the lost child
Found You in FragmentsRosé wonders what it feels like to be this loved by children. Her girlfriend is making funny faces to a baby, who returns her efforts with giggles and drools of laughter.
She remembers Wendy’s creased eyebrows and groans whenever her mother brings up the topic on the phone. She thinks it was heartless of her, reminding her own daughter about her biggest heartbreak. But seeing her now, like the countless times children approached her in public places, she finally understands how her girlfriend would make a wonderful mother.
She wants to talk about it. They’ve been dating for a little over a year, and she’s not sure if that’s already long enough for Wendy to believe her. She wants to tell her. She wants to assure Wendy that she is willing to do such lengths for her.
Rosé had tests taken. She had asked doctors and researched extensively on this topic. She is willing to carry a baby for Wendy, to start a family with Wendy. But a mere mention of “pregnancy” or “baby” makes her flinch away in an instant.
Finally, the child turns away from the woman when his mom feeds him food. Wendy turns her attention to Rosé. Her lips are still curled up in a smile.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
“You should have kids.” She regrets the words that flew from when her girlfriend visibly stiffens and shakes her head.
“You sound like my mother.”
Rosé clings to her arms and thinks about the next words to utter.
“I meant… We should have kids.”
---
Wendy had never asked Rosé to marry her. Not that she didn’t think about it. But, the two had acted way more than mere girlfriends and had such long-term plans that made marriage insignificant.
With Rosé, she felt alive again. Moving away from Canada and Seoul, it was difficult to pick up the pieces of her life again. She had been surviving for a few months with a new job in a new house, when she met Rosé on that fateful day.
Slowly, she found meaning in her life again. Rosé was young, vibrant, and happy. She was everything she’s not but it seemed like she was everything she needed.
“We could move abroad. We could go to your home in Canada. Or we could move to America. Wendy, I will stay with you.”
She remembers Rosé’s promise. Unlike her, Rosé made homes in people, not places. That night, she almost introduced her to her parents via skype. But like most of their calls, it ended in an argument and heartbreak. She never mentioned Rosé again, afraid that they wouldn't take their relationship seriously.
Rosé didn’t mind. If she did, she never showed it. And that’s why Wendy spent years with her life revolving around Rosé alone.
---
“When she left that night, it really felt like the last time.”
Wendy’s voice breaks but she doesn't cry. She coughs.
“I’m sorry to hear that.” Irene whispers. She’s cradling her tea in both of her hands, deep in thought.
Wendy chuckles. “I’m not. It hurt. A lot. But I had a wonderful time with her. Maybe we just weren’t meant to last.”
Irene admires Wendy most at this point. She has become so mature in life and she wonders what else she had gone through to get here. In between the lines of her story, Wendy sounded like she had been broken. It makes Irene wonder but she knows it would have to wait. It doesn't stop her from voicing out her deep resentment, surprising even herself.
“You revolved your life around her that you avoided everyone else.”
“Irene…” Wendy puts down her cup of tea and stands. Irene expected her to get angry and maybe kick her out of the apartment again. She remained sitting down, looking at the floor. Suddenly, Wendy kneels by her feet.
“I’m sorry.” Wendy apologizes as she looks at her. Irene was quick to answer.
“I’m sorry, too. She sounds amazing. Maybe she was too amazing that you disappeared from us. I thought we were close friends.”
She isn’t angry and she doesn't know where this was coming from. But, she rationalizes that she missed her friend all these years. She misses her friend who had gone through so much but didn’t make her a part of it.
“I know. We were.” Irene shakes her head to rid of the sudden surge of negative thoughts. “We are.” Wendy continues.
Irene knows it was unreasonable to pin the blame on a woman she had never met. Let alone someone who found her friend already broken.
She tries to change the topic to get away from the ruckus she caused. She looks around the living room space and sees the floral stationery tacked on the walls. It reminds her of the folded paper heart inside Wendy’s locker back when they were sophomores.
“Have you already liked women when we were in uni?”
Wendy looks surprised at the change but grateful, too. She nods. “Yeah, there were a few.” She looks down at her feet briefly before looking at Irene to explain another secret. “But I didn't think about pursuing them then. I thought it was just mere admiration.”
Irene thinks Wendy had plenty of admirers. It wasn’t hard to like her. She’s smart, caring, and kind. Talented, too. She could easily imagine Wendy as a girlfriend, then her thoughts ran wild and projected to view Wendy as her girlfriend. Irene felt heat creep up her cheeks as she wills to push the idea away. All of a sudden, she speaks up.
“I think I need to go home.”
She did. It was getting late. She already missed dinner and she promised Mina to tuck her in bed tonight.
Wendy looks disappointed for a second before she nods. They were already on their way out the door when Wendy tells her.
“We’ll have plenty more time to catch-up and I will never disappear like that again.”
It sounded like a promise.
---
PE was her last subject of the day so Jisoo let her classmates take a shower before her. When it was her turn, she spent longer than usual, letting the cold water cool off her raging thoughts. She would be walking home later with Jinyoung. No other plans. But, it pressured her somewhat to be more romantic, to act sweeter, like a good girlfriend should.
To her surprise, he was already waiting outside the shower room playing on his phone. He stood up when he saw her. He flashed his charismatic smile.
“Hi, Jisoo.”
She returned his smile and allowed him to take her hand.
“Hello.”
They stood there for what seemed like a minute. Jisoo could hear her heartbeat when Jinyoung inched closer, kissing her cheek.
“Let’s go?”
Jisoo nodded, walking home in silence as he let Jinyoung talk about his day.
---
Minhyuk is in high spirits today. During his usual walk with Sowon home, he learns that that the girl broke up with her baseball captain of a boyfriend.
“He’s too boring,” she says. It doesn't make him any better but noticing that Sowon still preferred to walk with him, this gives him hope.
To his delight, he finds Aunt Wendy in their house when he gets home. He finally has a chance to put his plans to action.
When his mother asks him about school, he pouts and pretends to complain about his class.
“It’s hard. I wish I could be better at speaking English.”
He’s been learning to act and make excuses from his sister Yeri. That girl almost always gets away with everything.
“I can tutor you.” Aunt Wendy pipes up, as expected, and his mother turns to her. “It’s no problem, Irene. I am an educator by profession. Plus, I am fluent in English.”
And that’s how he ends up on the dining table with his books and a skeptical Wendy beside him.
He learns the words “beautiful” and “funny” and “boyfriend material”. And quickly enough, vocabulary lessons turned into pronunciation.
To Aunt Wendy’s credit, she waits for his mother and sisters to leave the room before she asks.
“Is this for school or for someone in your class?” Her eyebrow is raised and Minhyuk is a bad liar so he gives in.
“It's for a girl. She’s older than me. She grew up abroad.”
The older woman turns her smile into a smirk.
“I’m flattered. But you know I’m as old as your mom, right?”
Minhyuk blushes furiously even as he denies it. He was so embar
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