“ Heajung ? “ I turns around where I am and see’s a tall man standing by the door frame.

“ Suho ? What are you doing here , did anyone follow you ? “ he shakes his head and closes the door behind him.

“ Haejung , Yixing told me, I know you told him not too, but he was worried. Why didn’t you tell me , how long has this been going on for ? “ his voice is harsh and I can tell he is extremely pissed off.

“ Not long , just awhile , don’t worry alright if you have somewhere you need to be at you should go  “ I wrap his scarf around his neck but he grabs my hand and pulls me flush against his chest.  “ Haejung , I’m sorry , this is all my fault and i’m suppose to be the one taking care of you “

I smile and gently pat his back trying to calm him down. “ Its never your fault , just work hard and do what you’re suppose to do , I can take care of myself and Yixing comes here occasionally to help me out so don’t worry “

He smiles and looks at me oddly.

“ Now you’re going after my dongsaeng eh ! “

I’m absolutely in awe and send a flying hand to his back, having him doubling up in laughter and pain.

“ I’m not going after him , he just comes here , I don’t know why either. “ he laughs some more.

He concludes that Yixing likes me , because he’s known the boy for years and he had never behaved like that to anyone before. Ever.

“ I’m sure the two of you have tons of girls swooning and wanting to date the both of you , please leave me out of this. “

“ He’s not such a bad boy , competitive , a little insecure occasionally , quiet at times , I approve Heajung! “

I punch him in the stomach lightly “ I don’t need your approval ! “

He tells me that he came immediately the moment he was done. I am thankful really because he cares. I know he can’t stay long and I enjoy the moments before a van stops at the back alley to get him and I probably won’t see him for awhile.

Yixing.

I laugh to myself at how ridiculous it really sounds. I’m two years older than him to get things started, I always knew that being with someone in their industry was looking for certain death. My point proven by my shop front.

________________________

Things are quiet for awhile, Yixing comes , Suho comes , then they go and they shop is empty as usual. That is till Yixing decides to barge in one day ,well night,  and drag me out , he lets me lock the door first but does not say anything. I’m dragged to a nearby park up the small hill from where my shop was. The benches lined the miniature slope and forces me to sit on one.

“ Will you talk now ?“ I ask.

I’m not a fan of unusual behavior.

“ Jungie. I..... “ his head turns slightly to the side and he looks at me at an odd angle.

I stare back and notice how the lamp post above made his short wavy hair slightly redder than it was suppose to be. It made his nose bridge sharper when it just grazed the tip of it.

“ Jungie , no , Heajung. “

The way he says my name instead of calling me Jungie is different but a nice kind of different.

“ If . . .  if I told you I loved you , would you hit me and run , or stay and think about it “

I obviously couldn’t run because I was stuck solid on to my chair. These words, did I hear them right , or had I gone crazy. I’m quiet because really no one has confessed like that , do direct and out of the blue.

“ Dammit I shouldn’t have listen to Jonghyun hyung when he said to be straight to the point “ he sighs and cradles his head in his palms .

“ Yixing , are you sure , do you know what you’re saying ? “ He must have been out of his mind.

“ Of course I know what I’m saying , do you ? “ His eyes meet mind , and I know he’s waiting for an answer.

“ Yixing , you’re a wonderful boy ...... “

“ I’m not just a boy who’ s in love with you Heajung, I’m a man who’s in love with you , I know what I’m feeling , I just..... I just need an answer before I drive my group mates insane”  

Then I looked at him completely differently. Its as if he changed in that split second. Maybe its the words he spoke , or the way his eyes held my gaze that I couldn’t tear away.

“ Yixing , I . . I’d love to give you the answer you want but firstly I’m not for dating famous people , secondly , I’ve never thought of you as anything else than a friend an . . .”

I can’t finish my sentence because he’s leaned forward to shut me up by brushing his lips on mine. I never knew younger boys to be so bold. Well you learn new things everyday.

“ You always talk to much Jungie” he mutters , the distance so close. “ too many excuses”

The only thing that comes to my head is smile, and not get lost in the feel and the warmth of his breath so close to me.

“ We can try , look at me like a man you’d want to be with and tell me after the end of this month whether you want us to be something more “

“ Please ? “

I just nod because how else do I tell him. He wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

He does small things for me , like bringing dinner on a cold night or walking me home when its dark. Things like bringing me to meet my favorite band , BIGBANG , everyone knows i’m just Suho’s best friend , so no questions asked. I was just lucky that the groups comeback was close enough to Big Bang. I hope I wasn’t swooning when I met T.O.P .

Suho said Yixing’s face turn green. Envy ? Maybe.

Its next week , he reminds me when we’re seated by the park down the road , my left hand in his coat pocket intertwined with his. He insists that I’m going to get sick , I tell him i just stand the cold really well.

“ Have you thought about it ? “ he asks staring at the lamp post across the path from us. I sense his fear in the question.

“ no “ because I want to be really honest.

There is this odd silence that fill the air , it speaks of whys and wants but I keep quiet next to him.
I feel his gaze on me and I don’t want to look back, afraid of what I might be getting myself into. His free hand reaches over to the side of my face. The warmth of his hand seeps through his fingers and into my skin , unknowingly i lean into his touch.

“ I love you “ he whispers “ and this has been the best two weeks of my life, your beautiful , determined , kind , selfless and a long endless list of things. No doubt your stubborn and grumpy at times , but you’re still someone who’s somehow manage to get a hold of me, I ..... i don’t know how to let you go now “

My eyes settle on his and I see the sincerity crying themselves pass his lids but he manages a smile , to lighten the pressure of making a decision now.  I still have no answer for my self or him, but I know that he’s someone I don’t want to loose. Love? I wasn’t sure if I simply treated him like a close younger brother. The night grew and I laid my head against his shoulder humming a small tune trying to see if it brought me somewhere , somewhere with decisions already made.

I don’t know when, but somewhere in between i had fallen asleep. I felt strong arms take me along somewhere, at least i knew it was safe.