SEUNGHEE.

"I don't think I can finish this today. My groupmates are both out of reach, I hate them. I hate them." Seunghee frustratedly ruffled her hair. She shoved her face on the pile of notebooks in front of her. There's no end to this. I'm dead and I hope my groupmates die before I do. She raised her head, blowing-- or practically sighing out the stress and exasperation in her stomach. I'm joking God, I'm not into murders and horrors.. but please send me a miracle.

"Hey, you kept whining for an hour, how are you going to finish that if you keep using your mouth?" Oh. Seunghee looked up at the ceiling her hands gestured into praying as she whispered. Thanks God for reminding me of this angel.

Seunghee saw how Yubin furrowed her eyebrows, should I ask for her help? Or should I be a little humble and cry for sympathy?  "But they're not helping me!" She pouted, her arms crossed over her chest which she knows that would never work on Yubin but at least she has to act for sympathy. Yes, she's going for that.

"Lower your voice." Yubin rolled her eyes and removed her reading glasses, Seunghee forced a smile. "Lower your voice", She's sure Yubin says that phrase atleast everyday because of her but Seunghee doesn't care because her voice is loud and she likes it when Yubin is being teased. She's cute when annoyed. 

Seunghee didn't notice how long has she stared at the other girl as Yubin used her handkerchief to wipe whatever it is on her jawline. Ya.. why is she doing that, she's not even sweating, the library is air-conditioned. Oh no, is she trying to seduce me?! Not gonna work. Seunghee sighed. Of course not, it's just Seunghee's wild fantasies. 

"Give me your homework and I'll do the balancing so please shut up and do your thesis now." Seems like Yubin noticed her sigh- and Seunghee managed to get a help from her angel. With sparkling eyes and a real smile this time, she leaned closer to Yubin, her forearms resting on the table as she did.

"Aww, you'll really do that for me?"

Yubin slowly moved away from Seunghee's face, her attention is now on Seunghee's notebooks. "I'm helping you for myself because I can't focus with all your noise." She says, Seunghee nodded and takes her green notebook out of her backpack. Yubin has been helping her a lot since they started hanging out often after Jiho left.

About that... Seunghee tried asking Yubin if she's okay, but she had to do it lowkey. She respects that Yubin doesn't want people to know that she likes Jiho and technically, she never told Seunghee about it, Seunghee didn't want to come out offensively meddling into whatever love triangle this is.. or is it just a triangle? NO, I DON'T LIKE Yubin LIKE THAT. Seunghee shook her thoughts off her head. How many months has it been since Jiho left?

"You can just ask me to leave though." Seunghee muttered and pulled her laptop from her bag, placing it on the table.

She glanced at Yubin who's now busy doing the balancing. "You won't leave though." The girl says softly. Seunghee wonders if Yubin is really cool with the Jiho thing now. Come to think of it, it's been more than a year since Jiho left.. and Yubin hasn't say anything about it nor Seunghee saw her talking to Jiho over the phone like how their other friends and Seunghee did to keep in touch with the girl.

--

Almost two years? What has changed? Mimi and Yooa are still dating like forever now. The two are in their fourth year and Yooa will be graduating soon. Unfortunately, Mimi has another year to go so it's more likely that she will be graduating with Yubin and Seunghee. Hyojung and Hyejin already graduated so they could only keep in touch in the group chats like Jiho but, unlike Jiho, they could meet the eldests on the cafe business that they started just a month ago. Surprisingly, the cafe has always been busy. The last time Seunghee got to hang out with the two was when Hyejin and Hyojung asked for help on buying stuff to be used on their cafe's interior.  

"I was actually scared you guys would want to go home after buying all these stuff without feeding me for my service fee." Seunghee says as she places the tray of their meal down on the table. They stopped by at Burger King to eat (because Seunghee keeps whining ofcourse). The other three started distributing and taking their food. Seunghee sat next to Hyojung and Yubin was across her. Seunghee thought she'd be sitting next to Yubin but it seems that the older couple wants to see each other while eating. Nah, I don't really know if they're a couple but duh, the between them is STRONG (though they're both soft) they can't fool me.

Hyojung took a bite on her burger then faced Seunghee while chewing, she paused for a while as she spoke. "Seunghee, Yubin isn't even complaining if Hyejin and I would just thank her."

Seunghee looked away from Hyojung and gave the older girl a tissue. She doesn't know if Hyojung is real or she's just lying about her age when she looks like a kid (yes I know I'm small too but this girl is worst that me when it comes to being a baby). Seunghee saw Hyejin holding out a piece of tissue napkin towards Hyojung who looked confused on which one of theirs should she take. In the end, she took both of their offer-- the tissue napkins, and cleaned the crumbs off her cheeks. Seunghee swore she felt a glimpse of competition in Hyejin's eyes. Hmmm.. These two huh. 

"Yeah, they're my friends so I don't need them to pay me for helping them today." Yubin says, Seunghee's attention quickly went to the girl across her. She pouted.

"Hey! I sound like a bad friend here!"

"We should've just brought Mimi unnie here." Yubin added, the girl was wearing her serious face once again but Seunghee knows it now when she's joking. Seunghee was about to speak to defend herself again when Hyejin shoved pieces of fries in . 

"There you go, stuff that loud mouth with food and stop whining, we're treating you already." 

Seunghee quickly munched the food in so she could speak. "Excuse me and my beautiful mouth, I'm only saying that-"

"Yubin, don't ever date her or you'll be deaf early." Seunghee stopped talking, Hyojung is clearly teasing her but it made her grin when she saw how Yubin stopped in motion when Hyojung said that. It took her about 4 seconds before responding.

"Of course not, unnie."

"Now this table looks like a double-date if you look at us." Seunghee spoke again, her forearms resting on the table as she comfortably sipped on the straw to the coke drink on the table.

"Uhm.. nope." 

It's like a double-date, but Yubin denies it. Choosy, I was famous and she doesn't wanna date me?? Doesn't she know that it's hard to find another Seunghee. hmph.

--

"I'm thirsty." Yubin says while chewing, Seunghee takes the water bottle from Mimi and Yooa who just came from the cafeteria. She was about to give it to the girl in need but Arin, who happened to be sitting between Seunghee and Yubin, already lent her water bottle to Yubin. Well they're sisters so it's okay. The five of them still meet in that room everytime they could. 

"Hey Seung, you still up for later? Yooa will be coming over to my place too, we can all play, Jiho said she's free tonight too."

Seunghee gestured her thumbs up. Aside from following Yubin around for whatever reason it is why Seunghee wants to do it, she also hangs out with Mimi a lot, plus Jiho on skype. They play online mobile games together sometimes, or watch a movie together at Mimi's place. Tonight's the first time that Yooa will join them. 

Yubin and Arin were just quietly eating. The last time she asked these two if they want to join them, they both said they're busy studying. Hah. They thought they could fool me. For sure, Jiho was the reason of these two. Seunghee could understand Arin but she doesn't know why Yubin is acting this way. 

"Are you two not coming? It'll be fun, Mimi and I will buy snacks later." Seunghee was anticipating for Yubin's answer, of course Arin's too but before the sisters could answer, someone barged in the room, suddenly kicking off the door open which caused a really loud noise in the hallway. 

"HYUN SEUNGHEE!!!"

Ah , not again. Seunghee excused herself from her friends, she could tell that Yooa and Yubin are both annoyed by what happened, while Arin and Mimi looked like they found it funny instead.

"Hey Jamie," Seunghee slightly pulled the door, not closing it as she doesn't have plans on keeping the conversation long because she's so hungry.

"Jamie, meet doorknob. Doorknob, meet Jamie." Seunghee took Jamie's right hand and guided it on turning the doorknob, as if she's teaching a 3-year old kid how to use doorknobs. 

"Ugh you're so boring," Jamie pulled her hand away and rested her hands on her hips. Seunghee peeked inside the room, checking her friends and her food. 

"I'm not! I'm just being a responsible student who doesn't like the idea of getting my favorite room's door destroyed by Jimin Park who doesn't know how to use doorknobs!" says Seunghee. Jamie chuckled, she told Seunghee that she likes it when Seunghee is getting teased. Jimin Park, she's the first girl who approached Seunghee on her first day in freshman, says she's a fan of Seunghee and that she always had watched her performances before. Seunghee didn't have any plan on giving this girl attention but it just happened that her friends are sometimes busy and this girl followed her like everywhere. 

"Now stop laughing and tell me why you're here."

"Would you join the upcoming singing contest by the gleects?" Gleects. A term the students in their university use to refer to the Arts Org, Seunghee heard of this event coming soon. They did it last year too and she came with her friends, except Yubin who said she doesn't have time for that. No.

"You know I won't join that, why are you even asking?" Seunghee turned to open the door again but Jamie pulled her by her wrist. 

"Please? I really want to participate but you know I'm not confident alone."

Seunghee sighed.

I'll think about it.

--

"So, if I wasn't here who would be the referee?" Yooa asked when they entered Mimi's room. Seunghee placed her backpack on Mimi's dining table and gave her friends a look. 

"What do you mean referee, there's no referee in mario kart, Yooa." Seunghee answers, she opened Mimi's laptop where they will call Jiho. While Seunghee is setting up the laptop, Yooa is taking care of their snacks, placing them on bowls so it would be easier to eat later. 

"Aww really, my wild guess is wrong then. You guys are three so I thought it's 1v1 and the other one would be the referee." Yooa.

"Shiah, we're not going to do boxing here." Mimi says, she walked to Seunghee and helped her with the laptop. It's not my laptop so I don't know how to use it but I'm still a genius. 

"Okay, I don't think we should play tonight because your girlfriend definitely doesn't know anything about games." After Seunghee figured how to connect to Jiho's server, she takes the laptop and followed Yooa on the couch. 

"Hey, I heard that." Yooa says as she placed the bowl of snacks on Mimi's center table. Seunghee on the other hand placed the laptop next to Yooa. 

"We really won't play today Seung." Mimi says and gives Seunghee the adaptor so they could charge the laptop while using it. Seunghee takes her laptop out of her backpack. Their plan is to use Seunghee's laptop for the movie and Mimi's for the videocall with Jiho. After setting up, Jiho finally answered the call and Yooa placed the laptop on the center table next to the snacks.

"Sorry guys, i took a quick shower." Seunghee heard Jiho spoke, she peeked over at the screen and her friend drying her hair with a towel. After waving at the camera, she takes her phone and searched up the list of trending movies. Mimi went to her room, to change maybe, while Jiho and Yooa continued talking.

"At night?" 

"Well yeah, but it's almost 3 AM here."

"Why do you sacrifice your sleeping time for playing with these two, Jiho?" Yooa asked and earned a look from both Seunghee and Mimi who just walked out of her room, holding a roll of thick blanket. Seunghee and Mimi started setting up the blanket where they will sit at and the cleaned the living room. Yooa remained at the couch.

"You don't have any idea how bored I am here."

"I know a girl who you can talk to that can relieve your boredom."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, the name's Arin. A cute girl, sister of Yubin. Does it ring a bell?"

"I hate you."

Seunghee laughed when she heard Jiho's response, Mimi just chuckled. Obviously, Yooa is teasing the girl and Yooa is improving when it comes to teasing. After seconds, the door opened, it's Yubin, Hyojung, Hyejin and Arin. Oof. Oh they did come. Mimi successfully invited everyone over tonight. Seunghee peeked on the laptop again and gestured at Jiho on the screen. "Code A" she mouthed while making the letter "A" using her fingers. She saw a confused look on Yooa's face but she just shrugged at the girl.

In a group of friends, there's always these people who shared memories together that they didn't share with the other friends. Mimi, Seunghee and Jiho had some kind of coding that only the three of them knew. Code A for Jiho's association with Arin. Yeah, Jiho called it association for her in-denial observable whippedness towards Arin. Code S for Mimi's girlfriend matters. I also don't know why they made it this obvious by using Arin's and Yooa or Shiah's initials. And Code B for Seunghee's future lovelife. Mimi and Jiho decided for the letter, they said that it's just a random letter but I know they're pushing me and Yubin together. Hah, Kim Jiho, if only you know.

The latecomers started talking about what happened on their way to Mimi's place. Hyojung was actually just a building away though but she was with Hyejin this morning and they had a task to do. Arin finished her homeworks and Yubin waited for her sister. 

"Okay, stop talking, you're all acknowledged by the one and only me now pick a movie Jiho. It's your call today." Seunghee says as she sat in between Arin and Yubin, somehow pushing Arin on the seat where the camera of Mimi's laptop is facing at. Arin looked shy at how she is too exposed to Jiho's camera and Seunghee noted in her mind to make Jiho pay her for this incredible idea. 

"Please, not horror." Mimi reminded Jiho who looked busy scrolling through her phone on the screen. They chuckled. The group sat on the middle of Mimi's room, in front of the center table her mother bought for her. Seunghee, Yubin, Arin, Hyejin and Hyojung sat on the blanket, Jiho (on the laptop) remained on the table across them, next to the other laptop. The couple-- Mimi and Yooa stayed on the couch. As long as they won't eat each other's faces in front of us, it's okay. So they better be behind us. 

"I'm okay with watching horror at 3 AM here, though." Jiho spoke from the other line.

"NO" And that, ladies and gentlewomen, are my scaredy friends Mimi, Hyejin unnie, Hyojung unnie and Arin. 

"YES" And that, ladies and gentlewomen, is the cutest person in this room, Hyun Seunghee.

"We can just watch something y after yknow." Yooa managed to get all of their attention with that statement. Ugh this ert.

Everyone reacted at what Yooa said, it's only her girlfriend who laughed at it.

"WHY WOULD WE WATCH THAT, THERE'S A KID HERE YOOA"
 

"It's okay. Whatever you guys want to watch" Arin answered quietly, busy eating the snacks even before the movie starts.

"Hey." Yubin nudged her using her elbow lightly. Seunghee looked at the girl next to her who was busy with her phone earlier for Seunghee assumes she's reading some e-book on it.

"Hey, you look short-haired today." Seunghee joked, she made herself busy with the rubik's cube she got from somewhere in Mimi's room while Jiho is still busy picking a movie. Her seatmate went quiet again though. Only after minutes of not being able to solve the cube, Yubin took it from her.

"You could have already solved this earlier, do you really know how to solve this?" She says. Psh. 

"Of course not, I just have to be nerd sometimes." Seunghee answered as she watched the girl solve the cube after a minute or two.

"That-" Yubin takes her hand and placed the cube atop of her palm. "Isn't smart at all." She added.

"Ready, guys?" Jiho asked from the screen. Yooa reached for a bowl of snacks from the table for her and Mimi. The five on the floor shared two bowls.

"Yep!" Mimi answered, the movie started. 

--

"What's this movie again?" Yubin asked one time when they already reached about 40 minutes of the movie.

"50 First Dates" Seunghee answered. She already watched this movie with her parents before, kinda awkward I know. While everyone is busy watching, Seunghee remembered Jamie's offer. It's not like her life is on the line or that she hates singing, she just doesn't feel like singing and wants to focus on college. But college isn't fun without experiences. Should I try again? 

She looked at Yubin who seemed to be.. not interested in the movie at all but still watching it. "How are you not touched at all?" She asked her.

"Uh.." Yubin paused and looked back at Seunghee before resuming. "I kinda expected what will happen? Happily ever after as usual."

Seunghee just scratched her head. Nah, this girl is hopeless romantic. Hopeless in romantic knowledge. But not 100% because she liked Jiho.  

"It's just weird why he would want to stay with her knowing she'll always forget who he is." Yubin added, she crossed her arms over her chest, her attention is on the movie again. 

"I would do that too though." Seunghee muttered. Yubin looked at her, she knows that look, she kinda memorized the messages in Yubin's eyes.

Seunghee continued to explain. "Because, for example, I fell in love with you, you make me happy in everything you do that even if I know we won't work and I wouldn't be perfectly happy with you, I would stay because no one else can make me feel the way you do." 

Seunghee answered casually, like as if she really felt that way. What. No, why did I feel that way.. why am I feeling this way? Wow. Even Seunghee was shocked with what she said. Huh.. where did I get that? She knew her heart fluttered when she said all of those words while looking at Yubin. Why the hell did I even look at her. She looked away from the other girl but she can still feel Yubin looking at her. WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT. 

That look in Yubin's eyes? That's confusion. Ugh I can't believe she doesn't understand what I just said. 

"Anyway, remember Jamie? Uhm.. she's asking me if I want to join her performance on the upcoming gleect event." Seunghee changed the topic. She really needs some advice on this one. 

"Uhuh, and?" 

"Should I go?" 

"Uh.. why are you asking me? It's your choice, what do you wanna do? It's not like you're busy to not go, you always make time for parties." Yubin answered continuously. Well, she's right.

"Yeah.. you're right" 

"You'll do well, we'll support you." Yubin says before taking a glance to their friends who are now busy talking with Jiho on the screen. 

--

The day-- or night came. Seunghee has been nervous since morning. She still had morning classes but she couldn't focus because her head was occupied with the event happening soon. She's just supposed to support Jamie's performance but Jamie distributed the lines equally and now she knows if she s up, she's ruining 1/3 of the performance. 

1/3, Mimi would join them. It was one of their practices when Mimi came along to check how Seunghee is doing and Jamie asked Mimi to sing a bit of their song, turns out her voice was husky and perfect for the rap. Seunghee doesn't have a background on Mimi's singing skills but she's sure Mimi gave her chills that day. This girl has it all. Mimi can draw, can solve Math, can sing, can dance, and now rap. What a traitor.

But still she knows what they've practiced is perfect. Only depends now on how they will perform it. I'm so nervous.

Jamie was sitting next to Seunghee behind the stage. She doesn't look nervous at all. Mimi is busy talking to Yooa on the phone. Those two can't last a minute without each other. Am I the only one being nervous here? 

The same feeling she had when she first sang for her elementary school's family day. That was her decision back then, just like how she decided to join Jamie on the stage now. I'll enjoy this. She tells herself.

Pretty boys, what's that?
I don't care what's that
Why are you saying sorry
To me that's you
Why are you so anxious again?
I'm always by your side like this

Jamie started. There are a lot of students and some of the professors watching them. Seunghee used to handle a lot more of them before. She felt something, unfamiliar. It's like she's anxious somewhat. Where is Yubin? Seunghee doesn't know why but she wanted to see Yubin, and when she did, she knew she'd be okay. 

Yubin was right there standing in the middle of the crowd, she was just looking at Seunghee. She knows Yubin is looking at her. Their friends are cheering for them, but she couldn't hear the crowd, It's like she's stuck in that staring moment with Yubin for whatever reason it is. It's her turn to sing after Mimi.

Don't let these haters come by
You better hold your head high
You don't need to care about what others think
There's no right answer
We're learning to fall while climbing these walls
You just need to be next to me like this
 

Seunghee has the talent, she started singing, just like she always does before. Only that this time, she's got a girl in the crowd to stare at. 

Stay beautiful now
The flower called you
It keeps on blooming for me
Don't lose your scent
Because I like it
Stay beautiful now
 

She closed her eyes after her turn, confused why her heart is beating fast. Yubin's face was too small to look at but she feels her heart fluttering when she looked at her. 

Even your flaws are OK
I want your honesty
I know that's only for me
I, too, want only you to hear all of me (That's right)

The performance ended soon. Seunghee clearly had a hard time performing again on the stage after a while, not because she's nervous but now because of what she felt earlier. What was that? God I'm in serious trouble.

"KIM MIHYUN HOW DARE YOU RAP LIKE THAT WHY DO YOU RAP WITH THAT TONE " Yooa hugged and yelled at Mimi as soon as they met each other on the backstage. 

"WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU" Yeah... they're shouting at each other while hugging.

"NOTHING I JUST LOVE HOW YOU DID IT"

"WHY ARE WE SHOUTING"

"BECAUSE I LOVED IT SO MUCH"

"They're weird." Oh. Why is she here. Ajdskjfjkh. No, that's muffled screams inside Seunghee when Yubin approached her. Everyone was there to congratulate them, especially Jamie. 

Seunghee glanced at her friends first, not that there are reasons to do it but she just needs to calm herself before talking to Yubin. "Yeah, madly in love." She responded. 

The two sat next to each other on the waiting bench. Hah.. I must be crazy. Seunghee whispers to herself. 

"Huh?" Yubin asked, wah did she hear me. Seunghee heaved a deep breathe before facing Yubin. Why am I now nervous around her.

"Are you really never interested about.. you know.. feeling that sparks thing towards someone?" Seunghee asked, for sure Yubin would think it's a random question but Seunghee doesn't mind. She knows Yubin once felt those sparks for sure.. just for someone else.

"I don't know." Yubin answered immediately, see this is another reason why I hate how my heart /fluttered/ because of her.

"You're boring." Seunghee tried her best to answer casually. 

"You are too." Yubin says as they both watched their friends laughing. 

"I know, but I'm excitedly boring."Seunghee says with confidence. Time to shrug these thoughts off.

"You did well tonight, you improved so much, no- um, you're already good before I mean, but this time, you're perfect on stage." 

Huh? How what.

"Wait.. You knew?" Seunghee faced the girl next to her who was looking at the ground. 

"Yeah, I live here, remember? I know you and everyone here knows your name." Yubin faced her too, with a smile. 

Comforting.

"Our friends don't." Seunghee says, smiling back at Yubin.

"Hmm. At least they know the real you." Yubin pulls out a bottled water from her bag and gave it to Seunghee.

"Aww you're sweet." Seunghee teased and takes the bottled water from Yubin. The program is still on, Jamie already left to hang out with her classmates, Mimi and Yooa are nowhere to find. Hyejin and Hyojung has plans on checking out the booths. 

"It's my first time attending this event but it's not my first time being paired up with you because of our busy friends." Yubin says and takes to bottle from Seunghee, she took a sip from it before closing the cap and putting it back on her bag. 

"Where's Arin though?" 

They stood up, it was like they both knew they have to walk somewhere to keep talking. Seunghee wears her coat as she followed Yubin. "I don't know, might be somewhere with her classmates."

"Sometimes, I forget that we have our own classmates." They both chuckled, that's true, they are more comfortable around their friends, maybe that's why.

"Yeah, we kinda got used to being just with each other but Arin's different, she has many friends from her batch now and that's good for her."

"Are you sure she got good friends?" Seunghee asks, well she still thinks Arin is a shy kid but it would really be better if she got many friends other than them. 

"I saw three of them one time, they seem nice although one of them reminded me of Jiho, a cold kid you know." Seunghee paused in her tracks for a second. Ah, how long has it been?

"It's nice hearing Jiho's name coming out from your mouth." She muttered. She never forgot how Yubin liked Jiho before.. or maybe until now. And that's a stupid case if I really have feelings for Yubin.

"What?"

Seunghee chuckles, she shrugged and hid her hands on the pocket of her coat. "I said, I think we better be called partners for real." 

"Nope, stop that." Yubin smiled and walked faster this time but Seunghee walked as fast as her.

"Whyyy, what's wrong with 'partner', it's not like I'm taking Jiho's place in your heart." Oof. Yubin finally stopped walking and gave her a confused look.

"You knew?" Seunghee couldn't understand how Yubin asked. Does she still feel the same for Jiho?

She faced Yubin. They really stopped walking and stood in the middle of the field where people are all having fun.

"Kinda obvious.. for me." Seunghee answered, Yubin stayed silent for a minute and she just let her. She knows Yubin has been keeping this as a secret for almost 3 years already and she understands if Yubin is shocked. She just hopes Yubin doesn't like Jiho anymore.

"I don't-" Yubin was cut off when Mimi and Yooa came. Oh yeah, of course, there would always be a cliffhanger. 

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." Seunghee whispered as they walked behind the couple, she was sure she saw Yubin smiling.