Donghae looked at the beach that seems begging for him to come and play with the water or even dip himself in the blue. Oh, Donghae wonders how it would feel like since the thought itself is so tempting.

The sun shines so warm that morning and their surrounding isn’t really crowded. Donghae waits patiently for Hyukjae comes to his side, helping him to walk to the beachside.

35 weeks and five days.

If everyone will shock and amazed by how big his tummy is, then Donghae would say how the babies also heavy and loves to kick especially when someone talks with them and by now, Donghae growing a new like to a vegetable and fruit which is totally a good thing. Since he can’t drink a lot of coffee, he will make smoothie or eat fruits instead when he has free time, sometimes also search for a good recipes.

And yes, they finally go to the beach after Hyukjae has a lot of work before which needed him to go abroad for several times.

Donghae will describe their relationship as not really good which means still awkward, quiet, and only talk when it is related to babies. It feels like they’re two strangers but in the same moment it’s also not like that since Donghae still remembers every detail of Hyukjae’s habits, what he likes or dislikes, what he loves and not.

It’s been weeks since that day and Donghae finally succeed to get rid of the bad thought about Hyukjae and Henry. He doesn’t want to think about them again no matter how much he wants to know the truth.

Hyukjae holds his hand and shoulder, lead him to walk carefully approaching their place. He smiles when Hyukjae opened the wide cloth for them to sit and sets all the things he brings. Donghae keeps quiet when Hyukjae placing the basket filled with their food on the middle and after that taking out his laptop from his backpack.

Donghae moves his eyes to the beach. The air still a bit cold so he choose to sit and letting the sun to bath his body. Giving a warm feeling to his body and heart.

Weeks by weeks until months by months keep changing. Donghae still accepting projects but he tried to reduce it since it’s getting hard for him to move around. He even barely cooking by himself since it’s so tiringful for him, including their food today which Hyukjae ordered from the famous restaurant this morning.

When his pregnancy reached 32 weeks, his mom finally comes and stay for a few days with him. It’s not easy for her to see his condition. Mrs Lee would smile and laugh everytime the babies moved or kicked but deep inside her heart, she feels broken when his son has to live like that, leaving by Hyukjae and will have divorce soon. She kept smiling when Donghae and Hyukjae had video call (sometimes she would talk to Hyukjae too) but Donghae could see the sadness lingering in her eyes.

It’s not a secret that his mom loves Hyukjae and treats him like her own son. She couldn’t mad at Hyukjae even at that time when she knew Hyukjae is the one who wants to divorce. His mom won’t be mad to Hyukjae but she regrets what he has done.

Hyukjae and his mom might talk like usual but at the same moment, it looked awkward too. No longer question about both of their relationship, only about work and babies. It feels foreign.

Although Donghae keeps saying he’s okay when his mom asking about his condition, Mrs Lee knowing her son more than anyone. The happiness is not the same anymore. Eventhough the woman excited to meet her grandchilds soon but losing Hyukjae as her son-in-law hits her hard.

Hyukjae who brought a gift for her when they came for the first time to Mokpo and everytime when they met. Hyukjae who asked for her blessing to their relationship, who made a funny jokes when they cooked together on the Christmas eve, surprising Donghwa’s birthday together, and kissed her cheeks everytime they come and was about to leave.

Although their relationship with Hyukjae’s family is still fine, it’s not the same anymore. It’s not only Donghae who feels so sad about this.

Hyukjae’s family still coming every here and then to visit Donghae and supporting him. They’ll bring him to walk around the apartment, shopping together, or simply talking about each other and Hyukjae still stay over for a few times in a week when he has no schedules and sometimes he also accompany Donghae to check on their babies.

Since it’s getting hard for Donghae to walk, Hyukjae also bought him a wheel chair because the doctor had warned him that it would be dangerous if Donghae walking too long. Indeed, having twin babies aren’t easy.

Donghae stares at Hyukjae secretly and sighs when he caught the other man is busy with his laptop. What can he wish? Hyukjae accompanies him to the beach only to fulfill his promise weeks ago.

But still…

Donghae rubs his tummy and smiling when the babies kick. The due date is just a few weeks more but Donghae feels so nervous mixed with excited. Although Ryeowook, Jongwoon, his brother, his mom, Hyukjae’s family, and Kyuhyun have told him everything will be fine, he can’t keep calm.

Of course, he wants to see the babies and kiss them but in the same time, he is not ready to accept the fact Hyukjae will divorce him afterwards. It’s still hurt him whenever he has to stand with the truth they’re nothing.

Those attention and touches are nothing.

Donghae shifts his head to take a look at their surrounding. There are a family who laughing because of their child’s funny expression. They looked so happy and for some reason, Donghae wants to feel that kind of happiness too.

There are times where he stands by his mirror, staring at his own features and asking himself if he is not attractive anymore. Asking if Henry is indeed more capable than him in everything. Asking if that’s why Hyukjae wants to leave him. Leaving their love behind.

Donghae glances at Hyukjae who is now frowning with his eyes fixed on his laptop, like he is reading or thinking of what he will do to the next step. But it’s not related to their marriage.

Just a few days more he can keep their status as husbands. Just a few days more…

“Hyukjae.” When the man shifts his gaze to him, Donghae smiles sheepishly. He doesn’t know how he will endure his sadness when the court reveals their new status. Donghae doesn’t know what kind of expression he should show that time. Realising Hyukjae’s confused expression, he muttered, “I think the babies kick me because they’re hungry.”

Hyukjae chuckles and nodding in understatement. He stretched his hand to take the basket, open it, and let Donghae to choose what he wants to eat. When tamago sando is chosen, Donghae closed back the basket.

Hyukjae doesn’t notice how Donghae’s eyes turned when he placing his hand on his tummy. He doesn’t realise how Donghae holding himself from shaking and prevent himself from crying when he kissed the tummy.

Donghae will remember this day and other days when they’re together. He will cherish every moment of them together with their babies eventhough they’re not together later. He will miss this kind of moment everyday.

When we were us.

Donghae won’t able to call him with endearing nicknames any longer. He can’t ask for cuddle or kiss. Not even a single touch on his hand anymore.

Can you stay the same, Hyukjae?

Can I stay in your arms as what we used to do before?

Donghae raised his head to look at the beautiful sky above them.

Hyukjae is like a moon. He only can see but can’t touch him anymore. They’re so close yet so far.

.

.

.

If a few weeks backwards he still can walk to Ryeowook’s apartment freely and giving his cookies to Kyuhyun, or walking to the market nearby, then he can’t do it now and letting himself being pampered by people around him. All of them (Ryeowook, Jongwoon, and Kyuhyun) have to come to his apartment because of his tummy getting bigger and helps him to do grocery shopping eventhough he has said he can order by online.

Just like today, Kyuhyun arranged all the vegetables in the fridge and approaching Donghae who is writing the list of what he will cook (at least he can still cook one or two food) for a week.

“You don’t have to force yourself.” Kyuhyun pulls the chair and sit across from Donghae who is giggling. “I can help you to cook. Maybe the taste is not as good as yours but at least you can relax.”

“That’s the problem!” Donghae exclaimed, his lips twitching from holding his laughter when Kyuhyun groans. “My babies are picky and clever. They can’t tolerate your mistakes.” Kyuhyun ruffled his own hair when Donghae laughed and reminds him of what he had done when he wanted to cook for Donghae.

Once upon a time, Donghae requested for kimchi fried rice which was actually very simple but Kyuhyun adding too much salt. In result, Donghae couldn’t finish his food and ended up mocking him and cook by himself, ignoring Kyuhyun who asked him to sit and offered to make a new one.

Not only that, Donghae even told Ryeowook and Jongwoon as if it’s not enough to make the younger embarrassed. But Kyuhyun is not mad, he is happy as long as the pregnant male can laugh heartily.

“I can’t wait to carry your babies. They must be looked very cute like you.”

Donghae snorted and hits Kyuhyun’s hand lightly.

“Stop saying that. Your lover will be jealous if she hears this.”

Kyuhyun can only chuckles when he saw how Donghae shook his head. Well, it’s true that he already has a girlfriend though they’re not living together or joined them but Kyuhyun ever showed them their pictures. Moreover, they’ve been together for a year. All of them agreed that Kyuhyun’s girlfriend is very pretty and seems nice.

“Can I see the babies’ room?”

Donghae nods and stands quickly. “Of course. Let’s go.”

Donghae has finished the babies room weeks ago. It just needed a bit touch and he did it with Hyukjae’s help when the director has time to sleep over and also a bit help from Ryeowook and Jongwoon when he called them because he wanted to add some more things which made the couple helped gladly.

The room is not empty anymore. Hyukjae has bought a new couch, television, and UV sterilizer. All of the things match with the walls color, thanks to Hyukjae who paid a lot of attention to every single thing.

“The room is cute and looks so comfortable for babies.” Kyuhyun commented and strolling around. “You’re not joking when you describe the room is a mixed of sunshine and moon.” Kyuhyun pointed to the ceiling which has moon and sunshine stickers that looked pretty and can glow in the dark. Everyone can tell it’s a room for kids, just as what Donghae wants and he is glad that Hyukjae helped him.

They stopped walking around the room when someone press the doorbell. Kyuhyun asked Donghae to wait, he will check who is coming. Donghae grinned when he heard familiar voices from the living room. It’s his mom and Hyukjae’s mom’s voice.

In a mere of ten seconds, the women came to the room and Donghae mom’s exclaimed happily to see how well-decorated his grandchilds room is. Well, she has seen the room from video call with her son but seeing it by real-life is different.

“This is so beautiful, son. You did so well.” His mom said.

Everyone including Hyukjae and his family said it’s such a pretty room and fits the babies. Ryeowook even said he can sleep in the room with the babies if he is too tired.

Donghae smiles and lets Hyukjae’s mom to linked her hand with his. He can see all of them are so excited to greet the babies since he has finally reached 36 weeks and two days and the last time he checked the babies with Hyukjae, the doctor explained that now both of the babies total weight is 5 kg. No wonder Donghae loves to sleep and eat.

When he passed the big mirror in the living room, Donghae stopped and looked at himself. Ryeowook loves to caress his tummy because he finds it cute especially when his tummy’s shape change time to time due of the babies kick and it’s indeed cute.

Donghae can’t wait to meet the babies but in the same time, he wants to enjoy them running and swimming inside his tummy. He will surely miss them inside, feeling their kicks, carry them like a kangaroo, and caress his big tummy.

He would say he never found his pregnancy made him ugly but sometimes, he can’t help but laugh since he never imagined he will have a big tummy. Especially pregnant with twins means your tummy will be bigger than pregnant with a baby but he loves it.

Everyone getting excited to see the twin. Just like his mom, Hyukjae’s mom, and Kyuhyun who are now talking about the babies’ plates they just bought and showing it off to the guy who has no idea.

He remembers Ryeowook also keeps asking him if he is ready, Jongwoon feels excited too because he wants to teach his twin babies how to sing perfectly (what a weird man), Sora said she will help Donghae to take care of the babies, and even Hyukjae has started to reduce his job for a few months ahead since he wants to stay with the babies.

The babies…

Donghae sits himself on the couch, looking at his tummy where the babies kick hardly as they know their father is watching them and he chuckles because on the other way it also can mean the babies are excited to see the world.

The babies… how cute they will be? Donghae can’t imagine it but he is sure he will fall in love with their cuteness.

Donghae only nods lightly when Kyuhyun asked permission for him to go home since he will have dinner in his parents’ house while the moms are at his kitchen, probably baking or cooking something and he won’t interrupt them since they looked so happy to meet again.

He breaths heavily, staring blankly to his tummy.

About his feeling to Hyukjae… there is no significant change. He still loves the man but at least, he doesn’t want to get himself too high with imagination. He doesn’t want to look like a fool in front of Hyukjae eventhough he likes all the attention he gives.

It’s hard for him to stay away from Hyukjae but he has no choice given.

They didn’t discuss the babies’ name and Hyukjae seems like forgot that part but the fact that he also helped him to arrange the babies’ room and packing the things that will be needed in the hospital was enough for him. Hyukjae will be a good father for their babies, Donghae is very sure about this.

And that evening, Hyukjae also came to his apartment. Donghae kept watching him as he walked to approach their moms. He can see how his mom smiles lovingly and open her arms widely, still like the first time they met when Donghae introduced Hyukjae as his boyfriend back then.

They hugged and Hyukjae chuckling when his mom whispered something he didn’t know what. But one thing, he knows his mom is holding her tears.

They had dinner together that night. With Hyukjae sitting across him with their own mom beside them. Their moms cooked so many food while it’s only four of them.

The atmosphere felt familiar but in the same time it hurts to remember everything by himself. Donghae smiles bitterly when he saw how Hyukjae eating calmly. It’s all different now. Their status, their lifes, their hearts. Donghae glancing at Hyukjae’s mom who also looked at him with the same bitter smile.

Hyukjae… Can I stay with you?

Can I stay with you? I wanna hold you…

That night eventhough his mom decided to sleep with beside him, Donghae pretty sure his mom just wanted to make sure he is fine. Both of them sad with the truth. Donghae will no longer to call Hyukjae as husband anymore and Donghae’s mom has to prepare her heart to see Hyukjae with another people but not her son.

No one knows but both of them actually shed their tears that night. With their back against each other, can’t see each other faces, Donghae and his mom cried in silence.

.

.

.

Donghae lets Hyukjae to push his wheel chair to the room while his hand is holding his phone, telling his mom who is visiting one of their uncle’s house that he is in the hospital with Hyukjae to check on their babies.

No, it’s not the day of the childbirth. They just wanted to check again since the contraction is more intense than previously and fixed the day of operation.

They looked so happy. It shown on their faces which are looking so glowing that everyone can see they can’t wait to meet their babies. Hyukjae didn’t even hide his smile as the doctor approach them and let them in.

Hyukjae chuckled when the doctor pulled up Donghae’s shirt and the glimpse of his big tummy can be seen. Donghae follows his smile and shifts his head to the monitor, to see and hear the babies heartbeat. They’re big, it’s like they wanted to show that they are ready to come out and greet the world.

The precious journey of having both of you inside my tummy is going to end soon.

But I will raise both of you as great as I can.

Though the journey of pregnant with twin isn’t always giving him the best time, he still loves them. The feeling grows stronger day by day. Donghae turns to see Hyukjae and surprisingly, the man also looking at him.

“I’ll shift the time. Since you said you felt the contraction harder, my prediction changed too.” The doctor smiles, fixed her hair a bit and continued, “I don’t think you can pass two weeks more.”

Donghae can’t really tell how he should feel that time. Nervous, happy, excited, but also fear. But no one paid attention to his expression since Hyukjae still talking to the doctor, making sure everything will be well prepared.

Fifteen minutes later, they finally out from the room. Hyukjae stopped when they reached the café inside the hospital and kneel in front of Donghae who sits on the wheel chair.

“Do you want to eat or drink something?”

Actually Donghae doesn’t have certain drink in his mind but he answered, “A bottle of orange juice.”

Hyukjae nods, walking there to buy the orange juice and a few snacks for the latter while Donghae waits and looking out of the window. When Hyukjae still waiting for his turn, his phone ringing.

Henry.

Hyukjae sighs but choose to pick up the call and trying to sound excited he said, “Hello! How are you, Henry?”

But his expected was far away. “Can we meet? I have something to discuss about the other group’s concert from my company, the boss also wants to meet you. He wants you to be the director.”

Hyukjae didn’t notice how Henry sounds so cold and didn’t answer his question immediately. He gives the money to the cashier after whispering his order.

Hyukjae moves aside to wait for his order. “When are they planning to hold the concert?”

“In the end of this year.”

The director thinks for a while. It’s quite a long time to prepare if the concert will be in the end of the year. It’s enough for him to arrange what they needed and actually, it’s more than enough.

“Okay. Text me where you want to meet.”

Hyukjae takes the things, walks to Donghae’s place after he hung up, and pushes the wheel chair to his car. He helps Donghae to stand and sit, asking the latter a few times to convince himself that Donghae is comfortable with the seat position. The ride filled with silence, no one talks about the operation or other things related but Hyukjae accompanies Donghae back to his apartment before he drives to the restaurant they’re going to meet.

It’s a very well-known restaurant. Not only has a good interior but the food also very nice.

Hyukjae parked his car and quickly stepped inside. He said the boss’ name when the waiter asked him if he has made any reservation and he leads Hyukjae to the VIP room. Hyukjae doesn’t feel nervous at all since this is not his first time to have a meeting with important person.

But what makes him taken aback is Henry, the only person inside. He just needed a minute to recover himself and chuckles lightly.

“Hi, Henry.”

Henry didn’t answer his greet. Instead, the younger man takes his cup of coffee and sip it before his eyes moves to Hyukjae who sits across of him. A smile tugged on the director’s lips and thus, Henry clears his throat.

“Seems like you’re busy nowadays because you keep avoiding me.” Henry said with his cold tone while narrowing his eyes.

“I’m not avoiding you.”

Henry laughing mockingly, shrugging his shoulders. “But you didn’t meet me last time and barely replied my messages.”

Hyukjae exhales, perfectly awares Henry’s mood isn’t good right now. He can’t blame him though since he also knows he was wrong. It’s true that he barely replied to Henry messages but he has reason for it. He works for his upcoming jobs, checking all the details, went to meeting, checking the report, and of course he also spent his time with Donghae although Donghae’s mom has stayed for a few days with the pregnant male.

But Hyukjae isn’t going to tell his reason and muttered a small sorry and when Henry still with his cold expression, he grabs the other’s hand and squeeze it lightly.

“I didn’t mean to avoid you.” He rubs Henry’s palm, drawing circles on it which succeed to send the other’s heart pounding. “Stop pouting. You look like a duck.”

He laughed when Henry widened his eyes, ready to smack him but it’s all stopped when the boss comes and greets them. He knows he has earned forgiveness from the man and when the boss gesture they’re going to start the meeting, Hyukjae takes out his phone to change it into silent mode.

“Director Lee, I’m glad to meet you again.”

That’s the sign the meeting will begin.

On the other side, Donghae is sitting in his living room while laughing and clapping his hands happily when the woman in front of him standing and telling him the story about a man who keeps confessing his love to her.

Sora shakes her head dramatically, taking out the love letter the man has sent to her parents’ house. The letter filled with cheesy words which makes Donghae cringed.

“That’s… ridiculous!” He winced when Sora taking out another letter and shows it to him.

The woman nods, totally agrees with what Donghae said. When Donghae reads the letter one by one with chuckles and sarcasm, Sora bursts into hysterical laughter.

Sora will also come a few times when she has free times and that woman helps him a lot. Sora would tell him a lot of funny stories and showed him what she has learned from Youtube. Sometimes she did make-up, sometimes she cooked, sometimes she dance, everything is really entertain Donghae.

She puts her hand to Donghae’s tummy and smiles when the babies kicks. They didn’t talk about the divorce anymore as she respects Donghae’s decision to try healing his heart. But Sora isn’t a fool who can’t recognize the sadness on the man’s eyes.

She had talked to Heechul and the lawyer suggested for her to keep quiet and let them find the answer for their own, especially Hyukjae. Oh, how Sora wants to give a slap to her brother because of his lacks.

Sora and Heechul are noticed how Hyukjae’s eyes changed a bit when they talked about Donghae’s pregnancy but the pregnancy itself wasn’t the reason why the director eyes blinked or shaking without him noticed. The truth is the name, Lee Donghae.

Hyukjae didn’t realise how he would smile when they talked about Donghae’s habit during his pregnancy but Sora does.

None of them wanted to talk this and choose to keep the assume by themselves. They will wait and look how Hyukjae solves his own problem, watching the next steps for his own life.

“I’ll make lasagna for you.” Sora said and standing up. She has prepared the ingredients and eventhough she rarely comes to Donghae’s apartment, it doesn’t mean she will be awkward. She treats the kitchen as like she is in her own house and that’s really makes Donghae happy.

Donghae chuckles when the babies keep moving and kicks him. The babies love food.

“Let’s eat lasagna that your aunty makes, okay?”

Donghae laughing after some kicks more and decided to watch the TV. He didn’t have something he really wants to watch so he keeps pressing the remote, switching to every channel with blank expression until Sora brings the plates and drinks to the living room.

“This smells really good, Noona.”

Sora gives a slight smile before takes a spoon and starts to eat. They didn’t talk because too focus to the news in the TV and busy to savory the tasty lasagna.

But actually, Donghae didn’t really pay attention to the TV. He constantly frown and hisses silently, rubbing his tummy and fidget on his seat. He feels the pain not only on his tummy but also his back and it feels like cramps.

The pain gets stronger and more often nowadays but that evening is especially strong. They becomes overwhelmed but Donghae trying to hold it by closing his eyes a few times and praying. He watched the clock besides the TV sometimes and starts to questioning himself when the pain doesn’t go.

There is no probability of me going to give birth today, right?

Donghae remembers the doctor’s prediction and they just came from the hospital. Donghae believes the doctor prediction will be right but the fact that feeling lasts and happened more intensely, he can’t hold back. Donghae grabs Sora’s hand, startling the woman who was too immersed with the TV and quickly put aside their plates when she realised how Donghae’s face changed.

“Donghae? What happened? Are you okay?”

That’s stupid question, she knows, but she is too panick when Donghae sweats a lot and his breath shudders. He keeps touching his tummy with his other hand while eyes closed tight and whimpers.

“I-it hurts.”

Sora stares at her brother-in-law in disbelief. “I-is it today?!”

Donghae grips the woman’s hand tighter, as if he afraid he would fall down or being separated. Sora helps him to lay on the couch, wiping his sweat, while her other hand finding her phone and trying to call her brother.

“It’s not t-today. D-doctor said a-around two weeks more or else b-but n-not today.” Donghae gritted his teeth, the pain becomes unbearable each seconds. “I… akh.”

Donghae doesn’t know if it’s a real contraction or fake but it hurts. He doesn’t  want to believe what he had read on Google but now as he experienced it for real, it is so damn hurt for him.

“Damn Hyukjae! He doesn’t pick up my calls!”

The woman bites her own thumb, finding her mom’s contact and trying to call the other woman but it’s all in vain since she remembers both her parents are in the plane heading to Hongkong now and they might be turn-off their phones.

“Wait, I’ll call Ryeowook.”

Donghae nibbles on his bottom lip and sometimes shouting when he can’t bear with it anymore. Sora didn’t care with how red her hand is or the scars that would leave because of Donghae’s scratch and grips. She starts to worry and having an urge to vomit –her habit when she is too panicked when no one of her calls answered.

Ryeowook doesn’t pick up too and it frustrated her even more. Knowing it will be in vain if they keep waiting, Sora looks at Donghae and asked, “Can you walk? I’ll help you and we will going down to find a taxi together, okay?” She gets her stuff ready and turn-off the TV. “Have you prepared for the babies’ clothes or other necessities?”

“Yeah, inside their r-room.”

Sora quickly runs to the room and takes the dark red backpack. She helps Donghae to stand and places the man’s arm on her shoulders. Walking to the elevator wasn’t easy since Donghae keeps groaning and saying his tummy is hurt and Sora also not that strong. She is a girl with a thin and not so tall body and helping Donghae who is pregnant…

We can do it.

Sora tries her best to hold Donghae’s body and not letting him fall. The elevator gradually reached the ground floor.

“Please wait here. I’ll find a taxi from my application and manually. I’ll be back. Okay?” She helps Donghae to sit on the bench outside the building and giving him her cardigan when she felt the cold air and both of them didn’t bring their coats.

Sora walking around the street and keep calling for Hyukjae. It’s such a pity since she doesn’t know Donghae’s mom phone number and she can’t drive by herself. But the worst of all, neither of Hyukjae or Ryeowook picked up her calls.

She almost cried when she finally saw the taxi and asked the driver if he can bring them to the hospital. Surely, Sora will thank the man later. They drive back to the bench and Sora winced when Donghae crying because he can’t hold his pain anymore and he really sweats a lot.

“Donghae? Let’s go in. We’ll go to hospital.” Sora helps him to walk and just then, she asked the driver to drive faster. Donghae doesn’t stop crying and groaning, wishing the pain can be ended soon. Sora never stop to calling Hyukjae and biting her thumb. It’s been more than ten times she has called her brother and none of it been picked up.

Seriously, Hyukjae…. Where are you actually?!

“Donghae? You’ve to be strong, okay? We almost reached the hospital.” Sora pleads, holding Donghae’s hand and wiping the sweat. She keeps praying inside her heart, wishing Donghae can feel better.

They arrived after more than fifteen minutes ride because of the traffic. Sora and the driver quickly bring Donghae to the hospital, screaming to the nurse to quickly help the pregnant male. Sora didn’t even care when the taxi driver said she gave too much money for him since she chased after the nurse and still trying to call his brother. She doesn’t even care when she hits her body several times to the wall or chairs in front of her.

When finally Hyukjae picked up, Sora screamed as hard as she can while rubbing Donghae’s hand to give him a comfort.

“QUICKLY COME TO THE ADDRESS I’VE SENT TO YOU! DONGHAE IS IN HOSPITAL NOW!”

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.

.

It is not so hard for Hyukjae to earn every single CEO’s trusts since he has worked on this field for quite a long time and has such a big name. Hyukjae isn’t simply director for concert. Almost everyone who worked in entertainment industry knows that he has a big talent and all the concert he directed will be a success. It’s not only the pleasure for the fans. The group will get more attention from public since it’s Lee Hyukjae, one of the most well-known director.

Hyukjae definitely knows what to do and what don’t including find the best person he could work with. He is very careful with his work and knowing fully well that not all person in this world can be trusted. Thus, he also known as less-talker but with amazing works.

Just like that day, when Hyukjae attentively listening to every single words the CEO said and taking notes to important points. He doesn’t talk much or giving response and for a while the CEO thought he isn’t paying attention but when the older man finished his explanation –describing his planning, Hyukjae opened his mouth.

He gives some comments to the CEO ideas, giving inputs, and adding it with his own ideas. He is not forcing the CEO to agree with him but from the CEO’s eyes, Hyukjae knows the man is thinking and will agree to him in the end.

They kept talking about their plans and surely just as what he has predicted, the CEO agreed and they will hold another meeting soon with the group. Henry didn’t say many things though he paid attention to the men, well to Hyukjae precisely. Henry will smile shly when Hyukjae stares at him, as if he has caught off-guard.

It’s hard to tell that he is not in love with the handsome director now since he can feel how his heart thumping inside his chest everytime they close to each other or simply by thinking about Hyukjae. That’s why he was so upset when the older man cancelled their last meeting but everything will be fine now. He has forgiven the other man and ready to spend another time with Hyukjae.

But of course, it’s not that day.

“Okay, I’ll end the meeting here.” The CEO standing up and shaking Hyukjae’s hand with a big smile plestered on his face. “Your great ideas are really fresh. I can’t wait for the next meeting to happen.” Then, he turns to his worker and said, “Henry, I think you need to give me the newest schedules and arrange for our next meeting with director Lee.”

And so, it’s not that day they can meet and hangout because Henry senses he will stay at his workplace for so late. Well, it’s still a pleasure to meet Hyukjae that day so Henry won’t complain.

“I’ll call you later.” Hyukjae muttered before they separated. And just that, Henry grins widely.

Hyukjae sits in his car, taking out his phone from his pocket, and surprised when he saw so many missed calls from Sora since half an hours ago. This must be urgent since his sister never called him as many times like this before.

When he was about to call her back, his phone ringing. Sora is calling again.

“Hello?” 

“QUICKLY COME TO THE ADDRESS I’VE SENT TO YOU! DONGHAE IS IN HOSPITAL NOW!”

She hung up after that, leaving Hyukjae with eyes wide open. He reads the message that contains the hospital address, starts his engine, and drives as fast as he could to the hospital. His mind can’t be calmed. They just came back from the hospital so what happened to Donghae until he needs to go back?

Hyukjae can’t find the answer but he knows his heart pounding so fast and he starts to sweat because of nervousness. He didn’t care with the rules. What he knows is his heart telling him there is something wrong. He feels uneasy.

Twenty minutes later, he finally arrives and quickly parked and run through the hospital as Sora has given him the direction. His breath uneven when Sora approached him and urge him to enter the room, where Donghae still lying on the bed with his pale face and groans weakly because of the pain. The pregnant male has changed his clothes now with patient uniform.

“We’re waiting for you, Mister Lee.” The nurse said and handed him the file that needs to be signed as a requirement before the operation started. The files contains agreement that they’re agreed to hold the operation and Hyukjae is sober enough to sign it without anyone forced him to do so. “Please read and sign. We need it before we do the operation.”

Donghae smiles lightly as Hyukjae takes the pen and sign. It’s him who asked the nurse to wait for a while because he was so convinced that Hyukjae will come and fortunately, he really is.

The director bends his body and unconciously puts his hand on Donghae’s head. His eyes twitched in full of worries.

“Are you excited?” Donghae asked, still with his weak smile. “We will meet them soon.”

Hyukjae gulps. Of course he is excited but that time, he doesn’t know why but he has bad feeling. His mind can’t concentrate to the babies but Donghae. And as if he can read what’s on Hyukjae’s mind, Donghae grabs Hyukjae’s hand and hold it eventhough it’s not as strong as he wants it to be.

“Can I ask your favor?” Their eyes met. Donghae’s lips quivered but he keeps holding Hyukjae’s hand, sometimes rubs it and his mind reminiscing the warmth. He scanned Hyukjae’s face, keep memorizing every part of his face and how he smells like. He didn’t wait for Hyukjae to say anything and continued, “Whatever happened later… if the doctor asked you to choose between me and our babies to safe, p—”

“No. There won’t be any condition like that. Both of you will be fine.” Hyukjae cuts and squeezed Donghae’s hand.

That’s his fear. That’s what makes him feels weak when he drives and walks. That’s what makes his heart pounding so hard. That fear. The imagination of losing Donghae. But he keeps saying to himself that won’t be happened. Donghae and their babies will be fine.

Hyukjae doesn’t know that it’s not only him who has bad feeling that time but Donghae too.

“I just wanted you to promise me, H-hyukjae. Please choose our babies to safe.” He tries to smile and pointed to the bag behind Hyukjae. “There is notebook inside. I-I’ve chosen their names but you can change it if you don’t like.”

And that was the last thing Donghae said. The doctor comes, saying the operation room is ready and gesture to the nurses to bring Donghae. Hyukjae followed until in front of the room with Sora tails behind him. The woman holds his brother when Hyukjae keeps wanting to enter the room while the nurses forbids it.

“Noona, I have to come in! I have to make sure Dong—“

“He will be okay.” Sora tries to assure her brother, pulling his body against her. Both of them embracing each other and that’s enough to make Hyukjae bursted into tears. He lets his sister to drag him to sit on the chair nearby and hug her more. Hyukjae’s hands were shaking. He can’t push away the thought of losing Donghae but he also can’t do anything but hugging Sora’s tightly.

.

.

.

“Doctor Park,”

The woman raised his head from looking at the monitor when her patient called her name. She smiles and rubs Donghae’s arm. It’s not a new thing if the patients got so nervous even if it’s not their first time giving a birth and as a good doctor she is, assuring and comforting her patient is a must.

“Do you want to drink?”

“No.” Donghae exhales. “Can I ask you something?”

The doctor nods and gesture Donghae to ask.

“Is there any possibility that you only can safe one of us? I mean… between me and my babies.”

Doctor Park is surprised but only in a mere five seconds. She chuckles lightly and nods. “It might be happened but so rare.” She sits on the chair while waiting for the nurses to prepare all the things. “I understand if you’re so nervous.” She checked the monitor, looking at Donghae’s heartbeat again. It’s still safe and normal.

But Donghae remains unshaken even if the doctor has said it’s all safe. With a serious gaze, he muttered for only two of them to hear.

“If everything happens and you have to choose whom to safe, please safe my babies.”

Her smile vanished when that sentence reach her ears. She taken aback, as if someone has slapped her face and suddenly her body tensed. Donghae’s eyes has become teary and with his cold hand due of nervous, he touched the doctor’s wrist.

“These babies deserve life and I’m more than willing to give them a wonderful lifes. I want them to be happy babies and see what the world has.” He begins to cry. “I know you have a good confidence, it’s just… I have a bad feeling.”

The doctor feels like someone has cut . She can’t choose the right words in the moment but manages to say, “They will have a wonderful life but you have to fight too. The babies need their father by their side to teach them every great things this world could offer.”

Donghae doesn’t say anything but gives a light nod. Doctor Park stands up, looking at Donghae who starts to close his eyes when the light above him . With a deep sigh, the doctor begins to inject. Donghae tries to keep his mind in positive way even until the injection done and he feels numb. He wants to trust Doctor Park and for the last glance before he closed his eyes, Donghae prays.

Doctor Park is a middle-aged woman. She has worked as a doctor for more than a decade and eventhough she has a lot of experience, the death still never been easy. She couldn’t bring herself to look how miserable the moms or dads when they have to accept the news that she can’t safe the babies or their wife or husband. She is a doctor but it doesn’t mean their life is fully under her control.

But as what she said, it’s rare happened.

She remembers every single words Donghae said to him a few moments ago. How he stared at her. How he felt uncertain.

Everything will be fine. Three of you will be safe.

“Let’s start now.”

The doctor puts on her mask and eventhough she keeps frowning, looking at every part that need to be cut carefully, and the noise of the machine, she still praying from the bottom of her heart.

Your babies need you, Donghae.

She will keep monitoring Donghae’s heartbeat. She paid a lot of attention to every detail of the operation.

While on the outside of the room, Hyukjae sits with face-palmed. Beside him, there is Mrs Lee –Donghae’s mom– who keeps praying and assuring him that all of them will be fine. And across of him, there is Ryeowook who keeps peeking everytime he hears someone walking, thought that’s the doctor or nurse coming to say something.

Sora is stands a bit further since she is talking with her parents. Telling them that Donghae is giving a birth now and no need to be asked twice, her parents prepared to going back to Seoul.

She almost slide down and sits on the floor if someone not grabbing her arm, preventing her. When she raised her head, there is Heechul who stands with a plastic bag in his right hand and a small smile on his face. Sora didn’t wait for any minutes. She throws her body to his best friend’s and Heechul her back.

Sora has told him everything and he can understand how this situation must be shocked her. From the place he stands, Heechul can see how Hyukjae also feel frustrated and nervous. He keeps looking around the operation room, sometimes he walks back and forth, sometimes he stands still.

They wait together and sits on the chair provided. Hyukjae closed his eyes, starts to praying for only God knows how many times it’s been for that day. He even ignores Heechul when the lawyer gave him a bottle of mineral water.

One hours passed and finally they heard the loud cries from the operation room. Ryeowook sighs, smiling widely while embracing Mrs Lee to congratulate her. Not long after that, two nurses coming out and showing Hyukjae the babies.

They looked adorable with their chubby cheeks and red skin. The baby girl has Donghae’s lips while the baby boy has Hyukjae’s nose. Everyone can tell who is the baby girl and the baby boy easily and when Hyukjae takes the baby girl while Mrs Lee holds the baby boy, the man can’t hold his cry.

He feels so full. Can’t believe that there he is, looking and even can hold their babies. He can even touch the babies’ finger to know is it real or just his dream and when the babies slightly whimpers, don’t want to be disturbed, Hyukjae is ready to cry again because of this new feeling.

But that wasn’t last long when Sora asked the nurse how Donghae’s condition now. One of the nurse looked so nervous but the other nurse succeed to answer.

“Mister Lee is still inside the operation room with Doctor Park and other nurses.”

Hyukjae can sense something strange. He gives the baby to Sora and looking straight to the nurse. “Is he fine? Everything is alright, isn’t it? Can I see him now?”

The nurse her bottom lip and bites her lip for a while. “Mister Lee… he is bleeding excessively. T-that’s why we have to wait for a bit more.”

Mrs Lee gasped and almost fall if not for Heechul hold her arms and bring her to sit while giving the baby back to the nurse. While Hyukjae’s face becomes pale with his shoulders starting to shake.

“It won’t be long, right? The operation will be finished soon and Donghae will sober after that. Isn’t he?”

But the nurses can’t say anything as they hurry excuse themselves and said they have to bring the babies to incubator room.

It must be not fatal… right? The doctor didn’t ask me for my decision so she can save Donghae.

Yes, of course she can.

But Hyukjae slumped down and begins to cry when their conversation replied. He wants to push away that thought but he can’t. The fear becomes real and all he want is to be sure that everything is okay.

I wanna grow old with you, Hyukjae.

The man leans his back to the wall behind him, ignoring how Sora hugging him again. The happiness he felt for a while has gone, replacing all of it with worries and fears. Hyukjae doesn’t care how messy or miserable or awful he looks like right now. He doesn’t notice how Mrs Lee approached him and grabbed his shoulders to give a hug. To support each other.

Hyukjae doesn’t realise how his eyes staring blankly to his surrounding but his mind occupied with just one person. The person… the reason of why he cries and can’t stop himself from worrying.

Donghae… you have to be safe. You have to stay alive.

Don’t you want to grow old with me? With our babies?

As… a family? Our family. Our little family.

And from countless times that day, he explodes in Mrs Lee’s (Donghae’s mom) arms. He never know the thought of losing Donghae would be scared him that much. He never realise Donghae’s presence and life will be matter and effect him so much.

He never knows that Donghae still means a lot for him until that day.

He never knows he will able to regret all his actions towards the younger man until that day where everything seems suffocated him. Hyukjae’s body shivering with every thought of losing Donghae and won’t able to hug, kiss, hold, and saying the truth.

 So... yeah... I'm sorry if this is too long and too fast T_T I hope all of you can get the sad feeling eventhough I think it's not.... that sad hahaha>< So how was it? Hahaha, and just in case if you guys wondered how many pages this is, this is 23 pages ^-^ Hope you guys won't get boring when reading this ^^ 

Thank you for everyone who reading, subscribing, upvoting, waiting, commenting, and giving suggestions❤️❤️❤️❤️ Hope you're not crying in this chapter hihihi^^ I'm sorry if there are a lot of mistakes in grammaticallyT_T last but not least, take care and stay safe!^-^ Have a great day!❤️❤️❤️❤️