"Stupid, Lee Hyukjae."

Yes, the number of times you called me stupid can't even be compared to the numbers of the leaves in a tree. Only in silence I can call you that you are aswell as stupid as me. I hate you because hating you is easier. I hate you because you are everything I have ever wanted. And I hate you because there's not a single damn thing I can do about it. We have been doing this a lot before, This dance for two that brings us as close as possible without allowing us to go beyond and then just like that you are gone again. And even like that I can't still hate you.

I hate you for being the only one I needed. You made me feel comfortable in my own pace and taught me to love my self. You brought confidence that made me realize just how beautiful a person I could be. The more time we get to spend together, the more I believe that we were made for each other.

I seriously hate your bubbly and goofy nature and the way your gums shows up when you laugh. I hate your eyes and your lips, they looked very enchanting to me. I hated the way you always talk about your love but cuddle me the same way every single time. And I hate to the way you squeeze your arms tight around me.

I hated the way you dance at random and awkward moments. And the way you get excited dancing with me. The way you get frustrated with my little attention span and then laugh because you know you can’t do anything about it.

I hated your single child behaviors I should be the only one acting like that. Yes, I need someone like you, the only person willing to and able to deal with me. I know that you get impatient, when I'm needy, and when I love getting my way in everything; just so you know I am also awkward, and crumbles under your reproach.

You make me laugh. I hate you so damn much for that. You make me laugh when I don’t even want to smile, but you made me smile on every hardest days of my life.

How can you make it so easy? Being with you is very hard. You can see right through me; which scares me but also allows me to show you who I truly am.

I really hate you. I really really hate you but as much as I hate you. I hate myself for loving you. My bestfriend, my lifetime companion I love you so much when I know I can't. So, please let me hate you. Let me atleast just hate you because I know I can never be more than just a friend. We're bestfriends, JUST THAT.

"Stupid, Lee Donghae! What are you doing spacing out while staring at me? Haha, Let's go!"

Yes, the truth is I hate you because I can't hate you at all—not even a bit.