Song: 'Breath' by Park Hyo Shin

Heads up, this is a long chapter (compared to the others).
And once again, I'm not a medical expert, so apologies for any medical inaccuracies that might be depicted in this chapter.

*CW: psychosis/dissociation.

---

On a day like today
When old tears that I thought dried up, flow again
My small heart that hasn’t fallen asleep
Breathes

---

Jongdae’s eyelids flew open and he gasped as life surged back into his body. 

Almost immediately he squeezed his eyes shut because the lights were too bright.

“J-Jongdae?  Jongdae-Hyung?  Oh my God- Eomma!  Appa!  Guys – he’s waking up!” cried out someone.

He heard footsteps scuffling around him.  He blinked until his eyes adjusted to the light to find faces gathered around him and looking down at him, faces filled with a mixture of shock and relief, some of whom were tear-stricken.

Jongdae’s eyes widened as he recognised the faces – they were the same ones he’d seen back in the swamp – these were the people who were important to him.

He tried to sit up then yelped when a jarring pain lanced through the entire left side of his body.

Somebody was then holding him and trying to ease him back down into a lying position.

“Jongdae-ssi, you’ve suffered a traumatic accident, and you have multiple injuries, so right now you should remain lying down.” spoke a voice he didn’t recognise.

He turned to the owner of a voice to find a man with dimples who was dressed in a white coat.

“My name is Dr Zhang Yixing.  I’m your trauma surgeon.” the man continued.  “But you may call me Dr Zhang.  By any chance, do you remember the accident?”

Jongdae could only shake his head slowly.

“You were driving along an intersection when a van collided with your vehicle, knocking you unconscious.  You suffered a concussion, along with a minor fracture to your skull.  You also have fractures along your arm, ribs, hip and leg…”

The rest of Dr Zhang’s words faded into white noise and Jongdae looked around him to register his current state.  Through his brain fog, he could see that he was indeed lying in a bed inside a hospital ward, and there was a cast around his arm.  He could also feel something hard like plaster around his leg and hip, but they were covered by a blanket.  There was also an IV drip stuck in his unbroken arm.

He looked back to the people gathered around him.  They all looked very familiar, and although Jongdae still couldn’t pinpoint who they were or where he’d seen them before, he knew that he knew these people.  The ones most familiar to him were the middle-aged couple and the boy who’d called out for them to come over when he woke up.

And then he suddenly remembered where he’d seen the couple before.

“You two kind of look like my parents,” he said.

“Jongdae-ah, we are your parents.” replied the woman, who appeared slightly confused by his response but still held a sliver of hope in her eyes.

So that explained it.  “Hmm… that must be why.” he hummed, not knowing how else to respond.

“Mrs Kim, your son is currently experiencing what is known as PTA, which stands for post-traumatic amnesia.” explained Dr Zhang.  “It’s a common symptom in patients who have woken up from a coma.  Since Jongdae’s head injury was mild to moderate, it should only take around a few days, or a week at most, for him to regain his normal memory capability.”

“Ah, I understand, Dr Zhang.” replied the woman who was apparently Jongdae’s mother.

Wait – he was in a coma?

He turned back to Dr Zhang.  “Um… how long was I out for?”

“You were out for five days.”

Jongdae gaped and his eyebrows shot up.  Five days?  The time he’d spent inside that realm during his coma only felt like a few hours!

“Hyung, do you remember me?” spoke the boy who Jongdae had heard first after waking up.  “It’s Jongin, your brother.”

Jongdae could indeed see how Jongin resembled his father in some aspects, including the defined jawline, full lips and tan complexion. It made him wonder if he himself resembled his mother, who had lighter skin, high cheekbones and upturned curves in the corners of . Maybe, once he finally got out of bed, he should look in the mirror.

Jongdae couldn't help but think of how the boy looked so adorable and huggable, almost like a…

“You look like a teddy bear!” he remarked, smiling.  Jongin blinked and deadpanned back at him.

“Jongdae, do you remember us?” someone else asked.  It was a man who looked around Jongdae’s age, and he had round cheeks and a hopeful smile that looked somewhat boxy.  When Jongdae looked more closely, he could spot tiny moles dotted across the man’s nose and chin.  Next to him stood a ridiculously tall man with big eyes, dimpled cheeks, and ears that stuck out like those of an elf.  Jongdae thought he reminded him of a character he’d read in a book when he was little.  They both looked more like boys than men, and they seemed like very fun people to be around, in his opinion.

“It’s your best friend Baekhyun, and this is Chanyeol.” said the man, gesturing next to him.

“Hi Baekhyun, my name’s Jongdae!” he waved while grinning stupidly, holding out his unbroken hand for Baekhyun to shake.

The two men exchanged questioning glances, before the tall guy named Chanyeol spoke.  “Uh, Jongdae, we already know that.”

Jongdae turned towards Chanyeol.  “You have really big eyes.” he observed.  “And big ears.  And you’re also really tall!”  Then smirking, he added: “I wonder what else is big.”

Chanyeol’s face, ears and all, flushed beet red.  Baekhyun, however, was almost glaring at Jongdae.

“Jongdae… he’s my husband.” Baekhyun said, as though this was an obvious fact.

“Wait – really?” Jongdae blurted out.  “Wow, you really hit the jackpot with this cutie!”

“Hyuung!” scolded Jongin in a whiny tone.  “You’re literally hitting on your friend’s husband right in front of our parents!”

“Ahahah, please pardon Jongdae.” chuckled Dr Zhang.  “It’s not uncommon for patients who’ve just woken up from a coma to exhibit unusual behaviours.  Over the next few days, you may also witness Jongdae having episodes of psychosis.  But don’t worry, these symptoms are all temporary, and he should be back to his normal self within a week.  Just bear with him, please.” he gave them a reassuring dimpled smile.

Mr Kim sighed and nodded.  “We understand, Dr Zhang.” he replied.

Then Jongdae remembered which book character Chanyeol reminded him of.

“Hey Chanyeol, have you heard of the BFG, or the Big Friendly Giant?” he asked, and then pointed at him.  “You look just like him!” he remarked, then burst into a fit of giggles.

Baekhyun and Chanyeol looked at each other again, before they too, burst out laughing. Jongin shrugged, shook his head and snorted while trying to stifle his laughter. Jongdae’s parents exchanged glances before they also began chuckling. Even Dr Zhang struggled to contain his giggles.

As Jongdae laughed with them, even with his injuries, he couldn’t remember the last time he had ever felt this light.

✨🕊✨

The next several days after Jongdae had woken up were a fever dream.  All he could remember were endless dreams and visions of being back in the realm he’d visited during his coma.  He saw blue butterflies fluttering above him, over his bed.  Sometimes he was back in the field, playing with the children, and Winter had made him a flower crown to put on his head (he found out later that it was actually a nurse named Soojung who’d come to check his vitals).  Sometimes he was in the sky, floating through the fluffy pink clouds while watching birds pass by him, as the world went on below.  Sometimes he was back in the forest clearing, dancing with the other inhabitants of the realm, along with Minseok, Suho and Irene.  Sometimes he would bathe in the shimmering lake while watching the pink clouds pass by above him in the lilac sky. At night he would dream of lying in Minseok’s arms in the field, surrounded by flowers as they gazed lovingly into each others’ eyes.

The days passed and recollections of his accident after work, along with memories of his friends and family, came back to him one by one.  He finally remembered how the crash had happened: he’d had a hallucination of Minseok on that intersection which led him to miss the red light, so he’d driven onto the path of an incoming van.  He gradually learnt to recognise his friends and family, and felt an overwhelming sense of relief to see them.

What irritated him the most, though, was that he had more energy than he’d ever had in ages – and yet he was bound by his injuries, the plaster.  The pain from his injuries were only bearable because of the pain relief medication they gave him.  He wanted to do so much – he wanted to walk, run, dance, jump and skip, yet he couldn’t.  He yearned for the day he would finally be free from his bed-bound state. 

When he was finally completely lucid, Dr Zhang had approached him to ask him something.  He wore a grave expression on his face.

“Jongdae,” he said.  “During your psychosis, you kept on mentioning various people’s names.” then he swallowed and continued: “One of those names was Ningning.  Could you please tell me where you heard that name before?”

“During my coma, I was in this place, I think it was the afterlife, and I met a few people there.” explained Jongdae.  “One of them was my late husband Minseok, who passed away a few months ago.  I also met a few children, and one of them was called Ningning.  Why, do you know her?”

Dr Zhang took a deep quivering breath, before he answered.

“That was the nickname I called my daughter, Yizhuo.”

Jongdae’s eyes widened and his lips parted in shock.

“She… was my whole world.” Dr Zhang went on.  He wore a sad, nostalgic smile and his eyes shone.  “She drowned while we were on a family vacation in Jeju Island.  It absolutely broke my wife and I; I felt like I’d failed as a parent.  I always thought she would be the one to watch me die, never the other way around – especially not when she was as young and precious as she was.”

“I… I’m so sorry for your loss.” was all Jongdae could say.

Then, after thinking about his coma, he went on: “When I lost my husband in a road accident, I also felt like I’d failed him, because I was driving and we’d always sworn to protect each other.  But when I met him during my coma, he told me that it could have happened to anyone, and that he didn’t want to see me suffer because of what had happened.  He forgave me and told me to keep living my life without regretting anything.” he turned to look back at Dr Zhang.  “You know, your daughter told me that she still loves you, and that she hopes you’re not sad.  I don’t think your daughter would want you to blame yourself for what happened, Dr Zhang.  That was also a common accident that could have happened to anyone.  Unfortunately, it was her.  If there’s anything the past few months have taught me, it’s that in life, we never really know what’s gonna happen.”

A tear rolled down Dr Zhang’s cheek.  “Thank you.” he whispered, then added: “By the way, how is she?”

“She’s happy and surrounded by people who love and care for her.” comforted Jongdae, and he held out his unbroken hand to Dr Zhang, who clasped it in his own.

“Thank you for letting me know.” he sighed.  “I truly appreciate it.”

He then continued: “You know, she is the reason why I do what I do.  Everyday when I get up and go to work, I do it for her.  Sometimes when I have patients who are children, I feel like I see her in them.”

“She would be so proud of you.” said Jongdae.  “Thank you for everything you’ve done for me, Dr Zhang.”

Dr Zhang beamed a bright dimpled smile at him.  “You may call me Dr Yixing.”

🕊✨🕊

“Do you have any idea how worried we were about you?” asked Jongin.  “We didn’t know when you would wake up.”

“We watched you while you were in your coma.” added Jongdae’s mother.  “Sometimes it looked like you were having dreams.  At one point, you were crying in your sleep.”

Jongdae recalled his reunion with Minseok back in the realm, and how he’d wept his heart out in Minseok’s arms.  He told his brother and parents all about the realm he’d visited during his coma; the swamp, the field, the children, Suho and Irene, and meeting Minseok again.  They all listened attentively.

“Jongdae, there’s something you should know.” spoke his father.  “We don’t want to guilt you or anything, but when we lost Minseok, we felt like we were losing you, too.  You just weren’t the same person as you were before he died.  You were slipping away from us … and when the hospital called us about the car crash last week, we were terrified that you’d be gone forever.”

Jongdae’s heart sank to hear his father’s words.  “I’m so sorry for what I put you and Eomma through.”

“Don’t be, it’s not your fault.” replied his mother.  “We understand what you were going through.  We know how much he meant to you.”

Being friends since childhood, Jongdae’s and Minseok’s families had also grown close together as they grew up, and when they got married, Minseok had been welcomed into Jongdae’s family with open arms.  Jongdae could understand just how much they would have also been affected by Minseok’s death. 

“You know, Hyung,” said Jongin.  “After you woke up and started laughing, even though you were slightly out of it, that was the first time any of us had seen you smile or laugh since Minseok died.  We really missed that, and we really missed you too.”

“Well, Nini-Bear,” said Jongdae, calling his younger brother by his childhood nickname, “I’m just letting you know that I am very much back, and I can guarantee you all that I’m not leaving anytime soon.”  He smiled reassuringly while pulling Jongin close to him.

“You promise you’ll stay out of trouble?” quipped their father lightheartedly.

“I promise, Appa.”

“And I don’t think you should drive for a while, not even after you’ve healed from your injuries.” said their mother. 

“Don’t worry Eomma, I don’t intend on getting back behind the wheel anytime soon, not when I’ve done my whole left side in.”

“Really Hyung, it’s great to have you back.” said Jongin, who snuggled closer to him.

Jongdae chuckled and patted Jongin’s back.  “It’s great to be back.”

✨🕊✨

One day, Jongdae received an unexpected group of visitors: his former in-laws.

His breath caught in his throat when he saw Minseok’s parents and sister Yerim walk into his room. 

“Jongdae,” greeted Jongwoon, Minseok’s father, who smiled softly.  “What a relief it is to finally see you again.”

“Pleasure to see you too, Jongwoon-ssi.” Jongdae replied, bowing his head to the best of his abilities.  He also greeted Minseok’s mother Soonkyu, and Yerim.

“Please; you can still call us ‘Eomeonim’ and ‘Abeonim’ like you used to.” waved off Jongwoon.

“We wanted to come and support you. When we heard about your accident, we came here as soon as possible.” said Soonkyu.  “I can only imagine how hard the past few months must have been for you; it’s been so hard for all of us too, and we know Minseok would have wanted to be here sitting beside you right now – which is why we also came on his behalf.”

Jongdae was lost for words.  He never expected Minseok’s parents would still be so kind to him – not after what he’d done to their son. 

And that was when he remembered the request Minseok had made to him.

“When you go back,” said Minseok, “tell my family that I love them and that I am grateful for everything they’ve done for me.  Let them know that I am happy and at ease, and I hope they are looking after each other.  Can you do that for me, please?”

Jongdae had to pass on Minseok’s message.  After all, he really owed it to them.

So he opened up to them about how he’d seen Minseok during his coma, and the message Minseok had for his family.  When he was done, his former in-laws were all in tears.

“Do you have any idea how much it means to me to hear that?” sobbed Soonkyu.  “Just knowing that he is truly resting peacefully… I feel like I can finally breathe again.  Thank you so much for telling us.” Jongwoon and Yerim nodded in agreement.

“You’re welcome; I’m glad to hear that, Eomeonim.” replied Jongdae.

“You know Jongdae-Oppa,” spoke Yerim as she wiped away tears, “After Minseok-Oppa’s funeral, we tried to reach out to you but you never wanted to talk to us.”  She sniffled.  “We called you and I even came to your house but you wouldn’t open the door.  You were family to us too, you know, and you still are.  It really hurt when you shut us out like that; we felt like you didn’t care, that we didn’t matter to you.”

Jongdae felt tears prick in his eyes.  Of course, he had also been close to Minseok’s family since they were children, and hearing Yerim make this revelation made him feel guilty for an entirely different reason.  They also needed him while they were suffering, and he wasn’t there for them.

“I’m truly sorry I ever made you feel that way, Yerim; of course I care about you.” he apologised.  Then he turned back to Minseok’s parents.  “I’m also truly sorry to both of you.  I – I just felt so ashamed, knowing that you trusted me to look after your son; I felt like I had betrayed your trust.  I didn’t think you’d even want to look at me, let alone forgive me – I couldn’t even forgive myself back then.”

“Jongdae, we never held anything against you for what happened to Minseok.” spoke Jongwoon.  “We know just how much you loved him, and I can only imagine what you must have felt, since you were the driver.  If I had ever let any harm come towards my son, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself either.  That’s exactly why we wanted to be there for you… if only you had let us.”

“Thank you, Abeonim,” whimpered Jongdae as tears of relief spilled from his eyes.  “But at least you’re here for me now, and that’s more than enough.”

“Yes, we are.” replied Jongwoon.  “Besides, you were the best husband – the best friend we could have ever asked for our son.  You really brought out the best in him, you always stood up for him ever since he was a child, and you always filled him with happiness.  You’re one of the reasons he grew up to be the great man he was.  You meant everything to him.  We are truly grateful for all that you’ve done for Minseok, and we always will be.”

Jongdae sobbed in relief.  They really didn’t hate him after all.

“Thank you all so much for being here.” he sniffled.  “Really, I mean it.  It means so much to me.”

“If you ever need anything, we’re always here.” said Soonkyu.

“Thank you so much, Eomeonim.” replied Jongdae.  “You can also let me know if you need anything.”

🕊✨🕊

In the weeks that followed during his hospital stay, Baekhyun and Chanyeol also visited him.  As he spent time with them, he realised just what he’d been missing out on while grieving for his late husband.  He realised how much he had missed their laughter and their jokes, their long heated conversations that spanned from the most trivial topics to the most meaningful ones – and really, he just missed having them by his side.

“We were really worried about you, you know.” said Baekhyun.  “When we heard about what happened to you, it was like losing Minseok all over again – we didn’t think we could handle losing another one of our best friends.  You really need to be careful!”

“Sorry I made you worry, guys.  And don’t worry, I swear I’ll be more careful next time.” replied Jongdae. 

Then he remembered the last argument they’d had at his place, which made him feel even more guilty.

“Just letting you know,” he added, “about the last time you guys came to my house, I’m sorry for lashing out at you.  I actually really needed you guys back then, but instead I pushed you away.”

“No hard feelings, Jongdae.” replied Chanyeol, shaking his head and waving his hand dismissively.  Baekhyun did the same in agreement.  Then Chanyeol changed the subject.

“After you woke up though, and in the few days after that – now that was a whole different story.” he spoke, a -eating grin spreading across his face.  “You should have heard yourself, you were spewing the craziest – it was like you had no filter!”

“Ah whyyy,” whined Jongdae.  “What did I say?”

“You looked like you were having an acid trip.” giggled Baekhyun.  “You were literally singing about flying, and you kept calling us random names of people we’ve never met – apparently I was ‘Mark’ and Chanyeol was ‘Winwin’. Then when your family came in, you called your Dad ‘Suho’ while your mother was ‘Irene’. Then you thought that Dr Zhang was Minseok!”

“Oh my God,” groaned Jongdae, who buried his burning face into his pillow while being careful not to hurt his injuries.  “That’s just ing embarassing…”

“It was awkward, for sure, but still funny.” chuckled Chanyeol.  “I’ve got it on video!”

“Yah!  You better delete that or else as soon as I stand up, I’ll whoop your !" snapped Jongdae, punching Chanyeol in the arm (with his good arm, of course).

And just like that, it felt like things between them were back to the way they used to be, even without Minseok there.

✨🕊✨

Healing from his injuries was no easy journey, but luckily Jongdae wasn’t alone.  Hygiene was a huge battle, since tasks like going to the toilet, washing his hands and bathing were nearly impossible in his handicapped state.  He was so incredibly grateful for the nurses that had come to his aid when he needed them.  Dealing with the pain and swelling around his broken bones was arduous, and getting his casts replaced was a painstaking process.  He honestly didn’t know how he would have gotten through the seven weeks in hospital without his family, friends or medical personnel at his side.

The journey after he was discharged from the hospital looked much brighter though.  He no longer needed a wheelchair as his only mode of mobility, and he could stand and walk (very carefully) with the help of a walking stick.  He still had another seven weeks of physiotherapy ahead of him, but it couldn’t have been much harder than the seven weeks before. 

Before Jongdae was discharged, he made sure to thank all the nurses involved in his recovery, especially Dr Yixing, who had operated on his broken hip to hold it together while he was comatose.  Dr Yixing told him he was welcome to come back at any time to have the bolt in his hip removed if it ever caused problems for him in the future.

Minseok’s family offered to pay for all of Jongdae’s medical bills, including his physiotherapy.  Jongdae was so overwhelmed by their generosity, at first he’d declined it, but they insisted; “Minseok would want you to accept it.” Soonkyu said.  Jongdae thought Minseok indeed would have been insulted if he turned down a gift from his family, so he gave in and accepted their offer.  Jongdae didn’t know how he would ever repay their altruism.  His own family were also so thankful for the other Kims’ kindness.

Okay, so maybe physio was slightly harder than Jongdae expected.  But he was very glad to have more mobility than he did before, and gradually got more of it back with the exercises he did, even though they were painful at times.  Sehun, his physiotherapist, was patient with him and told him to keep up the good progress he was making, even during times when it felt like he’d gone back to square one.  It was hard, for sure, but worth it. 

Jongdae moved back into his parents’ place temporarily to help with his recovery.  While he stayed there, Jongin told him that there was a cute guy named Kyungsoo he’d met during dance class, and he wanted to ask him out.  Jongdae was happy to hear his brother had found someone he liked, but considering Jongin’s ex had been a total dickwad, he was wary for him and didn’t want him to get hurt again.  A week later, Kyungsoo came to their door to pick up Jongin for a date, and Jongdae had been there to send them off.  Kyungsoo did seem like a decent person; nevertheless Jongdae told Kyungsoo to take good care of his brother, or else he’d kick his , to which Jongin groaned, “Hyung, I’m a grown- man, I can take care of myself.”  Kyungsoo had chuckled and said, “I understand, Jongdae-ssi,” before he assured Jongdae that he would take care of him.

Jongdae also went out to have drinks with Baekhyun and Chanyeol for the first time in several months.  He got to catch up with what they’d been up to lately: Chanyeol had been chosen to help design a sleek new performing arts facility that would open in the middle of Seoul’s entertainment precinct.  Baekhyun had just had a massive court case victory where a reputable insurance company had been fraudulently charging his client millions of won for services they never even asked for.  Jongdae was proud to see his two friends succeeding in both their professional and personal lives, and that they were still going strong as a couple.  He had really missed being able to hang out like this with his friends.  As they talked and joked and laughed and were being their drunk crackhead selves just like they used to, he felt truly at ease for the first time in a long time.

Soon it would be Jongdae’s birthday, and although it would be his first birthday without Minseok since his childhood, he still wanted to celebrate it with his friends and family.  He made sure to invite Minseok’s family as a way of thanking them for paying off his medical bills.  He also invited Baekhyun and Chanyeol, and even invited Jongin’s new boyfriend Kyungsoo to get to know him better.  He had spent so long being alone, and on his birthday he just wanted to be surrounded by people close to him.

On the morning of his birthday, Jongdae woke up to receive hugs from all of his family members, and had a hearty breakfast of eggs, rice and pork cutlet.  His mother gifted him a hanbok that used to belong to his late grandfather, along with a scarf that she had knitted.  The next few months would start getting chillier, which was why his father gave him a new grey woollen coat, along with matching gloves.  Jongin gifted him a wooden chess set, which really touched Jongdae as he then remembered how much he loved the game, but hadn’t played it since Minseok died.  He would be sure to get back into the game with his brother, who had also sometimes played chess with him during their childhood. 

He tried on his hanbok, which was met with ‘wow’s by his family.  His mother told him he looked just like her father did when he was about his age, to which Jongdae joked, “I guess I am becoming more like my grandfather; I’ve got a bolt in my hip and I still need a cane!”  While his father and Jongin laughed, his mother scolded him: “Yah, Jongdae-ah – this is a family heirloom, don’t you make fun of your grandfather like that!”  They took photos of him wearing his hanbok.  He also got to try on his coat and his gloves, which were comfortable and warm.

Then they had a light lunch because they wanted to have plenty of space left in their stomachs for the dinner party.  Until the guests arrived, Jongdae spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing by reading a book, and then playing chess with his brother, which he hadn’t done in a long time.  Meanwhile, his parents set up the table and the food for the dinner party. 

When the guests finally arrived, Jongdae was showered in so many gifts: flowers, wine, coffee and tea sets, picture frames, shoes, mugs, potted plants, jewellery, and so much more.  But honestly, Jongdae didn’t mind the gifts; he was really just happy to have them over.  They spent an hour chatting, eating finger food and catching up with each other, while Jongin introduced Kyungsoo to all the guests, until Jongdae’s mother finally called everyone for dinner.

The food, which Jongdae had helped his mother prepare the day before, was absolutely delicious, and it made Jongdae realise just how much he’d missed his mother’s cooking, having spent most of his adulthood living away from his parents.  He ate more than he’d ever eaten in ages.  Glasses of wine were poured and clinked, appetites were being filled, the table was bubbling with conversation and the air was filled with warmth and contentment. 

Then his mother, who Jongdae didn’t know had disappeared, came into the dining room, bringing the cake that was lit up in candles, and she called out “Happy Birthday, Jongdae-ah!” to him.  Everyone began singing ‘Happy Birthday’ as his mother brought the cake around the table towards him.  Once they’d finished singing and the cake was in front of him, his father asked him to make a wish. 

While Jongdae thought of his wish, he stared at the faces of all the people gathered around him, and saw the warmth and genuine love their gazes held.

Their gazes, along with all the support and generosity they had shown him – felt just like the unconditional love and forgiveness he had experienced back in the realm – that he had received from Suho, Irene, the children; and most of all, his husband. 

It had been the toughest journey of his life to find the part of himself that he had lost along with Minseok, and now he finally felt whole again.

Minseok’s death had left nothing but darkness in its wake, but now a light was finally shining in Jongdae’s life – brighter than the candles that were lit up in front of him. 

For the past several weeks, his friends and family had stuck by his side, and he wouldn’t have been able to carry on without their staunch support and motivation.  But there was one person who had also been there for him all along, and if it weren’t for him, Jongdae knew he wouldn’t be here.

Minseok.  His angel.

Minseok had saved him. 

In the candlelight, the ring on Jongdae’s finger gleamed softly.  Even after his passing, Minseok still kept his promise to Jongdae to always protect him.  Minseok’s love didn’t die with him, it only grew and gave Jongdae the strength he needed to go on, filling him with vitality. 

In that moment, Jongdae could feel Minseok’s spirit singing loud and clear in his heart, keeping it beating and alive.

For the first time in what felt like an eternity, the tears that were rolling down his face were not of grief, but of joy. This was the happiest he had ever felt. To finally feel at ease, and to have Minseok’s love, along with that of everyone gathered around him – this moment alone was the best gift he could have ever possibly asked for.

His mother asked him why he was crying.  “I just feel so incredibly blessed.” he replied, smiling widely while wiping away his tears, and his brother wrapped an arm around his shoulders, rubbing his arm and back soothingly.

When he was in the realm above, Jongdae felt like he had everything. Now, he looked around him and saw that he already had everything he needed down here.  He knew exactly what to wish for: he just wanted things to stay as they were now, with him being happy while surrounded by the love of his friends and family.  He blew out the candles as everyone cheered for him.

After they served the cake, Jongdae had an important announcement to make, so he tapped his glass with his spoon to get everyone’s attention.  They all turned to look at him.

“First of all,” he began, “I just want to thank everyone for coming here today, and for all the support you have shown me. The amount of kindness and generosity I’ve received over the past several weeks has just been overwhelming – and it’s not only now. I really want to thank everyone here for always being there for me whenever I need it, from the bottom of my heart. I can’t even describe just how much it means to me; I will forever be grateful to you all.

“I also want to thank someone who unfortunately isn’t with us today, but I’m sure he would have loved to be here, and that is my husband, Minseok.” he went on.  “He always had a positive fighting spirit, and a bright outlook on life, which inspired me to keep going on with my life.  He will forever be in my heart – in all of our hearts.  I know he’s up there somewhere looking down on us, and tonight, I want to make a toast to him.”  He held up his glass and smiled.  “To Minseok.”

“To Minseok!” everyone else followed, and they all clinked their glasses. 

Minseok never lied, he was still with Jongdae. 

There was nothing left to fear. 

🕊✨🕊
 

---

Chanyeol is a real-life BFG and you can't tell me otherwise 😤

We're almost at the end, but good on you if you managed to get this far, you deserve lots of hugs and pats on the back. Jongdae really deserves this ending, after all I put him through (sorry Jongdae 😅😅)