Chapter 16: Afflicting her

KANA

I don’t have any idea what people do on bars but I agreed to go with Meilee anyway. The sounds are loud, lights flickering, people dancing all around. Everything is weird for me. I’m not used to this kind of atmosphere and it worries the hell out of me. But what worries me the most is seeing Chanyeol here. There’s a 60% possibility that I may end up seeing him here. We’re in the same place. I just hope they are all in a different place as we are. Maybe hanging out in the pool or something.

“Unnieeee!”

“Huh? What?” Maybe she’s talking to me? I’m to paranoid about my surroundings.

“I’ll get us a seat. Can you get us some drinks?”

“Drinks? Like water kind of drink?” She laughs out loud and shakes her head in disbelief. Well excuse me for being a first timer in this place.

“Silly, just get something light over there. He’ll know what to do.” She says and walks over to find us a booth.

I sigh and walked to the counter. I looked around me and people are drinking like there’s no tomorrow. Oh god. A guy approaches me as he cleans the glass. Well something familiar I’ve read in books.

“Can I get you something?” he asks.

“Something light. My friend told me to tell you that. She said you’ll know what to do.”

He chuckles and nods. He started to do his thing on the bar and I watch him. So this is how things work. He comes back with two glasses on his hand and places it in the counter. “Two so called light drinks for you miss.”

I smile and grabbed it. “Thanks.”

I walk back and scanned the place for Meilee. A couple on the side catches my attention. Wow, they’re so intimate. Is this how it works here? You get drunk then get intim- oh wait. The glass falls from my hand seeing a familiar face. It’s Chanyeol.

“Hye J-” He saw me.

What do I do? But I broke the glass. I’m tearing up. I don’t know what causes my tears. Is it the fact that I broke the glass or the fact that I am seeing Chanyeol getting intimate with another girl. I chose to believe the first and lowered down to clear the glass. The bartender from earlier runs and grabs my hand.

“I know it’s your first time. Let me tell you, we do not let pretty girls hurt their fingers. I’ll clear them up for you.”

“Thank you.” I say and stand. Chanyeol continues to look at me like our eyes are glued together. The girl turns around and looks at me too. Anyone who’ll see us right now would think that we’re in the middle of a staring contest.

“Do you know her?” The girl asks. Chanyeol shifted his look to the girl and kisses her. He kissed her. In front of me. I looked away. It’s too painful to watch.

“Unnie! What are- oh .” She says seeing Chanyeol. “Come on, we’re out of here.” She grabs my wrist and we are on our way out. I can’t look at the way fully because my tears are blocking it.

“Oh? Out already?” Yoohan asked. “What’s wrong?”

I bit my lip and it’s starting to hurt. I will not cry. I will not damn cry. My knees are getting weak. I give in and fell on the ground and I started to cry.

“Kana, what’s wrong?” Yoohan asked again and hugs me.

“He’s in there. Chanyeol oppa is inside.” Meilee said.

“Did he do something to you? Come on tell me-” Yoohan was about to go inside but I stopped him.

“No. No he didn’t.” I sniffed and cleared my eyes. “I want to go home. Let’s just go.”

Yoohan sighs and runs his hand on his hair in frustration. “Let’s go.”

- - - - - - - - - - 

CHANYEOL

I’m so ed up. Why did I do that? This is so damn wrong.

“I can say that she’s Byun Kana. You just used me again Chanyeol.” Hye Jin says and chuckled. “You just used me twice already. First, when you got drunk and called me Kana when I took you home. You kissed me that day. Second, now. You kissed me again. Just what the hell is that girl to you?”

“I’m not in the mood to talk okay?” I replied and threw myself at the couch. I’m so frustrated I don’t know what to do.

“You’re not in the mood? Why the hell are you reacting this way?! I already told you how many times how I felt about you! Don’t you consider what I feel?”

“Please Hye Jin. Just- Can you please just go home for now?”

“No! I won’t leave until you say something!”

“JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF MY PLACE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!” she flinches as I snapped. She scoffs and glares at me. I’ve done it again. I kept on using her just to forget about Kana. What the hell am I doing? She grabs her bag and leaves.

“Ugggh!” I groaned and placed my hands on my face. Why am I feeling bad about this? I should be glad right? I hurt her back. Now we’re even.

Even…

What does that give me? Now what?

- - - - - - - - - - 

KANA

“Have you given the prescriptions today?” I asked the attending nurse.

“Yes Dr. Byun.”

“Okay thank you.” I returned the chart back to her and make my way out of the room. I noticed her looking at me so I smiled. “What is it?”

“Dr. Byun, are you feeling fine? You look sick.”

“I’m fine. Perfectly fine.” I replied.

I’m done doing the rounds for the morning. Now what? I can’t wish for something bad to happen just for me to have something to do. That’s a selfish thing to do.

“Kana.” I stopped on my tracks and saw Yoohan.

“Hi.” I greeted and he walks closer.

“I told you not to come today. Look at you, you’re pale.”

“I’m fine.” He grabs my hand and stops me from walking. “Stop it.”

“You’re a doctor. You think you can work in that condition?”

“Then what will I do?! Do I mock in my room all day? I can’t let my daughter see me like this just because of a man that I hurt is getting intimate with another girl!”

I’m crying again. Does anyone record who cries a hundred times in a day? Because I think I can set a record for that. Yoohan grabs me and took me in his office. He closes the door and hugs me.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered and I felt his head on mine. “I’m so sorry so please stop crying.”

“What are you saying sorry for?” I say and moved back to him. He lets me sit to his couch and sits in front of me. He wipes my tears for me and smiles.

“Want to grab something to eat?”

“I’m not hungry Yoohan.”

“Even for shaved ice?” I smiled.

“Fine.” He chuckles and we stand making our way out.

- - - - - - - - - - 

CHANYEOL

Shaved Ice always cool my head up. I always go here back in high school with Kana- Can we stop remembering her? Ever since we broke up I still haven’t gotten over her. I shoved two spoonfuls of shaved ice on my mouth and chugged it all in. I have to forget about her. I have to forget about her. I chant with my eyes close. I opened my eyes. I still am not over her. I think I am seeing things. I can see her in the same place I do. I wore my cap so as not to be recognized and looked away. I watch them from afar. She’s with Yoohan. She doesn’t look good.

“I’ll get us something so just stay here.”

“Mm. Thanks.” She replies and leans on the couch. How can I find her still beautiful when I hate her? She’s beautiful in that white gown. She’s a beautiful doctor. “My head hurts..” She says throwing her head at the head of the couch. I can’t stop watching her. I miss her. But the fact that she hurt me made me hate her. She stands and makes her way closer to where I am. I guess she’s going to the restroom. I am still watching her.

“Cha-Chanyeol?” She saw me. She saw me because I am watching her.

I stand from my seat and looked at her. “What an odd coincidence to see you here.”

“Yeah. I guess so too.” She replied.

“I hate to see you’re doing well. It will make me feel better if you’re suffering.”

She gives me a painful smile and nods. “Yeah, I think so too. It would be nice if that will happen.”

I scoffed. I notice Yoohan is coming back so I grabbed her with me and closed the door to the comfort room. Good thing it’s a comfort room for all genders. I pinned her against the wall and glared at her.

“Why are you being like this? You have a nerve to act like this when you have hurt me?”

“I’m sorry…” she’s crying again. Why is it that I always make her cry and Yoohan doesn’t? Why is it that Lu Han can’t make her cry but I can?

“Stop it. You always cry when you’re with me. I hate that.”

“I’m sorry…”

“I told you to stop damn it!” I pressed my lips to her and she gasps in surprise. I kiss her. I kiss her hard because I’m mad at her. She pushes me back. She doesn’t want me. I scoffed. “Now you don’t want me? You want Yoohan than me because you can see Lu Han in him. That’s it right? That’s why you chose him over me. You’re using Yoohan to-” I felt her hand on my cheek. She slapped me.

“Who are you?” She says then left. I’m even more ed up now.