Dear Diary,

I just read my last ebtry entry, and there are SO many mistakes! I guess it was because I was rushing, but still. I don't like making mistakes. It makes me feel stupid if I keep messing things up. Sure, I may smile and laugh when I mess up on stage, but I that's because I'm embarrassed. I feel a pang in my heart and in my stomach. My eyes tear up, but I keep them at bay. I don't like letting other people know that I am upset. 

Oh yeah! So I was at the first Milk meeting earlier today. Leeteuk hyung told us that he will try to reach out to idols outside of our company as well, and that he has already spoken to G-Dragon sunbae. He said that he would call in every once in a while and help us, since he already got help from a therapist a while ago. It's nice knowing that someone as successful as him has gone through this. He said that he'll try, but that right now he's working on BIGBANG's Japanese album. I actually can't wait to hear it. I like BIGBANG sunbaes' work. 

The rest of SHINee are acting the same as usual, but there's a tight air around the dorm. They seem cautious. I don't want them walking on egg shells. If it doesn't feel better by the end of the week, I'll talk to them one by one. Except Key, he's acting normal and comfortable. If anything, he feels suffocated by the other members as well.

Sincerely,
    Jinki Lee