her. When everything was done and the people began to leave and knelt down and laid her favorite rose on the place where the earth was hilly. „I promise you. I'll find him.“ And again I couldn't help but cry. „Eomma... I'm so sorry I didn't care well enough about you. Eomma...  Please don't be angry at me. I don't want to be alone. I don't have anyone except you. Why did you leave me? You had to tell me earlier about appa. I would've found him and- and then we would've lived together. Everyone would be happy. So why? Why did you leave? How should I tell appa that you're gone? How can I look him in the eyes? He will hate me, because it's all my fault! Eommaaa...“ I knelt there on the wet earth, cried and screamed. I was alone so why should I care someone could here me? Anyway, I thought I was alone, but then I felt two hands on each of my shoulders. „Hwayoung.“ I heard Eunjung's soft voice. „We  should go now. Otherwise you get ill. You're mother wouldn't want you to get sick because of her.“ „Sick? It's nothing compared to what I did to her. Eunjung she died because of me!“

**Eunjung's P.O.V**

Flashback

I stood beside Hwayoung in front of the grave, when someone tapped my shoulder. „Excuse me, can I talk to you?“ a young woman asked me. She looked worried and her eyes were swollen. „Ye, of course.“ We got away from the crowd and stopped under a big tree. „Who are you and what is it you want to talk to me about?“ I asked her. „My name is Meekyong. I took care of Hwayoung and her mother, while they were in the hospital - “ „Meekyong was in the hospital?!“ I asked in disbelieve. I mean if she would just visit her mother then okay I could understand this. But if Meekyong took care of Hwayoung then something happened to her, hadn't it? „Didn't she told you? She fainted a couple of times. But was because of her mother's condition. It's nothing serious. But not what I wanted to tell you.“ „Then what is it?“ „Who are you to Hwayoung?“ I didn't know what this woman wanted but I thought that if I answer her questions she then would tell me what she wanted, so I just answered: „I'm her best friend. Why?“ „Good that means you see her a lot, don't you?“ „Yeah. I see her everyday.“ „I wanted to ask you to take care of her. She's doing very bad. She thinks her mother died because of her and that everybody,whom she does love, hates her. So could you …? „Oh my god. Of course. Poor Hwayoung. I can't even imagine how she's feeling now. But how could that happen? And- And what will she do now? Oh my god. Ms. Kim was like a second mother to me. Why?“ I hid my face in my palms and cried. „Shh. Don't cry. You have to help Hwayoung now. But if she'll see you crying then you won't be able to help her anymore.“ „Yeah you're right.“ „Hwayoung must be lucky to have a friend like you. What's your name by the way?“ „My name is Eunjung.“ „So.. Eunjung are you okay now?“ „Ye.“ I forced a smile. „I have to go now. See you later.“ she said. After that she walked to Hwayoung and said something. Hwayoung only nodded. Then Meekyong hugged her and left. The funeral ended and the people left. Soon there was no one except for one. Hwayoung knelt down and then she began to cry and scream. She screamed something about her.. father?! 'Why didn't she ever told me something about her father? She only told me, that her mother doesn't- didn't want to talk about him.' I decided to take her home.

**End of flashback**

„Eunjung she died because of me!“ „Hwayoung you know it isn't like that. Your mother was ill. And no one, and with that I mean NO ONE, could help her. Not even you. Come on. Let's go home. You're all wet now and me, too.“ I helped her stand up and caught a taxi, which brought us to her house. After we got in, we slipped of our shoes hung up our jackets. „You should take a hot shower. It will make you feel better.“ „Okay. If you want something to eat look in the fridge.“, she said without looking up or even smile. „O..kay.“, I said unsure. We knew each other since we were little and I spent a lot of time at Hwayoung's place. So I felt like I was at home and did whatever I wanted to do. I decided to make something hot to eat. 'Hmm. How about...soup? Yeah. It will warm her up a bit.' I took all ingredients I needed from the fridge and started cooking. Truthfully, I couldn't cook earlier, but Hwayoung taught me how to cook. Her mother used to work from early in the morning to late in the night and sometimes she went to work in the evening and came home in the next afternoon, so it was rarely for her to cook and that's why Hwayoung learned it when she was little. Some day I visited her and then she found out I couldn't cook and showed me how to do it. I learned one meal after another. And if Hwayoung wouldn't be such a good teacher I probably never would learn how to cook.

After an hour the soup was ready and I waited with it and two bowls for Hwayoung, who came five minutes later. „Hwayoung, look I made soup. You maybe do not know anymore, but that's the first meal you showed me. „Why wouldn't I know this anymore. It's very hard to forget what you did with that soup to the kitchen on that day.“, she said remembering what happened.

**Flashback**

„Eunjung, I have to get something from my room.“, Hwayoung said while walking towards the door. „Okay.“ „ I'll be back in a minute. You won't burn down the kitchen in that minute, will you?“, she asked me with a raised brow and a serious voice. „I'll try to to not burn down your kitchen.“ I responded laughing. „Good. Don't forget to stir it, okay?“, she asked without expecting an answer and walked away smiling. After she was gone I took away the top of the pot and inhaled this wonderful smell. „Mhh... It smells delicious.“ Then I closed the pot and sat down on a chair and looked out the window being hypnotized by the smell and forgetting everything. I daydreamed and in my dream there were only the soup and me jumping and running through a field with the pot in my hands until... a scream brought me back to reality: „Oh my god!“ I jumped from the chair and realized that the soup was running out from the pot and on to the stove and floor. And with every second the kitchen was being filled with white smoke. „Eunjung, what happened?“ „Oh, I- ahem- I- I forgot about the soup and-“ „Okay we'll talk about it later now we have to deal with this disaster. Take away the lid of the pot and I'll open the window.“, she said like if we were i the army. „Okay chef.“ I said putting my hand to my head and standing straight. Then I went to the pot and wanted to open it, but I accidentally met a glass with water with my hand and caused it to fall. Now on the floor wasn't only the soup but water, too. Hwayoung didn't open the window, yet, because she needed longer than me to get to her destination. „Eunjung, what did you do?“ „I accidentally broke a glass and the water is now on the floor, too. I'm sorry Hwayoung“ „It's okay as long as you aren't hurt. Go and open the window and I'll clean the mess up.“ „Oh. Okay.“ I said relieved, because I couldn't do anything wrong while opening a window, could I?“ I walked to the window and tried to open it, but it wouldn't even budge, so I tried with more force and it flew open and caused me to stumble backwards and hit a flowerpot. It fell down and broke, too. „Oh no.Please!“, I prayed „EUNJUNG?!“ „Y-Yeah, H-Hwayoung?“ I asked quietly stuttering. „What did you do now?“ „Me? Oh I did ahem.“ „Yeah, what did you do?“ 'Should I tell her? She will be really mad at me if I do. But she doesn't have to know everything, does she? And the sound of the breaking pot wasn't that loud, too. I just tell her that..' „There probably happened something outside, because I did nothing.“ I grabbed the broom and shovel and cleaned half of the place where the flowerpot was, while Hwayoung was busy cleaning up the mess I made at the stove and on the floor. And with a swift move the shovel was empty and we heard... „WHAT THE HELL?!“ I looked out the window. There was a guy looking furious. Of course.. Why wouldn't he be furious his hair was full with earth. He scanned the region to find out who made this and I ducked as quickly as possible. And the didn't find anyone, that's when Hwayoung came to the window and asked me what happened. „Shh.. be quiet and duck!“, I whispered and pulled her down. „What's going on? What is the earth doing on the floor. Wait a minute it  is... It's from the flowerpot, isn't it?“ „Hwayoung I'm sorry. I'll clean up everything.“ I began to pick up the broken pieces and cut my finger. „Ouch!“ „Eunjung! Don't say me you cutted yourself, please!“ „Okay, I won't tell you about it.““Oh my god. Eunjung! Come on. You have to clean the wound, so no dirt is in it. And then I get you a sticking plaster. 

**End of flashback**

„Oh yeah. I'm sorry for that.“, I said embarrassed and looked down at my food. „I hope the kitchen is okay after your today's soup.“, she said. „Hwayoung...! I'm not like that anymore. I'm more careful now!“, I whined and then I noticed it. There was something in her face. 'Oh my god! Is that a smile?!'