#Taeyong

It was roughly midnight when I was standing outside of their room. Our manager called me to tell me they were conscious. I felt happy. They made it. But a part of me makes me all nervous. Will they welcome me like Yuta did?

I took a lifetime looking for answers in front of the door when a warm hand enveloped mine. She stood in front of me and the answer was right there.

"Let's go inside." She whispered as I gathered the courage to open the door.

"Hyung." I heard Winwin's voice echo in the silence of the room. I found him sitting on Taeil's bedside holding his hand.

"Winwin. How do you feel?" I said as I pat the boy's head gently. I could see the bruises have healed little by little.

"I'm fine." He said in broken Korean.

"How's Taeil hyung?"

"He's resting." He answered shortly while looking at the sleeping Taeil.

"Is he okay?" Before he could answer, someone entered the room.

"Why are you here?" Jaehyun said in obvious anger. "Why the hell are you here?!"

"Calm down, Jaehyun. This isn't the best time to fight." I said.

"Calm down? You want me to calm down when Jungwoo's still in danger, Yuta's in Japan, Winwin will be going to China tomorrow and Taeil hyung has been crying since he woke up? You want me to calm down?"

"What?"

"I… My parents… they want me back…in China." Winwin explained. "Taeil hyung…doesn't stop crying. They… had to inject him something…to calm him down."

My tears poured down without noticing it.

"And this all started because you left. Our first fan meeting since you left flopped. We can't even release any song because hell, you write all the songs we sing. Taeil hyung took all the burden on him." Jaehyun said and I noticed he too, was crying. "He hasn't stopped apologizing, saying he'd do better. He took it all hard. We were all having a hard time and where were you in all this?"

I couldn't answer that. I knew I couldn't answer that.

"You already left Lee Taeyong. I think it's best to keep it that way. Now, leave before I make another mistake of hurting you."

I looked at Winwin but he never met my eyes.

"Taeyong." I heard her voice but everything was blurry from all my tears. "Taeyong."

She pulled me out of the room and out of the hospital. I haven't stopped crying.

"It's my fault." I whispered as I hugged her. "It's all my fault.

"Let's go home first."

###

I wanted to scream. I wanted to let everything out but I know it's pointless. Sigma…will never be the same again.

I've read comments from people saying that what happened to Sigma was my fault. And little by little, I grew to believe them. If I hadn't left, if I wasn't so selfish, if I wasn't self-ce