CHAPTER X

**YUNA**

I tapped my foot gently on the floor of our living room as I waited for Jungkook to come and pick me up. I was supposed to meet him at Eunha’s place but being the boyfriend that he is, he insisted that I ride with him, saying something about alone time as if we already don’t have much of it, which we probably do.

I heaved a deep breath. I don’t know what is up with me lately but every time I drift off to think, my mind would always pull me toward those negative thoughts, most referring to my current romantic relationship and it’s getting on my nerves, not because I feel so pessimistic but because it’s like I’m slowly acknowledging all these ideas going around my head. It’s like I’m being pulled to agree and I don’t even know why or how. It’s scary once I think about it. I can’t imagine myself ending everything I have with Jungkook just because something in my mind that I’m not sure of is telling me so.

Leisurely, I took deep and calming breaths to relieve my nerves. I can’t let this get to me now.

“Yuna? Are you okay?”

It was Jungkook’s voice, filled with sincere concern, that brought me back to my senses. I felt like tearing up. I didn’t want to lose to my depressed self.

I looked up from my seat to meet his gaze as he walked toward me in a rush. His face was the only thing I see right now and seeing how he worries so much about me without even knowing the reason behind my pain makes me want to open myself up to him. I want to tell him everything, every single detail that is running through my head. I want him to understand. I want to know what he’d think, how he’d feel and yet I can’t. I can’t bring myself utter even just a single word about what I’m feeling. Every time I try to talk to him, my mind just shuts down and my mouth becomes so dry, unable to form the words I wanted to say. I need help but I know right now, I’m the only one who can help myself.

“Yuna?”

I must have zoned out for a moment because when I snapped back to reality, Jungkook was already there, crouching down to meet me at eye level. He was deeply concerned and it hurts. It hurts how good he is to me considering I’m being like this to him- like an awful girlfriend who don’t know the meaning behind the word trust.

“I-I’m fine,” I lied as I gently removed his arms from my shoulder. “I was just thinking about something.”

In my mind, I wanted Jungkook to ask me, to convince me to tell him everything but I know him well enough to respect my privacy. I know he’s not going to pry if I show him that I’m in no mood to tell. Why does it have to be like this? Why can’t we just meet at the same end? We’re always together but I feel like I’m a mile apart whenever this anxiousness kicks in.

“We could work on your report here if you want. I could call Eunha and tell her you’re not feeling too good to leave home. Would you like that?” he suggested as he my hair like I’m a precious porcelain doll, at risk of breaking.

I shook my head. Some company other than ourselves would be helpful for me. That way, I could get my thoughts distracted. “It’s okay. I’m fine. Let’s go. Eunha’s probably waiting.”

I knew Jungkook was hesitant to agree based on the shifting of his expressions but for him, what I want is what he’ll follow. This makes me even mad at myself for doubting such a kind and loving boy like him.

“If you say so but if ever you feel sick, tell me and I’ll take you home as soon as possible. Okay?”

I bobbed my head as Jungkook offered a hand to help me stand up, which I gladly accepted. I gave him a smile and I’m not sure anymore if it’s genuine or not but he accepted it anyway as he returned with a grin.

“You look pretty today, by the way. Have I told you that?” he whispered to my ear as soon as we went out of the door, making our way to his car.

I smacked him lightly on the arm and let out a low chuckle. “You tell me that every day.”

“I do?”

I nodded.

“Well, then, you need to get used to it because I’ll be doing that for the rest of the days to come.”

It was the first time today that I felt glad inside. It was nice to hear those words coming from him no matter how cheesy it was. He always has this ability to make me forget all my worries and remind me that amidst all these conflicts I have with myself, there’s still him, ready to make my day.

“So, I guess I’ll be looking forward for that same line tomorrow.”

I don’t understand what’s funny with what I said but after I spoke, Jungkook burst in a hearty laugh, clutching his stomach in the process.

“It’s not meant to be a joke. Why are you laughing?” I pouted as I hit him multiple times in the chest to stop him from laughing but it seemed to have taken no toll on him.

A minute passed and he finally calmed down, chuckling a bit here and there as he wiped some of the tears that formed in his eyes from the laughter.

“I am supposed to be your clown now?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.

“No,” he replied and I arched my brow at him, begging for a proper explanation. He exhaled deeply before beginning to speak. “You just make me so happy in the littlest of ways that I can’t help but laugh at myself.”

“And you’re telling me that’s the truth?”

He leaned closer to my face and give my lips a light peck. “Why can’t it be? I am madly in love with you enough for it to be real.”

I blushed and shied a little away from him. He’s giving me the butterflies again and he doesn’t even know how much my head is spinning right now. I was left speechless. How am I supposed to reply?

He must have noticed how awkward I got that he decided to drop the topic as he pat me gently on the head before walking ahead toward the car. “Let’s hurry. We don’t want Eunha killing us for being late.”

I nodded but he was already a few feet away from me to see me do so. I clutched my chest tightly as the pessimism began coming back to me again. Why can’t I no longer have sweet moments with Jungkook without them being short-lived? But that’s not my bigger concern. What my mind is thinking more about is why I couldn’t bring myself to return the words ‘I love you’ to him- why I can’t say them out loud like I used to before.

It pains me to think about it and it kills me to see that look of disappointment on Jungkook’s face when I didn’t voice out the words he wanted to hear- the words he deserved.

**YERIN**

I awoke to the sound of my doorbell ringing. Whoever it is must be someone persistent. The annoying sound has been going off for a few minutes now and even covering my ears with my pillow isn’t helping at all.

I groaned as I rolled on my bed and when I fluttered my eyes, a beam of sunlight greeted me. I almost forgot I had the curtains drawn last night before going to bed since I reckoned the view out the window could help me feel more at ease amidst the entirely new homey environment.

“I want to sleep more,” I muttered, rolling on my belly. “Shut up.”

The doorbell continued to buzz as I struggled to get back to my sleep. I was having such a good dream when some stupid person, who doesn’t know respect, came to wake me up. And there I thought I could live in that dream filled with sweets and chocolates forever. So much for getting my hopes up…

Another continuous buzzing echoed across my entire apartment and it was enough to annoy me to the extent that I really got up from bed, prepared to pay the jerk a lesson for waking me up.

“You better plead for your life,” I mumbled while making my way down the stairs as the doorbell continued to ring.

I cursed under my breath before unlocking the door to reveal whoever the bothersome person is.

“What took you so…wait. Did you just get up from bed?”

Oh, it’s him. Why am I not even a bit surprised? Of course, he is the only person who could be that annoying.

I rolled my eyes at Taehyung as he looked at me from head to toe. Yes, I am not the most appealing person out of bed early in the morning but he could have left out the part where he threw me a disgusted look. I’m still a girl who gets conscious about my looks too in case he doesn’t know.

“Is something wrong with that? A woman needs her beauty sleep.”

“You’re not even that beautiful,” he whispered to himself but I have excellent hearing, enough for his words to reach me.

“What was that?!” This jerk really knows how to get in my nerves and he’s not even trying hard.

“I said let me in,” he stated as he shoved me aside to let himself in and I regretted not closing the door in his face the moment I had the chance. Now my home’s infiltrated by some annoying brat.

“Oh, please do make yourself feel at home,” I said with sarcasm while I followed him as he made his way to the large couch situated at the center of the huge living room.

He took a seat like the boss he thinks he is and looked at me, eyes narrowed. “It’s part of your duty to get ready before I come to pick you up.”

Oh, really? I don’t remember you telling me that.” I crossed my arms over my chest and stood with my weight on one foot as I held my chin up to challenge him.

“It’s in the contract.”

And in just a matter of second, I felt my braveness waver. I did not see that coming.