It had been three months. Amber had called a few times and updated them on her ankle surgery, but she didn’t speak about much else. She never said when or if she was returning. Krystal hated performing without her. She missed traveling with Amber by her side, fighting over stupid things, holding her hand, and taking rare opportunities to cuddle by her side at night. She missed those moments most. 

“Thinking about Amber again?” SunYoung asked, touching her lightly on the shoulder. 

“Yeah,” Krystal sighed. “It’s been three months. Shouldn’t her ankle almost be better by now? Can’t she be here while it finishes healing.” 

SunYoung laughed. “I knew Amber was your favorite,” she mock pouted. “Next time you call her, make her tell you when she’s coming back. I miss my roommate.” 

“Ugh, she won’t confirm if she’s coming back no matter how much I beg. She’ll talk about anything except if she’s coming back or not.” 

SunYoung frowned worriedly. “Do you think…she left for good?” 

Krystal wanted to cry just hearing that out loud, but she refused to let it sink in. How could a crush just keep getting stronger? What if it was more than that? What if…

She shook her head. “I’m going to go to my room for a bit. Can you wake me up when it’s time for practice?” 

SunYoung nodded, now worried about the youngest band member. She’d known Amber and Krystal were close, but Krystal seemed so sad these days without her. 

She sat to watch a new drama, but a knock sounded on their dorm room door, pulling her out of the story. She got to her feet and answered, surprised to see one of their managers standing there with a man in a silver suit with a briefcase. 

“Hi, we wanted to ask you girls a few questions. This will be quick. Can you gather everyone?” 

“Uhh, only Krystal and Sulli are here with me now.” 

“That’ll be fine,” the manager said. 

They sat while SunYoung gathered Krystal and Sulli who squeezed together on the sofa across from the men. 

She wished Victoria were there with them. She felt too young to deal with this, though she was the oldest one there at only sixteen. 

“This man wants to ask you a few questions, so just be honest and everything will be fine.” 

They looked at one another nervously and reached for each other’s hands. 

The man in the silver suit pulled a sheaf of papers from his briefcase and a pen from his pocket. “Now, I don’t want to worry you girls. These are just a few questions, alright. Answer the best you can. No one is in trouble.” 

The girls all nodded. 

“Did Amber Liu seem troubled before she left?” 

They glanced at each other and shrugged. 

“Uhm…she seemed sad about something,” SunYoung said.

“Did she ever tell you, any of you, the nature of her troubles?” 

Sulli frowned. “Her ankle was damaged, maybe that’s why she was upset?”  

“She’s always just talk about wanting to go home and some mistake she made,” Krystal said. She chewed her bottom lip. “Is this to figure out if she can come back? We miss her, but she doesn’t talk about coming back.” 

The man in the silver suit looked at their manager who’d turned to the girls.

“Something like that. Thank you for being as helpful as you can. We’ll talk to Victoria.”

“Can you-,” Krystal called to them on their way out the door. “Can you tell us what’s going on?”

“Everything will be alright,” was the manager’s only response before leaving, taking the mysterious man with him. 

“What’s going on?” Sulli inquired, sounding scared. “Is Amber in trouble?”

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

“I wish you would’ve told me sooner,” Jackie said, hugging Amber against her chest. “And mom and dad.”

“But they wouldn’t let me go back if they knew,” Amber exclaimed. 

“You want to be back there after what happened?!”

“He’s being put away! He only t- he only tou-“

“You can barely say it. Why are you trying to trivialize it? What he did to you-“

“It doesn’t matter. I can get over it. I’m not going to let what he did ruin my dreams!”

Her sister looked at her imploringly. Amber knew she was barely holding back her anger. “Can’t you just try here?”

“And start from where?” Amber asked sarcastically. “You know how many struggling musicians live in this city alone? I’m already signed to a company in Korea with a chance to perform and gain fans and, maybe I’ll be struggling later, but at least I won’t be staring from nothing!”

“But-“

“You can’t talk me out of it,” Amber said, getting to her feet, wobbling on the crutches she was still forced to use. “I’m not going to be the scared Amber that I’ve always been. I’m going to find a way to become stronger. No one’s going to do anything like that to me again and some ert isn’t going to take my dreams and opportunities away from me!”

Her sister looked into the eyes, proud of the strength she saw there, but she couldn’t help but worry that her sister was trying to be strong prematurely. What if it only made her more fragile? 

She knew her sister to be stubborn though, so she just closed her eyes and held her close. 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

Amber sat in her room, surrounded by all her childhood things. It didn’t feel right being there. She scrunched herself into a spot on the floor between her bed and her nightstand, holding a stuffed bear to her chest. 

She would go back, but she couldn’t go back to those dorms. He might not be there anymore, but she didn’t want to think about the hallways he’d lead her down and the office…

She had a little money saved up from performing and she wondered if it was enough to move out on her own. It might be scary, but it wouldn’t be as scary as staying in LA feeling lost or going back to Korea and feeling suffocated in those dorms. 

Her phone rang, Krystal’s name visible on the screen. 

It would be 5am in Korea and she knew Krystal hated waking up early, but she did it so she could talk to Amber before their schedules got too heavy for the day. 

She answered, cradling the phone to her cheek. 

“I miss you. Are you coming back?”

Amber smiled. “Yeah.” Her grin could’ve split her face when Krystal screamed. “I need to get stronger, but I’m definitely coming back.”