I rushed to my car as I sent him a message, my heart breaking with every step I take. Upon reaching my car, I took my phone out again, contacting her. I waited for her to pick up…

"Hello?" I could tell she did her best to sound like she was okay, but I know better. I noticed the way her voice slightly cracked and the way she was breathing seemed far too difficult for her. I closed my eyes as pain washed over my whole being.

"Dara," I called out. "Let's have dinner tonight, alone."

"Okay, pick me up?"

I felt another pang in my heart as I noticed how she tried so hard to make it as if she was excited.

"I'm on my way,"

I didn't let her answer for I couldn't take anymore of her pretending. 

I love her. God knows how much I do, but this is wrong. Too many people are hurting.

I love him too. Brothers for life – even if we were the exact opposite, I love him. Just seeing him the way he looked as he recalled what happened a year ago was unbearable for me.

I want them to be happy… even if it means having me out of the picture.

I sped away to Dara's house, with thoughts running wildly as I prepared myself for what's about to happen. I slowed down as her house came into view. I parked my car and rang the doorbell. She opened it.

There was a smile on her lips the moment she opened the door. She tiptoed to give me a kiss and I bent my head down to meet her lips. She wasn't quite ready yet.

"I just need to go and get changed," she stated as she pulled me upstairs to her room. She placed me down on the soft mattress of her bed, and then turned to her walk in closet. She picked out a red dress and skipped her way to the bathroom.

I took my phone out and keyed a message to Jiyong, letting him know where I was going to meet him.

Dara came out minutes later with a smile on her face… she looked happy, but then I saw something in her eyes that contradicted that smile.

"You look beautiful as always,"

We were now walking to the restaurant – a different one to the one we went to for lunch. I lead her to the VIP room we were going to be in with my fingers tangled with hers.

I opened the door and ushered her in.

"Hyung," I looked up to see Jiyong standing up with shock evident in his face.

I smiled at him and pulled Dara to the table. I looked at her and she seemed to be shocked too. Then her face turned serious.

"What is he doing here?" She turned to me and I flinched. She has never spoken to me that way, nor did she ever look at me like that.

"Sit," I levelled her coldness. If this was the only way to make them listen, I will gladly do it. "You too Ji," I looked at him straight in the eyes and he complied.

Silence.

I watched them shoot laser beams with each other and I sighed.

"Dara," I called out to the girl beside me and she turned to me with a smile on her lips with her eyes glazed with wonder. "I want to cancel the wedding,"

She gasped. Her eyes starting to water now and I looked away. She didn't say anything but he did.

"Hyung, you can't do that," he said, his voice filled with worry.

"Yes I can Ji, and I will."

There was another round of silence.

"Kwon Jiyong," she was the one to break it. I looked at her. I saw pure hatred in her eyes. "I loathe you,"

I saw a tear drop from her eyes but she violently wiped it away. I looked at Ji, who bowed his head from defeat and shame.

Fiery rage washed over me.

"Why Dara?" I spoke, she stiffened and Jiyong looked up. She didn't say anything. "Why do you loathe him so much? He cheated on you? Do you even know the story? Had it ever considered you that maybe he was telling the truth?"

"No, it wasn't anything like that was it?" I shook my head. Tears were uncontrollably flowing out of her eyes as she watched me. I ignored the gnawing pain in my chest with that image of her. I needed to do this. It's the only way.

Pretend? I don't think I could no longer do it. I want her to be happy.

"No," I continued as I shook my head. "You ran away because you were too scared. Too scared to commit to someone like him. Too scared that in the end he might leave you, so you left him even before he could," I felt my tears coming.

"Dara, do you even know you dream of him every night? Huh? You call his name every damn night. Do you know how much that hurts? For me to have to pretend every morning that I was the one you truly love?"

"Tab-" she tried to call out to me but I cut her off.

"Save it," I spat out. "You were too in love with the idea of having a perfect man, well guess what I'm not perfect. Nobody is," I looked at Ji, his eyes wide with shock.

'Yes Ji, she still loves you… but I was the selfish one. I kept her to myself even when I knew that she didn't feel anything for me but she fell in love with the way I treated her.'

I turned my gaze to her; she was shaking with her head bowed down.

"I thought, if I kept you to myself, you'd learn to love me… but I guess I was wrong… right Dara?" She was shaking her head protesting with what I'm saying.

I stopped talking and all that was heard was the silent tears Ji shed accompanied by her loud cries.

'After this, I promise you, you'll shed no more tears… You'll be together again.'

"Hyu-" Ji spoke but I cut him off and turned to him.

"And you," I met his eyes. "Why didn't you run to her huh? Why didn't you look for her!? You call her a coward? You're a hypocrite."

Tears, I tasted them – salty and bitter just the way I feel.

"You didn't run after her, all because you thought you were a disappointment. Have you ever thought that maybe she didn't care? That she was proud that you've changed. You were affected with the fact that people gave you a name. A reputation. G-Dragon. You are not that bastard. You are Kwon Jiyong!"

He stood up trying to stop me.

I want to.

But I can't.

"Go, tell her," I tilted my head to her direction.

"You guys let your insecurities get to you but you know what the worse thing about that? It's because you guys are too wimp to admit it that it has gone too far to blaming each other."

I calmed myself as I closed my eyes. I was panting. So many emotions swirling inside me. Disappointment. Sadness. Rage. Pain. But most of all, I felt Love, the love for both of them was stronger.

I would rather watch them happy together because that way I still get to keep them… If I chose one, I would lose the other.

"So do me a favour," I gave them a smile and they looked at me with sadness.

'Don't be sad, I'm doing this for you.'

"Be happy for me,"

I ran to the door and locked it.

I leaned my head on the door as I felt my heart split in two – one filled with sadness and one filled with content.

I could hear the pounding from the other side of the door. They were calling my name.

I walked away not looking back.

I didn't have the courage.

'It's time to look for my happiness'

Okay, I'm not completely satisfied with this...