EP15

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[Alexus’ POV]

 

“Haaah?!” I was so surprised; I was definitely taken aback by her words.

 

“I like you.” She said again, shyly. Then she looked away.

 

“Ever since we were in elementary, I have already liked you.” She said. “I’m just telling you now because I might not get another chance to tell you how I truly feel.”

 

“I know.. I’ve noticed.” I told her. I know and I am aware that Johani really liked me. She was obvious sometimes. She would tell me randomly that she loves me, in a jokingly manner, though. But I was aware of her feelings. But, I just couldn’t return them. “But, no matter how I look at it, you are just a friend to me.”

 

“Yeah, I know. So, you fell for my bestfriend instead.” She said.

 

“I didn’t like her at first.” I confessed. Bellona was interesting. But I never liked her at first. I only learned to love her along the way. Yes, our relationship was sudden. I yhink it was more of attraction that made me ask her out. I was just attracted to her. Yes, now that I realized it, that was just the reason.

 

“I see.” She muttered. “But you did love her though.”

 

“I did.”

 

Johani laughed. “Remember that time when the first girl who came up to you to confess had no idea you and Bellona were actually seeing each other and you just lead her on without even intending to?”

 

Ah, very embarrassing. “Yeah, it happened several times.”

 

“Yeah, with different girls.” She laughed. “Bellona was so angry. It happened again and again.”

 

“I did my best to change. I stopped doing it, but we both got tired of each other.”

 

“Hahaha, yeah...” she sighed. “It was good to be together again with the class.”

 

“Yeah, I’m glad I came along.”

 

“By the way.” She said. “I confessed to you so I will have no more hard feelings. And I didn’t want to have anything else to think about. If you like someone, tell that person. There’s no need to complicate life. If you get rejected, just cry it out and get over it. If that person accepts your feelings, then it’s good.”

 

I didn’t know what to say to that. She was right about it, though.

 

[switch]

Our house is old. It’s been here even before I was born, even before my parents were born. My grandfather is a native Japanese. He’s from Kobe. He used to be a calligraphy artist, then he started out collecting art. The hallways of our house are lined with his works. He was so fond of scenic paintings. He earned lots from his paintings. He even taught art majors in a university.

 

This house has seen so many generations of our family.

 

And now that my brother is getting married, we’ll have another member in the family.

 

Hannah is an engineer of a bottling factory. My brother works at the control tower at the airport. They met at a seminar. They are both Electronics Engineers.

 

I love my brother so much. He taught me so many things. Because of him, I learned how to make robots and learned to love them. It became my passion.

 

My grandfather on the other hand praised me for my skills in painting. He wanted me to learn calligraphy in Tokyo.

 

My brother and grandfather fought one day when I was about to graduate in high school.

 

In the end, my parents let me decide. I wanted to continue with the robots. I wanted to learn as much as I can. I wanted to create helpful robots.

 

My grandfather wasn’t pleased. But I still continued to paint and send him watercolour pieces of places I like in this university. They’re like postcards.

 

It’s funny because I was just here in Hapburn and my house was just in the city proper. But we send paintings to each other like we’re living in different countries.

 

The only person I ever liked was Seth.

 

But seeing Hannah and Lester one day at the family dinner, I realized, I just liked him because I was always with him.

 

I asked myself did I really love him?

 

My answer? I didn’t. I just liked him.

 

One day, Hannah took me out to go shopping with her. Brianne was too busy to go with us since she was doing an auditing. She’s a CPA, so she’s mostly busy with calculations.

 

After two hours of browsing different shops for the perfect wedding shoes, Hannah decided to treat me at Pancake House.

 

I love pancakes! I don’t know how she knew that. Maybe Lester told her?

 

“How did you know I love pancakes?” I asked her.

 

“I wanted to get along with you so I asked your brother about the things you like. It turns out you like to eat sweets too.” She said.

 

“Aww, I already liked you even before I met you. Onii-sama has good senses. He has never had a girlfriend because his standards are too high and he’s traumatized by Brianne’s so many break-ups. I knew then that if he falls for someone,this girl will probably be ‘the one’.”  I told her.

 

“Ah, you’re not flattering me, are you?” She asks me.

 

“Of course not! I’m being honest, really.” I say.

 

“You mentioned Brianne had so many break-ups? Why do you say so?” she laughed.

 

“She liked to test guys. If that guy can meet her standards then she goes on with seeing that guy. Once he fails, she breaks up with them. Onii-sama and Nee-chan are both the same. Their standards are too high. But their dating style is completely the opposite.” I say.

 

“Ahh... Sou. What about you Arin-chan? Are you seeing someone?” she asked.

 

It was so sudden that I coughed. “Nani?! Hahaha, nai, nai.”

 

“Really?” she said. “You’re so cute, you know! Doesn’t anyone like you?”

 

I almost choked on my pancake. “Nai. No one has ever confessed to me.”

 

“Hmmm,” was all Hannah said.

 

Just then, the couple at the next table started flirting.

 

“Give me some. Aaaah...” the guy opened his mouth.

“Heeheehee! Here you go! Aaaah...!” his girlfriend put a slice of pancake in his mouth.

 

Then he pinched her cheek and she blushed.

 

“Haaah. They’re so in love they can’t contain it.” I muttered without intending to.

 

Hannah heard me. She said in response, “Ah, that’s just showing off. Couples who show off won’t last long.” She said. And she directed those words to the couple.

 

Yabai! Did she just say it in their faces?!

 

“Ah! Hannah Cheng!” the girl said.

 

Yabai! They know each other?! Sugoi! a small world.

 

“That girl was my bestfriend, and that guy used to be my fiancé.” Hannah whispered to me.

 

“Yahoo...” Hannah waved at them.

 

“I see you’re still single.” The guy said. “Still can’t get over it? It was three years ago.”

 

“Yeah,” his girlfriend seconded. “You didn’t have to be bitter towards us.”

 

“Ah, I wasn’t bitter.” Hannah laughed. “I was pissed off because you never noticed I was here too. Geez get a room, you’re both an eyesore to all the singles here.”

 

“Why don’t you just get a boyfriend and be the envy of all the other singles out there instead of getting envious with us.” She pouted.

 

Hannah laughed. She suddenly showed them her ring finger where she put on the engagement ring. “I’m getting married on the twenty-ninth. This girl here is my fiancé’s younger sister.”

 

“OMG! Is that true?!” The girl quickly stood up and pored over Hannah’s ring. “Congratulations! You never said anything to me! How could you!”

 

“Well, I wanted to give you the invitation card when I saw you in the store, but you two are so busy getting all lovey-dovey.” Hannah sulked. Her friend gave her a hug. “You’ll be my maid of honor. I don’t have a sister, you know.”

 

“Really?! Waaaah!”

 

“Wow, what does your fiancé do?” The guy asked.

 

“He works at the airport’s control tower.” Hannah said.

 

It was fun watching them reminisce of their past mistakes and how they let bygones be bygones. Just like me and Seth. Let bygones be bygones.

 

It turns out during their college days, they had a huge misunderstanding. Her bestfriend and her then fiancé got involved into falling for each other and couldn’t help it. Her friend even said how amazing Hannah was that time because she never threw a fit after she found out.

 

She said, she was already not sure if she’d be happy with that guy. So, she let them be. She wanted to be single and to be able to find the right things that will make her happy.

 

Wow, I wish I was as brave as Hannah. Will I be able to let go of things that don’t matter?

 

She’s strong.

 

The weakest part of being human is that we tend to savour and cling to pain more than to let go and free ourselves from it. I couldn’t even understand why. People really tend to complicate life. Is it in our genes as human beings? Or are we all just naturally stupid in just different levels from each other?

 

Whatever the case was, it was still confusing. Feelings are not so hard to understand. It’s denying it that makes things complicated. What we want to do collides with the things we should do. And these complicated things give life its colors.

 

While in the car ride on our way back home, I suddenly had this curiosity.

 

“Hannah-nee.”

 

“Nani, Arin-chan?”

 

“About your remark earlier, that thing you said about couples who show off... Did you really mean it?” I asked.

 

Hannah gave me a glance then said, “Yeah, I do.”

 

“Why do you say so?”

 

“You see, Arin-chan.” She began. “Love should come naturally. You don’t need to have pet names to be in love. You don’t need to hold hands in public to be in love. You don’t have to post selfies to show you’re both in love. Do you get what I mean?”

 

“I think so...”

 

“All those aren’t really necessary. When your brother introduced me to you and the rest of the family, everyone was surprised, right?” She laughed.

 

“Yeah, we were.” I say. “He never said you were his girlfriend. But he did say he was dating someone.” He just doesn’t advertise it. He would talk about it whenever it’s talked about, but he wouldn’t just say it randomly.

 

“We have this keep-it-private-but-not-a-secret thing about relationships.” She says. “That way, you can learn to be faithful and to trust your partner.

 

“Hmm, you’re right.” I have zero experience in relationships. So, I really don’t know what to say to that. But she does have a point there.

 

When the car turned a corner that leads to our street, Hannah said all of a sudden, “How old are you?”

 

“I just turned eighteen.” I answered.

 

“I see...” she says. “Well, it’s normal for teenagers to be interested in romance after all.”

 

Huh?

 

“But if you get too picky, you won’t find someone to date.” She laughed. “Ah... Dating during your teenage years is actually a bumpy ride. If you’re taking it seriously, I can say you’re quite mature to think of dating as not a need, but something special.”

 

I didn’t quite get what she said, though.

 

All this talk about romance started when I became curious about Hannah and Lester’s relationship.

 

They weren’t showy, but they were happy. They don’t see each other every day, yet they’re so in love. They don’t get to do a lot of things together, yet they are so fond of each other. I kinda envy that. But, it looks so cute.

 

I wonder what kind of love I will land myself into.

 

[snip]