“Are we going to Aeri’s?” Jimin asked out loud, and she heard Ningning stopping from her movements. She has been asking the same question for the past three days, as if it was not part of her routine to go to the girl’s cafe. But this time, it was different - because somehow, Jimin was nervous in going to the cafe and yet, she’s expecting someone to greet her - the same person that would pester her for the past two weeks.

 

“If you just want to ask if Minjeong will be there, then I don’t know unnie.” Ningning said and continued organizing her bag. She glanced at the older girl, the way she released a disappointed sigh made Ningning shake her head. “You really did say pretty hurtful words, unnie. You can’t blame her.”

 

“I know,” Jimin said, putting her head down, biting her lips - disappointed in herself again for how she was not careful with her own words. “That’s why I want to apologize.”

 

Ningning could only breathe out, she could literally feel Jimin’s disappointment. She did message Aeri on Minjeong’s whereabouts - it’s really hard not to notice Minjeong missing with her pretty playful self. Even the other regulars became close to her with her personality.

 

“Aeri said she’s just visiting some places that she and the others recommended to Minjeong,” Ningning shared to Jimin, “Saying something about making her travel expense here worth it.” she shrugged, and it seemed like Jimin understood Aeri’s words with the way she nodded her head. The instant relief was evident, probably an assurance that Minjeong is in fact, not avoiding her.

 

Despite not talking to Minjeong, she couldn’t help but to listen to the girl’s stories - and she did mention that she’s there to have a vacation but in her words, she was just forced to work in Aeri’s cafe by the girl. “Do you know when she’ll come back?” she carefully asked, hoping not to sound desperate.

 

But of course, Ningning caught Jimin’s tone - they’ve been friends for too long for the younger girl not to know every change in her voice. Jimin wanted to slap Ningning when she heard the latter snickering at her. “Sorry to say but I don’t. And stop about Minjeong now - “

 

“I’m not talking about Minjeong.” Jimin quickly cuts her off, a defensive tone evident in her voice.

 

Ningning simply stared at the girl incredulously, rolling her eyes and completely ignoring Jimin. “Anyway, did you forget your doctor’s appointment?”

 

Jimin sighed, of course she didn’t forget the dreadful appointment that she would have every month. She doesn’t even know why Ningning still insists on going to that appointment of hers - it’s already been a year and obviously, there was still no progress. And every month, she is reminded of the fact that Jimin will never see the world again as before.

 

That her world now consists of darkness - and it always breaks her every time she’s reminded of it.

 

“Can we not go?” Jimin said, standing up from her seat as she walked towards her kitchen. Her apartment is the only place she feels at peace, with her not constantly holding her cane - an object that would give a message to people, and Jimin would feel the stares out of pity. “We’re just going to waste our time.”

 

“It’s not a waste of time if it’s about your progress.”

 

Jimin clenched her jaw, opening the refrigerator that she never moved since then - she knows that Ningning already prepared her tumbler for her. She grabbed it to take a sip, just anything to stall them from going out. “You could clearly tell that there’s none.” she muttered under her breath but Ningning heard it.

 

“Unnie…” she trailed off, “just, I’ll be waiting outside, okay?” she said gently and walked out of the apartment. Ningning knows that Jimin wanted to be alone for a few minutes, this has always been the case whenever they would go to her monthly appointment. There’s no use in talking everything out with Jimin - the girl has her own way of processing things, and Ningning knows that Jimin would talk to her whenever she’s ready.

 

As Jimin heard her front door closing, she took a deep breath - grabbing the counter as she leaned her weight on it. There it was again, the way she just doesn’t want anyone to be with her right now - the way her body craves isolation just to feel her emotions at that moment.

 

The frustration of going out and being reminded by her accident, only to hear the same words that she has been hearing for the past 12 months.

 

The pain of the memory that will forever be engraved in her soul - a huge turning point in her life. A point that she never thought she would experience, and it is not for the better.

 

And then emptiness.

 

Because above all that Jimin feels, deep inside she felt empty. A void that she accepted that she could never fill again. She knows that she’s in her room, as she holds the single object that she could never live without - but that was before. She gripped it, as she felt tears running down her face. She lost her passion, her dream, and her parents - and soon enough, her will to live and heal withered away as well.

 

Darkness became her friend, a companion that she never wanted - and yet it stayed. The only thing that stayed with Jimin, and the constant reminder that she will never be the same. She hated it, she wanted it to stop - but she knows that she couldn’t do just that. That would be too selfish of her - and yet she wanted to be selfish.

 

Gently putting what she was holding down, Jimin grabbed her cane in exchange - Ningning must be waiting long enough for her. She slowly walked out of her apartment and as expected, Ningning hooked their arms as usual. “I’ve heard that Minjeong will be at the cafe, you want to go there right after?”

 

And for the first time since the girl arrived, Jimin didn’t realize the way her heart suddenly felt light with the mention of the girl’s name. She smiled at Ningning, nodding her head. “Yeah, sure. I’d love that.”

 

The two went on their way, but Jimin was only looking forward to the time that they’ll go to the cafe. Hoping to hear that annoying voice again that would talk to her nonstop, and hoping to apologize properly to her. Somehow, she couldn’t bear to hear the way Minjeong’s voice sounded that night - it hit way too close to Jimin.

 

And Aeri’s words echoed inside her. She’s an orphan.

 

But even before that, Jimin regretted her words the moment she heard Minjeong’s voice - cold, emotionless, and it sent shivers down to Jimin’s spine. A stark contrast to how Minjeong always sounded so soft and warm whenever she talks to her, a voice full of emotion.

 

Jimin hoped to hear that again, and maybe - a wishful thinking to see what the girl looks like. After all, Minjeong is a new person in her everyday life. Jimin couldn't deny that she’s curious with what the girl looks like - and there it was again, the silent whispers of the darkness inside her. It caused her to immediately stop her thoughts, and focused on how Ningning drove the car.

 

“Wake me up when we get there.” She said softly, as she closed her eyes - engulfing herself with nothing but darkness.

 

 

It was almost past lunch when Jimin and Ningning arrived at the cafe, the ride back was pure silence - just the usual silence whenever Jimin would go back from her check up. It’s not like there’s something new, and somehow - she would always feel disappointed even when she already knows what to expect. And so, entering the cafe, they were both welcomed by Sakura with a smile.

 

“You’re late today,” Sakura said as she walked them to their usual table “The usual?”

 

Jimin quietly sat down, not bothering to remove her sunglasses as Ningning answered for them. The solemn and quiet music playing around the cafe drowned her ears, putting her palm down on the familiar surface of the table. Jimin could feel the wooden table, and she could remember how smooth it was when she first visited the cafe. But now, she could feel how worn it was - the  familiar scratches that she made whenever she felt anxious as she stayed in the cafe.

 

Jimin wonders if there were changes in the cafe - it’s been a year since she last saw it.

 

“Unnie, I had mine as a to-go. I need to be somewhere, are you okay here?” Ningning said, and Jimin nodded her head.

 

This has been their routine for months now, and Jimin’s grateful that the younger girl understood Jimin that she needed space. The first few months after the accident, Ningning would never leave Jimin’s side - the girl would be attentive to Jimin’s needs anytime of the day. Aeri and the others would also visit her in her apartment as it was the time that Jimin would never want to leave her own space.

 

Jimin felt suffocated with all of their attention on her, and she’s aware that they’re just worried but Jimin couldn’t stand. She felt sorry for herself, the way she would be a burden to everyone around her ever since her accident. That’s why she’s grateful for Ningning and the others to understand what Jimin needed - she learned to be independent even with her condition. It was difficult to begin with, but somehow, she managed to have a routine that suits her.

 

And in the process, Jimin built a wall around her.

 

Just then, the two of them heard Sakura, “Hey, here’s your order Ning. Jimin’s order will be on its way, they’re still prepping it in the kitchen.”

 

Jimin smiled, “Yeah, okay. Thanks, Sakura.”

 

“I’ll get going now, just call me when you need something, okay?” Sakura said and smiled at the two attending to some other customers. Ningning smiled as thanks, and took a sip from her drink - groaning in satisfaction. She noticed how Jimin kept on tapping on the table, one of the signs that the girl is getting bored. Also, it didn’t escape Ningning whenever Jimin would tilt her head to the sound of someone’s voice - as if expecting a certain person.

 

She smirked at the girl, shaking her head. “Hey, I’ll get going now. I need to be there in 45 minutes.” she announced, standing up from her seat as she grabbed her keys. “Call me when you need something, hm?”

 

Jimin simply hummed, the both of them knew that the older girl wouldn’t even bother using her phone. “Take care on your way.”

 

Ningning smiled and gave the older girl a hug, whispering something in Jimin’s ear making the latter blush. “I’ll personally ask them to have Minjeong serve your order.”

 

“Shut up, go on your way.”

 

“You’ll thank me for this.” Ningning chuckled, walking away quickly when she noticed Jimin was grabbing her cane - probably to smack Ningning with it. “I’ll get going now, love you unnie!”

 

Jimin shakes her head at Ningning’s antics, breathing out as she puts her hand on her cheek - feeling its warmth with what the younger girl said to her. Jimin doesn’t even know why she reacted that way, is it because of the way Ningning about it, or the way she was too obvious on looking for Minjeong’s voice? Well, it’s not like Jimin didn’t owe the girl an apology from their last interaction.

 

And until now, she hasn’t heard Minjeong’s voice inside the cafe - Jimin would know whenever the girl’s around. She didn’t realize it until earlier that she could very much tell Minjeong’s distinct voice - and her scent. The scent that would always drown her senses, that she could distinguish from miles away.

 

It reminds her of the warm summer breeze, and yet there would always be a hint of rain - or the smell of ocean beneath it. Somehow, it transports Jimin to an open space whenever Minjeong’s scent would drown her - as if she’s out in the open, all by herself and Minjeong. A place where the land and sea meets.

 

And maybe, despite having a scowl on her face, Jimin couldn’t deny that she felt comfort in the girl’s presence.

 

 

 

 

Minjeong was in the kitchen when she saw Jimin and Ningning entering the cafe, seeing how Sakura welcomed them and led them to their usual table. She watched them for a few seconds before diverting her gaze somewhere else, and she caught Kazuha looking at her with a raised eyebrow. Obviously, the younger girl saw the two as well just judging from the teasing glint on her eyes.

 

“What?”

 

“I didn’t even say anything!”

 

Minjeong just laughed at the girl’s defensiveness, watching how Kazuha finished the sandwich for Jimin. She proceeded to do the girl’s fruit shake, the loud blender being heard in the kitchen. It’s been three days since she last saw Jimin, and the moment Minjeong saw the girl entering the cafe - she felt nervous and yet happy. Nervous as she contemplated if she should talk to the girl again like before, given that they left things on a bad note.

 

Happy because - just because. Even Minjeong couldn’t explain it to herself, but she couldn’t deny the happiness she felt when she saw Jimin. She even felt herself smiling at how Jimin talked to Ningning, as it seemed like the younger girl was teasing Jimin. It wasn’t the intense kind of happiness, the type where people would jump out of excitement. It was the type that quietly and slowly bloomed inside Minjeong whenever she spent time with Jimin - despite her doing all the talking.

 

It was that contentment with what she has right now with the girl, and she’s not even sure - but being with Jimin really made Minjeong’s life a little bit lighter. But she couldn’t explain why, it’s just as it is.

 

Then as if on cue, Kazuha slid a tray in front of her. A sandwich and cold drink on it with Kazuha smirking at her, “Now, do your job, unnie.” she said in a sing-song voice making Minjeong roll her eyes.

 

“What, have someone else to do it.” She didn’t even know why she said that, perhaps it’s because she respected Jimin’s words that night. That she wanted to be alone, and maybe Minjeong was pushing her boundaries too much for the past two weeks. “You saw what happened the last time we talked, Kazuha.”

 

Right before Kazuha could retort, the kitchen door was swung open by Aeri looking from left to right before her eyes connected to Minjeong, glancing down at the tray in front of the latter. “Hey, serve that to Jimin!” She ordered around, her authoritative tone not working on her friend as the latter crossed her arms.

 

“Not you too? You knew what happened, she made it clear that - “

 

“Ning said she’s looking for you,” Aeri cuts her off, entering the kitchen to pull Minjeong out. She nodded to Kazuha to get the tray which the girl immediately followed.

 

“Wha - ,” Minjeong was surprised with Aeri’s strong pull, “What are you even talking about?”

 

Just like that, Minjeong has a tray in her hand with Jimin’s usual order and Aeri looking at her with raised eyebrows. “Jimin’s looking for you, she specifically asked you to serve that to her.”

 

Minjeong looked at Aeri then to the tray, until her eyes landed on the familiar figure of Jimin - sitting quietly in the corner as she played with her fingers. “Whatever, I’ll just serve this to her and go back to the kitchen.”

 

A scoff was heard before Aeri gently pushed Minjeong to the direction of Jimin, “Let’s see about that.”

 

With each step Minjeong takes towards Jimin, she could feel the nervousness bubbling inside her. Like the type of nervousness when she’s going to have the first day on her first job - and it might sound pathetic, but that’s the truth. The soft music playing in the cafe didn’t calm her, it was in fact the opposite. Every fiber and cell in her body seemed to be in chaos, and soon enough she was already standing in front of Jimin’s table.

 

The older girl was facing the window and Minjeong watched her quietly before clearing , realizing it was creepy of her to stare at Jimin like that without the girl knowing. “Hi, so here’s your usual order.” she said quietly, putting down Jimin’s order gently and properly placing the utensils so that the girl wouldn’t have a hard time.

 

Jimin then turned her face to the front, and now she’s facing Minjeong - the songwriter was frozen in her place, she has never seen Jimin’s eyes before but somehow, she feels like the girl would always look straight right into her soul. Shaking her head, she took a step back. “Just call Sakura or Yunjin if you need anything, okay?”

 

But before she could walk away, her ears perked up with how silent Jimin was and yet she clearly heard the question that surprised Minjeong.

 

“Won’t you be sitting with me?”

 

Okay, now that’s new.

 

Minjeong doesn’t know what to say, and heck, she didn’t even say that she was Minjeong - but the way Jimin talked made it seem like the girl knew exactly who she was. Minjeong opens then closes , she couldn’t find the right words to answer.

 

A tilt of head and frown, “Minjeong? I know you’re still there.”

 

“Uh, yeah. I just, they might need my help - “

 

“No, we don’t.”

 

Minjeong looked behind her only to see Yunjin approaching them with a smile, holding a glass of water. “Here, I brought you some water, unnie.” she smiled.

 

“Oh, thanks Yunjin.” Jimin smiled gratefully.

 

The girl then looked at Minjeong, a smirk on her face and just like that, Minjeong heard the seat right next to her scraping the floor, and it’s obvious that Yunjin did it purposely. “Now, I’ll leave Minjeong here with you. Have fun!” She smiled and pushed Minjeong down to sit on the chair and she chuckled as she giddily walked away.

 

Minjeong didn’t have a chance to retort, she could only look at Yunjin's figure and she saw the girl doing a fist bump with Chaewon. The others were obviously watching them as well - the grin on their faces said it all.

 

“Minjeong?”

 

The songwriter jumped on her seat, making the table move a little bit which startled Jimin. “Oh , sorry!” Minjeong quickly apologized, fixing the plate that moved due to her antics.

 

“It’s fine,” Jimin smiled - now, that’s the second time the girl smiled at her in the past two weeks. “I actually want to talk about something.”

 

And that’s when their roles changed - Jimin now started their conversation, while Minjeong could only stare at the girl with wide eyes. She’s not used to the older girl talking to her as if - as if she really wants to talk to her. “Ah, yeah. Sure, what is it about?”

 

She saw Jimin sighing softly, “I’m sorry from that night, Minjeong.”

 

“Oh.”

 

Minjeong blinked, she knew it was coming - it’s not like Jimin was cruel to not apologize to her. But she didn’t expect for the girl to just say it out in the open without any hesitation - and yet, she could hear the sincerity of the older girl. Now, Jimin’s voice has always been soft, that’s a fact that Minjeong knew.

 

But this is a different kind of softness, it’s like the words were sitting right beside Jimin - just waiting for the right time for her to say it out loud. There was no restraint from how Jimin said it, just pure sincerity and softness - and Minjeong couldn’t help but to smile.

 

“It’s fine, Jimin. It’s not a big deal.” She reassured her, and honestly, it wasn’t really a big deal for Minjeong. “It seems like it was not your usual day.”

 

Jimin frowned, then suddenly remembered that Minjeong was there to give her a handkerchief. “Right, it wasn’t.” she answered shortly. Somehow, she expected Minjeong to ask about it - the reason why she cried that day, but they were only enveloped with silence.

 

Maybe this is the reason why Jimin feels free whenever she’s with Minjeong - usually people would ask her questions she’s uncomfortable with. But with Minjeong, she noticed that the latter would just ask her general and surface questions. Heck, Minjeong never asked her how she became blind, the girl didn’t ask her why she cried that day, and then right now.

 

Minjeong just silently sat there, and Jimin could hear the girl’s soft tapping on the table along with the music playing. Suddenly, she had the urge to break the silence - not because she felt awkward with it, but because she missed the way Minjeong’s voice would always sound whenever she says Jimin’s name.

 

“How was the trip?” She decided to ask, and she heard the way Minjeong stopped tapping - and Jimin knew she got the girl’s attention.

 

“The trip?”

 

Jimin nodded her head, “Yeah, Ning said that you went out for three days to make your visit worth it.”

 

“Oh,” Minjeong nodded, now catching up with what Jimin was talking about. “Well, it was fine. Tiring but good.” she answered shortly.

 

Now, this is something that Jimin is not used to - Minjeong’s short answers. But she decided to take the wheel for now, after all it was her fault in the first place. Even if she’s in Minjeong’s shoes, she’d be conscious of everything. “Hmm, yeah? Tell me about it. Where did you go?”

 

Minjeong hesitated a bit, observing Jimin for a moment before starting to share some of her stories. “Uh, I went to Kyoto. Yeah, I mean Aeri basically made an itinerary for me to do. I was too lazy but she forced me to send photos as proof, so I didn’t actually have a choice.”

 

Jimin smiled, “Did she tell you to visit the Arashiyama Bamboo Grove?”

 

Minjeong nodded excitedly, remembering how that place looked. “Yeah, it was way too majestic. I was breathless when I went there!”

 

Jimin smiled as she took a sip from her drink, she could clearly hear the same excitement that Minjeong would have whenever she talked to her before. But other than that, she smiled because she knows what Minjeong is talking about. “Yeah, I might be overreacting but I couldn’t move in my spot the first time I went there. I just wanted to, I don’t know. Let it all in for a moment?” she said, shrugging her shoulders.

 

Minjeong felt elated with how Jimin shared something about her - about her life that Minjeong didn’t even ask. She couldn’t help but to smile at the older girl, leaning backwards as she rested her back against the chair. “I also went to other places, you know, I’ve been here in Japan countless of times and yet Aeri gave me places that I still haven’t visited yet.”

 

“Really? Countless times? For what?”

 

Minjeong hummed, “For work.”

 

Jimin frowned, she knew that Minjeong was probably already working - that much is very evident, but she couldn’t even remember the girl saying what’s her work. And right now, she couldn’t help but to be curious, and unlike Minjeong - Jimin just asked it without hesitation. “What’s your work?”

 

A raised eyebrow and smirk formed on Minjeong’s face - an idea popped in her head. “Curious about me now?” she teased.

 

Jimin chuckles, she realized that she just took Minjeong’s bait but she didn’t care. “Just answer it.”

 

“20 questions,” Minjeong said, and Jimin was confused until Minjeong continued. “Let’s play 20 questions. I assume you’re familiar with it, hm?”

 

Of course Jimin was familiar with it.

 

“Are you a teenager or - “

 

“Will you play or not?”

 

Jimin groaned, “Okay, it’s not like I have a choice.” she grumpily said, taking the last bite from her sandwich. “Let me finish this first.”

 

“Songwriter.” Minjeong answered the girl’s question earlier, making Jimin pause from her drink. “That’s my work, your question earlier.”

 

“Any songs I might know of?”

 

Minjeong chuckled, “Why, curious about me now?”

 

“Nevermind.”

 

“Everything by The Black Skirts.” Minjeong said with a smile.

 

Jimin hummed, she heard the song before and somehow - she couldn’t even imagine that the person in front of her wrote that song. She tried to remember the people that were credited for that song and yet she couldn’t remember Kim Minjeong being written on it.

 

“That’s weird, I only know that WINTER is credited as the writer?”

 

“Nice to meet you, Jimin.”

 

And it was a cute sight to see the realization forming on the girl’s face - the way Jimin’s eyebrows raised and an ‘oh’ forming with . This is the most expression she saw that the older girl did - other than a scowl. 

 

“Now, it's your turn. Let me think of a question.” The songwriter said as she thought of something.

 

Jimn sighed, patiently waiting for Minjeong’s question as she looked for something to do with her fingers - she couldn’t help but to feel nervous with what Minjeong might ask her. So, she couldn’t help but to blurt out something.

 

“What would you even want to know? I’m just Jimin - plain old blind me.” she chuckled quietly, and Jimin bit the inside of her cheeks. She sounded so pathetic - and suddenly remembered her doctor’s appointment earlier that day.

 

“Just continue with the medication, don’t ever lose hope. We know that this is just temporary, okay?”

 

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