He is too pure
for this wicked world
but mortals know not-
For they are all blind
to the unpolished beauty
in front of them.
“Do you remember when I had first …kidnapped you and threw you onto the ship?” He asks looking at me, his eyes regretful. I nodded not really wanting to think about those terrible moments, “I was apprehended by the police. They recognized me and took me as prisoner.” I look up at him, surprised by that piece of information.
“But I don’t know what happened because they released me and told me to come to this island or else they will kill me. I tried to tell them about you but they wouldn’t listen so you had to suffer. By the time we reached you were nearly dead. I was so scared I killed you as well.”
“Back then you were nothing but a stranger who I had taken advantage of but believe me when I say that I really wished it never happened.”
I believed him. I had already forgiven him for all that he had done. He did not exactly wish to be in such a situation did he?
“It’s okay. I survived, did I not?” I smiled at him then pointed at his plate of shrimp which we were having for dinner. He picked up a piece but gave me an expectant gaze as if he was waiting for me to say something else.
“What?” I asked, a little amused.
He says nothing, going pink in the face and continuing to eat his food.
This little baby was supposedly a criminal. This boy who would rather have his hands burnt than see someone hungry, or go fishing although there seemed to be no possible way of catching any and even risking his life to save someone else’s.
“What?” It was his turn to ask since I was staring at him.
I laughed, forgetting the pain and reality for a moment, or the fact that we talk about crimes so lightly.
“What?” He asks again, fidgety.
“You, Mister Byun Baekhyun are the cutest human I have encountered so far.”
* * *
There was a sudden tug in my heart followed by a painful clench. I had been teaching the kids on one of the porches of their homes. Nothing was out of ordinary but my heart refused to calm down.
“Kids,” all of them looked up at me from their notebooks, “I know we still have to sit for sometime but I don’t feel well today so I have to call it a day. The work that I assign to you will be your homework.”
The kids responded, some squealing in delight as they packed up and scattered around quickly. I climbed up the slope quickly but noticed that no one was at home. I knew where he would be. My feet took me quickly to the gulf.
My heart seemed to stop once I reached. He was sitting next to Grandpa’s boat with tools around him, a few feet away from his grave. He was repairing the boat. But what caught my heart was his shaking shoulders and his hands on his face. He was crying.
My lips immediately trembled, my nose stung and my breath became erratic. He had lost someone who is the closest father figure he has ever had.
I went over to him and hugged him from behind. He stiffened at the contact but relaxed a moment later. He turned around and my heart went into a frenzy. There were tears staining his beautiful face. I cried with him as he hugs me tightly. Aren’t we both so pitiful?
“Why do I lose everyone? I wish I can at least have you.” He said after a long time. My stomach did a flip and my brain went into overdrive but there was more guilt in there than anything else.
“But you have me,” I said, my hands cradling his face, “You have me as long as I stay here.”
He says nothing after that, just looking at me with his glossy eyes.
“Why can’t I have been born differently? Why did fate do this…?”
My heart felt as though there was a constant pricking of tiny needles all over. Why are you so unfortunate, you quiet and demure human? Why could the gods not have any pity over you adorable being, someone who hides his sadness so that he could make someone else feel better?
Without voicing any of my thoughts I leaned down and kissed him on his lips, as softly as possible to show him my care, my love and my pain to him.
“Let’s pray that we meet in the next life when we are both very normal, very lively and leading beautiful lives.”
We both sat there leaning against the boat staring at the ocean. The gulf was completely different now. There were no longer any trees, each one fell, the flowers were completely destroyed and the water was no longer calm.
Did the gulf know that it’s caretaker had gone?
* * *
“Baek,” our boat rocked us gently as we sailed out into the ocean, “One day I am going to return to this place and then I will always be by your side. We can go boating like this all the time and maybe we can even go pearl fishing. Then we will go play on the beach and watch the sun set on our porch.”
He was looking at me as though I might disappear if he blinked a second too long. It took so much will power not to go over and hug him until he becomes the happy puppy he had become.
“Let’s do that then,” He smiles a sad smile, “I’ll be waiting… Even if takes my whole life.”
We became quiet as we usually do when we wanted to ponder over things.
“We’re being dramatic aren’t we?” I said with a hollow laugh.
“You could say that.” He returns my chuckle with a smile that was more heartbreaking than beautiful.
* * *
It’s been four months since I’ve come here and so much has happened to me. Things changed, for good and for bad. Things have become almost normal and I was more or less getting out of the depression phase quicker.
But everything I did included Baekhyun and that was why I look forward to every morning, every day. He liked being close to me. He did not establish too much skin ship with me but every now and then he would hold my hand or lean close to me or hug me.
I liked it; it was a remainder that some things were normal and natural. Maybe we loved each other or maybe it was something else but whatever it was we were not afraid to show it because it wasn’t going to last. We were savoring each other’s presence while we can.
Our end was inevitable. It was pronounced from the beginning. But why couldn’t something happen, like a massive turn of events and change our destiny?
Every single tim