Chaeyoung fixates her gaze on the coffee in her hand. Her eyes flick towards her buzzing phone, feels her chest tighten momentarily before she focuses back on her coffee. Jisoo and Jennie have arrived at her place since an hour ago and she still hasn’t talked about what bothers her mind. Lisa couldn’t make it since she’s out of town for work, but she’s currently on the phone with them.

Jennie groans on her side. “Are you that upset that Lisa can’t join us now or you’re upset that you couldn’t sing?”

She shakes her head. Her phone buzzes once again, and she doesn’t need to flip it to see who’s calling. If she hasn’t miscalculated, it’s the fifth time Jungkook has called her. She swallows hard, places the coffee on the table and combs her hair to the back with her finger.

“So are you going to tell us what’s going on?” Jisoo says, leaning forward as she rests both arms on the table.

Chaeyoung bites her lip hard before she sighs and pouts. She doesn’t respond immediately, taking her time to inhale deeply. After letting out a long exhale, she turns to Jennie. “Remember when I kissed Jaehyun?”

Jennie’s head jerks backward, confusion settling in. “Yeah? What about it?”

“Remember what I told you about it?” she asks, turning to Jisoo as well.

Jisoo makes a thinking face. “That his breath smells like orange?”

“No,” Chaeyoung sighs, her face falls. “That when I kissed him, I actually imagined him as Chanyeol.”

She remembers meeting Jaehyun, introduced by Jisoo. They’d been attracted to one another very instantly, and the relationship -if it’s even a relationship -ended in a few weeks, so quick, just like how quick they’d started. She knew that when she got attracted to Jaehyun and pretty much jumped into the relationship, she was treating him like a rebound. She had been too heartbroken with the freshly broken relationship with Chanyeol that when someone had shown such interest towards her, she did not hesitate to show the same interest.

Jisoo raises her brows. “Oh…kay?”

“Let me guess, the same thing happened when you and Junhoe kissed?” Jennie asks.

“Yes,” Chaeyoung admits with a dejected sigh.

Junhoe and her lasted slightly longer. Almost two months. Almost two months before she decided that she couldn’t do it, that she couldn’t pretend that he was Chanyeol, that she wasn’t ready for anything like that, that she couldn’t help but wished for Junhoe to be just like Chanyeol, the fake Chanyeol that she was so in love with and that was so unfair to him.

“Last night,” Chaeyoung continues. “Jungkook and I… we kissed and stuff and-”

“Stuff? What does that even mean?” Lisa cuts her off over the phone.

“Yeah, what’s ‘stuff’?" Jennie asks with a scrunch of her face before something seems to pop into her mind when Chaeyoung stays silent for a while to think of how to answer that question. “Oh…You slept with him?”

“…yeah,” Chaeyoung admits.

“And…?” Jennie trails off, waiting for Chaeyoung to finish the sentence, but then, forms a big O and her eyes enlarge at Chaeyoung. “Oh .”

Chaeyoung nods when her friend manages to connect the dots. “Yes.”

“You screamed Chanyeol’s name in bed?”

“What?” Chaeyoung almost chokes on her own saliva, hanging open at Jennie.

“Oh my god, Chaeyoung!” Lisa gasps loudly from the other line, but she can hear her friend stifling her laughter at the same time. “That’s sort of ed up, Chaeng.”

“No! Oh my god!” Looks like Jennie failed to connect the dots. “I did not scream Chanyeol’s name in bed!”

“Huh?” Jennie crosses her arms over her front. “So what happened, then?”

Chaeyoung sighs heavily with closed eyes. “Chanyeol didn’t even cross my mind, even for a split second.”

There is silence before Jisoo raises her brows and simply responds with a bland “Oh.”

“Okay? Then?” Jennie asks impatiently and Chaeyoung narrows her eyes before the older female holds up her palms in the air. “Oh. Wait. Wait. Oh my god.”

She hopes Jennie finally gets it this time.

“You mean to tell me, from the moment you were kissing up to the moment you were being nasty on bed with Jungkook, you didn’t imagine him as Chanyeol, you didn’t have a single thought of Chanyeol, not even a tiny little bit?” Jennie asks as she gestures with her fingers at the word tiny, her voice going tiny as well.

“Not even a tiny little bit,” Chaeyoung confirms and nods her head vigorously before she realizes something. “Oh, actually. We didn’t sleep together as in… doing that. We just slept. Like, just sleeping, literally. Just-” She bites her lips when she thinks she’s almost smiling.

“There was no second base?” Lisa asks. “Blegh. Boring.”

“No,” she groans. “W