“He cried, Jesse,” Yoona told her best friend then sighed, sitting back on her chair and crossing her arms, a glum look on her face. “Do you know I never once saw him cry for Yul Jr.? Not once the entire time he was in the hospital and not even after he died,” she said softly.

Jesse took a deep breath. “He cried, Yoona,” he informed her.

“How do you know?” Yoona asked.

Jesse sighed. “Because my house was the one he came to when he needed to break down and I was the one who was there with him in New York when he’d get drunk and pour his heart out,” he told her as he stirred the pasta on top of the stove.

Yoona swallowed past the lump that had formed in . “How often did he cry?” she asked.

“I really think that this is a conversation you should be having with your husband,” Jesse said pointedly, turning around and leaning against the counter so he was facing her.

“Don’t call him that,” Yoona snapped.

“Why not? Are you in denial?

“No, I’m living in Reality Ville,” she said. “Yul and I haven’t been husband and wife for a long time.”

Jesse rolled his eyes. “Are we really back to this again?” he asked.

“I didn’t know we left it,” she muttered.

“Look, Yoona. I’m the only one who knows what Yul was like after he left, because I was the only one who was there,” he said bluntly.

Ouch, Yoona thought.

“You have no idea how many nights he spent crying into his whiskey. You have no idea how many bars I had to drag him out of and it wasn’t all because of your son, Yoona. Your leaving had a lot to do with it!”

“Jesse I don’t want to hear this!” Yoona said. It almost sounded to him like she was begging.

“Maybe you need to, Yoona. Maybe it’s time you see this through Yul’s eyes!” Jesse yelled at her.

Yoona shook her head. “No, no I don’t want to,” she said desperately.

“Why not?” Jesse pressed.

“Because if I look at this through Yul’s eyes, I won’t like what I see in me!” she finally yelled back, her voice full of hurt.

“He cried, Yoona,” Jesse said again, returning to their original subject.

“Jesse…”

“And he felt a tremendous amount of guilt.”

Yoona’s eyes snapped up to Jesse. “What?” she asked her voice filled with astonishment. “Jesse… Yul Jr. had leukaemia. There was nothing Yul could have done!”

Jesse shook his head, and turning the burner off on the stove, he came to sit down across from Yoona. He took her hands in his. “Not for that, Yoona. I mean, a little for that too, but…” Jesse took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t even tell you this,” Jesse whispered.

She squeezed his hands so tight that her knuckles turned white. “No, Jesse, you can’t do that. You have to tell me.”

Jesse sighed. “He wouldn’t cry in front of you, because he felt he needed to be strong for you and he… felt guilty because… because he was the one holding Yul Jr. when he died.”

“What?” Yoona whispered. “He told you all this? When?”

“On one of his benders,” Jesse said, remembering his brother’s emotional state at the time. It was never apparent when Yul had been sober; he’d hidden it well, but when he was drunk, all his walls had come down. “He felt like he… took something from you.”

“But he didn’t!” Yoona protested. “Yul Jr. was his son, too, Jesse.”

“I know that, Yoona, but you were his wife and you shut down after Yul Jr. died. Is it any wonder Yul was blaming himself? Justified or not?”

Yoona’s eyes immediately filled with remorse.

Jesse sighed again. “I’m not saying it was your fault, Yoona. You guys weren’t there for each other. Yoona, if you guys could talk through this, maybe you could work things out,” he said.

Yoona’s eyes snapped up to Jesse. “No, Jesse, that’s not what I’m here for.”

“When are you going to stop running away, Yoona?”

“Jesse, I just don’t know…”

“Then stop thinking about it!” He exploded. “Yul made a mistake, yes, and walking away from you after Yul Jr. died is the top of the list, but you walked away from him, too. For the tour or do you even remember that?” he said scathingly.

“That was different.”

“How?” Jesse demanded.

“I… I was young and stupid,” she said, defending herself.

“So was he,” Jesse said, sticking up for his brother.

Yoona’s eyes filled with tears and she shook her head. “You know what one of the best things about best friend is?” she asked.

“What?”

“They’re honest with you,” she said dryly.

“Right,” Jesse agreed. “One more thing, Yoong, you’re my best friend, and I love you, but if you’re going to just break my brother’s heart, then you should probably just leave now,” he said solemnly.

Yoona took a deep breath. “Jesse, he knows I’m leaving when I’m all healed. I’ve not mislead him in any way.”

Jesse laughed sarcastically. “Do you think that’s going to stop him from falling more in love with you?” he asked.

Yoona took a deep breath. “I can’t control his emotions, Jesse.”

Jesse stood up and returned to the stove, knowing this conversation needed to come to an end. After straining the macaroni, he put the cheese, butter and milk in and stirred it all together. He made them each bowl and went back to the table. “Thank you,” Yoona said softly.

 “You’re welcome,” Jesse said.

“And thanks for bringing me to the doctors today. It’s nice not having that cast on anymore,” she said, looking down at her boots. She liked it much better than the plaster cast she’d had on for the last three weeks. Since she’d woken up in the hospital, it had driven her crazy, but she’d healed fast, and the doctor had agreed that this would be okay for her.

“Yeah, just don’t forget to stay off your feet,” Jesse reminded her.

Yoona grinned mischievously. “I’ll try,” she said. “But honestly, I just want to go for a run!”

“You don’t run.”

“Well, I want to start,” she said, taking a big bite of her macaroni and cheese.

Jesse and Yoona finished their lunch with minimal conversation, and then he left. Yoona knew that all was okay with them, that he’d just been looking out for his brother. It increased her respect for him that he was willingly to do that, protecting his brother even at the cost of being brutally honest with her. His words had hurt, but she knew why.

Everything he’d said had been true.

Yoona finished the dishes, spending a little time on her feet to do it, and had just put The Notebook in the DVD player when the phone rang. She looked at the caller id and smiled. “Hello?” she said into the phone.

“I did it,” Yul told her.

“You signed with them!” she exclaimed.

“I did,” he said.

“Oh, Yul, that’s so great. Did they give you what you wanted?” she asked.

“They gave me what I was willing to settle for. It was a lot less than what the Knicks offered, but the perks here are going to be much better,” he said.

“I’m so glad for you,” she said sincerely. “I know how much you wanted this.”

“Yup, the only thing is I need to go back to New York tomorrow for a few days. They’re going to hold a press conference to announce my signing.”

“Why New York?” she asked surprised at the disappointment she felt at his having to go away.

“Because I’m technically still a Knicks player,” he said. “For two more weeks.”

“Oh,” she said. She wasn’t sure what the significance was, because she’d never been legally savvy, but she was sure that legalities somehow played into it. “Are you on your way home?” she asked.

“Yes,” he told her. “I’m just leaving Charlotte, so I should be home around 7,” he told her. “I just stopped off to grab something to eat before I got on the highway. How was your doctor’s appointment?”

“Good,” Yoona told him. “But I’m sorry to report that I’ve already shaved my leg,” she said.

“Oh, damn,” he teased. “I wanted to be there for that.”

“Maybe next time,” she said laughing.

“No,” Yul said firmly, any trace of humour now gone. “There will never be a next time for that, Yoona. I’m not sure if I could take it,” he told her honestly.

Yoona laughed. “I’ll do my best to make sure it doesn’t happen,” she said.

“Good,” he said. “So, I’ll see you in a few hours?”

“I’ll be here,” she said.

“Okay, bye, Yoong,” he said softly.

“Bye Yul and congratulations.”

“Thanks,” he said.