Song suggestion whilst reading: iKON's Goodbye Road (New Kids: The Final Mini Album) 

“Hi?” Hanbin belatedly replied to the flustered stranger. 

He slowly stands up and walks towards Jennie’s direction. Picking up her apple that dropped to the ground, he hands it back to Jennie who is now beet-red. 

“Jennie, right?” an amused Hanbin inquires. 

“You.. you know me?” A frozen Jennie asks as she steps towards him to retrieve the apple from his hands. 

Hanbin pauses 

“We’re in the same class, aren’t we?” 

Being in close proximity with each other, Hanbin finds that she looked very familiar. 

She’s the girl from the record shop, Hanbin eventually realises.  

My fan…. B.I’s fan

Hanbin recognised and was able to put a name to each and every person in his class. It was a conscious effort made out of courtesy rather than anything else. He just never had much interest in people and so he never made an effort to notice his surroundings. 

Amused, Hanbin chuckles to himself. He was bewildered that it took him this long to notice that his classmate was an actual fan of his. 

Not only iKON’s fan. 

But also a fan of B.I 

And because of this very fact, he felt particularly generous that day and didn’t express any discontentment towards the intruder that invaded his normally much preferred privacy. 

“What are you doing here?” Hanbin starts interrogating her. He was still wary of her intentions.

“I… I followed the humming” Jennie quickly lies, hoping that it would suffice as an excuse.

Hanbin slightly raises his eyebrows as he examined her expressions, before he turned around and returned back to his seat. 

“How was it?” Hanbin nonchalantly asks, as he readjusted the chair to face her direction. Aware that she would be familiar with his style of music, B.I’s music, Hanbin was interested in what she thought of his new creation. 

“Huh?” Jennie was taken by surprise and unable to comprehend the sudden question

“The melody.” Hanbin pauses and looks at her.  “How was it?” 

“Oh!” A perplexed Jennie takes a couple of seconds to gather herself before responding.

“I’m not familiar with the song itself, but it’s beautiful.” She slowly responds. 

“Beautiful, catchy…” she pauses in hesitation for a second before continuing “and it is reminiscent of a sense of unexplained longing and loneliness” Jennie earnestly replies. 

To any other person, she wouldn’t have gone into any more depth than just a brief description. Jennie didn’t know for what reason, but she felt that it would be fine to share more than that. That she wouldn’t be brushed off or be taken as a joke if she shared this with Hanbin.

Hanbin analyses Jennie’s expressions as she gave her detailed response. A slight grin forms on his face and he quietly chuckles. 

“You got that just from a simple melody?” Hanbin beamed, clearly amazed by the stranger. 

Although it was not as vibrant as the smile Hanbin had during their first meeting, this was the first time she saw Hanbin smile since. She stood there speechless. She didn’t expect any of this. 

She quickly realises that this was her chance. She couldn’t let this interaction just end here. Not when her mysterious long time crush who always sat silently at the corner of the classroom was finally talking to her. 

Jennie gathers some courage and all in one breath, she blurts out 

“What’s the song called? When was it released? I want to hear the full song!” she gasps for air as soon as she finishes.

Still very amused, Hanbin looks at Jennie and replies 

“You won’t find this anywhere” 

Yet, Hanbin thinks to himself

“What do you mean?” a now very curious Jennie questions him.

“It’s a hobby” he stoically replies

Blown away by the new revelation, Jennie stands silently in shock. 

“That’s … th-that’s so amazing. You write music?” Jennie stops for a moment to gather her thoughts. “Can I listen to it?” Jennie asks in a hopeful manner 

“Actually.. I only came up with it just now.” Hanbin replies, observing the rapid sink in Jennie’s expression. 

“Maybe… when I finish,” a nervous Hanbin adds, saying the first thing that comes to mind. 

 In an attempt to change the subject before he makes any more promises he cannot keep, Hanbin diverts the conversation. Noticing that Jennie is still awkwardly standing in the middle of the rooftop with her apple in hand and apologetic that he couldn’t even promise to show her his unreleased works, as B.I was still a well-kept secret, he stands up and walks to the abandoned class seats and drags the cleanest looking one back next to his. He dusts the seat off with his bare hand before gesturing her to sit down.

// 

Despite currently being quite a prolific model, Jennie wasn’t able to keep her emotions in check. The instant feeling of rejection to immediate joy when Hanbin relayed what appeared to be an invitation to keep in contact after this meeting today was directly translated through her facial expressions that day. In the midst of battling her conflicting emotions, she sees Hanbin getting up from his chair to grab her a seat. 

She doesn’t miss the small details, like how she catches him dusting the chair off before gesturing her to have a seat next to him. In what seemed like the millionth time that day, Jennie flushes a shade of pink before she slowly walks towards the chair.

A gentleman. With manners. She thought as she recalls Jisoo’s constant slander of Hanbin’s character, whom consistently insinuated that despite being crazily handsome, Hanbin had no ounce of manners.

I can’t wait to tell her about this, Jennie internally thinks, while she tries to distract herself and avoid eye contact with her long time crush. 

“So, you like music?” he speaks in a low steadied manner. Jennie quickly takes a glance of what the other was doing, and sees him fiddling around the packaging of his banana milk carton. 

Without thinking much, she starts doing the same with her apple.

“Yeah, I love music.” She begins “I prefer emotional ballads and relatable emotive lyrics.” 

Out of habit, she starts rambling as soon as she begins talking about music, and specifically, her favourite artist. She turns towards Hanbin, as her face lights up.

“My all time favourite has to be iKON’s music. A producer called B.I writes everything for them and despite not being in the industry for too long, he by far has written the most captivating songs.”

The mention of B.I. intrigued Hanbin, especially after seeing Jennie physically brighten up at the mention of himself.

“Is that so?….  Then, your favourite song?” Hanbin cautiously questions 

“It would definitely be Goodbye Road..  I’ve listened to it everyday since it came out.” Jennie passionately replies

“Hm..” She hears him exhale and after a bit of a pause, he adds “It’s mine too.”

Jennie turns her head and sees him look up towards the sky, 

“Any reason why you like it the best?” He asks as he raises his arm to cover a portion of his eyes from the blinding sunlight. 

Jennie hesitates, thinking deeply, before answering. 

“The song is truly a masterpiece…. It transitions from a sense of regret for being in a relationship to a feeling of absolute remorse.” 

She stares at the space in front of her, nothing specifically in particular, as she continues: 

“In the song there are the lines:

    If I knew we’d say goodbye, then I wouldn’t have loved you this much

    I didn’t meet you just to cry

    I didn’t build up memories to say farewell 

But it’s quickly revealed that the person is already leaving on a lonely road. 

And at the end, the writer just wishes that their heart-wrenching loved one isn’t ever in pain anymore and that they only walk on a flower road. 

    Please leave me and walk only on the flower path

    Please go carefully, as you walk on this lonely goodbye road

    Throw away all memories of me

That really, the writer truly wishes that their loved one is happier than they were while they were together. 

   Living in the past is such an incompetent loneliness

    Being forgotten in these memories is such a cruel pain, more than any other moment

    I loved you to death but in the end, I did not die

The writer expresses utter sorrow through such grief. As if through that same agony, the song is his last tribute to their loved one. 

    Take care my beautiful person. Leave me and be happy

    Please go carefully my heart-breaking love

    Don’t hurt like you did when you were with me 

    Please don’t be in pain*

Well, of course this is all my interpretation though.”

Jennie breathes out a long exhale. The idea that she just revealed her deep thoughts on her idol’s song to her longtime crush would have embarrassed her previously, but Jennie watches him carefully and thankfully, he showed no signs of judgement or any hostility towards her. 

Hanbin simply remained very still, as if engrossed in his own thoughts, still looking up at the sky.

“Your analysis is quite spot on” he silently says, only loud enough for Jennie to just make out. 

Curious as to what Hanbin was so fixated on, Jennie replicates Hanbin’s posture and stares at the same sky. 

And both share comfort in the calming silence, both later drifting to sleep as they were embraced by the warmth of the sun and light windy breeze.

S/N: *Lyrics from Goodbye Road by iKON