Baekhyun did not discover about what happened to Kyungsoo until he returned from his family vacation in late February, a week before the start of the spring semester.

Even so, Kyungsoo kept mum about the whole situation and it took more prying on Baekhyun’s behalf to finally get him to talk.

Kyungsoo could tell Baekhyun was disappointed in him, judging by the look on his face when Kyungsoo finally broke the news of what he had done and what had happened after.

Baekhyun didn’t scold Kyungsoo though. He was patient and avoided talking about the whole suspension and Chanyeol altogether. Instead, he focused more on Kyungsoo himself and how to move forward from this predicament.

Kyungsoo continued going to his job even though he had no classes and was put on hold from his studies. Kyungsoo started to envision himself possibly working at that family restaurant for a long time and even heavily considering the idea of applying to become a full-time staff, should he never be able to return to university. Maybe, he could eventually become the store manager one day, Kyungsoo thought. This waiter job was all he had now, possibly.

It was a complete shift from the future Kyungsoo came from but he learned that he had to accept that things weren’t going to be the same anymore.

Perhaps, he might even meet someone else and start a family with a person that wasn’t Chanyeol. There were, after all, literally billions of other people he could go for.

Kyungsoo reckoned he could learn to love with someone else and be maybe be equally as happy like he used to be.

Maybe he was really sent into the past to lead a different life for some reason. It didn’t mean that he had to be sad and miserable while he was here though.

Giving up on Chanyeol was one of the hardest things he ended up doing. But it was not yet defeat, because Kyungsoo was choosing himself above everything else. Kyungsoo had even cut the picture of Chanyeol he used to bring to sleep with, in an effort to slowly forget Chanyeol.

There was no use beating himself up over someone who probably wouldn’t even spare him a second thought.

Now that Kyungsoo was barred from being on campus, Baekhyun made more efforts to meet Kyungsoo at home or at his workplace, since Baekhyun was the only one of the two who still had a car and a valid driving license.

Kyungsoo never replaced the car he lost in the accident and never appealed to have his driver’s license suspension to be repealed too. He would only do it several years later after he had children in a different future.

Kyungsoo’s daily routine when he wasn’t working was sleeping at almost dawn and waking up at noon. He would then spend most of his day still in his pajamas and still in bed, playing games or watching videos on his phone. He was mostly unfunctional outside of work.

During the time, Kyungsoo’s diet involved mostly of bottled water, junk food, and instant ramen. Occasionally, he’d have fast food delivered to the house and instruct the delivery person to leave it at the gate so he didn’t have to interact with anyone.

Sometimes, late at night when everyone was asleep, Kyungsoo would leave the house and walk to the nearest convenience store to buy a bottle of soju. He would drink it back on the walk home and finish it by then, so he wouldn’t worry his father who would see the bottle in the trash later on.

Since he had run out of sleeping pills and could no longer fill up the prescription for it, Kyungsoo had turned to alcohol to help him sleep at night and not have nightmares about the life he lost.

Kyungsoo hadn’t touched a single book or any academic materials for that matter since his suspension. Kyungsoo didn’t need to anyway. He already knew all the information he needed. He only needed to disassociate and distract himself away from his problems now.

In fact, Kyungsoo had also braced himself with the possibility that all this studying might be useless, should he seriously pursue a different career and aspire to be a restaurant manager. He did download an online book about restaurant management but he had yet to even read it, constantly procrastinating even on something he thought he wanted.

One weekday evening after class, Baekhyun came over to keep Kyungsoo company while his father was busy on a roadshow tour to promote the newest sedan car of the company he worked for.

Kyungsoo’s father would be away for another week so Baekhyun decided to come over more often in the meantime. Simply put, Baekhyun worried at what Kyungsoo would do if he were to leave the latter alone.

Baekhyun bought a takeaway dinner for himself and Kyungsoo. After they ate, Baekhyun hung out in the living room with Kyungsoo. The television was to the daily national news but neither of them was really watching it.

Kyungsoo was playing a game on his phone and Baekhyun was sitting on the couch, darting his attention back and forth from Kyungsoo and the television. Baekhyun felt that he desperately needed to address the situation at hand.

“So, what did you do today?” Baekhyun made small talk.

“I just watched some anime and played games,” Kyungsoo answered, not even looking up from his phone.

“You have work tomorrow, don’t you?” Baekhyun continued.

“Yeah, I work the afternoon to closing shift tomorrow,” Kyungsoo explained, unbudging.

“Anything else? Do you have any other different plans?” Baekhyun sounded a bit stern now, as he folded his arms over his chest, side-eyeing Kyungsoo sitting next to him on the couch.

“Nah,” Kyungsoo simply replied.

“You know there’s more to life than your three days a week job, anime, and playing games. How long are you going to keep living like this?,”  Baekhyun asserted.

Feeling a tense situation arising, Kyungsoo froze in panic at a possible confrontation, judging by Baekhyun’s displeased tone. Kyungsoo put his phone down on his lap and his body tensed up, even if he tried to hide that happening from view.

He was beginning to feel tingles in his fingers, his chest constricting and his heartbeat, racing. All of it the classic signs of a panic attack or maybe his failing health condition.

Kyungsoo knew he was at fault but he didn’t want to be scolded or accused anymore. Every door he opened led him to rejection and disapproval.

He understood how his behavior would fed up other people. But he just wanted one piece of good news in his life and something stable to hold onto.

But at that moment, his thoughts began to race. He started thinking about how he hadn’t been a good friend to Baekhyun in return, how he took Baekhyun for granted and how Baekhyun realized that he was done with Kyungsoo now.

Kyungsoo knew he was difficult but he couldn’t help it. It wasn’t as if he didn’t try to make things right. He did and he failed miserably. He was drowning in a sea and now the last driftwood he could onto for his life was slipping away. Kyungsoo didn't ask to be difficult. 

Kyungsoo croaked, attempting to please Baekhyun, “Well…I’m thinking of working full time soon. I was already planning to ask my manager to promote me to a full-time waiter. I’m trying, Baekhyun.”

“-and then what?” Baekhyun still seemed displeased, “Are you still going to live like this? Stuck in your room and sulking all day while running away from your problems and letting them get even worse? You never listen to anyone but yourself. Now, look at where you’re at now.”

“I will deal with it eventually…I promise,” Kyungsoo talked slowly, unable to look at Baekhyun in the eye even though they were sitting right next to each other, “Baek, I’m really sorry.”

Baekhyun sighed, “You really make it hard for people to even want to try and be friends with you.”

“Are you going to leave me now?” Kyungsoo asked, delirious at the possibility that he was also going to lose his best friend now.

“Not really,” Baekhyun answered, unsure himself, “But I think I need some time away from you. I can’t help you if you don’t help yourself, Kyungsoo.”

“Oh,” Kyungsoo’s heart sank to the pits