Disclaimer: I don’t own CL or GD, they are the property of YGE and I do not make any profit from writing this story.

A/N: I don’t have much to say here but this chapter came to me in a dream since I went to be right after writing Chapter 4. Enjoy and keep the comments coming.

“I feel my husband still with me, even though I look at his ashes everyday. I know he’s dead but I know he is here still.” A woman spoke as she pushed her ratty dark hair from her face with Ji-Yong sitting besides her. In the center of the circle was the head psychiatrist who was taking notes of everyone’s stories. This has become part of Ji-Yong’s everyday now that Se7en had called YG to straighten him out. But there was no way that what he was going through meant he was going insane. Hell they were pumping him full of drugs for the past few days since he wasn’t allowed to go home until he “makes progress” and he could still hear her voice and see her face come visit him in this hellhole.

“Mr. Kwon, why don’t you share your story about your girlfriend? Since this will be your last session.” The man asked looking up from his clipboard and gave him a reassuring smile as Ji-Yong smiled back but smugly because he had been playing all of them like fools. His girlfriend was alive and so was his daughter and they were probably really upset that he had to leave them again.

“Chaerin is gone and I have accepted that. Sure I still see her through my memories but that’s all they are. Just memories and I know that no matter how much I beg I know she won’t be able to come back and that I will also never be a father.” He answered coldly and he could see the woman besides him twitch from his tone. “I’m happy to go home and test out what I have learned here, there.” And with that he stood up to leave the group without much else to say and a few people waved good by while others only looked away from the star. They still felt weird that a singer had needed help like them.

Going up to his room in the center he grabbed what little he was allowed to bring and there at the door waiting for him was Chaerin holding their baby in the little car seat carrier. “Ready to go home, love?” She asked and Ji-Yong nodded and kissed her lips as he held her hand and they left together.

“Chaerin, thank you for still coming to visit me. I’m not crazy right?” he asked as they walked down the hallway together. There were patients coming out of their room, some looking strange while others did weird things… doctors and residents trying to usher them back to where they need to be.

“They gave you medicine everyday to make you “better” right? And if you were crazy I would no longer be here because of the drug’s effects. But here I am carrying Chai and holding your hand.” She reasoned and gripped his hand tighter in a squeeze to ease his thoughts. Her answer made him smile as he nodded and helped Chaerin put the baby seat into its little place in the center of the backseat. “You’re okay to drive right? I need to be in the back with Chai.” Chaerin asked as she sat down in the seat.

“I’ll be fine. I just want to get back home. They gave me so many different pills for me to take. I’m not happy about it.” He sighed and closed Chaerin’s door before going to the other side to get into the driver’s seat. Once buckled up he the car and turned around in the seat to back out of the space.

“I know baby but you have to take them. Everyone just wants you to be okay.” Chaerin answered as she made faces at little Chai, the baby’s laughter filling up the car as they drove away from the rehabilitation center.

“Pills are for crazy people, Chaerin. I shouldn’t have to take them when you’re really here. What if the stuff actually messes me up? Why should I really take them?” He asked her and she shook her head while she made more faces and played peek-a-boo.

“Because the doctors told you to. What if you don’t take them and YG finds out? What will you do when they send you away again?” She asked, extending her hand to Chai who took her hand in hers and lightly on Chaerin’s manicured finger. The car ride got eerily quiet after that and the only sound that resonated in the SUV was the sound of Chai’s ling on her mother’s fingers and the occasion loud breathing from her.

Once back at the YG apartment complex, Ji-Yong opened the door and helped Chaerin out who thanked him and headed up the stairs first with Chai in her arms, leaving the car seat inside the car for Ji-Yong to grab after unhooking it. Putting the empty car seat on the top of his rolling suitcase and holding the handles he started to pull it to the apartments before all of Big Bang and 2NE1 came out to greet him. “Jingyo! How are you feeling? … What’s with the car seat?” Minzy asked having run over first and Ji-Yong smiled.

“It’s a reminder of the hole in my heart from the loss of my daughter. But it helps with the healing of my heart. That though I am alone, they are watching me.” He answered calmly and popped two of the anxiety pills into his mouth and swallowing. Ji-Yong wanted to show them that he was taking them as directed.

“Hey, we have a gift for you. We never thought you were crazy though. Just missed her the most is all.” Sandara responded as she held Young Bae’s hand and Bom was holding an urn. A black but gold decorated urn none the less. “You told us to keep it away from you the day it happened… and told us to keep it. But we think that maybe it would good to have a reminder and proof that she is no longer with us.” She continued and took the urn from Bom and handed it to him.

Ji-Yong looked at the urn for a long time wanting to smash it on the pavement and walking away to lock himself up inside his apartment with Chaerin who was obviously still alive. He didn’t want to bring this with him to the apartment but he put it into the car seat for an easier time to bring it up. “Thank you. But I think I should get going. It has been awhile since I have laid in my own bed… or used my own bathroom. I think I need some time alone.” Ji-Yong responded softly and walked through Seung Hyun and Daesung to the front of their apartment complex to go into the elevator.

“Hyung! Please don’t hesitate to talk to us. We’re here for a reason!” Seungri called out after him and looked to his friends. “Do you think we pushed it too quickly?” He muttered and looked at his noona who shrugged.

“Who knows… but he needs to know that there is proof that she is gone. That her body is gone.” Sandara responded and sighed as she and Young Bae walked together back towards the apartment complex with everyone around them. All the members undecided on what to do but they had followed what Ji-Yong’s psychiatrist had asked them to do.

Ji-Yong went up to his apartment and slammed the front door open and closed as he tossed the car seat from its spot on top of his suitcase. The urn rolling onto the carpeted floor without shattering since it was a well made and made of thick porcelain. Chaerin rushed into the room with an angry expression. “Ji-Yong! Can you please be quieter? Chai is finally resting. She hasn’t had a decent rest since you were in that place!” She called out and looked to him, her expression changed into a saddened and solemn one. “Hey… what’s wrong? Did the guys greet you and say something?” She asked and made her way closer to him. Ji-Yong was crying and sitting on the floor… angry at the urn for not breaking. Reminding him of things he wished he didn’t. Before she got any closer to him though she saw the urn and made a face 

“Ji… who died?”