"All of my life I lived closed up to myself. I never really tried socializing with people. For me it was a way I could protect myself from feelings I did not know if I could handle. Sure, it protected me from getting hurt, but now it feels kind of boring. Having no friends is not fun at all. Maybe if I tried...Maybe if I could come out of my shell and start breaking this wall I built all these years...Maybe I could start living again..."

Rian

It was school time and Rian woke up full of energy. It's been a long time since she felt that good. Also it was the first time she felt like putting on some make up for school and generally doll herself up a little..."Okay...Let's not go overboard. Some concealer, some mascara and a small dose of a clear gloss. Oh, let's not forget the blush!" She thought as she checked herself in the mirror.

It felt good actually. Looking at  her reflexion she thought she looked like a totally different person. She actually looked pretty good. 

She felt confident and she felt proud of herself. It was all thanks to him. He made her wanting to look good.

When she came back home last night she got an angry phone call from her mother. Apparently Mrs. Park did not lose any time on  informing her about her daughter's escape on some stranger's motorcycle. Rian remembered her mother's words by heart. She had been a part of this argument for too long anyway.

"You can cry and shout all you want. You're going to these blind dates. Do you know how hard I'm working on finding the best ones for you? How ungrateful can you be? And who was this boy anyway?"
"Who mom?"
"The one with the motorcycle."
"It was Sehun."
"Sehun as our neighbor Sehun?"
"Yes..."
"Well, he's a good catch too. Is he your boyfriend?"
"Mom! No!"
"Why did you get on his bike then?"
"He's my friend from school."
"And since when do you have friends?"
"Well Sehun and I have been neighbors for so long..."
"I never saw you talking though."
"Well we do now! Stop with the interrogation! When will you realize? I'm a big girl now!"
"It still looks weird that you hopped on his motorcycle."
"I was trying to get away from your and Mrs. Park's craziness. How can you think of marrying  me off? I'm still 18!"
"You're not going to get married now now. In 2 years maybe..."
"Yes, just so you know that's not gonna happen...Oh you know what mom? I've had an overdose of your craziness today. Let's talk some other time. Get back to work."

"I'm going to investigate more on this Sehun guy. I think I like him."
"Mom! He has a girlfriend!"
"Oh does he? It's okay. You're prettier."
"How do you know?"
"You're my daughter." 
"What the- Mom? Mom? Did you hang up the phone? Mom?!"

She thought that even her weird mother liked Sehun. Does he have a magnet or something? How comes everyone likes him?

She took one last pick at the mirror and then went down to the kitchen for breakfast.

"Mrs. Lee?"
"Yes Minyoung what is it?" She asked her maid.
"Are you feeling okay?"
"Splendid. Why are you asking?"
"Oh nothing...It's just the make up, and the hair and- Nothing, it just felt a little bit weird seeing you like this."
"Do I look weird?"
"No no! Don't get me wrong! You look gorgeous! It's just that I'm not used to seeing you like this."
"So I look good?"
"Yes Miss, you look very good."
"Thank you. You made my day. Is Mr. Choi here?"
"Yes, he's waiting for you."
"Great. Good morning Minyoung!"

After finishing her breakfast, Rian headed towards her car. Mr. Choi waited for her and when he saw her he opened the door for her.

"Hey young lady. You look great today!"
"Thank you old man!"
"Now I think you owe me some explanations."
"Let's say I made your dreams come true."
"What are you talking about?"
"I think I made a new friend."
"Well he has to be a really good looking one, seeing how you took care of yourself like this."
"No! Mr. Choi it's not what you think!"
"Oh come on! It's a guy and you like him."
"I don't!"
"Lee Rian..."
"Okay I do."
"Then why are you calling him a friend?"
"Well, he sees me as a friend. Plus he has a girlfriend, or a soon to be one."
"I bet you're prettier."
"I'm not!"
"Lee Rian..."
"Okay I am."
"It's the first time I see you confident."
"Well, I feel like a bomb."
"Stop it."
"Okay, drive."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________
Rian remembered the last words she said to Mr. Choi. "\Well, I feel like a bomb." She could not help but laugh to her own words as she walked up to her class looking the same weird, timid and scared girl from before. The only thing that looked different was the make up on her face and her curly hair. She tried to walk confidently but the questionning looks on the students faces intimidated her.

"Goodmorning Rian! You look...different?" Sehun said, a laugh escaping his mouth.

"Oh god he's talking to me! It's not a dream, he's actually talking to me right now!" She thought, while trying to calm herself down.

However, she couldn't help but blush a little and look away.
 

"Well when I say different I mean it in a good way. You're pretty." He said as he smiled and walked away.

"First of all Oh Sehun , who gave you permission of smiling like that to me? And also, I look pretty?" She thought to herself.
"I look pretty." She said in a determined way and her walking changed. She started walking confidently. She was a pretty girl, why not be confident?

She finally got in her classroom and she felt all of her classmates' gazes on her. However she tried really hard not to back down. She would not look intimidated because of them. She was not weird. She was just...her. She looked them all in the eyes one by one. She wanted to show them she was here. And she was different. In their classroom, there was this girl whose name was Lee Rian and she was a beautiful, clever girl. The world had to see her potential.

She sat down on her desk and she heard a voice directed at her. 

"Yah! Lee Rian, what happened to you? At this rate you're going to surpass me in the hot girls list." Krystal said with a stunning smile. Rian realized just how much she liked Jung Soojung or Krystal. She was one of the best personalities she had ever met. She was rich yes, but she was always down to earth, not letting her money or fame take over her. She often empathized with people and she always tried to help people in need. She was also very talented in dancing and singing. She looked up to her. Krystal was somewhat an inspiration to Rian. She was the girl friend Rian always wanted to have.

"I have a long way till I reach you Krystal." Rian replied with a sincere smile.

"You know that's the first time you've talked to me right?"

"Yep..."

"Do you mind me sitting next to you?"
"Do you want to sit next to me?"
"Sure."
"Of course then." And both girls smiled sincerely to each other.

Throughout the lesson they did not exchange much words but Rian did not mind. They weren't that close yet, but Krystal made Rian feel comfortable and she was grateful for that. She kind of felt like a fangirl being noticed from her idol. 

The thoughts on Rian's head made her lose track of time, so the lesson finished quite quickly. It was their break time now and Rian did not know what to do. She wanted to do something different than sitting by herself somewhere quiet, but she had no one she could spend her time with. I mean yes she kind of had Sehun and Krystal but it would be weird to go to them.
 

Rian was walking at the school corridors when suddenly her attention was caught by some loud voices. She could recognize two. Soyeon's and Krystal's. She headed towards the crowd and tried to get an idea of what was happening. She saw the two girls confronting, almost insulting each other, and on the edge of a physical fight.

"You can't throw her out of the team like that! She's one of the best we have! Who said you have the authority to do something like that?" Krystal cried her voice out.
"Last time I checked I was our team's leader. I think it gives me enough of an authority to do what I want."
"You may be the one coming up with the choreographies and organizing the stuff, you may be the one helping Mrs. Alice to pick the girls, but in order to kick one of us out you have to ask her first. She's the teacher, if  you remember."
"Mrs. Alice trusts me enough to let me do whatever I consider right for the team. I think Sera is not good enough to be in MY team."
"When did this become YOUR team? Who do you think you are?"
"I'm someone you all can't dream to be."
"You're sick!"
"Well, instead of crying like a little baby here, why don't you practice a little more? If you want to be in a position where you can decide for the team try to beat me up. It will be funny. Get out of my sight now." Soyeon said ruthlessly and she pushed Krystal. She fell down. She was so shocked, she didn't even try to avoid her. You could see it in her eyes. How much she wanted to kill Soyeon.

Rian run to her and helped her stand up.

"Yah...What do you think you're doing?" Rian said to...Soyeon? "Oh why don't you shut this big mouth of yours Lee Rian?!" Rian thought to herself. What she did was just crazy. How could she talk back to Soyeon? Well, on a second thought, it was too late to back down now.

Soyeon turned around to see who was the owner of the voice that dared to provoke her. When she saw Rian her eyes shot wide open.

"What?! Lee Rian?! Hahahahahahahha!" She started laughing sarcastically.

"I have to admit, I'm shocked. I thought you were deaf and mute all this time. You can actually speak. Good for you." She said with a vicious smile.
"You have to get used to my voice then, because I think I'll use it quite often from now on." "You just can't stop, can you?!" The voice in her head kept interfering.

"To what do we owe the pleasure?" 
"Oh I don't know. Let's say I can't stand a certain type of people. Someone like you for exampe." Rian did not know where she found the courage to say such things, but it was her anger that was speaking at the moment. How could someone humiliate a person like that? What gave her the right to say such things to Krystal? What gave her the right to behave like that in general? Someone had to stop her, and if no one was willing to oppose Soyeon's highness then Rian would.

"You don't want to mess with me Lee Rian. Don't provoke me."
 Rian simply took Krystal's hand and took her away from the crowd. They headed to the school's roof.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________
What Soyeon and Rian didn't know was that Sehun was watching the entire encounter. At first he did not say a thing because he wanted to see just how far Soyeon would go with that attitude. When he thought she passed the limits and decided to act, someone else did before him. He was thrilled to see that Rian had stepped in the argument, so he stayed back and watched from afar, curious as to how she would handle the situation. When this was all over his feelings were mixed. He felt disgusted by Soyeon's behaviour, but somewhat proud of Rian's courage to face Soyeon. To Sehun, Rian started to feel like a student, and he felt like her mentor.

"Se the boys just told me what happened! If only I was there!" Jongin said as he reached Sehun.
"Is Krystal okay?" Sehun answered.
"I don't know, I can't find her. She left with Rian. Do you believe that Lee Rian actually did that?"
"She's an extremely weird creature."
"As for Soyeon, man she...I don't know. I can't find the right words for her. The boys told me she was like a snake pouring out all of her poison. If she wasn't your girlfriend I would punch her face!"
"I'm disappointed Kai..."
"What will you do?"
"I guess I'll talk to her..."
"Yeah, good luck with that. Tell her that I'm only letting that go because of you. I'll try to find Krystal."

Sehun got out his phone and called Soyeon.

"Hun!"
"Where are you?" He said coldly.
"What's wrong Hun? Did something happen?"
"Are you kitting me Soyeon? Do you really ask what's wrong?!"

"Well if I'm asking you it means I don't know."
"I'll help you understand then. Let's meet."
"I'm coming to the school's entrance."

Sehun waited for Soyeon to arrive.

"So? What is it that made you so upset?"
"I saw it all."
"Do you mean...before...eh with Krystal?"
"Yes that's exactly what I mean. Would you like to explain yourself?"
"I have nothing to explain. I'm their leader. I think Sera is not a good fit for the team, so I kicked her out. What's wrong with this?"
"Do you even know how she must feel right now? These girls do everything to enter this stupid team of yours and you treat them like trash! Also you know Krystal is my best friend's girlfriend, right?"
"Hunnie..." She said tearing up.
"Not you too...Don't turn your back on me...Don't talk to me like that." She continued.
"Do you even know what it feels like to be humiliated like that? You have never experienced it, so you have no idea, but I'll tell you it feels terrible."
"Have you ever been humiliated before Hun?"
"No, but you can see the hurt in their eyes. Just because it's easy for you to have everything doesn't mean it's the same for everyone."
"Well, I was mad! I was furious! And it's all your fault you know! I tried not to say anything. I tried to swallow everything up. Do you have any idea of how much I've waited for you yesterday Hun? I was so excited that you asked to meet up. I thought you would ask me to be your girlfriend. But you didn't even show up. You didn't even pick up your phone when I called you! Do you know what this means for a girl? I'll expain Hun... I've been humiliated before. Don't you get it?  I've been humiliated by you."

Sehun suddenly did not know what to say. Soyeon was right. He was at fault. He was just as unfair as she was.

Soyeon started crying.

"Think of it Hun. I'm going back to class."

And like that Sehun was left alone with his thoughts. He liked Soyeon, and he made her feel bad. He wanted to make up for that.  He also had to make her understand that her attitude was wrong. But what could he possibly do?

________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Meanwhile Rian comforted Krystal, as she could not stop crying from frustration.

"Thank you for today. You were awesome you know..." Krystal said and she held Rian's hand.
"She was being a brat. I don't know. I just had to do something."
"You literally shut her up. Did you see the shock in her eyes? She could not believe it!"

And the conversation kept going, and the day got carried on and Rian somehow stopped feeling like an outsider. Being at school suddenly did not feel so bad. Breaking her walls was actually not a bad idea...It was something that gave her courage to go on.

Author's corner

I enjoy writing this story so much :) 
I actually moved to another city by myself today and I am a little bit tired but I thought I would write a new chapter.
Hope you like it!