Chapter 8: Taking a Step Back

Without You, I'm Nothing [Will Discontinue]

General POV

Lisa was a wreck the next few days after her conversation with Rosé. She felt as if the world came tumbling down on her again and there was no way to get back up on her feet. Jennie noticed the change as well and even though she knows Lisa was not okay, it didn't stop her from pursuing her. They travelled from Paris to London then Madrid, Auckland finally to Sydney. The tour was a success but Lisa never felt like celebrating at all even on their last day. The crew was at a bar in Sydney and while the others were having fun, Lisa sat there in the corner of their VIP table. Jennie took notice of this so she approached her.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Jennie said as she sat down beside Lisa but she just looked away. "Hey, cheer up already. This is our last day together and tomorrow we'll be back in Seoul and you'll be able to see Rosé again"

"If she still wants to see me" Lisa answered.

"Look, I was your friend as well, I mean, at least I think I am but everything will be okay. It may take some time for this to be fixed but it will. I am sure your time apart will help you both grow. And when we get back, talk to her. She may refuse to do so but I know how persistent you can be. I mean, c'mon I was your girlfriend once upon a time, so I have an idea. I'm not going to wash my hands because I was also involved in this mess but I know she's the one for you Lisa. Fight for her no matter what." After Jennie said that, she squeezed Lisa’s hand then stood up and joined her crew on the dance floor. It was a lot for Lisa to take in everything that's happening but hearing those words from Jennie gave her the idea on what she needs to do. She will do everything to get her Rosé back.

On the flight back, Lisa chose to sit at the very back seat on the private jet and rehearsed what she wants to say to Rosé. Once she was sure that she got everything under control, she decided to sleep for the remainder of their flight. A few hours later, they arrived at Incheon International Airport and they started to alight from the plane. She was kind of expecting Rosé to greet her but she was instead greeted by her father.

"Dad, what are you doing here? Where's Rosé?" Lisa said as she hugged her father. Mr. Manoban just smiled then took her bags and put it inside the car.

"Let's take you home, kiddo"

They went inside the car and drove away from the airport. Her father was quiet the whole time so Lisa became suspicious. "I missed you dad."

"I missed you too kid." Mr. Manoban answered without taking his eyes off the road.

"But seriously, why are you so quiet?"

Her father sighed heavily but remained quiet. When they arrived at her apartment, her father stepped out of the car right away and took her bags. Lisa followed her then went inside.

"Thanks for driving me home dad. But please, tell me what's going on?" Lisa was becoming nervous now.

Her father led her to the living room. "You may have to sit down for this" So she did.

"A week after you went to Paris, we received an email containing some photos. I couldn't believe it at first but seeing Rosé the next day at the office confirmed me that it was definitely real." Her father started. "She wasn't her usual self because Rosé wasn't someone who would be rude to any of her co- workers, that's normally you, but the very next day, some of your team filed a complaint about her. So I talked to her and she did tell me what happened when you two talked."

Lisa was trying not to cry because she knows the gravity of what she did.

"So, where is she dad?" she asked.

Her father took a deep breathe then said, "She hasn't been going to work after we talked and no one has been able to contact her, not even your friends Wendy and Irene"

"What do you mean?"

"She's missing Lisa"

Lisa was already bawling at this point. "W-what do you mean s-she's missing? Have you tried her apartment? Maybe her phone died or something. "

Her father hugged her daughter then said, "We already did that kid, but she's not at her apartment. Your college buddies also helped looking for her but there was no sign of her anywhere. We went to all the police station in town and already filed her as a missing person. We even checked if she went out of the country but even in the airport records, her name didn't pop up"

"I'm sorry Lisa. We won't stop looking for her, okay. That's a promise. Rosé is also like a daughter to me. "

Her father stayed beside her until she fell asleep so he lifted her and brought her to her room. He also called Wendy and Irene to stay with her daughter as he goes back home to check for any updates regarding Rosé.

The next day, Lisa was surprised to see she was in her own room because the last thing she remember is being brought home by her dad. She heard someone singing downstairs so once she was done washing up, she went down and found Wendy watching Irene singing while cooking breakfast.

"What are you two doing here?" Lisa greeted.

Wendy ran to Lisa and hugged her. "We missed you Lisa. Irene is almost done so please take a seat."

Once Irene was finished, they started eating breakfast. And for a moment, everything was going well, until Lisa noticed the chair at the other side of the table, where Rosé used to sit and started crying.

"This is all my fault! If anything happens to her, I won't be able to forgive myself"

Wendy and Irene were beside her in seconds. "Oh honey, please don't blame yourself. Chaeng is smart and I'm sure she wouldn't do anything to hurt herself. She just needs time."

"Yeah. Wannie’s right. I'm sure that when she comes back, everything will be alright" Irene added.

Lisa sniffed and tried to calm down, "What if it doesn't?"

Both her friends kept quiet because anything they say at this point would not have an effect to Lisa. They just tried their best to comfort their friend the best way they can.

Rosé's POV

Two weeks passed by and I know Lisa’s already back home but as much as I want to go back to her, I decided not to. I know they've all been looking for me but I can't seem to face them all, not right now though. When I go back, I want to make sure I am all better. I chose the option of not caring about anyone at the moment so here I am staying somewhere in the Cayman Islands, in a property my parents bought which Lisa has never been too as well. I used to go here when I was younger because the place is so calm and just watching the ocean relaxes me. I opened my phone for the first time in two weeks and was bombarded with text and voice messages. I opened the recent messages which are mostly from Mr. Manoban, my friends and of course Lisa. I stared at her name and remembered the last time we talked. It didn't end well and worst of all is I broke up with her. I really didn't want to but she really hurt me big time. I love her but right now I just want to be by myself. I started reading some of the messages and it made me miss them.

From Lisa: baby, I really am sorry for what happened. I didn't mean to hurt you. I wish I could hold you right now.

From Lisa: baby, why can't I contact you? Please, I want to talk you. When you get this, please call me back.

From Mr. Manoban: Chaeng, I understand that you are going through an emotional phase right now; I just want you to know that we are here for you. I did file your leave of absence and whenever you are ready to come back, you still have your place here in the company.

From Wendy: Hey Chaeyoung, I just heard what happened. Wherever you right now, I hope you are safe. Anyway, come back home when you're ready. I'm not proposing to Irene if you're not here.

After reading and listening all the messages, I suddenly felt the urge to go back home but the question is, am I ready now to face her?

Night time came and as I was preparing my dinner, my phone rang and it was Lisa. I didn't mind it at first but when she kept calling me, I almost hit the answer button so I just switched it off. I will talk to her when I get back, however, when - I still don't know, I miss her though. I plan to stay here for a few more days then go back to the real world. I guess three weeks is enough to clear my head and Mr. Manoban was so kind to file my leave despite just disappearing. I wasn't thinking straight when I left so everything was done in a rush. After eating my dinner, I went out of the porch, lit a cigarette and waited until the words flowed out of my mind then wrote it down. I've been meaning to write a songs since I haven't done that in a while.

You and I, we're like fireworks and symphonies exploding in the sky
With you, I'm alive
Like all the missing pieces of my heart, they finally collide

So stop time right here in the moonlight
'Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes

Without you, I feel broke
Like I'm half of a whole
Without you, I've got no hand to hold
Without you, I feel torn
Like a sail in a storm
Without you, I'm just a sad song
I'm just a sad song

With you, I fall
It's like I'm leaving all my past and silhouettes up on the wall
With you, I'm a beautiful mess
It's like we're standing hand and hand with all our fears up on the edge

So stop time right here in the moonlight
'Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes

Without you, I feel broke
Like I'm half of a whole
Without you, I've got no hand to hold
Without you, I feel torn
Like a sail in a storm
Without you, I'm just a sad song

You're the perfect melody
The only harmony I wanna hear
You're my favourite part of me
With you standing next to me
I've got nothing to fear

Without you, I feel broke
Like I'm half of a whole
Without you, I've got no hand to hold
Without you, I feel torn
Like a sail in a storm
Without you, I'm just a sad song

Without you, I feel broke
Like I'm half of a whole
Without you, I've got no hand to hold
Without you, I feel torn
Like a sail in a storm
Without you, I'm just a sad song, I'm just a sad song

After finishing the lyrics, I got my guitar and put some melody into it. Once satisfied, I packed up everything and went to bed.

General POV

Lisa went back to work the next day and tried not to dwell on the current situation with Rosé. She remained professional as much as she can be but there are still times she catches herself staring at nothing or just simply zoning out. Wendy and Irene invited her for lunch so as soon as she finished her meetings that morning, she met the couple at their favorite restaurant. Lisa was the first to arrive and she sat at their usual table and checked the menu. She already knows what they would get so when the waiter came back, she gave him the orders. A few minutes later, Wendy and Irene arrived and they took their usual chairs across Lisa. Rosé was never mentioned as her friends know it would affect Lisa so they tried to pry away from the topic as much as possible. When lunch time was over, they went back to work. The day went on and before Lisa knows it, it was already the end of their work. It turned out to be a light day after all with just a few meetings which she took care of that morning and just some finishing touches on a few songs they were working on. She would stay behind the office and go inside one of the studios to playback all the songs they made that day or to take turns and record one of their songs but normally she does that with Rosé so since she wasn't here, she went home right away.

Now that she's back at her apartment, she felt more alone and that's when she broke down again with the fact that Rosé is still missing and there are no updates from her. She tried her luck and checked if she would her call would be able to go through. She dialed the familiar number and expected the worst... but then it rang.

"C'mon Chaeng, please pick up" Lisa thought to herself. After several attempts, the line couldn't be reached again. She had her hopes up for a while there but then she just thought, at least I know Rosé is fine, she just needed her space. And she was willing to give it to her.

Somewhere in the Cayman Islands, Rosé was on her bed trying to sleep. She kept thinking on how she would face Lisa when she gets back. All she wanted her to do was to be honest with her but even that she couldn't even do and that is what's pissing her off even more. However, she doesn't want to lose Lisa as well. She loves her too much if that's even possible. She may have had her own shares of hook ups back then but she's always been in love with her best friend. And no matter what happens she will always be in love with her. It didn't matter how long it took for them to have the courage to tell each other how they felt, what's important is they did and it was worth the wait. She looked back on everything they've been through and thought, that they've definitely come a long way together and she won't let it go to waste. So with that thought, she went to sleep and planned to surprise everyone by flying back instead of her original plan of staying for a few more days.

When she woke up the next day, as she prepared her breakfast, she also booked a flight back to Seoul. She picked the earliest flight so she can go to Lisa’s apartment and surprise her there. Once her things were packed, she went to the souvenir shop and bought a few things for her friends then drove the car back to the rental place and walked two blocks going to the airport. Once her flight is called, she went to the gate and boarded the plane. Five hours later, they landed at IIA.

Rosé's POV

Upon checking out of the airport, I hailed a cab and went back to my apartment. Everything was just how I left it. I mean, I would be scared if it weren't. I unloaded my bag and fixed myself for what I plan to do later at Lisa’s apartment. I still need to buy a few more things so I went out of the house but I put on a disguise to prevent anyone recognizing me and letting Lisa know that I'm back which would ruin the surprise. I was done shopping by the time I heard my tummy making noises so since I was already near our favorite restaurant, I went inside. I sat on one of the chairs at the back then gave my order to the waitress. She stayed for a few seconds just staring at me before she went back inside the kitchen. While waiting for my food, I saw the door open and heard familiar voices. I got my mirror and checked them out; she was having lunch with Wendy. She wasn't expecting them at all but it was a good thing she didn't take their usual table otherwise, Lisa would recognize her in a heartbeat even with her disguise. Good thing she decided to sit with her back on them but close enough to hear whatever they're talking about. I can hear Lisa talking about the office then transitioned to what happened on the tour and that's when I listened very closely.

"We were on our way to this bar in Paris with a few friends I didn't really want to but you know how these celebrities are." Wendy nodded in agreement. She has worked with celebrities as well as she is becoming a well-known photographer. "So they already started drinking on our way there and of course I didn’t want to be a party pooper, I took some shots as well. When we got inside the bar, the shots continued and you know me with alcohol - I couldn't stop myself. Then since I was already comfortable with her and with alcohol in my system, I was no longer in control of my actions. We were all dancing and next thing I know, her lips were against mine and if Tae-yeon wasn't there to give us a heads up about the papz, we wouldn't have stopped. The moment we broke apart brought me to my senses. So I tried to stay away from her after that however, when we got back to our hotel and I have sobered up, I was pulled back into her world. I don't know why but it was like one of those times when we were still together."

"Wow. I'm your friend Lisa, but I definitely understand why Chaeng’s gone. That's a very low blow.Wendy responded. I knew she would say that because that's how straightforward she is. "So, this may sound stupid or what but what I want to know is, do you still have feelings for your ex?"

She didn’t answer right away. Why didn’t she answer Wendy’s question?

Wendy spoke again. "Well?"

I hear Lisa clear her throat then answered, "No. I don't have feelings for her anymore. I love Rosé and she's the one for me. I just wish she's back, you know? I really miss her"

"I know. We miss her too and I'm sure you're the one for her as well. I mean, she wouldn't have waited for you all these years if you weren't. So anyway, I need some help with my proposal. How do you think I should do it?" Wendy replied.

"I think it's best if you ask Chaeng about this. She's better with planning than I am" Lisa then answered which is really true.

"Oh my! Is that the time? ! I have to get back to the studio. I have a meeting at one thirty" Wendy suddenly exclaimed and I hear Lisa said she has to go as well.

So with that, we they for the food then left the restaurant. Once they were at the door, using only my peripheral vision, I saw Lisa looking back so I made to look at the wall instead.

General POV

Once Lisa and Wendy left, Rosé waited for a few more minutes then left the booth. She made sure that the coast was clear before walking out of the street going to her car. Since she already bought everything she needs for her surprise she went straight to Lisa’s apartment. Lisa had changed her locks so Rosé would have access so once she was inside, she took the liberty of fixing the house as Lisa tends to forget to do so. After cleaning up, she started preparing for dinner. She enjoyed cooking too much that she only had an hour left before Lisa would arrive home. So once the table was set, she ran up to the room for a quick shower.

At half past seven, Rosé was already dressed up and waiting for Lisa’s terrace where she has her surprise. A few more minutes, she heard the door unlock. Little did Lisa know she set up some cameras to capture every moment.

"What is this?" She heard Lisa as she saw the petals scattered on the floor She followed the petals then stopped when she saw a note by the couch.

Tell me that you want me
And I'll be yours completely
For better or for worse

She continued following the petals and stopped as yet another note was hanging, this time by the piano.

I know
We'll have our disagreements
Be fighting for no reason
I wouldn't change it for the world

Then another was hanging by the dinner table.

'Cause I know
The first day that I met you
I was never gonna let you
Let you slip away

And another one by the closed door leading to her terrace.

And I
Still remember feeling nervous
Trying to find the words to
Get you here today

As she opened the door, there she saw Rosé standing by the table set for two holding a bouquet of sunflowers. She can hear a song playing in the background and only realized that the notes had the lyrics of it. Rosé started walking towards as she started crying. Rosé gave the flowers and Lisa gladly accepted it. Then Rosé held Lisa in her arms.

"Baby please stop crying" Rosé said as she patted her back but she just cried even more. "I'm here now Lisa"

It took a few more minutes before Lisa calmed down and when she did, she kissed Rosé like her life depended on it and of course she kissed back. When things were starting to get a little hot, Rosé pulled away.

"We can have more of that later but first, let us enjoy the dinner I have prepared for us" Rosé said while leading Lisa to her chair, pulling it just like the gentlewoman that she is. She poured some wine on their glasses then sat down.

Lisa wiped her eyes then she finally started talking. "Where were you Chaeng? I mean, I was worried about you. We were all worried about you"

"I didn't mean to make you all worry, it's just that, I needed to be alone at that time. But, if this isn't proof enough, I have already forgiven you Lisa. You hurt me bad but I'd rather not lose you completely. You're my person Lisa and I wouldn't have it any other way"

She was speechless once again so Rosé was contemplating whether to give her second surprise. She was about to stand up when Lisa started to speak.

"What did I do to deserve you Chaeng? I messed up but you're here like nothing happened. I mean, how you can be so perfect"

"I'm way far from perfect babe. I have my own flaws but like I said, despite what happened, I'd rather not lose you. I can't even imagine my life without you. What I want though, is for you to be honest with me and I'm going to be honest with you too. Are you 100% with me? Cause you know I am"

Lisa didn't waste any second and answered her, "Yes! I am 100% with you Park Chaeyoung!"

With that, they continued eating and as the night went by, they cleaned up what they used and prepared for bed. It was a Friday night so they had the whole weekend to themselves. After they shared a shower, Rosé told Lisa to wait for her inside the room as she checked if the doors are locked but she actually went to get her second surprise. Once she has it in her hands, she went up to see her girlfriend waiting for her.

"Hey babe?"

"Yes?" Lisa responded as she faced Rose’.

"Uhmm.. I've been wanting do this…well… not exactly this" Rosé started. Lisa sat up as she sensed something was up.

"What is it babe?"

"I planned to do this earlier but I was still contemplating on doing it, however, I thought if I don't, I might lose the chance"

"You're making me nervous babe"

Rosé got down on one knee and held her girlfriend's hand.

"In this lifetime or the next, know that I will always be with you no matter what. We may not agree on all things but know that our differences are what makes us compatible with each other. In a world where people don't believe in soul mates anymore, I'm one of the few who still does. And I know that fate has laid a hand when we met that day in junior high. I fell in love with the devil, so they say, but I didn't really care. I promise that I will never leave you from this day forward and that my love for you will be as strong as it ever was" Rosé said then got the promise ring from her pocket and placed it on Lisa’s hand. "I'm giving you this ring as a promise that I will be yours no matter what"

Lisa was already crying as Rosé finished her speech. She wasn't expecting this at all. She looked at her girlfriend and answered, "I accept this ring and promise to be yours no matter what"

Rosé took off the ring from the box and placed it on Lisa’s finger then kissed her. They ended the night making love and it was one of the best feelings ever.

 

 

 

 

A/N - Songs Used:

Sad Song by We the Kings

The One by Kodaline

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existslikePristin
#1
Chapter 12: Hey, sorry to hear about the writer's block. I'm a little bummed out I didn't find this earlier, because this is pretty good so far!
I hope you get all cleared up!