Hi everyone I'm so sorry for not updating this story in what seems like forever but I have ben busy revising for my GCSE's which start on soon. I hope you can all take this chapter as my appology, I wrote this x reader when I had a small bit of spare time outside of revising so I hope you all enjoy. From the 16th of June I should be updating all the x reader stories on my account and starting new ones so please look foreward to it and enjoy this chapter - Hayley

Solji, well you missed her, since she had become sick you had seen her less than you would have when she was doing her comeback. Since she got sick and sick beyond her will, she had been feeling incapable because she wasn’t with her girls and she couldn’t be there for you when you needed her.

It was hard being an idol and dating another one with the public and media knowing. The media had always discretely suspected you where gay but when you came out, later announcing you were dating Exid’s oldest ember Solji everyone embraced you two with open arms, the occasional hate comment here and there but Koreas society was moving on, they were becoming more open towards same relationships. But since you were dating Solji and she wasn’t in the public eye anymore you were always asked questions about her, if she was ok, when would she be better, but you couldn’t answer them. Telling them lies you told yourself.

Solji had blocked you out, stopped texting you, visiting you at odd hours. But you knew you needed to make the effort to make her feel better if only mentally. You’d text her ‘Good morning’ and ‘goodnight’ with the occasional question and how you were doing just so she knew you were ok and that you still cared and that you would always worry about her.

You were getting your hair and makeup done for your next schedule which was happy together. As you met up with the rest of the guests and the MC’s no one spoke of Solji so you hoped today was going to be a day without questions but that would probably be short lived.

“So (y/n), I know you get constant questions about Solji’s health but how are you feeling about the whole situation.” Jae Suk asked, the question caught you by surprise and you didn’t really know how to answer it.
“Well uhm… since Solji has become sick we’ve been seeing each other a lot less, she has been in the hospital every other day for treatment so it’s hard to find time to spend with each other. We still message each other and talk over the phone but… I…uhm…I” you quickly wiped your eyes so you didn’t ruin your makeup
“Because we don’t see each other as much it makes me miss her more than I usually would so it’s hard, but being here for her and she knows she can always rely on me is all that matters until she is better.” You dried your eyes hoping your make up didn’t smudge making you look awful.
“Ahh, it must be so hard for you trying to cope with your career and everyone asking you questions while you’re just trying to do your best for your girlfriend. It must be hard for you to cry like this and seem vunerable considering your image is stoic and y, we all just wish for her to get better and for you to both be happy again”.

That night you didn’t message Solji, you just went back to your dorm/ apartment and lay in bed crying to yourself feeling broken not knowing what to do anymore, you couldn’t cope with all the pressure you felt.

You refused to leave your apartment that week, you didn’t want people to see you in your mental broken down state, your episode of happy together was released a few minutes ago so you sat in the dark watching it for the first time since being there. They kept in your little break down, so the public could see how broken you were.

You walked into your room and picked up your phone from the floor, you knew you had to pick yourself up and get back to work tomorrow. So, you grabbed your charger and plugged our phone in, the light of the apple logo blinding you as the screen came on for the first time in days. You walked out of the room only to comeback minutes later to check our notifications. The lock screen was filled with messages form one person who you needed the most. Solji had texted you trying to get you to answer but you didn’t see them until now. You read the last message she sent seeing ‘Hey, I don’t know when you will get this message but when you finally decide to answer me come around to my apartment, I want to spend some time with you before we are both busy again.’, you smiled a sad smile and got read grabbing your phone once it was reasonably charged putting on a mouth mask, sunglasses and a hat so no one would recognise you.

She was still and will always be your girlfriend but you couldn’t understand why you were so nervous to knock on the door, you didn’t even know why you were knocking you had a key. Finally fishing the key out of your pocket and unlocking the door.

As you opened the door your ears where filled with someone singing along to your songs. The song that was playing happened to be the sad song you had written for Solji on your 1 year anniversary. You saw her sitting on the floor with her back to you holding her dog (sorry I don’t know what Solji’s dog is called) and singing to him while doing a puzzle. You saw she only had a few pieces left so you decided to mess with her like old times. You threw one of her dog’s toys – to put your that just so happened to be laying around- discretely across the room.

“Yah what’s up with you now there is nothing there and I’m not playing catch” as she was distracted you swooped in and grabbed a piece of the puzzle, you knew she would come looking for it sooner or later.
“Yah where has the las piece gone, don’t tell me it fell out of the box” she walked right past you so it was time for you to take action. You scurried into the from room and sat on the floor putting the puzzle piece in place, awaiting her return.

“Oh, how nice of you ro finally turn up” you spoke up causing her to jump out of her skin as she walked into the room. She fell into your arms and began crying whilst you her back and head wiping the tears from her eyes “Shh Solji baby please don’t cry, you’re ok, I’m here for you remember” you managed to stay strong and not cry along with her.
“You didn’t answer me, I thought you had done something to yourself because I wasn’t answering you, every time you messaged me over the past month I wanted to reply but I didn’t, I thought it would make you worry more if I answered” she spoke after she stopped crying.
“There’s no need to worry about me, I would do something like that because I know it would only make you feel worse. I wouldn’t need to do that anyway because I have you in my life so I don’t need to feel sad”.

That night you stayed over, you stayed in her bed with her and held her close as she went to sleep, to reassure yourself that she was still there and to keep her safe from everything. You knew it would take a while for you to get to sleep but that didn’t matter, if you had Solji with you, you were as happy as you could be.