Follow That Red Thread Home ch 6

If you want to forget something or someone, never hate it, or never hate him/her. Everything and everyone that you hate is engraved upon your heart; if you want to let go of something, if you want to forget, you cannot hate. - Sophie

Joshua was lucky enough to live near enough campus he could go home for his rather long break before his night class at six. And after seeing Jeonghan and having him try to chat Joshua up; he needed time alone. Somewhere safe, away from his beloved work place. Joshua didn’t think he’d ever feel safe there anymore. Not if Jeonghan was working there.

The entire car ride home Niko was quiet like a mouse. Something unusual for him. Considering Joshua’s current state of mind though, he likely stayed quiet out of worry. Joshua was grateful. If Niko chatted he would bring up Jeonghan. The demon cat was always curious about Joshua’s past and the promise that he made and broke only for another promise to be made in exchange.

Joshua only ever told him the bare minimum. Every time he even spoke parts of his memories out loud his throat would close and he felt that deep ache that never seemed to go away. It held onto him like a vice, scarring his heart beyond repair no matter how many lifetimes he had lived with without Jeonghan in his life to scar it further. Time was supposed to heal all wounds. But Joshua found not even all the time he had ever lived healed his.

Wounds scabbed over time and a person would get over them. Every once in a while, perhaps pick at them to let them bleed a bit while reminiscing. Joshua wanted to say his scabbed over. But they hadn’t. The many lifetimes of rejection had cut the wound open time and time again. Each time Jeonghan left him or didn’t want him. It cut him deep and time seemed to do nothing for it.

Joshua tried to find other lovers, other people who would love him and that he could love in return. For healing. For himself. Even if Joshua healed it with someone else who loved him, cared for him. But he kept a part of himself from them. Left that bleeding wound away from their hands. Because while he loved them, a part of Joshua would always love Jeonghan just a bit even if he hated him.

“Shua,” Niko said, butting his head into Joshua’s arm, “we’re home.”

Blinking Joshua stared at his driveway and the walls of brick and the spires of the house that reminded him of castles and old memories. “We are,” he said quietly. “Let’s go inside.”

He walked slowly, as if in a trance and everything was foggy. Class was a bit of a blur and he thanked that it was the first day and his lessons never changed. But the night class was something mildly new and he needed to be on top of it. Several of his students would be back for that class and he couldn’t show them how shaken he still was.

Silently he let Niko and himself in to the house. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of calming draught. Biting his lip, he walked up the stairs to second floor, Niko following at his heels. He’d take a bit. If he really needed it. Only if he needed it.

Joshua put the bottle on his study table before leaving and going into the attic.

“What are you looking for Joshua?” Niko swished his tail and twitched his nose at the dust that moved as Joshua shoved boxes and lifted until he found the one he was looking for.

“The box,” he muttered. He rummaged around some more. He remembered going to get it when he turned twenty, ready to deal with the pain and living away from his family. It was still in the same place as his last lifetime had put it away, in the magic bank under lock and key. Every lifetime Joshua went to put it back in that box and the key handed to the workers under strict rules to scan for his soul. Only if it matched were they to hand over the key.

His eyes lit up as he found it. It was small but full of things that he hated to be reminded of, yet he always took it out of the bank each lifetime to add something new into it. And to remind him of the mistakes he would always regret. He never wanted to make the same one again.

Picking it up he turned to Niko with a sad smile, “I think it’s time to tell you the story. The lifetime that started it all.”

The two of them settled on the rug in front of the fireplace in Joshua’s study.

Opening the box Joshua closed his eyes in pain.

Niko mrowed, extremely worried. “Joshua?”

He gave Niko a tremulous smile. Gently he took out a ribbon. One that should’ve disintegrated with time, the woven fabric fallen to pieces and the vibrant sky blue color dead. But it was still in good condition, stopped in that moment of time many centuries ago.

Holding it out to Niko he said, “This,” his voice choked up, “this was a token, I guess, of the start of our relationship. Not the very first one. But the one that mattered the most in some ways.”

Niko moved close, snuggling up to Joshua in a bid to comfort him.

Eyes losing their focus Joshua started to lose himself in the memories. “We met when I was working as an apprentice to a wizard during my time at school.”

The room around them shifted, Joshua’s magic working to set the scene, using his memories to bring forth it all.

Joshua yawned as the day waned. It was long and the shop hadn’t seen many customers. A slow day it seemed. Soon he’d be able to close the shop and his master, Pirnk, would show Joshua things that the school wasn’t teaching him. Spells, magic, and history that would help him gain his wizarding license and he’d go back to home to his family mansion and live a quiet life of a small time noble with magic.

He leaned his hand, elbow on the counter when the bell rang above the door, signaling a customer.

“Hello,” Joshua called, sweeping his arm off the counter, the sleeve picking up some minor dust, “how may I help you today?”

A well off young man, similar to Joshua’s age walked in, hair flowing freely.

Joshua blinked in surprise. One of those nobles who took up the newer styles. His hair was long, longer than his shoulder and dyed. It was a bright blond not often found in these parts. Joshua knew that. He had been on a few journeys with his master to other parts of the land and remembered spending time in an area where most were blond and blue eyed. But considering the type of elves they were it wasn’t a surprise but to see that color on a human.

The young man placed, nearly slammed a black satin ribbon on the counter. In a rather demanding voice he asked, “Can you make this stay? And not break.”

“Stay?” Joshua asked a bit bewildered.

He held up his hair. “Make it stay in the bow I tie. Like a charm that makes sure every time I tie it, it doesn’t loosen. I’m getting tired of it.”

Nodding slowly Joshua said, “I can. But wouldn’t it be easier to simply cut your hair?”

Smirking at Joshua he leaned in close, making Joshua pull back before he got too close. He blinked at Joshua, nearly…flirting with his eyes and the way his lips pulled into a leer as he looked Joshua up and down. “I would but the hair attracts people and I don’t mind the cost.”

Joshua almost sneered back at him. But he kept his temper in check. Flirty rich noblemen weren’t his problem, they paid ridiculous amounts of things after all.  “It wouldn’t be a charm sir. It would be a spell and it might cost more than you’d be willing.”

Still smiling at Joshua, he waved his hand. “Money is no object. I’ve plenty. Can you do it?”

“Of course,” Joshua replied. “May I see it?”

He took his hand off the ribbon, allowing Joshua to pick it up. Joshua looked at his and nodded. “A spell that you’re asking for costs about 15 gold coins. And it won’t be permanent as the material of this ribbon is too,” he paused, “flimsy for holding magic. But it would last quite a while still. Is that fine with you sir?”

He stared at Joshua, nearly unnerving him with the quiet analyzation. But Joshua didn’t look away. He hated people like him. So, he stared back, taking in his blond dyed hair and the sharpness of his cheekbones and the tip of his nose, the straightness of his nose bridge and the clean shape of his chin and jaw. Handsome enough. Rich as well. Joshua held back his snort at the ridiculousness that made this person keep such annoying long hair, even with a face like that and riches it seemed to be able to throw it away on such a stupid thing.

“That’s fine,” he declared looking away from Joshua. “I can always come back with other ribbons that might hold spells longer I suppose.”

Joshua nodded. “Please step back. I don’t want stray magic to accidentally come at you.”

Moving a few steps back from the counter he stared still. Curious no doubt at what Joshua meant, but he owed him no explanation.

He held it in his hands, concentrating on what he wanted. Weaving magic between the thread Joshua whispered words of strength and bonding. Magic words that worked like glue, cementing the threads together in the way the rich young lord wanted. Ignoring the gasp a few paces away, Joshua placed it on the counter, tying it in a bow before whispering magic into the shape, willing it to keep that shape for as long as the thread would hold. As he felt the magic take, Joshua blinked, closing his eyes briefly.

Looking up the rich young lord had a stunned expression on his face. Joshua assumed he simply hadn’t seen magic being worked in front of him before. He held up the ribbon as it fell out of its tied shape unnaturally. “It’s done. 15 gold pieces please.”

“Do your eyes always glow when you do magic?” He asked, voice clear with excitement.

Joshua nodded slowly. “Most magic users’ eyes glow. Especially if they’re human. But your ribbon sir.” Joshua held it out.

“The name is Jeonghan. Jeonghan of the Yoon family.” He told it to Joshua as it was supposed to mean something. Like it held some sort of weight.

Unfortunately, it did. The Yoon family was leagues above Joshua’s own family small holding at the foot of the mountains. Rich and close to the crown. It meant a lot in the world of nobles and peasants. But nothing to Joshua. He had no interest in other nobles like Jeonghan. Not when they were the ones with more riches and higher statuses spitting at the feet of lower class nobles like Joshua or peasants when they outclassed them in class, their magic mediocre and holding none of the fire that burned within, their talent a small fire in the howling wind.

“Well, Lord Yoon, your ribbon. 15 gold pieces.” Joshua said this, evenly, politely, coldly.

It seemed to spark a sparkle in Jeonghan’s eyes. He counted out 15 gold pieces, sliding them over to Joshua. Joshua, about to let the ribbon fall into Jeonghan’s hand, felt his hand touched by Jeonghan’s fingers as he slid them across Joshua’s palm to get his newly spelled ribbon.

Joshua pulled away quickly, like he had been burnt. Clutching his hand to his chest, he clenched his jaw as Jeonghan chuckled at his scandalized expression. “Thank you?”

He would’ve loved to not give Jeonghan his name but he had too. “Joshua.”

Jeonghan smiled at him. “Thank you, Joshua. I’ll be back with other ribbons and some friends. They wanted some spells to be done themselves and considering your work,” he said as he tied his hair, his shirt riding up slightly, showing Joshua a smooth, slightly muscled stomach.

Shaking his head, he grinned ecstatically as it held its place. “Perfect. I’ll be back soon.” Winking at Joshua he walked out, but nothing without leaving a parting message. “Don’t miss me too much.”

As the door closed on him, Joshua snorted out loud. “I won’t miss you one iota. Stupid rich noblemen.”

Collecting the payment, Joshua counted them and slid them into the till, the magic closing around it as the total magically shifted to show the day’s earnings. His master would be happy with the amount. He’d no doubt ruffle Joshua’s hair like his father did and tell him he had done a good job. Then he’d show Joshua more wondrous magic, taking his mind off that flirtatious smile and wink.

next chapter will be flashback mostly too