... 12.24.2017

Maybe it was the holiday spirit. Maybe it was the adrenaline that rushed through her veins at the mere thought of seeing him again, but Jiyeon was in a festive mood.

Jiyeon found herself once again rolling her suitcase through Incheon airport. Patiently descending down the escalators, the familiar electronic board titled international departures faintly in her vision. It was going to be their first meeting in almost 3 months. Daniel was thriving in the NBA, and his family had secretly set up a surprise meeting between the two of them.

This was also Jiyeon’s first time meeting them in person. If she was being honest, she was absolutely terrified. After New York, and some private tutoring she felt slightly more confident in her English. But at the same time, she had no idea what to expect this time. 

Christmas with Daniel with his family. It still felt like an out of reach fantasy. 

He would fly in from his game tonight expecting to spend Christmas and New Years with his family, meanwhile Jiyeon would be waiting to surprise him. 

Jiyeon had already discretely disabled his tracking abilities several days ago, hoping it wouldn’t be too suspicious. Thankfully, he had said nothing. She knew he was busy, and often exhausted with his taxing schedules. He was finally doing what he loved, and he was succeeding on his second try. 

With just one google search, she could read article after article praising his performances. Not that she understood each article, especially the ones by ESBN or whatever it was called. But most of the time, it was the easiest way to see how he was doing.

You see, Daniel never talked about basketball during their long phone calls. Instead he would ask about her day, talk about food he was learning to cook in his free time, discuss dramas they could watch together. She knew he was intentionally trying to cater towards her interest, but it wasn’t like she wasn’t interested in sports either. 

Still, she never complained, nor questioned him. Electing to go along with whatever conversation he brought during their long phone calls. 

That’s why Jiyeon spent the plane ride reading American articles, there was a lot about him. But she also found herself searching for an article about her. T-ara was expected to disband this January with their contracts drawing to a close.

She had already met with several agencies, and none really appealed to her. At first, she had believed she would simply follow Hyomin unnie, but no agency seemed to be interested in packaging the two together. So, she felt clueless in her decision making.

However, she knew that as the contract expired, she would soon be forced to make a decision. One that would affect not only her, but also her loved one. 

After a few hours and she saw that he had texted her. 

    DAEHAN: My game is tonight, then I’m going to fly and spend Christmas with my family

    JIYEON: really? 

Jiyeon was glad she didn’t have to lie to his face. She had done enough of that, now she didn’t feel like she would be able to maintain a straight face in front of him. 

    DAEHAN: mhm… I wish I could be with you

    DAEHAN: I really wanted to spend Christmas together with you again

    JIYEON: me too

    JIYEON: it’s ok, we’ll have time later

She wasn’t really lying, more just vaguely responding. 

    DAEHAN: I know. I miss you like crazy.

    DAEHAN: You know that right?

    JIYEON: I know

Jiyeon smirked foolishly as she self consciously glanced around at the neighboring passengers. Thankfully, none seemed to be staring in her direction. 

    JIYEON: I love you 

    DAEHAN: me too

Jiyeon sighed as she finally put down her phone. Texting him was starting to become harder and harder. She longed to be in his warm embrace, and stare up at his handsome face admiring him at night. Soon. Soon.

    JENNY: Hi, I just wanted to make sure you got on the plane ok?

    JIYEON: I did, tell your parents thank you for the tickets

    JENNY: Of course, they’re both just excited to meet you

    JENNY: Especially my mom

    JENNY: I’ve never seen her so excited, she spent the entire day ordering my dad to clean up around the house

    JIYEON: I can’t wait to meet them too

    JENNY: I’ll pick you up from the airport, so just text me when you arrive. 

…

Jiyeon cheerfully rolled her suitcase out of the large terminal, after quite swiftly being processed through customs. She was starting to boast herself quite an expert after her summer visit. 

Jiyeon gasped as she soon as her face met the warm California air. She stared in wonder at just how tall the palm trees were and blue cloudless sky. As anticipated it was significantly warmer here than in Seoul. However, she wasn’t expecting it to the extend that she found herself removing her padded coat. 

“You won’t be needing that here.” It was a female voice, oddly familiar, especially after watching her video with Daniel and talking over the phone with her. 

Jiyeon found herself face to face with a girl that looked somewhat-like Daniel. And not in a negative way at all, she was pretty, with mid-length black hair and blond highlights tied into a high ponytail. Though definitely much shorter than Jiyeon was expecting, only about 5’4. Considering Jiyeon had figured that the Choi’s family genes would make even the females stand like dinosaurs. 

“I know, I’m shorter than most expect.” Jenny commented in English as if reading her mind. They were a lot alike in that aspect, the way their eyes narrowed on you, and a hint of hidden intelligence seemed to reveal itself past an aloof exterior. 

Unlike Jiyeon, she was definitely dressed for the weather. Dressed in a cropped t-shirt with a light flannel overtop, and a long pair of ripped jeans. It was very fitting for the more autumn like temperature, unlike any December Jiyeon had experienced.

Jiyeon smiled, remembering the English she had been studying for the past few months. “Hi Jenny. It’s nice to see—”

She didn’t even get to finish, when Jenny rushed forward and jumped arms forward in excitement. “OH My GOD! I’m so glad to finally meet you.”

Jiyeon nodded slowly as she reciprocated the embrace. It felt sort of strange how she had never met his sister in person before, despite their long dating history. 

“Thank you.” She found herself mumbling in Korean. 

“Let’s go, I’m parked outside.” Jenny beckoned for her to follow as she left with a hop in her step, Jiyeon’s suitcase in her hand. 

Jiyeon grinned watching with amusement. They could be different at the same time. But considering her relationship with her bother, it wasn’t that surprising. 

Her purse tucked against her chest, she followed the bright girl towards the entrance. She could see the sun pouring through the glass airport, as hundreds of people passed her by. Just like in New York, it was slightly strange, not a feeling that she was used to. There wasn’t a hoard of paparazzi waiting at every corner, like there were in Korea. It was just ordinary people going on with their daily lives. 

She exited through the sliding glass doors towards the temporary parking and saw Jenny point her keys towards a sleek white Porsche. She was certainly different than Daniel in that aspect. Despite his wealth, Daniel only purchased things out of utility. He bought one white Tesla, he lived in his same old apartment, he never dressed flashily even if his clothes were brand name.  

Jenny didn’t seem to mind flaunting her family’s wealth. 

“Are you coming?” Jiyeon realized she had been caught staring, and quickly followed her into the car. 

The way back from the airport she spent most of the time staring out of the windows in awe. It was almost insane, it really looked just like from the movies. 

They traveled along a highway that winded around the coasts, the picturesque view of the pacific ocean on one side, and expensive beach side condos on the other. 

Sure, it wasn’t the tall palm trees that lined what she figured would’ve been Hollywood. Or the artistic buildings and walls that were spray painted with graphic art. But, she figured she could see that later. 

“Are you hungry?” 

Jiyeon nodded her head, but her eyes were glued to the beautiful blue pacific water. It was surprisingly calm. She could even spot some small groups of people gathered along the beach, a sight she never could’ve imagined during the winter. 

“Daniel oppa might get upset that I took you here without him, but there’s this delicious burger restaurant that we always take Koreans too.” Jenny revealed. 

Jiyeon glanced back and smirked. “Sounds good then.”

“Do you like the view?” 

“Yes, it’s very pretty.” She answered in English, it was just like her dream. Though she decided to keep her reputation intact, she wouldn’t share about having a dream visiting here after his death.

However, she didn’t realize the reason Jenny asked until seconds later. With the press of a button, the overhead roof of the expensive convertible began to lower. Without any prior warning, Jiyeon’s hair flew backwards into her face as she registered why Jenny wore her hair into a ponytail.

Thankfully, Jenny pulled off the highway a few minutes, later and slowed down to a more coasting speed. “Sorry,” his sister giggled as Jiyeon fixed her messy hair in the side mirror.

“It’s fine, I needed the air.” Jiyeon realized afterwards, her witty joke was in Korean.

Jenny seemed to understand, and Jiyeon recalled that Daniel had told her, Jenny had been the one to embrace Kpop first. 

They pulled into the parking lot of a quite retro looking restaurant. A bright yellow arrow above, with red text on a white building. Yet, Jiyeon couldn’t say it looked anything like a McDonald’s either. 

There were several other cars parked there, which led her to believe it was quite popular, and she had heard it was a chain. 

As they left the car behind them, she could make out the English lettering better. 

“In— Nen — Owt.” She did her best to pronounce the words, and Jenny giggled immediately. 

“In and out.” 

Jiyeon nodded, she vaguely remembered Daniel mentioned the restaurant, but couldn’t remember the exact details. 

The restaurant’s interior was as tacky as its exterior. Checkered tile flooring, white tables and bright red booths. It had a look similar to the diners in old American movies. Or at least, that was what she assumed. She had never actually seen many ‘old American movies’. 

“Would you like your burger with cheese or not?” Jenny asked, as she tried to explain the menu to Jiyeon.

It was a simple menu, with surprisingly almost no choices. But, everyone inside seemed to be content with their meals. 

When they finished ordering, Jiyeon followed Jenny to one of the few empty tables, and noticed it hadn’t yet dried from being hastily wiped down. There was even still a ketchup stain on the edge. 

Noticing it, Jenny quickly returned with some napkins and wiped it down. 

“Oh my gosh, so sorry.”

“It’s ok.” Jiyeon tried to clarify, not wanting to feel judgmental or self indulgent. She really was interested in this rather strange restaurant. 

After about 10 minutes, their number was called and Jenny brought back the food on a— and you guessed it. Bright red tray. 

Jiyeon was immediately startled to see only one actual burger there. The other was what seemed to be a patty wrapped between two large pieces of Lettuce. She had certainly noticed that on the menu.

“This is called protein style.” Jenny revealed. “This restaurant is famous for what’s called their ‘bimil menu’, they have many choices and combinations.”

Jiyeon nodded as she noticed that one of the fries also had a strange combination of mushrooms and sauce on top of it. “Looks good,” she remarked.

Even if she took the first bite, out of politeness, and not expecting much. The second and third bites followed quite promptly. It was strangely addicting, despite the rather thin patty. The bread was clearly toasted, and there was a delicious tangy sauce inside. 

“It’s good.” Jiyeon remarked, finally staring up towards Jenny. 

Jenny hadn’t taken a single bite, instead her eyes were glued towards her, and had large smirk on her lips. 

“Wow, you really are a good eater.”

Jiyeon glanced back down, and noticed in her 3 bites, almost half of the sandwich had disappeared. 

“It’s really really good.” Jiyeon couldn’t find words in English to describe her delight.

“I’m relieved to hear, I was worried you might not like it.” 

The final stretch to the house felt short. Jiyeon, feeling slightly fatigued after the flight, almost fell asleep as they cruised along the mostly empty streets. However, her eyes flickered open, as Jenny rolled to a stop at a gated entrance. Jenny clicked a button on her car, and the steel barred gates began electronically swinging open.

As soon as they rolled through the entrance, it all felt so surreal. The tan and brown roofed houses that looked to be almost the size of mini mansions lining both sides of the neighborhood. 

So this was the type of neighborhood that Daniel had grown up in. Very different then the small apartment she had spent her childhood at. 

Her nerves really began to act up as they pulled up to the house. It wasn’t larger or smaller than the other houses. It wasn’t a glass paned modern house, yet the simple white design and arched windows made it still seem an abode for the wealthy. 

Jiyeon followed Jenny out of the car and down the stone path, as she spotted the front door slowly creep open. 

That’s when she first met her. Daniel’s mom. She had seen pictures before, but seeing her in person. It was apparent where both siblings got their good looks from. She was beautiful with a younger face, that could’ve placed her anywhere from her early 40s to her mid 50s. 

“Hello Jiyeon-si.” His mother greeted in Korean, a much more natural tone than Jenny’s. 

Jiyeon immediately bowed respectfully, and held her hands in greeting “nice to meet you.”

Feeling his mother’s warm hands envelop hers, she felt a calming feeling, as the woman drew her into an embrace. It was very un-Korean, more of an American greeting. 

“It’s nice to finally meet you after all these months Jiyeon-a.” Her tone was much less formal now. 

“Yes, thank you again for your invitation, and for the plane ticket.” 

She shook her head, and pointed inside. “I’m just glad that you’re here. Shall I show you inside?”

…

Jiyeon crawled silently as she lifted to curtains slightly to peek through the window of his room. It was dark, but she could faintly see his father’s car pull up in front of the house.

“He’s here!” Jenny yelled from below, and Jiyeon quickly scrambled to look for a hiding place. 

She dove under the bed, hiding near the window, so that she wouldn’t be visible when he entered. Thankfully she could glance slightly and see from underneath, he had exited the car and was heading down the stone path towards the front door. She grinned as she leaned her back against the side of his bed in preparation. 

Everything was perfect. She had hidden her bag already and any traces of her arrival. 

Her eyes slowly gravitated towards her feet.

Her feet. 

.

She had forgotten her shoes by the front door. Would he notice? 

No way, right? Jenny had millions of shoes there. There was no way he would notice one pair out of place. Right?

“Daniel!” She could faintly hear his mother’s voice call out to him, and the sound of the front door opening. She began to scratch her fingers against her thigh. The recently done acrylics making tiny scratching noises as she did. 

She would see him soon. 

“Welcome back, we watched your game, you played great!” Jenny gushed towards her older brother. 

“Thanks sis, I’m really tired though, can I take a quick nap?” It was his voice. She was sure of it.

“Of course, Daniel. We’re just glad to see you home.” It was his mother’s voice. 

Jiyeon found it strange, the way he had described his mother to her was completely different. The woman who Jiyeon had talked to, and heard talking to him was warm and sweet. He had described her… well much differently.

She could hear the sound of his footsteps marching up the wood staircase. 

Pound. Pound. Pound.

At some point, Jiyeon realized it was actually her own heartbeat that was the cause of the percussions not the stairs. She could barely believe that she had mustered up the courage to continue with this plan. She was about to scare the living hell out of him.

She kinda liked the idea. The boy who seemed to always have everything planned out perfectly. The idea of a shocked expression with his mouth agape, was going to be crazy amusing. 

She heard him closer and closer, the sound of his socks against the flooring as he headed down the hall towards his room. This room. The room she was in.

She breathed out, wondering exactly what she was going to shout. 

Surprise? Boo? Welcome?

At that moment, she felt her heart freeze solid, just like it had all those years ago. She just wanted to hug him. She didn’t want to scare him, she just wanted to love on him. To be back in his arms. 

She couldn’t do this. 

His hand was on the knob now. The sound of the brass knob turning ever so slightly… 

This was it. Time to scare him! 

3

2

1

0.9

0.8

Why wasn’t he coming in? Jiyeon scrunched her eyebrows as she remained on her knees waiting for him to enter. 

Was he still standing in front of his door? The knob in his clutches?

Jiyeon began to bite her lip anxiously as she wondered what he was doing. 

“Oppa!” She heard Jenny suddenly scream out. 

Then she heard a slam. It sounded like he had collapsed. 

Was it because of fatigue? After all he had just played a long game, and then hopped straight onto a plane to LA. He must’ve been exhausted. 

And she was about to scare him? Jiyeon felt guilty. Making up her mind, she lept onto her feet and rushed towards the door. 

“Oppa what’s wrong?” Jenny repeated in a loud voice. Jiyeon could hear the rush of footsteps from his parents up the stairs as well.

“Jenny what is it?” It was his mother’s concerned voice. 

Jiyeon unable to bear the thought of her lover suffering any longer, swung the door open. 

“Daniel what’s wrong?” She cried out agony.

He was on the ground. Actually more specifically, he was kneeling in front of the door. Perfectly facing her. His head bowed. He was completely still.

Jiyeon felt tears rush to her eyes. What was wrong? Why was he like this? Was he hurt?

She knelt down in front of him, using one hand to tip his face towards her. His handsome eyes immediately bore into hers. Her jaw dropped as she noticed it.

He was weeping silently. Tears gushing down his cheeks. Short of breath.

“Daniel what’s wrong? Daniel? Daniel?” Jiyeon questioned in horror, as she began shaking his trembling shoulders. 

Slowly he seemed to snap out of his trance. His hand reaching up and wiping away the tears from his eyes. 

Even in the darkness of the house, the pitch black bedroom, the ambient light in the background illuminated his face perfectly. Gazing up towards her, his tight jaw even more accented by the shadows. His warm eyes massive and filled with admiration. 

Pure love.

“I missed you so much.” Out of nowhere both of his arms wrapped themselves around her shoulders as his head dropped onto her chest. His entire weight began pressing against her, as she struggled to keep both of them upright.

“Thanks for coming.” 

Jiyeon couldn’t hold back her own tears as her arms reciprocated his desperate embrace.

“How did you know you idiot? Huh? How did you know I was in here?” She whined, slightly upset, mostly curious.

“Your shoes. Those are the ones that we bought together.” He whispered as he ran one hand through her hair, resting her face into his shoulder. 

Jiyeon wasn’t sure whether she was more impressed or more frustrated. She was just helplessly falling for the boy in front of her. 

That’s when she noticed the legs of the three people around her. She had almost forgotten about them. This was her first time meeting them and this was their first impression of them together.

Realizing they had all backed up, now watching from a few meters away at their tearful reunion. Jiyeon felt her cheeks grow warm as she began to tap on his back to try and draw attention to his family.

“Your family is watching.” She reminded him in a hushed voice.

Slowly Daniel released her from his suffocating embrace. “I should shower, I must look like such a mess, I barely had time to rinse myself off.” 

Jiyeon stared at the near perfect appearance of the tall yet dashing boy in front of her. 

“You’re fine Daniel.” Jiyeon assured him quickly reaching down and grabbing his hand. 

The rest of his family had disappeared, and the aroma of the pie that she had seen his mother place into the oven began to make its way into Jiyeon’s senses.

“Your mother made dessert, let’s all eat together. I’m sure they want to talk to you as well.” 

Daniel chuckled nodding towards her, his usual goofy smile appearing on his lips. 

“True. They’re pretty weird, aren’t they?” 

Jiyeon shook her head adamantly. “No, I already like them so much.” 

His hand securely in hers, he led her from his room, and down the stairs to the kitchen of their massive house. However, before they began their descent towards the delicious smell, Daniel jerked her back towards him. 

The two of them now completely alone in the dark hallway of the second story. 

Jiyeon almost winced, except that he immediately silenced her lips with his finger. Her head bowed, her entire focus on the black cable knit turtleneck that displayed his muscular figure.

She felt her heart beat slower and slower, feeling his loving gaze bore into her. She felt a chill travel down her spine, slowly remembering just how much she had missed this feeling. The way the world came to a standstill, whenever he held her in his arms.

“Jiyeon-a. Can you look at me?” 

She didn’t want to. For fear her heart really might stop if she did. 

He gently reached down and tipped her chin up with his cold hand. She locked eyes with him, admiring his loving brown eyes. But it was only for a second, because they disappeared moments later. 

Noticing his intentions, she also allowed the visible world to disappear from her vision. His fingers were cold as they slid along her neck, his thumbs gently caressing her cheeks. It was warm. His breathe. She could imagine his lips now centimeters away from hers. 

Then she didn’t need to imagine any longer. Yearning. That was the word Jiyeon would to describe that kiss. 

After his decision to play in America. It wasn’t until he left that Jiyeon realized how much she wished they had spent more nights with him. She wished that she hadn’t scanned around nervously for possible paparazzi. Once he was tens of thousands of kilometers away, she started regretting the things they hadn’t done together. 

She couldn’t say it to him. She knew that he’d start doubting his choice if she did. But, somehow she felt like her feelings had been communicated through her kiss. Slowly, she felt his soft lips disappear from hers. The taste of his mouth still fresh on her tongue.

“I missed you.” She found herself confessing. 3 words that could have been meaningless after the sheer amount of times they had been repeated to each other. 

But they weren’t. Not when there was still genuine sincerity every time they were spoken. 

“I’m sorry.” He answered in a low voice. He was breathing heavily after their extended kiss. 

Jiyeon wasn’t sure what he was apologizing for, until he grabbed her wrist and tugged for her to follow him. 

She slowly came to the realization that she should’ve come to much sooner. A rationalized thought that any long distance couple could’ve come to.

Jiyeon wasn’t going to have dessert.

///////

Sorry for the late post. I've finally started writing again after a quite extended hiatus. Thanks for everyone who has continued to read, and I'll try to post the 2nd part to this within the next week.