“When a child is born, the whole Universe has to shift and make room.”

 

As if God heard my prayer, Yuri came in through the door holding Amber’s document.   “How is it going?” She sounded so cheerful that I felt like knocking some sense into her.   Amber inhaled deeply and straightened up, grabbing the bottle of water to take a sip before putting it back to its place. I still held her close because she looked so worn out and weak despite her tough exterior. Now that Yuri was here, I felt somewhat relaxed and I exhaled a sigh of relief. But then something pungent hit my nose and I had to scrunch up my face in response. It wasn’t a distinct smell, but very subtle. It was like wet dirty socks. What is that?   “Fine,” Amber said, but her appearance told us otherwise.   “It’s going to come quicker, Amber,” Yuri said evenly, “and the pain will get stronger.”   Yuri put the document on the countertop of the sink and took out her pen to write on it. When Amber’s hand gripped my arm again, I knew the bloody contraction had returned. I glanced at Yuri for guidance, but she had to finish writing before calmly coming over to us and squatting down next to me. She put her hand into the water to touch the bulging part of Amber’s stomach as she said, “Take a deep breath, Amber, in and out.” Her other hand ascended to a nurse clock on her left chest as she watched the second hand ticking by.   “Oh my God!” Amber yelped before taking in a big gulp of air and grunted in pain as she squirmed in the water. Her hand holding on to the railing on the other side of the bath was almost white. This one contraction must be big.   I felt her nails digging into my flesh, but I ignored it. It was nothing compared to what she must be feeling at the moment. She looked so fragile in this situation and yet so strong. A pang of jealousy hit me as I watched this girl going through all this ripple of pain to bring L’s baby out into the world. Her sacrifices awakened a yearning in me to have what L has, a girl who’s willing to do something like this for me because she loves me.   “Yuri…” Amber grunted loudly as she was close to tears. “I feel like pushing.”   My body froze instantly. Fear engulfed me. Did I remember to breathe?   “Are you feeling pressure on your bottom?” Yuri inquired and Amber nodded. Her body felt so frail against me, it was a wonder how she managed to get through all this pain in the past five hours. “Do you feel like you need to do number two?” Amber nodded again as she exhaled a deep relaxing breath when the contraction finished.   “I’ll examine you again. You might be fully.” She then turned to me. “You might want to leave for this bit, Yeol.”   I complied with her suggestion as she stood up and I followed her out. “Is there anything I can help with?”   “Can you get a Doppler out from the nightstand draw? It’s a radio type of thing. It’s gray and the transducer is light blue. There’s a bottle of gel next to it, get that too please.”   As Yuri did whatever she needed to do, I went to the draw and started looking for this thing Yuri was talking about. When Yuri returned to the bathroom, she reminded me to get a camera from the bag we had brought in earlier, containing Amber’s necessities for the next few days and some baby clothes. When I found the Doppler thing, the gel bottle, and the camera, I strode to the bathroom door and waited. I stood there wondering whether I should leave or stay. I’d stay, but… probably it wasn’t a good idea when Amber was in the bath. L could kill me. No, he would. He wouldn’t mind getting his knuckles bruised or his permanent good record tarnished as long as it involves Amber. I shuddered at the thought and suddenly felt scared for my life. He is scarier than the Grim Reaper. To let my frustration out, I grabbed Yuri’s phone and sent one simple message to Min Ho.

 

  

 

I slipped the phone back into my pocket and exhaled, feeling better that I had told someone of my blind fear.   I felt my heart leap when Yuri said, “Your cervix is fully dilated.” A pause followed, during which I believed the ladies were exchanging relieved glances. “You’ll be a mum soon.” A sound from the water came. It was probably Yuri squeezing Amber’s hand or something to encourage her.   All this turned for the worst, for me. We shouldn’t be too happy because after that announcement, the wave of rush intensified and lengthened, leaving Amber to cry even harder. I didn’t how it happened; I ended up back in the bathroom, holding Amber’s hand. It all happened too quickly. I had my back on Yuri, so as to not let myself see whatever was on that side, and I focused on Amber’s face.   I felt terrible when she cried and demanded for L after each push attempt. My heart rate increased with nervousness since I didn’t know what to say, pretty sure I was sweating too.   She sobbed and shook her head in exhaustion. “I can't do this, I need him. Where the hell is he?”   “Yes, you can, Amber,” Yuri countered firmly after she caught Amber’s eyes. “You’ll get through this. You’re strong, you’ve gone this far, don’t give up!”   I watched the way Yuri talked to Amber, her tone of voice, and her response whenever the co