Keep you

Chiao's Notebook

Everyone leaves.

I wish you'd stayed.

 

I can't keep any of you. But I don't want to let you go. That would be selfish. So instead I let you linger in my closet. This way I can visit you any time I'd like.

 

Letting you go completely means losing what little of you my mind clings to. I can see you when I close my eyes, and when I need someone to talk to. If I let you go entirely I'll forget your face. I'll forget your touch. I'll forget your sweet voice.

This happens over and over again. Once was enough. Why do I allow my closet to fill up one skeleton at a time? I thought i was saving space for you. Then I made room for you and you too. Now it's a ghostly harem. I'm no playboy, why won't you all stop fighting for my attention? You're all special to me. I don't want you to compete.

What would you all do if I suddenly met someone with whom I'd want to spend a lot of time with? Would there be more fighting? Would you fight her and try to drag her into that closet prematurely? She wouldn't be your's. Not your plaything.

 

Perhaps the closet is boring and I don't take you out to play often enough. But you can't have her. I want this one to stick around.

I don't want to ask you to leave but if you could for once give me the space I need to form bonds with new people, that would mean I get to keep all of you close. Would that be too much to ask? I want you to stay. But you have to set me free. Then maybe I can return the favor.

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!
missterious
a new leaflet from Chiao's book goes up in 3...2...1...

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
C_a_r_o_LL
#1
this story is awesome!!!
KauType #2
Chapter 25: Tea is no Substitute makes me think. Was Chiao thinking of Hong Hua or of Carol when she wrote this one? Maybe the lines were even blurred? Both girls left Chiao. Though her girlfriend left in "slumber" by her own death, Carol left when Chiao was kind of sleeping-ish, right? Sniffle, can I hug Chiao now?
soupah #3
Chapter 24: Yes! New Chapter! More HongHua. Always HongHua. Poor Chiao :(
soupah #4
Will you be updating this with new entires any time soon?
therries #5
Whaaat?? Naughty deleted scenes?!?? Lol you've got my attention! XD I can't wait to read that! I'll be reading the rest of your stories in the meantime. I love your writing! <3
missterious
#6
@therries thanks so much! welllll i dunno if you read rated fics but there IS a rated offshoot in the works. basically the so-called 'deleted scenes' that i decided to leave out to have the fic rating more nc17/pg than xxx :) so if that's something you might enjoy, stay tuned!! and chiao's notebook is ongoing, so you'll still be able to be in chiao's head for a while ;)
therries #7
I just finished Nerds, Dorks and Jerks <3 I love that you continued on with this offshoot of Chiao's Notebook! It was nice to see her perspective and emotions during certain events in the main story. I wish it didn't end though!!! lol I would have happily just kept reading chapter after chapter X3