White.

 

Everything is white.

 

Wether he looks to the front or back, left or right, up or down, all that he sees is the white. There’s no lines for where sides meet, as if they never meet, but they’re all still connected. It’s limitless, endless.

 

He’s tried searching for an exit, or at least an end, but it’s impossible for him to do so in his current state. His body is too heavy, too tired, and too limp to move. His wings are just a dead weight thrown over him, as he can’t even unfurl them, or at least fold them. They just lay over him like a heavy blanket, falling to the ground where he’s on his knees, has been for so long. There’s no energy flowing through his body, his limbs no more than dead logs, barely supporting his upper body and keeping it in an upright posture. 

 

He thinks that maybe if time passes, he’d be able to gather some energy to move from that spot, but no matter how still he stays, no matter how long he waits, his body remains as useless as ever. A part of his mind tells him that maybe if he sleeps it off, he’d wake up stronger, but after closing his eyes for so long without being able to doze off, he remembers that the concept of sleep is completely foreign to the body he’s currently in. And yet, weakness has never been part of this body’s biology. 

 

After a lot of struggle, he manages to pitifully crawl for a few steps, then he stops, body completely refusing to cooperate anymore. He does some calculations in his head. If every while he pushes his body to make the same distance, how much time it will take him to reach the imaginary goal he set for himself, and how long it will take for him to reach, or at least see, an end. 

 

He almost got a detailed plan in his head, when he realized that he’s missed the most important detail. In his state, and in this place, he has no conception of time. How long it has taken him to gather that much energy, how long it took him to drag his body that meaningless distance, how long he’s been here, he knows none of those. It can be hours, days, months, or even years. It can be just minutes or seconds. 

 

So this is what this punishment is about, he realizes. To be rendered useless, thrown in a timeless, endless, space of white. 

 

Too white. 

 

He’s lived his whole life in white. His wings, his outfit, his never-changing aura, and everything holy, it’s all white. But he doesn’t love white anymore. He despises his useless wings, he despises the responsibilities that comes with his outfit, he despises that he’s forbidden from having emotions, and he despises being a cupid. 

 

He hates white.

 

He closes his eyes, and tries to remember what colors were like. He imagines himself surrounded by colors, and tries to choose which one was his favorite, because it never crossed his mind to choose one before. Was it blue? Not the sky blue, but the blue of the sea, where he and Brian had played for an afternoon. Or was it yellow? Brian’s favorite hoodie was yellow, and it suited him so well, made him look like a big, fluffy kid. Then what about pink? That lovely color that dusted Brian’s high cheeks after every compliment. Oh and red, the color of Brian’s lips after a passionate kiss shared between them in the calm of his apartment. 

 

But brown is really special too. It’s the color of Brian’s brilliant eyes. Those eyes that held too much kindness, gentleness, depth, and love. Those eyes that reflected all of Brian’s feelings like a mirror, that made his heart like an open book to read. Those eyes that had filled with tears as he looked at him for one last time. 

 

Brian, the human that made him love and appreciate colors more, the human that made him experience all kind of colors, from the brightest to the darkest. Brian, the human that made him hate white, because white is what tore them apart. And the white surrounding him is supposed to wipe all the colors from his memory. This white, that already took everything from him, is going to rip all memories of Brian away from him. He won’t allow that to happen, at least not so soon. He’ll keep the colors engraved in his head and heart as long as he can. He’ll protect Brian with the last bits of his sanity. 

 

He was given the chance to avoid this white, but he’s rejected it. Does he regret it? Never. If time goes back, he’d still choose spending a few months with Brian, followed by an eternity of white and loneliness, over not having to experience the beauty of loving Brian and being loved by him just to keep his previous life. His one and only choice will always be Brian, and his only regret would be not spending enough time with him, and not showing him how much he loved him enough. 

 

The happy, colorful memories they’ve made together are what’s giving him enough strength to endure the lonely, unbearably white infinity he was thrown into. 

 

And he doesn’t want to forget. 

 

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

 

 

To say that Park Hyeji is furious at the moment, is a big understatement. 

 

“Cupid H03,” the other cupid monotonously says, his gaze indifferent, “you can’t keep doing this.”

 

Cupids are not supposed to use violence, but right now, she wishes she could at least slap him across the face, maybe then he’d listen to her. 

 

“Oh you know I can, as long as you keep denying me access,” she challenges back. He just gives her another bored look. To think that he’s way newer than her just adds to her fury. She tries to hold it in, nevertheless.

 

“There are more pressuring issues at the moment,” he repeats, for the hundredth time, as if he’ll make her understand this time, “yours has been already discussed and given its time. You can’t be this selfish.”

 

Did he just have the audacity to call her selfish? To hell with being calm! She slams her hand over his ivory white desk. The bang it causes is loud, but it does not echo in the open space around them. 

 

“I’m trying to fix a gravely made mistake right now,” she snaps, tone venomous. 

 

The cupid is obviously holding back from rolling his eyes, “Extreme punishment are not given hastily, and you know that. And most importantly, it’s not possible to inverse them. You’re just waisting your time here.”

 

She scoffs, “It’s not impossible, it has happened before, once. I checked it,” she states, confident. When he finally frowns in distaste, she smirks, satisfied. “It should’ve happened more, but it’s scary how the Elders never admit their mistakes.” 

 

The cupid purses his lips together, visibly fidgeting, “You were given the powers to alternate between both dimensions for a reason, stop using it for the wrong purpose,” he scolds, trying to change the focus of their discussion. 

 

Hyeji crosses her arms over her chest, glaring down at him, “This is exactly the purpose of my powers, or shall I remind you that Cupid J159 was my responsibility?” 

 

Only that she gets in response is an annoyed sigh. He’s now refusing to even acknowledge her presence. “Are you letting me in or not?” She demands one last time, her patience running thin.

 

Without lifting his eyes from the surface oo the table, he nonchalantly says, “You’ll have to wait for another time-”

 

“Oh cut the crap!” She finally snaps, being totally done with his never changing response. He’s been telling her the same thing for weeks now. 

 

 

Hyeji has kept silence for so long. She’s watched Jae going through hell, standing in front of a crossroad with two equally awful outcomes. She’s believed that she couldn’t do anything to change his destiny, and stuck to just being a bystander. But after he was gone, the guilt refused to let her at peace. So, she’s went once more through his records, not in search of something in particular, but in hopes of finally convincing herself that there’s nothing she could’ve done. 

 

What she ended up finding, though, is a small loophole, and the details that seemed irrelevant at first, suddenly became a silver of hope.

 

It took her some time to fully go through everything. For once, she could use her authority to freely study the records and collect as much proofs as possible. Dowoon had a lot to say as well. But her demand for another trial kept being rejected over and over again, the gatekeeper blocking her access, even though she usually could meet the Elders without asking for permission. It’s as if they knew what she wanted and didn’t want to listen to her. They seemed to underestimate her stubbornness. She could do this for years.

 

However, Brian has unexpectedly found out about Jae’s punishment, increasing her urgency to bring justice to Jae’s name. She just couldn’t bear seeing him like that. It was not supposed to end like this. They both didn’t deserve this ending. 

 

 

The other cupid takes some time to react, taken aback by her outburst. Hyeji uses that opportunity to calm herself a little bit. She then puts on her evilest smile and tells him, “It’s okay if you don’t let me in. I’ll just forward this directly to the Supreme Court.”

 

He rudely scoffs, “What exactly are you going to tell them? You’ll be only waisting their time and yours, that if they agree to let you in.”

 

That only makes her smirk, “I have enough evidence to prove that the Elders have inflicted pain on a human. This ain’t a threat or empty words,” she emphasizes, words loud and clear. “Believe me, it will better if they’re the ones to take it to the Extreme Court, it will tarnish their credibility less, don’t you think so?” 

 

The gatekeeper looks like he’s finally considering letting her in. He should be, unless he’s really unaware of the seriousness of their situation. After a long moment of silent thinking, he allows her to meet one of the Elders, with a gritted ‘be quick’. 

 

With her smug smirk, she apparates inside of one of the judgement spaces. She’s familiar with all of the Elders, and she’s glad the one she’s currently standing in front is one of the most understanding. 

 

“I was told you’ve been causing trouble,” the old cupid speaks before she gets the chance to politely greet him, “It’s unlike you to invest this much effort over a finished deal.”

 

“It’s not finished!” She objects, just a tad loud but not disrespectful, “There has been a mistake.”

 

The Elder fixes her with a hard look, almost offended at the accusation, “I believe that we’ve been quite generous with Cupid J159. Despite his obvious rule breaking, we have given him a chance to fix his mistakes. As for his final punishment, we have dutifully followed the rules. I highly doubt there’s a cupid who ignores the consequences of dating a human, and he did what he did while being totally aware of it. There was absolutely nothing that we could do for him.”

 

“It’s true that you’ve given Ja- Cupid J159 his chance, but the human is the one that ended up hurt in the aftermath.” 

 

She gets an unconvinced raise of eyebrow in return, “The human was given his chance as well. The objective of the mission was obvious, and successfully fulfilled. He was shot with a true love arrow, wasn’t he?”

 

“He was.”

 

“Then what happened afterwards does not concern us,” he doesn’t say the words lightly, like he’s just glad he doesn’t have to worry about that part, but lets them carry the heavy weight of reality. The rules are not supposed to be kind. 

 

“Of course it does not,” she agrees right away, knowing the importance of that statement, “but you’re forgetting our main purpose.” 

 

The Elder gives her a curious look, so she further interprets it for him, “We are descendants of Angels, and an Angel’s purpose is to protect and care for humans. Angels, and Cupids by consequence, should never hurt a human.” 

 

He frowns in concern rather than anger, “Are you implying that we hurt the human?”

 

Hyeji nods, “You could’ve punished Cupid J159 for not shooting that arrow from the very beginning, and that human would’ve spent the rest of his life as a loner and he would’ve been content with just that. But the moment you’ve given Cupid J159 that mission, you held yourself accountable for the happiness of Kang Brian. If the person he’s fallen for was a human, your responsibility would’ve ended just there, but since it was a cupid -and Cupid J159 out of everyone- it made you more responsible, because your decision -that punishment- is what made that relationship possible in the first place. That means that when you’ve banished Cupid J159, you intentionally hurt Brian, gravely.”

 

The Elder has been listening to her patiently, with a focused frown. After she finishes, he purses his lips in contemplation, before he speaks, “I understand your point of view, but this is not as simple as you’re making it sound. There’s a lot of aspects and perspectives to this story, and it’s not up to me or you to decide whether giving him the Extreme Punishment was a mistake or not. There’s no scale to weight things out, and there are rules. I’d help you forward this to the Supreme Court, but there isn’t a strong enough reason to make it worth their attention.”

 

“I understand,” she nods. Maybe it’s time to bring out her last card. “But what if I tell you that Cupid J159 and Kang Brian were soulmates?” 

 

The Elder’s face pales instantly, turning as white as his hair, “What?”

 

Bingo!

 

 

 

-

 

 

 

 

“Cupid J159.”

 

His eternity of white is suddenly interrupted by a grave voice, calling a name so foreign to his ears. 

 

‘That’s not my name’, he wants to tell whoever is calling, ‘My name is Park Jaehyung, call me by that name!’ He wants to shout to them, but his tongue refuses to move. The disconnection between his brain and body has been getting worse, that he’s long since stopped trying to move. 

 

“Cupid J159, can you hear me?” The voice calls one more. It doesn’t sound so muffled, as if his ears are covered, or there’s something like glass separating him from the voice’s owner. 

 

Slowly, he lifts his head just enough to see who has been calling. The movement, no matter how small it is, still requires all of his strength and focus. The first thing he registers is that he’s no longer in the same space as before. He’s still surrounded by white from all angles, but this one is different. It’s less suffocating, less open.  

 

He then realizes that there are more than one cupid in front of him. There’s a long white table, with about ten, very old cupids, all looking at him with stony eyes. It’s another trial, he thinks. But weren’t they done with him? The final verdict was given all that time back, what is he doing here? Was there another rule he broke and they forgot to judge him for? But didn’t they already give him the highest level of punishment? Or all that pain was not enough? He highly doubts he has anything left for them to take.

 

“You’ve been summoned here because of the particularity of your case. The members of the Supreme Court has gone through it multiple times, doing a thorough investigation for every detail, and a lot of exceptional happenings came to our attention. We will be asking you a few questions, and you should answer clearly so that we can confirm each of our findings.”

 

He doesn’t nod, but another cupid is already talking, not giving him enough time to absorb the situation.

 

“First, as mentioned by your advisor, Cupid H03, on the day of the accident, you were able to see the death aura surrounding the human Kang Brian, is that true?”

 

Fueled just by the mention of the name, Jae nods without difficulty, certain and firm. And suddenly, there’s energy flowing through his body, as if he’s slowly getting recharged, still, it wasn’t enough for him to start moving freely. His body needed some time, but the cupids seemed to be in a rush, or they just didn’t want to wait.

 

They kept asking him questions, about all the particularities that had happened between him and Brian -the accident, the arrows, Brian’s dreams that were not dreams, their auras, and more. And he kept answering, even if it’s only by moving his head, whether to shake it or nod. Some of the questions were directed to Hyeji, that he’s registered has been sitting to his side the whole time but he didn’t have the energy to turn to glance at her. He was glad that she was there, nevertheless, as she kept mentioning a lot of details that he couldn’t manage to tell, as he couldn’t talk yet. 

 

Jae has no idea as why this trial is being held, or where it’s going, but he’s willing to cooperate. He has nothing more to lose anymore. He’s lost everything already. 

 

 

“I have to admit that your case here is very curious,” the cupid sitting in the middle says after the long questioning. “If you were able to see the aura of death, that means that Kang Brian was not supposed to die on that day. His destiny was to be saved by you. A rule was broken when you touched him -that’s true, but at east ten more were followed. As descendants of Angels, our innate duty is to serve humans, and you did just that by saving him on that day.”

 

Jae blinks at him cluelessly, all words flying over his head, his mind too slow to even process them. A cupid sitting at the far left clears , catching his attention. She smiles faintly at him, then starts her slowly explanation of whatever is happening.

 

“To put it more clearly, Destiny wanted you to meet Kang Brian from the very beginning, that’s why he could see you even before you have turned into your human form.” 

 

Destiny? Well Destiny was cruel to them from the very beginning. What was the point of bringing them together just to tear them apart just like that?

 

“However, this is not unheard of. Destiny has made a lot of cupids and humans meet before. What makes your case more unique is that Destiny wanted you to fall in love with each other. You getting shot by a True Love arrow was not a mistake. It was something bound to happen, no matter what. And your auras,” she pauses, as if searching for the easiest way to explain it to him. He’s thankful for the effort, even if his brain is refusing to work at the moment. 

 

“It is not easy for humans’ auras to melt together, let alone a human’s and a cupid’s. Do you realize the meaning of this?” She slowly questions, her patience with him never wavering.

 

Jae shakes his head. Honestly, he’s never been as confused in his entire life. 

 

She nods her head with another understanding smile. It kind of makes him hopeful, but then he remembers that hope is lethal. It has deceived him too many times already, and he’s sworn to not fall in its trap ever again.

 

“It means that you and that human are meant to be.”

 

There’s too much delight in her tone, that it only further confuses him. When he gives her another helpless look, the cupid by her side interferes, literally spelling it out for him, “Soulmates is the technical word for it.”

 

’Soulmates’, the word echoes inside of his head, paralyzing whatever little thinking ability he still has. ’Soulmates’, a word that should fill him with warmth and happiness, but brings him nothing but sorrow and grief. What’s the use of such revelation when it’s too late, when they can never be together? It’s like they’re rubbing salt in an open, profusely bleeding wound. It’s burning, it’s painful, and it’s going to leave a nasty scar. 

 

Another cupid speaks then, “Both punishments you have received were just and fair, in accord to the rules you have broken. However, the repercussions of giving you the Extreme Punishment were miscalculated. No one has expected that the human would end up sharing the burden of it with you.” 

 

‘Enough!’, Jae wants to scream, wants to cover his ears. He doesn’t want to hear any more of this. He doesn’t want to know how much Brian is hurting because of him. He doesn’t want to imagine it. He wants Brian to remain as a happy memory in his mind. Or are they going to deny him even that? 

 

Going against his wish, someone keeps talking, and he can’t mute the sound, “Knowing that you are his soulmate, we can’t be the reason behind your separation anymore. That’s why, the court has decided to reconsider your punishment.”

 

Jae has lost track of who’s talking at the moment. He only sees mouthes move and hears voices reaching his ears. He sees and hears, but nothing feels real anymore. Maybe hallucinations were part of his punishment.

 

“Using the authority given to us as members of the Supreme Court, we deem the previous ruling invalid, and we will decide on a new one.”

 

“Having taking everything into consideration, the court has decided to spare you of your duties as a cupid, in exchange of fulfilling your duties as Kang Brian’s soulmate. You will completely turn into a human, both in form and nature, definitely. You would never be able to regain your position as a cupid.”

 

If Jae’s brain was well functioning, he would’ve said ‘good riddance’ without hesitation. Fortunately, it has more important things to focus on, like trying to differentiate reality from delusion. The only thing convincing him that this may be actually happening, is that he’d never imagine a similar thing happening, not even in his wildest dreams. Even his subconsciousness is not this hopeful. 

 

“But be aware, after you turn into a human, Cupids’ rules won’t apply on you anymore, but if you willingly break your bond with your soulmate, Destiny would punish you, since it’s what brought you both together.”  

 

Jae nods soullessly, frozen in his spot and it certainly is not due to his lack of energy. He feels a hand on his shoulder, so he half turns to the side. Hyeji’s happy grin greets him, and it only further adds to his incomprehension. 

 

“Jae,” she grins at him, obviously overjoyed about something. He almost cries at the call of his human name, though. He’s missed dit. 

 

“You’re going back to Brian.” 

 

And that’s when it clicked, when his mind finally absorbed the situation, and- God please let this be true! 

 

If this is truly just his imagination, or part of his punishment, then he doesn’t know how he’ll handle the disappointment. The weakness and the infinite white suddenly sound more merciful.  

 

“He’s waiting for you,” Hyeji tells him again, her gaze softening, “Brian has been waiting for you.”

 

Jae hates how he gives in to his desires and the hope, he hates how he smiles back and grabs her arm desperately, “Take me to him,” he pleads, his voice finally working, albeit weak.

 

Behind him, he hears three knocks on the wood, so he closes his eyes, bracing himself for the worst. 

 

 

The world around him swirls and shifts, like he’s falling backwards, and when it steadies back, there’s no one by his side. He takes in a shuddered breath before opening his eyes, dreadful. It’s dark. He’s surrounded by darkness this time. His heart almost drops into a pitiless hole if not for the scent that takes over his senses. 

 

Brian’s scent.

 

Not finding any difficulty moving anymore, he lets his hand wander over the soft surface underneath him, and he registers that he’s currently sitting on the bed. It’s the same spot he was at when they took him away. The realization could’ve been biter if not for the surge of excitement and happiness that overtakes his body. He bolts out of the bed, bare feet running over the cold tiles. Despite the complete darkness, he easily finds his way out fo the room and into the living room. He’s too out of it to consider turning on the lights. 

 

The lamp is the only source of light in the large space, but it’s enough to guide him. His eyes dart around the room almost maniacally, in search of the owner of the apartment. He finally finds him, sitting to the dining table, a small cake in front of him with a single candle on it. A flying thought tells him that today is Brian’s birthday. How long has it been then? Just a few months, or more than a year? How many birthdays did he celebrate like this? There will be time for these questions later, he hopes as he dismisses them.

 

Jae’s heart leaps in his chest, for how much he’s missed him. And this can’t be an illusion, because that’s Brian, right there, in his coziest sweater, his eyes closed as he’s making his birthday wish. Jae silently walks closer, not being able to stand the distance anymore, but not wanting to startle the other, as well. Brian is too absorbed in his wish-making, that he doesn’t hear him sitting on the vacant chair. Jae does everything in his power not to reach and wipe away that single tear that’s sliding down Brian’s cheek. He’ll wait until he’s seen him, first.

 

The words of the cupid replays in his mind, making him finally understand the meaning of Brian sharing the burdens of the punishment with him. Jae was fooling himself when he’s thought that Brian would be okay after he’s gone. Brian looks anything but fine. Definitely not happy.

 

 

Brian blows the candle before slowly opening his eyes. One blink, then another, before his gaze lifts from the cake to Jae’s face. He keeps staring at Jae as if he’s just seen a ghost. The blinking and the staring continue for a while that it gets him concerned.

 

“Happy birthday, Brian.” Jae softly says, finally breaking the silence. He then waits for its effect to take place.

 

Nothing happens for a few seconds, but then, unexpectedly, Brian smiles at him. It’s sad and teary, but it’s a smile, nevertheless. 

 

“It seems that birthday wishes are more efficient than those of shooting stars,” he chuckles, but it’s dry and anything but humorous. “Or is this my gift because I did everything you’ve asked me to do on my birthday?” He asks, voice breaking at the end. 

 

A faraway memory resurfaces in Jae’s mind, and his eyes well with tears instantly, his heart squeezing and contracting painfully in his chest. Not only Brian remembered, but he also followed that nonsense plan of his. 

 

Drip. Drip. A tear falls to the surface of the table, followed by another, and another. “I- I miss you.” 

 

The words are barely a whisper, brutally interrupted by a sob, but Jae hears them clearly. It kills him how Brian doesn’t believe that this is a reality, just like he did in the beginning. It’s like he’s used to seeing illusions of Jae, and that only makes it the more concerning. Brian was supposed to move on.  

 

Brian’s eyes follow him closely as he stands up, and walks towards him. Jae then crouches down, almost kneeling on the ground. Even while looking down at him, with just a few inches between them, Brian doesn’t seem to believe that he’s real, yet. 

 

Slowly, Jae’s hands reach for Brain’s that are in his lap, and rest over them. Brian inhales sharply, his eyes widening, the touch making him finally realize how real this is. It’s making Jae realize how real this is as well. He’s missed Brian’s touches so, so much, words would never be enough.

 

“Brian,” he misses calling his name like this as well, “I’m home.” 

 

That’s what Brian always says when he comes back from work, and Jae would consider their parting a day spent at work. No matter how long it has been, whether a few months, a year, or even more, he’s just glad that he’s back to Brian. His home.

 

Brian shakes his head in denial, his tears unstoppable, endless, “Jae- Jae is gone. They took him away. They punished him because of me. Why are you tormenting me like this?”

 

Jae’s breath catches in his throat. Brian is not supposed to know about the punishment, Hyeji has promised. Ensuring that Brian won’t live in self-blame was one of the few things that made his departure easier. How doe he know? Who’s told him? Why is that everything he didn’t want to happen has happened? 

 

An endless list of what ifs fills his mind. If the Extreme Court didn’t reconsider his punishment, if they didn’t send him back to Brian, what would’ve happened to Brian? 

 

He carefully hold Brian’s hands and brings them closer to his face. “I’m here, Brian. I’m really here.” 

 

The other almost pulls his hands back, if not for Jae’s firm grasp on them. “I’m sorry for making you wait, but I’m back.” He kisses the back of each hand, letting his tears fall over them. “I’m sorry for making you suffer on your own.”

 

Brian shakes his head again, “I’m the one who made you suffer. I’m sorry.” He apologizes, weakly, “If I knew, I wouldn’t have confessed. I would’ve swallowed my feelings and let you be, but I was selfish-”

 

Jae puts a finger over his lips, preventing him from saying any additional word. “Never be sorry for what you did.” He firmly says. “Your love is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and your love is what has saved me.”

 

There’s uncertainty in Brian’s gaze. He stays still for a few seconds, contemplating the situation, before he asks, hesitant, “Are you-” he pauses, fear holding him back. He wets his lips before trying again, “Are you really back?”

 

Jae grins, then nods fervently, “I’m back. And I’m not leaving again, I promise.”

 

What he’s expected to make the other happy, only causes a dark shadow to take over Brian’s face, his hands tensing. “You promised, back then too,” he retreats his hands, placing them back in his lap. They curl into fists, “but it was a lie.”

 

His heart falls to the pit of his stomach, just like his smile. “I lied,” he confirms, voice laced with guilt. He doesn’t regret it though, because he’s done it to protect Brian from the pain, and he likes to believe that it did, even for a short time. 

 

“But this time, it’s the truth. This time, I’m really staying, and I’m never leaving your side again.” He promises, pouring all of his genuineness in that statement, hoping that Brian would believe him, at least this time. 

 

Brian’s eyes frantically search his face for any lie, any hint of insincerity. He takes more time than needed, but that’s understandable. This is too much to take in. Jae watches as he slowly, and steadily, processes the situation, then accepts it. Even in the darkness, he can see how Brian’s eyes regain their usual, lovely glint. His lips then stretches into a smile, that keeps widening and widening-

 

“Oomf!” Jae exclaims as he’s suddenly tackled to the ground in a desperate, tight hug. He hugs back with as much force, cradling Brian’s head in his chest. 

 

“I miss you so, so much,” he tells him, barely holding back from another tearful fit. 

 

“You said it, right! Don’t you dare ever leave my side, ever again!” Brian orders, playful, yet dead serious, “Even if they try to take you away from me, I won’t allow it. I’ll latch on you like this so they won’t have a choice but to take us both.” 

 

A laugh breaks out of Jae’s chest. It’s been so long since he’s laughed this feely and lightly. It’s been so long since he’s felt this alive. “I told you, they’ve only sent me back because of you.” 

 

Brian lifts his head to look at him, confused, “Because of me?”

 

Jae brushes the other’s bangs to the side as he nods. He then leans down to peck his lips, tenderly. “It turns out that you’re my soulmate. Can you believe it?” 

 

There’s a moment wherein Brian freezes, but then he chuckles in disbelief, “Soulmate? Are you serious?” 

 

Jae shrugs, “Well, that’s what they’ve said. And Ancient Cupids don’t lie.” He states, as a matter of fact.  

 

They share a silly look before they both burst into a fit of laughter, Brian’s whole body vibrating against his. 

 

“I don’t care how cheesy this is, as long as I get to love you without consequences, freely, that’s all I want,” Jae admits, once they’ve calmed down a little. 

 

The arms around his waist pulls him closer, as if there was any distance left between them to begin with. Gentle, Brian drops a small kiss on his forehead, then another on his nose. His grin melts into a fond, soft smile.

 

“Love of my life, my other half, or soulmate,” he says, voice low, as if he wants this moment to be shared between just him and Jae, “I don’t think that there would ever be a label that could rightfully measure how much I love you.”

 

And Jae melts right there and then. There’s just too many raw emotions conveyed in those words, expressed in those shining brown eyes with the same intensity. He feels like combusting with how much he’s feeling at the moment. Love, longing, freedom, warmth, euphoria, are just a few of the things filling his whole being. Just like Brian has said, words would never be enough to describe how he feels for the other, or around him. So he sticks to the classic way. 

 

“I love you,” he whispers against his lips, before he catches them in a proper, deep kiss. And even then, he can still feel Brian’s unwavering smile. It makes him smile as well. 

 

Their uncomfortable position on the floor prevents them from kissing for too long, so Brian stands up first, then helps Jae to get on his feet. That’s when Jae notices the chocolate cake, and he feels his mouth water. He’s about to bring up cutting the cake, when Brian suddenly exclaims, something at the side catching his attention.

 

“Oh!” He points at the window, “It’s snowing!” 

 

Before Jae could properly react, the other drags him to the balcony, running. They’re both underdressed for stepping outside in such weather, but neither of them seem care -at least for now, just give them a minute and they’ll run back inside freezing.

 

The snow is just like Jae has imagined it to be. It’s fluffy and cold, and melts instantly against the palm of his hand. The sight of it softly flying around is still as beautiful and magical, maybe even more now that he got to watch it with Brian wrapped around him.

 

That year, Jae got to witness the first snow with Brian. And it was a first of so many to come.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EPILOGUE

 

 

“Brian hyung! Thank God you’re here!” A desperate looking Dowoon calls for Brian as soon as he enters the bakery. The inside is filled to the brim with customers, and all the other staff are busy handling orders. 

 

The Cupid Bakery, something Hyeji has invested a lot of money in, and is fortunately, making a lot of money in return. It’s not usually this packed, but today marks the bakery’s second year anniversary, and the special products and discounts they’re offering are really hard to ignore, especially since they’re really popular for the deliciousness of their confections.

 

“Do you need help?” 

 

Brian has came right after work, ready to offer his help in case its needed. It obviously is. It’s usually just Dowoon, the bakery’s manager, at the cash register, while a part-timer handles the customers’ orders. Today, a lot of the Cupid Café’s employees are here to help. Wonpil is currently at the register instead of his boyfriend, while the latter is looking around frantically, studying the items in display, and giving orders here and there. Even Sungjin is here as well, Brian has just seen him rushing to the kitchen with an empty tray.

 

“Please!” Dowoon exclaims, after ordering for someone to get the chocolate cookies. He barely looks at Brian as he tells him, “Can you go check what’s delaying the red velvet cupcakes? Jae hyung said he’d finish decorating them in five, but that was fifteen minutes ago,” he sighs heavily, finally sparing him a glance, “Just make sure he’s not ruining them, will you?.”

 

Brian almost rolls his eyes at how dramatic Dowoon has sounded. What he’s meant by ‘ruin’, is just ‘being creative’ for Jae. Even Brian has to admit that some of Jae’s designs are unique, in a very objective, unbiased way. But again, his designs are what made the bakery stand out, in the first place. 

 

 

After officially becoming human, Jae has spent a lot of time at home dying with boredom, after failing at an awful lot of part time jobs. Some day, he’s decided to take his obsession with sweet confections to another level, and gave baking a shot. Surprisingly, he’s less of a hazard while managing dough and frosting, and after a lot of successful experiments in Brian’s kitchen, he’s decided to go professional. The lessons did pay off, and Hyeji has personally asked him to be Jaebum’s assistant for the new bakery. 

 

Well, it’s completely out of Brian’s understanding how those two have managed to work together in the same kitchen without one killing the other -obviously, it would be Jaebum killing Jae- but he’s glad that Jae is finally doing something that he enjoys and is good at. He’s very proud of his boyfriend, to say the least.

 

 

On his way to the kitchen, Brian comes across Jaebum, who looks like he’s just run a marathon with how much he’s sweating. He stops to look at Brian, then shakes his head, almost helpless, “Please do something about your boyfriend. He’s being weird again.” 

 

Brian braces himself for the worst, but what he finds is Jae sitting in his usual post, silently staring at the perfectly frosted cupcakes in front of him. He seems to be so deep in thoughts, totally mindless of the hustle happening around him.

 

“Jae babe,” he walks to him, trying to be as gentle as possible. His boyfriend turns around startled. He’s frowning but it quickly morphs into a mile. Brian kisses the crown of his head, “What are you doing?” 

 

Jae turns to the cupcakes with a sigh, “Don’t you think there’s something missing?” 

 

After studying them, Brian can’t think of anything wrong with them. Instead, he wonders how amidst all the mess, his boyfriend has managed to decorate them so beautifully. Different designs of flowers and roses, in both white and red frostings.  Those with simpler designs, have bits of the red velvet cake sprinkled over them, while others have heart shaped strawberries on top, or just white pearls. The whole batch together looks so elegant that it would be a crime to eat them.

 

“They’re perfect, believe me,” he reassures him, but Jae rolls his eyes, unconvinced.

 

“You say that about all the designs I come up with, even the ones that I, myself, found very questionable.”

 

Brian chuckles, amused, “Is that what I get for being supportive?” 

 

His boyfriend shakes his head with a smile, “No. You get to eat a lot of weird looking, but delicious stuff.”

 

He shrugs, “Well, I totally agree with the weird looking part.” 

 

Brian jumps back, barely dodging the attack that comes his way, as Jae grabs a rolling pin from the nearby counter and tries to smack him with it. 

 

“Just come take these out, before Dowoon fires me,” he puts the weapon away, then gestures for him to come closer, so he complies. Jae then plants a quick kiss to his cheek, “Thanks for the encouragement, and the help.” 

 

He grins at him, mischievously, “I’m not doing it for free, though.” 

 

The other scoffs, “Of course you’re not. I swear to God if it’s another wardrobe sacrifice-”

 

“Is this really the time to discuss that?” Sungjin interrupts their conversation, looking so done with them, like he always does. It must be Jaebum rubbing on him. 

 

“Bedrooms are there for a reason!” He snappily points out, making Brian flush in embarrassment. 

 

“That is not what this is about!” He tries to defend himself, looking helplessly at Jae for help. The traitor, however, has already moved to check on the ovens, leaving him to get scolded all by himself. 

 

Sungjin just rolls his eyes, “I don’t care! Get your moving, people are waiting for those cupcakes!” He orders, as if he’s the boss. 

 

Dejected, Brian lifts the tray and walks outside, mumbling, “you don’t even work there,” for Sungjin to hear him. 

 

 

 

 

Hopefully, the busy day soon comes to an end, with everything holding out. Last year, they had a chance to celebrate by themselves after closing time, but this year, it’s unlikely to happen. They’re all too exhausted to consider anything apart from going home and resting. Jae, in particular, has been in a worse state than all of them. 

 

“Here, drink this,” Brian hands him the very familiar pill and a glass of water. His lover glares at the meds for a few seconds, but still takes it and swallows it with a disgusted grimace. 

 

“Ugh I hate this!” He complains, slipping further under the covers. 

 

Brian was not going to let him go to sleep that easily. He gives him a scrutinizing look, “Just admit it, how much sweets did you eat these last two days?” 

 

Jae’s eyes widen like a dear caught in headlights. He then grins sheepishly, “Only a little bit more than usual?” 

 

Brian is truthfully happy that Jae is doing something that he likes, but he would’ve loved it more if it came with less sugar. While Jaebum and Dowoon have been doing a great job at preventing him from just eating everything is display, they can’t babysit him all the time, and Jae’s weakness for freshly baked goods and anything with chocolate always end up winning. Brian is then left to take care of a whining Jae. 

 

He groans, “That’s it! I’m taking you to the dentist tomorrow!” 

 

Jae nothing but panic at the threat. Dentists have to be his most resentful enemies in this world, just after spicy food, and what a questionable ranking that is.  

 

“No no no! I’m truly fine. This pain is nothing, really.”

 

He tries to fool him, but Brian can already see the beginning of a swollen cheek. Hopefully, the painkiller will be enough for tonight. Otherwise, another trip to the emergency room will be needed. Last time this has happened, it was because of a stupid purchase Jae has made online. A small chocolate fountain. Who on earth buys a chocolate fountain just for their own use? To say that Brian was surprised when he came back to find the item sitting gracefully on their kitchen counter would be an understatement. 

 

It’s at days like those that he most appreciates his nine-to-five job. It has been the only constant and boring thing in his life, ever since Jae has barged into it. It kind of balances the rollercoaster his days has became because of his lover. Who said that turning into a plain human would make Jae less unpredictable? He’ll certainly never cease to surprise Brian. 

 

Anyways, Jae has promised to use the chocolate fountain moderately, but ‘moderately’ according to his standards was still too excessive, and one day, he has ended up with an unbearable toothache at an ungodly early hour. Their trip to the emergency room was a nightmare, to say the least, and Brian has gotten rid of the chocolate fountain as soon as they came back. Jae has been banned form online shopping ever since.  

 

 

“Sleep for now, and we’ll see in the morning,” Brian sternly orders, slipping in bed after turning off the lights.

 

Jae automatically shifts closer to him, rapping his arms around his torso. He’s currently pouting, but Brian has gotten better at resisting it. Just a little bit.

 

“Okay,” his lover gives in for now, voice already heavy with tiredness and sleep. Brian knows that there’s going to be a big fuss about it in the morning, but he’ll worry about it then, him too getting pulled in by sleep. 

 

Jae mumbles something against his chest, sounding very similar to a “Good night”. In return, Brian throws his arm around his lover, kissing the top of his head, “Good night to you too, sunshine.”

 

 

Brian no longer fears going to sleep, and Jae no longer fears the days passing by. Instead, they’ve both been enjoying every single day to the fullest, and when nighttime comes, they bid it goodbye, ready to greet another morning with content smiles and open hearts. Now that they have each other, they’ve stopped worrying about the past flying by, or about the pending future. They have no idea when the end will be, but they’ve long learned to live in and appreciate their present.  

 

For them, life is no longer a dreadful countdown, but a book waiting to be filled with memories of them, till the last page. 

 

-THE END-

---

 

The last sentence took me 30 minutes to write, believe it or not >w<
I know I with endings but I hope this was not too awful? I really, really tried!! (and i was really tempted to make it a sad ending, but then decided that you guys deserve better *___* )

Anyways, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT OFFICIALLY ENDED!!! A journey of 6 months finally came to an end and it's all thanks to you guys that I was able to continue with it and finish it TTT__TTT
A BIG THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU GUYS!!! thank you for being patient with me and staying around till the very end. Your support has really encouraged me to keep going and it means A LOT for me! you guys are truly the best <3 <3 <3

Your feedbacks, criticism, and questions are all welcomed here, or on my twitter. you can rant as much as you want ;D

Again, I'm really grateful to all of you, and I wish you all the best in your lives. Wherever you are, be happy, be healthy, and be Safe. <3 <3