YUBIN.

"Arin, have you seen my orange notebook?" Yubin asks as soon as her sister entered the room. She was too busy looking for her notebook on the pile beside her bed that she didn't notice the tiredness in her sister's face. Arin shook her head although Yubin wasn't looking. 

"I don't think I've seen it since the other day you were reviewing for that one GE." Arin answered, Yubin looked at her sister walking to her bed. Arin placed her bag down on her bed and laid down beside it with an exhausted sigh. 

"What happened?" Yubin asks again as she stood up to check her study table. She heard another sigh from Arin. Then silence. Arin is usually like this when she has P.E. classes but Yubin knows for sure that the girl doesn't have P.E. class that day. 

"Should I call her?" Arin muttered, it's like she's speaking to herself. Yubin stopped flipping the pages of the notebook on the table. Jiho.

It wasn't long ago when Arin last talked about this Jiho thing. The first one was when Jiho left, the second one was on Arin's birthday when Jiho didn't even call them, the last time was just a week ago. Yubin could tell that Arin's been thinking about Jiho more often now. She can't blame her sister. Jiho and Arin were so close when Jiho left and Arin must've really shocked by how the girl just left. Unlike her and the others, they knew that Jiho really loves leaving by sudden. 

"Who is it?" Yubin asks safely, she promised herself that she wouldn't be so obvious that she cared too much about the Jiho thing. And the last time she told Arin was that Arin should move on, not that it's because of what she had with Jiho but because she thinks her sister deserves better than waiting for someone who seem to not care. Yubin knows she once said she trusts Jiho but it's not acceptable to completely ignore Arin just like that. You're a total coward, Jiho.

"Jiho.." Arin whispered under her breath. Yubin didn't speak, she knew. 

"Aish nevermind, I'll take a nap." Arin announced, hugging her pillow and turning her back.

Yubin forced a smile and went back to her bed after acquiring the notebook she's been looking for. 

"Take a shower when you wake up." She says and Arin nodded. Yubin knows she won't really sleep.

It's been so long. Yubin actually didn't have time to think about Jiho in the past months, or year. Or that she just doesn't want to think about her. Plus, college kept her busy. It was really hard at first but she figured how to successfully ignore the Jiho-thoughts. Sometimes, she thinks that she's just hang up about Jiho because she's the first person she ever liked and that one day she'll realize that Jiho wasn't actually the one. 

Seunghee : sooorryy I fell asleep last night! :( 

There's been a progress in the past months. It was because of Jamie. The girl who kept following Seunghee. Yubin has been thinking about it since then, if Jamie didn't come, would she notice what she feels about Seunghee? IF not then how did this started?

10 months ago. 

"Hey Yubin, there's some girl looking for you outside." Who is it at this time? It's past lunch and Yubin recalls her friends are all at class. She took off her headset and placed her phone in her pocket. After closing her notebook, she stood up to walk towards the door. Luckily, their professor is sick so whoever this person is should have something good to say for disturbing Yubin's reviewing schedule.

And it's Jamie. I've seen her a lot, sometimes she walks Seunghee to our lunch room. Sometimes, she greets Seunghee when we walk pass her on the hallway. Sometimes, she just pulls Seunghee away from me. 

It shouldn't be annoying but Yubin weirdly feels annoyed whenever Jamie does that. Looking at Jamie, she's a lot better than me. Yubin was a lot quieter than her, she at socializing which is a total opposite of Jamie. And, it became more annoying for her when she listened to what Jamie wanted to say. 

"I know.. you're the closest to Seunghee. Will you help me get closer to her? Please? I really really like her." 

She heard a lot about Jamie from Seunghee and her other classmates. She's a nice, out-going and smart kid in Seunghee's department. Fortunately, she wasn't in Seunghee's class. I don't know why I was in relief after knowing that. 

Yubin had no choice, she agreed to the favor of Jamie. She hates how the girl is so nice to her when there she is, getting annoyed by whatever reason it is when Seunghee was with Jamie. Jamie would text Yubin sometimes, asks her about Seunghee's preferences. Maybe it's because Yubin and Seunghee are always together that she knew the answer to all of Jamie's question.

"Seunghee, why are you shaking?"

"Nothing, um. just.. nervous."

"Why?"

"Quiz."

"Oh."

"Didn't you study last night?"

"I did... but I don't know, I'm so nervous. It's like I have stomachache."

"Calm down.. You still have 3 hours, right? Give me your notes and I'll help you recall everything."

Seunghee nonchalantly opens her backpack and takes the notebook where she took down her notes for the subject. After Yubin received it, she scanned her notes and glanced at Seunghee who looks pale with eyes busy on the floor. She snapped her fingers at the level of Seunghee's face to get her attention. 

"Okay, so first question-" 

"SEUNGHEEEEEE" Wow, great timing. Jamie came, holding cup of... ramen on her hands. It made Yubin realize once again how fun Jamie could be because, it seems like she helped Seunghee recover from nervousness in just one call. 

"Hey Yubin!" Jamie gave her a little wave but taht's it and the two started to talk in their own world, leaving Yubin alone holding Seunghee's notebook. She closed it with a sigh.

Those times were terrible, a lot harder than it was with Jiho because Yubin already knew what she's about to feel based on her one-sided feelings for Jiho and now knowing there's like 80% chance that Jamie would win Seunghee's heart. What made it more messy is because she, Seunghee and Jiho are once a trio. How rude it is to catch feelings for the both of them. 

Yubin tried her best to act normal around Seunghee when she started realizing how she likes the other girl. She wasn't so sure if she could handle it well since Seunghee has been following her everywhere as well, her reason was because all of their friends were dating. She was right though. And Yubin wasn't complaining that Seunghee likes being with her, she's just nervous that she'll get worse than she was with Jiho. Where she tried her best to keep it to herself but somehow, Seunghee knew. 

That night when Seunghee performed on stage with Jamie and Mimi, Yubin understood the trouble she got herself in. She was captivated. She's seen Seunghee sing a lot before already but the way Seunghee stared at her that night, it was like Yubin saw hope that Seunghee might like her too. 

Seunghee knew Yubin had feelings for Jiho and that's what made it more and more complicated. What if the day comes that I can't keep what I feel for Seunghee and she thinks that I'm just some pathetic girl liking everyone who gives me attention. Seunghee wouldn't, but she's scared she might. Yubin was scared that  she's not sure of her feelings.

"How are you?" Hyejin places a cup of hot choco on Yubin's table. 

Yubin moved her book on the side and let Hyejin sit across her. The older is smiling at her. Hyojung isn't around today, Yubin wonders why. Hyejin is lucky there weren't much customers this morning. 

"I'm.. okay?" She answers, taking a sip from the cup. One thing she likes about Hyejin and Hyojung's cafe that wasn't in the library is the free drinks for her. The two told her she could always come to study since the cafe is calm everyday, the customers may also have felt the sense of silence and chill healing inside the cafe that even with a busy day, Yubin can still study because it's still quiet. 

"Hmm.. I see, can I ask you something?" Hyejin was fiddling her fingers. Yubin only noticed now that her eyes are puffy. Well.. Something happened. Yubin could feel it. 

"Of course, sure, tell me what is it?" 

Hyejin sighed. "Do you think people can be unsure of their feelings?" Oh.

That must be something. really something. Yubin didn't expect that question from Hyejin, out of all people. This unnie has a lot more love experiences than any of their friends. Yubin has no idea about her friends' lovelife recently especially Hyejin's. Their friends all think that she and Hyojung are a thing but Yubin sometimes sees her with some guy. It looked really complicated so she thought she should just not mind at all but now her friend is asking her.

"Can you elaborate?" She asks slowly, she feels like Hyejin might break anytime soon so she has to be sensitive asking too.

"Like.. you think you like someone but sometimes.. it's like-"

"You feel like you can't handle liking them." Yubin muttered while nodding. It was only after a minute when she realized what she said. She looked at her friend and held her hand. 

"Yes..?" Yubin nodded once again at her friend and smiled a little. 

"Unfortunately, I think we have the same question in mind." 

The two friends laughed together, but both with aching hearts. Seunghee came affter a few minutes and Hyejin excused herself, going back to the counter. 

"Huh, what are you two talking about?" Seunghee sat on where Hyejin was earlier, Yubin chuckled and placed her book back to her bag. The person she's waiting for is now here. 

"Nothing, why are you late?" Yubin asked the other. Seunghee made a face which made her laugh again. Ah I was worried for nothing. Yubin was actually worried that afte the talk last night, she and Seunghee might not be able to go back to how they used to. It took me two hours before finally send the text message to her. 

"What's our plan today?" Seunghee asks and takes Yubin's cup, drinking all of it. 

"Hey!" Yubin pouted, grabbing the cup back, checking if there's still more left but none anymore. "Thanks for the free choco." Seunghee says with a grin. 

--

"So what do you like about me?

"Huh?" Yubin stopped writing and looked at the girl across her. Oh here it is, oh my god what should I say. 

"Last night! You said you like me!" Uh-oh. Yubin bit her lip, avoiding Seunghee's eyes as she answered. "I didn't say that."

Seunghee held on the edges of the table, pursing her lips.

"You said-" 

"Fine, I kinda implied it. And?" 

"And what? What do you like about me?" Yubin didn't answer and Seunghee pouted. Yubin rests her chin on her palm, thinking of what to answer. What do I like about you, Seunghee? Ugh, I can't think about anything.. but Seunghee.

"I can't tell a specific stuff I like about you. It's hard so please don't ask me and just let me study." Yubin massaged her temples and tries to focus on what she's studying but it's like reading a book upside down.

Seunghee's face might have lightened as she heard that, weird. Weird that Yubin can't focus on the texts but on Seunghee instead. "Are we not going to do anything about it?"

"Like what?"

"Like you, asking me if I like you back?" Seunghee was responding fast, it makes Yubin's heart palpitate faster than usual. 

"Or are you not interested in my response?" She added. Yubin sets her pen down on the unfinished page of her notebook and faced Seunghee. Fine, you asked for this.

"Do you like me?" Yubin asked, her voice was low.

"Why would you.. ask... it.. like.. that" The short-haired girl laughed, seeing how embarrassed Seunghee is, she's blushing so hard. She might be an idiot for not noticing how she actually cares about Seunghee as.. a partner, for months or maybe years, but somehow she started feeling smart sensing that Seunghee is flustered right now.

But Yubin feels like it shouldn't be this easy. From her conversation with Hyejin earlier, how that simple question about feelings affected her. "I.. don't want us to be distracted. This.. Thing between us, it could wait, right? Let's finish our studies first."

"I understand." Seunghee gave her a big smile, looks like she's satisfied with their talk. The rest of the day went by with Seunghee following Yubin around, fortunate with her early dismissal, she could wait for Yubin's dismissal and they went together to the library.

--

"Are we going to call Jiho?" Mimi asks as they entered their favorite room. Seunghee volunteered to use her phone. After the graduation ceremony of Yooa, they agreed to meet at their usual place to get some rest and somehow catch up on one another since this is like a mini reunion to the group. Next school year, everyone will become busier and they might not be able to hang out like this again as often as they do. Yubin sat next to her sister. Mimi and Hyejin arranged the seats so that they're sitting in circle. They do this back then when they eat together.

"Hellooooo~ Where's the celebratory girl?" Seunghee waved on the screen as Jiho greeted them. Mimi grabbed Seunghee's phone and they started talking. Yubin crossed her arms, she glanced over Arin who's busy with her phone as usual. The others were talking, even Seunghee was there looking over to her phone where they talk to Jiho. 

They're like this whenever Jiho is on the phone, everyone except Yubin and Arin are there, their friends aren't forcing them to join anyway. They respect each others' decisions.

They talked about Yooa's plan after graduation, Mimi even joked that they should start living together. As if they don't do it already. Yubin thinks these two would get married soon and none of them would be shocked anyway. Good for them. She already once tried hanging out with them and she can see how faithful both of them are for each other. 

Yubin hid her phone back in her small bag and looked at Seunghee. Yubin can't stop feeling guilty, for some reasons, she feels like she's still attracted to Jiho. It's so hard. 

Everyone started taking about their plans on how to catch up on each other. They agreed that they'll continue talking on the groupchat and Hyojung told them they can always come over to the cafe if they're free. Adulting is really starting to sink to them and it's fascinating to see how they're even planning for their friendship.

Yubin watched as Seunghee brought her phone in between Mimi and Yooa who are talking by themselves. Jiho's face is in the screen, even laughing hard on the other line. "Jiho~ is~ watching~" Seunghee chanted. They heard the group laughing at Seunghee's wittiness. 

Yubin saw Mimi glancing at each one of them. "Please tell me not to hit her." Mimi says. Yubin smiled when she saw how Seunghee grinned, I missed this. They all started cheering, although she could see Yooa sahking her head.

Seunghee stood up, as if she's ready for boxing. Yubin started laughing at her friends, her sister started filming using her phone as Seunghee and Mimi ran all over the room.

"SEUNGHEE! MIMI! SEUNGHEE!! MIMI!!" Yubin heard Jiho cheering and adding fuel to the two fiery contestants of their very own friendly-type Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC). 

--

"I told you not to fight." 

"It's okay.. I can clean it on my own." Mihyun was holding on the desk of the chair she's sitting at. Yooa continued cleaning Mimi's wound.  Yubin sighed, Seunghee and Mimi wouldn't stop running earlier, they're like kids, as Hyejin described them. They only stopped when Mihyun had to run on the chairs which caused her to fall,  Seunghee also fell and got a few bruises on her cheek because her face fell first and here she is,

"Hey! Can't you do it more careful? It hurts okay!" Seunghee whined, Yubin scoffed and continued treating Seunghee's bruises, even pressing the cotton with the ointment harder on Seunghee's cheek. Didn't know she'll really fall from running. Yubin stared at Seunghee's face, earlier when she fell, her heart almost ached, Fine, I was a little worried but Seunghee kept whining.

"SHE'S KILLING ME!" Yubin pulled her hand away from Seunghee's face, biting her bottom lip. Ugh she's so annoying. I mean, I like her but sometimes I wanna hit her. 

"No! Shiah is killing me more!" Mimi yelled back from the other side of the room.

"I can't believe you two." Hyejin spoke, Yubin gave up and let Hyejin finish putting ointment on Seunghee's face. She sat next to Arin again and glanced on Jiho is still on the line, but she's busy doing something in her room, it's dark in her place, maybe it's night already? Hyojung and Arin stayed on their seats while waiting for them to finish with what they are doing (particularly just treating Mimi and Seunghee's wounds.)

"Hey, you said those words this morning too. Wow Seunghee and Mimi are on another level, making Hyejin say the same comment about them on different situations." Hyojung says, teasing the two who kept whining. Yubin heard Hyejin laughing along, "Look at Arin, she's a lot mature than you two." she says. Arin just smiled, feeling shy because Hyejin complimented her.

Yubin leaned on the back of her chair. She stared at her friends. Here's Hyojung next to her, clicking on her phone which Yubin assumes that she's ordering food for them all. Hyejin, after treating Seunghee's wound went to throw the used box of ointment on the trashcan. These two.. Yubin isn't the type of person who needs people to take care of her. She's used to be the one looking after her mom and Arin but when Hyojung and Hyejin came, she realized the feeling of being taken care of, the two really are like an older sister to her. Their group is actually a complete pack. There's Arin, the shy one. They have the jolly ones.. Seunghee and... Jiho. 

She glanced at the phone where she could see Jiho writing on her notebook, maybe she's studying. When Yubin looked at her right, she saw Seunghee pouting while checking her cheek through the glass on her phone. She cleared and looked away from Seunghee when the girl turned her gazed on Yubin. 

And.. there's Mimi and Yooa. At first, she really knew Yooa was a very studious person, and that her parents are strict. She loved how these two met, and how they love each other, makes Yubin wonder if they could get stronger in the next years. She hopes the two wouldn't end, their love story isn't like the usual ones, Well for the record, every love story is unique but Yubin like how Yooa and Mimi grew up and became mature(though Mimi is still so childish at times) when it comes to their relationship. She heard a few complaints from Yooa about Mimi this and that but at the end of the day, she'll see Yooa longing for Mimi. 

Will Seunghee and I be the same?

She saw Yooa patting Mimi's bandaged knee and laughed when Mimi whimpered. 

"Fiiine, sorry. Don't hit it anymore! I won't run like that again next time, promise." Mimi says, Yooa chuckles and sat next to Mimi. That's the usual position of the two as how Yubin always see them leaning against each other. There's no doubt that these two would never stop leaning on each other. They both know how to handle each other.

"Jealous?" A voice whispered against Yubin's left ear. Next to her was none other than Hyun Seunghee, she didn't even notice Seunghee sitting next to her. Yubin rolled her eyes and crossed her arms on her chest, she tried her best to not blush at Seunghee's presence.

"I told you to date me so you're not single-" 

Seunghee was cut off of course, Yubin's forehead flick is enough to shut her up. Yooa graduated. It occurred to Yubin that she's soon finished with college. Should she really put this.. thing with Seunghee on hold and decide later? What if.. time comes and she doesn't feel the same way anymore? That's what she's more scared about. Hurting Seunghee in the end. 

"I was joking, I'll wait of course." Seunghee smiled at her, Yubin can't help but to lean on Seunghee's shoulder. She's too nice for me.