word count: 612

1/2 update for today.

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December 26, 2016

Exactly one month ago. Seungcheol was weeping on the hospital floor.

He's standing by the grass on their garden, It was a very cold day, indeed.

He's been staring at the Angel orchids Jihoon loved so much, they were pretty. They were well kept despite the harsh cold that's going on

right now.

Seungcheol was past the depressed stage but he wasn't far from that. He took care of himself for Jihoon, ate well everyday and got

enough sleep. The pain was still there, and it will be for a very long time.

He would wake up everyday, hoping that he dreamt everything up, but he feels the colds side of the bed and it crashes to him, the reality

crushes him. It was too much for him to handle. He doesn't know if finding Jihoon in the next life would be possible. Sometimes he get's so

lonely that he asks himself what he did to deserve this. He was suffering and he was suffering alone in their house, His and Jihoon's house.

March 8, 2017

"Broken" was still a word Seungcheol would use for himself, but not as often as he did months ago. He talks to Jihoon's urn everyday.

Jihoon's urn was placed in the garden surrounded by beautiful orchids.

The garden now had glass walls and roof and it looked like a mini greenhouse.

"Jihoonie, Honestly, How will I do this?" He asked slumping down on the grass. "I have a new job now. I'm healthy too. I already told you

the job thing yesterday but, i don't know. I just really want to talk to you."

His eyes tracing the markings on the urn. Lee Jihoon.

"I really love you still, I'd love you forever." He said the nth time to Jihoon. "Please talk to me, or something."

"Make me feel your warmth again." Seungcheol said absentmindedly but he feels warm breeze enveloping him but he doesn't see the

plants move, his eyes just looked at the urn as they turned glassy. Last time he checked, the garden doesn't have a window but solid glass

walls and roof. Then his heart rapidly began beating as the warmth was still there. Then he hears his name in the wind.

That's when he broke down. His tears falling without hesitation.

As the warmth slowly disappears, he also catches a barely audible "I'm sorry." and "I love you." then the breeze was gone, but he doesn't

feel weak much. He looks at the urn

"Jihoon?" He said tears still falling "Don't be sorry."

His throat suddenly feels like closing, if he talks more he might really just break into tears and just stay there.

"Jihoonie-" He said his voice cracking "I love you too."

The orchids look whiter now and the grass looked really healthy with a vibrant shade in it.

Seungcheol just smiled then, though there were still a few drops of tears in his eyes as if he haven't cried enough yet.

Seungcheol was smiling again.

And, god, Jihoon was relieved seeing Seungcheol smile again.

END

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no note for now.

also is it too much angst for all of you?

hahahahah, good.

DIDN'T PROOF READ.