Minseok’s POV

                I didn’t think I’d be waking up next to him for a long time. Not after how hard he’d been practicing and the preparations he’d gone over for months in advance. Now, it’s so unreal. Seeing him tangle in the covers beside me. Obviously trying to drain ever the last piece of sleep his body would allow him. Looking at the clock now, I see it’s 7 am. It’s unusual in a sense that it should be impossible for his trained mind to sleep past six.

                I knew I wouldn’t be leaving out for maybe an hour or so. It was an off day of sorts for me. Just going in a little later while Kyungsoo would open the shop for me. It’s silly that now that I’ve managed to drop in another hour of sleep, I’m wasting it staring at him.

                “You don’t have to go in, yet?” Lu’s voice startling me slightly. His eyes still closed and feigning sleep.

                “Not til around 9. I guess we could squeeze some breakfast in or whatever.” I moved to get up from the bed when I felt an arm wrap around me. Holding me tight to the soft surface.

                “Stay with me?” He asked. Eyes open but, still filled with hopes of slipping back into unconsciousness.

                “Sure, but only for a little while. I have to-“ He groaned loudly to cut me off.

                “Yeah, yeah. Just let me lay here with you in my arms for a little longer.” So, I laid back down. Not because I was still tired but, because I’d missed this. Maybe because this all felt like it was a lifetime ago. I’m happy to relive the past.

Lu Han’s POV

                When I woke up later, I noticed he’d slipped undetected from my arms. Probably shortly after I fell asleep. I know how much he loved to be on schedule. I got up slowly. My joints cracking and my muscles pulled in unimaginable ways. Surely, I’d been resting enough these few days. Why did I still feel that creak in my bones?

                I walked to the bathroom to catch a shower. Needing to rekindle that warmth I felt when we’d been close on the bed. Needing that feeling of loneliness to wash off me. I stripped and the shower. I let it wash over me slowly. Simply enjoying the steam and the faint smell of his shampoo.

                When we’d first met, I think that was one of the things, I fell in love with. The smell might have been overpowering to some but, his presence was overwhelming to me. That was just another part that was irreplaceable on his part. It differed from the women, whose arms I fell into when I was too far gone. Yes, I had my point of weakness every now and then, but none could replace him.

                I know it would hurt him. If he ever found out I’d been unfaithful. That my mind had blocked out all our history, our possible future, my vow,- for a 20 minute . The shame I felt was unbearable. However, I figured in my mind he’d be able to forgive me but, I never had the guts to say it out loud. Sure, it was easy to lie for a moment but, me with those other people didn’t match up to what we had. What we were losing.

                I stepped out and proceeded to go through my morning routine. Walking idly through the homey apartment before noticing the small plate on the stovetop. A covered plate of food and a note telling me to not ‘worry so much and rest up’. I’d craved this attention when I’d been gone. This hole he managed to fill. The place I’d been avoiding for so long.

                “How do you know what I need ?” I said to no one in particular and laughed a bit. I stared at the plate of food for a moment. How the could he be perfect for me and I’m so ing messed up and wrong for him? Why can’t I let go… so we can both get better? Would we even get better?

Minseok’s POV

                “So, he was at the ing house when you got there?” Jongdae asked. Business had slowed to a steady pace and I was able to catch my breath for a moment.

                “Yeah, I swear I almost threw up when I saw him. God, I felt terrible…”

                “Terrible because you got caught or terrible because he ruined your date.” I thought for a minute.

                “I won’t lie to you because at this point it’s futile. I felt terrible because of both reasons and everything in between. It did kind of me up for a minute or two.” I washed the espresso cup out. Sitting it on a small drying rack before just staring at it. God, I’m so out of it.

                “Maybe you need to just be up front and honest. Just say, ‘Hey, we can’t do this anymore and we need to see other people’. I know you're thinking it. You just have to say it.” He sounded a bit more forceful than usual. Probably sick of my antics. I would be too. We’re so repetitive and mopey I’d punch myself to get me out of this cycle.

                “I mean I’ve invested so much I this relationship. I can’t just drop this on him because I want some guy I’ve only been out with once. It’s not logical.”I huffed and to him, I must’ve looked completely childish.

“Has he invested as much in your relationship?”

                “What?”

                “God, you sound naïve and you’re older than me. Do you really think you’ve both been as celibate as Catholic nuns when you're apart? We work in a coffee shop. We see businessmen and overworked mothers in here on a daily. None of which are eye-catching!”

                “Yeah, but what does that-“

                “It means that while we have ahjussis hitting on you every which way, you don’t think an international popstar with millions of fans has slept with those scantily dressed groupies of his?! Can you honestly tell me he’s never done that?!” My cousin yelled. The soft chatter of the customers stopped. Kyungsoo’s head popped from the backroom. All eyes were on us.

“Do you think so little of me that I can’t tell someone’s infidelity?” I asked. Sure, I’d thought about it many times. Sure, I’ve probably been right. Then, again I didn’t want to be as low.

                “Wait, do you- has he been…”

                “Minseok-hyung, you’re here today? You don’t usually work on this day do you?” There’s a reminder of my chance to be just as low.

                “Sehun, you’ve got a coffee addiction and I should probably stop supporting it,” I called out to the approaching figure.

                “Ah, maybe I just have a Minseokie addiction. Eh?” He said, leaning over the counter. He’s beginning to get more comfortable. Flirting with me like this. Not that I mind him doing it.

                Jongdae looked at me. Heaven only knows what he’s thinking right now. Have I ever mentioned the cheating that was happening behind my back? Never, but it didn’t matter as much as now as I had Sehun in front of me. Telling me about his day. Lulling the paranoia and unworthiness into its depths again. I don’t have to sleep with him or entertain his advances, like I know some people would.

                Isn’t it just enough for me to enjoy his presence?

A/N- I wrote this story because I was sad that Lu Han left. Now, I feel like I’m writing him out the picture again.